Love Hard

by Nalini Singh

  “No,” Darren said, then dropped the bombshell. “Everett just inked a massive deal with a major US-based retailer. That retailer wants to shoot a couple of promo pieces with you in New York, the big one for a billboard in Times Square. Sorry, my man, but you’ll have to get in the underwear again.”

  Groaning, Jake shoved his fingers through his hair. “What about Vili, Leo, and Christian?” he asked beneath the buzz of conversation in the locker room. It wasn’t only about visibility—he didn’t want his teammates pushed aside just because a random buyer had decided Jake would make the better visual.

  “They’re fine,” Darren said. “Everett’s also inked several other deals. He and his team have been busy over the past few months. I have to let their agents give the guys the news first, but one’s headed to Tokyo, another to Berlin, third to London.”

  Jake’s eyes widened. “Everett’s going global?”

  “You better believe it. Buy Gabe a beer when you talk to him—I know he convinced you to take this gig, and because of that, you’re about to make a shit-ton of money.” Darren sounded like he was rubbing his hands in smug exaltation. “And don’t forget to thank me, too, for negotiating you a contract that means you’ll be paid extra for just breathing outside the country.”

  Jake’s head spun as Darren continued on. “I’m sending the dates to your phone. Reply today and let me know if your cute kid is hitching a ride. I’ll get the other side to arrange a babysitter for when you’re on a shoot.”

  Jake stared at his phone after Darren hung up. He knew Esme would love to go with him—they’d done small daddy-daughter trips around New Zealand and she was always excited to travel. But the idea of her being watched by a stranger while he was on a shoot didn’t sit right.

  “Fucking Tokyo!” Phone to his ear, Viliame punched his fist in the air. “I’m gonna chow down on some butter ramen.” He scanned the room. “None of you assholes better tattle to the nutritionist.”

  Leo was asking Vili what was going on when his own phone rang. Christian had already flown home to the South Island—they’d see him, Piri, and a number of others again when the national squad re-formed for the first proper training camp.

  Not long afterward, Leo said, “This boy is going to strut his stuff in Berlin.” Towel wrapped around his hips, he did a prancing walk down the center of the locker room.

  Chaos erupted.

  “Jesus Christ, Leo, have some respect for the sanctity of the locker room!”

  “The greats would turn over in their rugby boots if they could see you!”

  “Your smizing needs work anyway.”

  “Did you see how he wobbled on the turn? Three out of ten at best.”

  Leo, undaunted, took a bow. “At least I’m not so whipped I watch those modeling shows with my girlfriend.”

  “That’s because you’d have to hang with a woman for longer than a night to actually have a girlfriend,” Ambrose pointed out reasonably in his deep tone, the back of his shoulder bearing a tattoo of a love heart with the word Bria inside it.

  “What the hell is smizing?” Vili scratched his head.

  Leaving the others to their banter, Jake got dressed, then grabbed his bag and headed out. They had a team meeting later today to talk over their season, but he was free for a couple of hours. The first thing he did after getting to the privacy of his car was call Juliet.

  “New York?” he growled when she answered. “Times Square?”

  “What?” she retorted. “You never had dreams of bright lights and fame?”

  “Only when those lights illuminate a rugby field.”

  “Don’t worry, Jacob. I’ll be there to hold your hand.”

  Jake suddenly didn’t give a shit about the giant billboard that would soon be sporting his underwear-covered family jewels. “You’re coming to New York?” Heart thundering, he did an exultant fist pump.

  “A senior member of the E. E. Designs team is going with each of you. It’s Everett’s brand. We have to manage it,” she added, so prim and proper that he might’ve even fallen for it—if he was a sucker.

  “Yeah?” he said slowly. “You gonna manage me, Jules?”

  A hitch in her breath. “We will not be discussing that topic. And no more roses. My office smells like a funeral parlor.”

  He made a mental note to send her more roses every week—because that tone of hers? He’d heard it before. It was the one she used when she got flustered or scared and was trying to bluff her way out. “Don’t worry, you’ll have a tiny chaperone to protect your honor.” Except when said tiny chaperone was sleeping—then all bets were off. “I’m thinking of taking Esme.”

  “Oh, you should!” Juliet’s smile was in her voice, and he knew it was real. Juliet’s snark was real and so was her delight. She wasn’t much good at playing games or hiding how she felt.

  “She’ll adore it,” Juliet continued. “I can keep an eye on her while you’re doing the shoots and meetings.”

  That quickly, the decision was easy. He trusted Juliet, knew she’d care for Esme’s heart. Not just because Esme was Calypso’s baby girl but because that was who Juliet was as a person—twice when she’d ended up in detention, it had been because she’d decided to beat up bullies who’d been picking on weaker kids.

  One bully had been a boy, the other a girl.

  Neither had come out on top of Juliet. The woman was a ferocious warrior in defense of those she considered weaker and more vulnerable. Jake had been away on a rugby trip during the first fight, had found out what was going on after the second fight was nearly over.

  It was a desperate text from Calypso that had sent him racing to the school’s back playing field. He’d had to drag an enraged Juliet off her male opponent—a boy twice her size. She’d tried to kick the guy even as Jake literally lifted her away, knowing she’d be in even worse trouble if she landed a punch or kick that did more than bruise. As it was, she’d ended up in detention for a month.

  Meanwhile, though the bully might’ve escaped adult punishment, he’d never lived down the fact he’d been beaten by a skinny girl half his size. And Jake had learned something—to keep his eyes open in a way he never before had. Busy with his love of cars and with rugby and with Calypso, he hadn’t spotted the bullying.

  “Did I ever tell you I had a talk with Paul Sweeney?” he found himself saying.

  “Paul— You mean that preppy A-student bastard who lived to make weaker kids’ lives hell?” A pause. “Though he did have a sudden change of heart partway through the year. Must’ve been some talk.”

  “No one wanted to mess with me or Danny. Not when we had the Bishop and Sailor for backup.” Four brothers who stood as a single unit, one of them a rugby legend, another heavily muscled from his physical work, were enough to scare any bully.

  “I was planning to kick him in the nuts before he had his awakening,” Juliet muttered. “Then it was like he began to avoid me— Wait a minute. Jacob Esera, did you warn Paul against coming near me?” A deadly tone to her voice.

  “I warned him it’d probably be better for his health and macho reputation. I mean, everyone knew what you did to Jiro.”

  Something that sounded like a snorted laugh. “Yeah, he wasn’t such a big man then, was he?” She still sounded exactly as satisfied as she had a month after the altercation, when she finally got out of detention.

  She hadn’t been sorry for an instant.

  Smile curving his lips, he said, “How’s the whole Reid situation going? I’ve been in the gym for a couple of hours.” A good, hard workout that had given him an outlet for his anger at what that ass was trying to do to her.

  “I have crushed that worm under my stiletto,” Juliet said, her tone razor sharp. “Unfortunately, the media is now in love with me. Idiots won’t stop calling with offers to do a lifestyle piece on my ‘rise from a woman scorned to a powerful player in the business world.’” Gagging sounds.

  But Jake didn’t laugh. “Were you?”

  “What?”


  “The woman scorned?” He’d just assumed she’d done the walking away, but if it had been Reid…

  “I’d kick you in the nuts if you were standing in front of me right now.” He could hear her glare. “No, I’m not pining for Reid the Pinhead. For your information, I was the one who kicked him to the curb.” A hesitation in those words. “Actually, I’m not proud of it. I didn’t do any kicking. I just packed my stuff and walked.”

  Jake’s hand clenched on his phone. “Were you afraid of him?”

  “No, nothing like that.” Another hesitation. “Shit. I found him in our bed with Lisa.”

  Jake wasn’t a violent man, but Jesus fuck, Reid deserved a punch in the face. He said as much to Juliet.

  “No, he deserves obscurity. Don’t do anything that’ll give him a chance at fame.” An exhale. “Honestly? I was relieved to have such an open-and-shut reason to walk. I wanted to get out but kept hesitating. I don’t know why.”

  “Because you’re loyal.” Once Juliet picked a person as hers, she stuck. “Reid’s a fool to have given that up.”

  The pause that fell between them was taut with things unspoken.

  Noises in the background from Juliet’s end. “I have to go. Meeting.”

  After they’d hung up, Jake stared out his windscreen at nothing in particular, his mind on a tough girl who’d grown into a strong, intelligent woman. A woman who was about to go to New York with him. Americans didn’t follow rugby much—which was why the whole Times Square underwear thing had knocked him for six. Maybe the US company had some secret marketing plan.

  He didn’t honestly care.

  What he was interested in was that, until those billboards went up, no one in the vicinity was likely to recognize his face or care that he was part of the best rugby team in the world. He didn’t have to worry about Reid using Jake’s connection with Juliet to further drag her into the media.

  Jake smiled… then called up the florist website to order another bunch of dark red roses. These he sent with the message: Roses are red. Violets are blue. Stilettos crush worms. And so do you. ~ From the G to the VP.

  He wondered if she’d get it.

  Four hours later he received a message that said, Gearhead, you have too much time on your hands. ~ That’s Ms. Vice President to you.

  The tightness in his chest that he hadn’t been aware of carrying around eased in a rush of endorphins. Yeah, he had it bad for Juliet. And it still terrified him.

  Leaning back in his office chair where he’d been paying the invoice for Esme’s dance lessons, he turned to look at the photo of Calypso with Esme in her arms that he’d put on the shelf above the desk a while back.

  “Hey, Calypso,” he said, talking to a girl he’d once loved with all his teenage soul. “What if I get this wrong? What if I screw everything up?” His life. Esme’s. Juliet’s.

  Calypso smiled back at him, sweet and content and forever a teenage girl.

  Giving up on the admin for today, he pushed back his chair and glanced at his watch. It was almost time to pick up Esme. Deciding to start out early, he was halfway along the walk when his phone buzzed.

  “Sailor,” he said after glancing at the caller ID. “What’s up?”

  “Can you pick up Emmaline too? Small emergency at one of the nurseries. I’m hoping to beat the school traffic and head out.”

  “No worries. Want me to keep her overnight?” Emmaline had stuff at his place, as Esme did at Sailor and Ísa’s.

  “No. Ísa’s teaching an evening class today, but it finishes at seven thirty—she should be able to pick Em up around eight. Thanks, bro.”

  After hanging up, Jake took deep breaths of the crisp air and tried to figure out what the hell was going on inside him. He was deeply, passionately attracted to Juliet. He wanted to play with her. Fight with her. So why all the knots in his gut? It wasn’t as if she didn’t reciprocate—at least on the physical front. He could work with that.

  Yet the fear continued to gnaw at him.

  22

  Danny Becomes a Man of the Cloth

  A familiar figure up ahead by the school gate caught Jake’s attention. “Danny? What’re you doing here?”

  “Inviting myself to your place for dinner,” his younger brother said with a grin. “Dad’s taking Mum to a fancy restaurant, and I didn’t want to eat alone.” He held out a fist for Jake to bump.

  “I hope you’re looking forward to chicken nuggets and mashed potatoes.” Jake handmade and froze the nuggets in large batches to ensure they’d be healthy, and oven-cooked them instead of frying, but the girls considered it a treat nonetheless. “I’ll throw in coleslaw if you chop it.”

  “Sold!”

  Jake grinned; they both knew they’d be eating following the squad’s personalized nutrition guidelines for each of them. However, that wasn’t as difficult or as complicated as it sounded—he’d put in a chicken to roast, they’d do a ton of steamed or roasted vegetables, and that’d suit them.

  Breakfast would’ve been a different story. Jake liked his peanut-butter-infused fruit smoothies, along with oatmeal, while Danny was more into egg-white omelets and avocado, maybe a couple of pieces of fresh fruit. The squad’s nutritionist worked with each member of the team separately to give them advice while keeping in mind their likes and dislikes—because life would suck if they were on a weird-ass strict diet where they had to eat things they didn’t enjoy.

  The control was in their hands, but, in turn, they took the advice seriously.

  Danny hooked a thumb over his shoulder. “I know you and short stuff usually walk home, but I have my Jeep—I was thinking if you were free, we could do a post-school drive to the bay. I bought a huge bag of those tiny carrots that she likes for a snack.”

  “Yeah, sounds good.” Jake could do with the fresh air. “Emmaline’s coming with us too.”

  The bell rang at that instant, and the school disgorged children big and small. Yet Jake picked out his daughter among the crowd without a problem, her spectacles catching the light and her pigtails messy.

  Spotting him, she ran. “Daddy!”

  He grabbed her, squeezed her tight. He needed the hug today, needed her warmth and innocence. When she wriggled, he let her go so she could bump fists with Danny.

  “Where’s your partner in crime?” Danny asked even as Jake scanned the drive for Emmaline’s dark-haired head.

  “There she is.” Jake waved when he saw Emmaline’s searching gaze.

  Smile wide, she skipped over to him and he enfolded her in the same kind of hug he’d given Esme. As the girls were well used to being picked up by each other’s parents, their uncles, or grandparents, Emmaline had no hesitation in falling in with them—especially when Danny mentioned the beach and chicken nuggets.

  A short fifteen minutes later, the girls giggled as they ran around the neighborhood bay that had a patch of sand, some open grassy land, and a playground. Around it all was native bush. Come summer, Esme and Emmaline could swim in the bay, the water was so calm and clear.

  Jake and Danny played with them for a while, then sat on the stone wall facing the sand, from where they could keep an eye on the girls.

  “So, you ask Juliet out yet?”

  Jake didn’t groan; he’d long ago gotten used to having a little brother whose eyes were a touch too sharp. “How’d you figure it out?”

  “Saw you two walk back into the wedding reception together—way you were looking at her, bro…” A whistle. “Let’s say I never saw you look at Rachel that way. Also, you were totally scoping out her ass.”

  “Don’t talk about Jules’s ass,” Jake snapped back without thought.

  Danny’s laugh was loud and delighted. Hearing it, the girls looked over and waved before returning to their examination of the shells lying on the sand.

  “Like that, is it?” Danny leaned forward, the afternoon sunlight making the black strands of his hair gleam like jet. He had a bit of curl in it, as did Jake. But where Jake kept his croppe
d short and neat, Danny let his grow a little wilder. Just enough to touch the nape of his neck.

  “I know who she is, by the way.” Danny glanced back. “I was only two years behind you in school. It took me a while, but it finally clicked.” Dark eyes on Jake before Danny turned back to watch the girls. “Is that the problem? That she was Calypso’s friend?”

  “No.” Jake leaned forward to mirror Danny’s position… and then he talked. Because while Danny could be a wiseass, he was also Jake’s brother. And the Bishop-Esera brothers always had one another’s backs. “I sent her roses.”

  “That’s my man.” Grin back, Danny clapped him on the shoulder.

  Shoving a hand through his hair, Jake said, “I’m fucking scared, Danny.”

  “Scared?”

  “Knots in my gut, and half the time I feel as if I’m having a heart attack.” His chest would go all taut, his breathing shallow.

  Danny’s response was quiet. “You really like Juliet, don’t you? It’s not an easy, light thing like with Rachel?”

  Jake’s shoulders shook despite his tension. “Juliet is many things, but the words easy and light do not apply.”

  “I love her already.” Danny nudged him with his shoulder. “I want for you what Sailor has, what Gabe has—that deep-down forever kind of love. I mean, don’t you want your woman’s face to light up when you walk into a room? Our big bros have that.”

  The idea of Juliet’s face lighting up when she saw him, it punched all the air out of his lungs, he wanted it so much. “I’m not about to back off,” he told his brother. “I just wish I could figure out this fear.”

  Danny gave him a strange look. “Jake, you haven’t had a proper, serious relationship since your first girlfriend died almost overnight after being brought down by a sickness no one saw coming.” He waved off Jake’s attempt to interrupt. “Yeah, you went out with women, but you never took a risk again, never opened yourself up. Sounds to me like your Jules won’t stand for that kind of bullshit and you know it.”