Light Up The Night: A Bad Boy Firefighter Novel

by Parker, Weston

  My father got to his feet and scratched the back of his neck. “I came to tell you I was sorry.”

  I stared incredulously at him.

  He nodded. “I know. I know it’s late. And I know it’s weak, and you don’t have to accept it, but I am. I’m sorry. And I’m proud of you, Hayden. I’ve always been proud of you.”

  “Like hell you have.”

  “I deserve that. But trust me, I am. You handled your injury better than I did, and you were the one who got hurt, not me. I think I saw it as our world crumbling down around us. I missed your mother. I didn’t know how to do it on my own without her, and football was what united you and me. I thought I was going to lose it all.”

  “You lost it because you refused to accept that my knee injury was out of my control.”

  “I know that, son. I screwed up. I focused on raising you to be tough. To be able to do anything you wanted. And I succeeded. But at a terrible cost.”

  I didn’t say anything.

  “I lost you. I lost you a long time ago. And I didn’t deserve to keep you. I know that. And I didn’t know how to get back to you. I didn’t know how to talk to you.”

  “So it was easier to what? Ignore me?”

  “I’m ashamed.”

  I searched his eyes. “I could have confronted you earlier.”

  “It wasn’t your job to do that, Hayden. I was being a bad father. I have been for a long time now. I wasted so much time being angry and feeling ripped off that I missed out on what was right in front of me. A son who has dedicated his life to saving others.” He pressed his hand to his forehead, and for a moment, I thought he might cry. But he didn’t. He kept it together and took a steady breath. “You saved a child yesterday, Hayden. A three-year-old boy. How could I not be proud of you?”

  I had no answer for him. I’d been wondering the same damn thing for over a decade.

  He moved closer to my bed. “I want the relationship I had with my son back. I don’t want to keep going like this. Never talking. Always being angry. But I need help. Genevieve has been a good person for me to talk to. And you don’t have to forgive me. I’ll understand if you don’t. But I had to try, Hayden. I had to see if there was still a way we could—”

  “It’s all right, Dad.”

  “Sorry?”

  “I said it’s all right. I want the same thing. So let’s just wipe the slate clean, okay? A fresh start.”

  My father’s smile was the most genuine one I’d seen since my last football game. “Sounds good to me.”

  “You’re still on your own with that shed, though.”

  He laughed. I’d almost forgotten what it sounded like. But he laughed, and it rang true in my ears. “Still a smart ass, huh?”

  “I learned that from Mom.”

  “You sure did.”

  The room got a little awkward after that. Neither of us really knew what to say, and starting over with a clean slate was hard to do when fifty percent of the party was lying in a hospital bed.

  My dad hung around for another twenty minutes or so and then got ready to leave. “I’ll come back at six with dinner. How about that? You still like cheeseburgers, or are those a no go for a firefighter?”

  “I could go for a burger.”

  “No pickles?” my dad asked.

  I grinned. “No pickles.”

  “All right. I’ll see you at six.”

  “Sounds good.”

  He left, and I lay there, torn between being elated that he and I were getting a second chance and devastated that my relationship with Mel was over. Our conversation the previous day hung over me like a heavy dark cloud, and her tears were all I could think about until Rinehart walked into my room.

  I glanced up at him. “Chief?”

  He drew up a chair and fell heavily into it. “Miller.”

  “What are you doing here?”

  “I came to check in on you. I ran into your old man on the way out. I think it’s the first time I’ve ever seen him smiling. Not that it’s any of my business, but I assume the two of you have finally put your differences aside.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  “Happy to hear it.”

  I propped myself up and reached for the water on my nightstand. I took a sip, swished it around in my mouth a little, and nodded at my boss. “So, are you here to tell me I’m back on hose duty?”

  Rinehart studied me. I couldn’t tell what he was thinking. His expression remained neutral, and eventually, he sighed and crossed his thick arms across his even thicker chest. “No, I’m not. Quite the opposite, actually.”

  “Oh?”

  He nodded. “If it weren’t for you and your complete lack of self-preservation instincts, a child would have died a horrible death yesterday. And I, for one, am very happy that did not happen. So is the child’s mother and father. So is this whole town.”

  I had no clue what to say, so I kept my mouth shut.

  “I will, however, have to say that you were once again reckless. And I don’t like that I’m never going to be able to take my eyes off you. You’re a fire hazard, Hayden, for lack of a better phrase.”

  I knew I was smiling. I tried to wipe it off my face but failed. “I think that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

  “Don’t let it get to your already very fat head,” Rinehart said as he rose slowly to his feet. “Take your time coming back to work, Miller. Get better. The boys all send their well wishes. Especially Maddox, who made it quite clear that out of everyone, you stand up for him the most.”

  “I think I’ve defended him twice.”

  “Better than the others.”

  I shrugged. “True.”

  Rinehart smiled. It was gone as soon as it came. “See you soon, Miller.”

  “Thanks, sir.”

  Before I even had a chance to be antsy that I was alone once more, Derek came back. He slid into the room with a cocky smile and said, “So your dad came by, huh?”

  “Yeah,” I said.

  “That’s a good thing, right?”

  “Yeah. We talked.”

  “And?”

  I gave him an annoyed look. “And he apologized. I don’t really want to dive into it with you. Don’t you have better things to do than hang around my hospital room all day?”

  “Nah. I want to be here. I was thinking we could look at some boats online.”

  “What?”

  Derek pulled the chair up close to the edge of my bed and nodded excitedly. “Yeah, man. I’ve been looking at swapping the old for the new. You know. Get something with a little more pep and a little less aluminum.”

  I arched an eyebrow. “Is this because the guys were giving you shit for having a small boat?”

  Derek glanced at me as he clicked through web pages on his phone. “What? No. I’ve been thinking about getting a new one for a while now.”

  “You have not.”

  “Have so. How would you even know?”

  I scratched at the stubble forming along my jaw. “Because you would have told me. You tell me everything. Even the things I really, really don’t want to know.”

  “That’s true,” he said. Then his expression became a little more serious. “On that note. There’s something I’m going to tell you that you might not want to hear. But I think someone needs to say it.”

  “Oh great. Here we go. What is it?”

  Derek put his phone away and looked me straight in the eyes. “You need to fix things with Mel. You have to get her back, man. Make things right. She cares about you, and I know you care about her too. The two of you are perfect for each other.”

  “I thought you didn’t like the whole single mom thing?”

  “I don’t. For me. But that girl is good for you, Hayden. Matter of fact, both of them are. You gotta fight for that. You made each other better.”

  “I don’t think she wants me to do that. You don’t know what she’s been through.”

  “It doesn’t matter what she’s been through,” Derek
said. “We’ve all been through shit. We all have baggage. But nothing is so bad that we should let it stand in the way of being happy again. Come on. Don’t roll over so easily. As soon as you’re back on your feet, you have to go get that girl and lay it all out there for her.”

  I sighed. I wasn’t sure it sounded like a good idea.

  “Hayden. If you don’t at least try, you’ll regret it forever.”

  34

  Mel

  I finished stacking all the patio furniture at the end of the night and came inside to turn off the outside lights. Tara was wiping down the bar and walking through the restaurant to make sure all the tables were clean. I walked to the back, grabbed the vacuum, and started doing the floors.

  It had been a week since I broke up with Hayden at the hospital, and I’d thought about him every day since. I kept tabs on him in the local paper, which said he was making a full recovery. He’d been released yesterday afternoon though, so the updates stopped, and now I felt really separated from him.

  It sucked.

  After I finished the floors, I put the vacuum away. Tara walked through the kitchen to make sure everything was as it should be, and then we both met in the back room to collect our things to go pick up Kylee from her friend’s house. A couple girls were over, and they were sleeping over, but Kylee didn’t like spending the night away from home unless she was going to Tara’s house.

  I could feel Tara watching me as I packed up my stuff. “Yes?” I asked, turning to face her.

  “Nothing,” she said quickly.

  I smirked. “Oh, come on. Don’t play dumb. What is it?”

  Tara sighed and leaned her hip against my desk. “I’m just worried about you. You’ve been off all week.”

  I wasn’t surprised to hear it. I’d felt off all week. With Hayden running around my mind, all I’d been feeling was guilt and regret and anxiety. After a week of not talking to him, I found myself wondering if I had made a terrible mistake.

  “I miss him,” I confessed.

  “You should call him,” Tara suggested.

  I slumped down into my office chair and rested my chin in my hand and my elbow on the desk. “I’ve thought about it. Believe me, I’ve thought about it.”

  “But?”

  “But I’m still afraid. I’m afraid that he’ll get hurt again, or worse, and I’ll be in that exact same spot I was in three years ago, but it would be worse because this time, Kylee is old enough to understand.”

  “I’m sorry I made you go on that date with him,” Tara said. “Maybe if I hadn’t been so pushy, this never would have happened. You never would have fallen in love with him, and you could have avoided all this heartache now.”

  “Yeah. Maybe.”

  “So, you’re in love with him?”

  “Wait. What?” I looked up at her.

  Tara was smiling at me. “I said ‘you never would have fallen in love with him if’, and you didn’t correct me. You agreed with me.”

  “That’s entrapment,” I said.

  Tara shrugged. “Maybe. But I wanted to know what sort of feelings we were talking about here. If he was just a guy you really liked, then I wouldn’t make a big deal about it. But if you love him, Mel, you can’t brush this under the rug. At some point, you have to take a chance on something, right?”

  I stood up and grabbed my purse. “Maybe.”

  Tara shook her head at me and wrapped her arm around my shoulders. “If not, I’ll be your boyfriend. You know I’d never let you down. And I sure as hell wouldn’t throw myself into any life or death situations. The riskiest thing I do is park in the ‘expectant mother’ parking spaces at the grocery store.”

  “You’re a bad person,” I scolded.

  “But you love me.”

  “I do.”

  I flicked off the lights as we went through the restaurant. Then we stepped outside, and I locked the doors behind me. Tara turned around, and I heard her draw in a sharp breath.

  I looked over at her. “Tara?”

  She pointed out through the entrance to the patio, and I followed the line of her finger.

  Hayden was standing where the sand from the beach met the stone patio. He had a bouquet of red, white, and purple flowers in his hand.

  “Oh,” I said blankly.

  Tara grabbed my purse from my shoulder, rummaged through it, and got my keys. “I’m going to go pick up Kylee.” She took my house and car key off the ring and then dropped them back in my purse. “You take your time.”

  I couldn’t say anything. I just stood there as Tara walked away. She stopped beside Hayden and put her hand on his shoulder. “Can you drive her home after?”

  “Sure, Tara,” he said.

  Then she smiled at me and disappeared around the side of the restaurant, leaving me alone with the man who had taken up residence in my mind since I left him in the hospital a week ago.

  “Fancy seeing you here,” Hayden said.

  “I could say the same about you.”

  Hayden came to stand in front of me on the patio. He was nicely dressed in dark blue jeans and a white button-up. I’d never know he’d just spent a week in the hospital.

  “Can I talk to you?” he asked.

  I nodded.

  He took my hand in his and guided me over to one of the patio sets. He unstacked it, set it down, and pulled out my chair for me. I took a seat, and he pulled up a chair so close to me that our knees were touching. He put the flowers down on the table.

  “They’re beautiful by the way,” I said.

  “Oh, they’re not for you,” he said.

  I smiled. “Uh huh.”

  He chuckled and shook his head. “Nah. They’re for you.”

  “Of course they are.”

  Hayden took both of my hands and held them between his. He ran his thumbs over my knuckles and looked deep into my eyes. “I wanted to apologize for my reckless behavior. I wasn’t thinking about what I was doing. I never am when there’s a fire. And that’s something I can get better at. But I can’t promise that I won’t ever take risks. I spent a week in that hospital bed because I saved a child. And that’s worth it to me. But I won’t ask you to make the same sacrifices if you can’t do it.”

  “His photo was in the paper,” I said. “The little boy.”

  Hayden nodded. “And he would have died if I didn’t move quickly and go in there after him. He was three, Mel. Those are the chances I’m always going to take. And one day, they might catch up with me. But that doesn’t mean I won’t try to keep saving people.”

  “And I wouldn’t ask you not to,” I whispered.

  He smiled. “Then that brings me to the next thing.”

  “There’s more?” I asked as a smile stretched my lips.

  He nodded. “Yes. Somebody told me to put it all on the line, and I think it was good advice. I haven’t stopped thinking about you since you came to see me in the hospital. Every second I was alone, I thought about you and Kylee. And I know without a shadow of a doubt that I don’t want a life without you and Kylee. And I’m in love with you, Mel.”

  My heart tried to leap out of my chest as the words left his lips. I didn’t even think—didn’t even process what he’d said—before I blurted out, “I love you too.”

  A smile washed over his features, and he pulled me in for a kiss. His lips were warm and soft, and he held my face in his hands as we kissed.

  When we broke apart, he stared into my eyes. “You have no idea how good it feels to hear you say that.”

  I giggled. “I think I have a bit of an idea.”

  He stroked my cheek with his thumb. “Mel. Sometimes love isn’t enough. Sometimes it’s too much of a burden. And I don’t want you to feel burdened by my job. Or always be afraid of what might happen. I can promise you that I will do everything I can to stay safe, but I still have to do what’s right.”

  I pressed my cheek into his palm. “I think I can live with that.”

  Hayden kissed me again. My body was tingling wi
th joy as he lifted me up in his arms. I grabbed the flowers from the table, and he spun me in a circle. I felt like I belonged in a romance movie. All that was missing was a long flowing dress.

  “What do you say we go back to your place?” he asked. “I’ve missed that kid of yours.”

  “She’s missed you too,” I said.

  * * *

  The ride back home from The Glade in Hayden’s truck was the best fifteen minutes I ever remembered having. We laughed the whole way, and I got him up to speed on everything that had happened over the week. He listened and laughed and cracked jokes, and it was like nothing had changed between us.

  When we pulled in the driveway and he put the truck in park, he looked over at me and put a hand on my knee. “You should also know that my dad came to see me in the hospital this time.”

  “He did?”

  Hayden nodded. “Yeah. Of his own volition, too.”

  “People can still surprise you.” I smiled. “Were you guys able to talk? I know things hadn’t left off on the best terms between the two of you.”

  “We talked. He apologized, actually. For everything. He said he had regrets and that he lost his way, and football was the only thing he thought we shared. And hearing him say it made it all make sense in a weird kind of way. Not that it justified his behavior, but I understand him now.”

  “I’m so happy for you, Hayden.”

  “Maybe in a few weeks, you could come for dinner at his place and meet him. Kylee would love his property. He has a pool.”

  “Kylee would love that. And so would I. But maybe we should give it a bit more time? Let him come around to being present in your life again before you try to overwhelm him with me and Kylee.”

  Hayden shook his head. “No. He said he wants to be part of my life. You two are my life. He’s either in or he’s out.”

  I leaned across the console and kissed him. “Sounds good to me.”

  We got out of the truck and walked arm in arm up to the front door. It was locked, so I had to knock because Tara had my keys. She opened it up seconds later and stood with her hand on her hip. “Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in.”

  “Who is it?” Kylee called from somewhere behind Tara.