Seal Team Ten

by Brockmann, Suzanne

  With her legs around his waist and her back against the slippery wall, her mobility was limited. But with Jake still holding her gaze, with all the pleasure he was feeling clearly written on his beautiful face, it was an incredible turn-on.

  And for the first time since Zoe could remember, she placed the complete control of her immediate future into another person's hands.

  Into Jake's very capable hands.

  He pushed himself a little bit further inside of her, smil­ing slightly as she moaned just a little too loudly.

  "Sh," he breathed, still holding her gaze as he took his sweet time.

  His next thrust was just as slow but twice as deep, and Zoe caught her lower lip between her teeth to keep from crying out again.

  Jake's smile widened. "That looks like something I should be doing." He leaned forward and gently tugged on her lip with his teeth. She moaned again—she couldn't help it.

  He laughed as he kissed her, filling her with his spirit as well as his body. The pleasure was so intense, Zoe couldn't do more than whisper his name.

  With the shower raining down on her sensitized skin, with his mouth doing things to her breasts that she'd never imagined possible, with the cold tile against her back and Jake, hot and heavy, moving so infuriatingly, wonderfully slowly inside of her...

  It was beyond perfect.

  She breathed his name again, and even though she didn't say it in so many words, he somehow knew she was close to the edge.

  "Come on, Zoe," he murmured, his lips on her ear, on her face, on her throat, her breasts. "You're gonna take me with you. I want to go right with you...."

  Zoe kissed him. As wave upon wave of pleasure ex­ploded around her, she kissed Jake so she wouldn't cry out. He inhaled her in return, driving himself even harder, even more deeply inside of her. She felt him explode, felt him shake with his release, just as he'd promised.

  And still Jake kissed her.

  He kissed her and kissed her and kissed her, holding her there pinned against the shower wall, still buried deeply inside of her.

  His mouth was so sweet, his lips so gentle, Zoe should have been in complete and unquestionable heaven. But she couldn't stop thinking. Now what? Jake had done it. He'd made love to another woman for the first time since his wife had died. What was he thinking? What was he feeling?

  Was he kissing her because he was trying to avoid facing himself another few minutes longer? Was he overwhelmed with regret? Did he hate himself? Did he hate her?

  But then, "I wish I could kiss you all night," he mur­mured, his breath warm against her ear. "I wish we could make love again, tonight, in a bed, no covers, lights on...."

  Relief made her laugh. He sounded all right. That was a good sign, wasn't it? "As much as I'd like that, too, I think the fact that our entire SEAL team would be watching might be a little distracting."

  Jake laughed, too, as he gently lowered her to the tub

  floor, as he turned away and efficiently cleaned himself up. "We're almost out of hot water," he said. "Want a shot at it before it's completely gone?"

  "Thanks."

  What had once been an awkward switching of positions in the crowded tub was now an opportunity for full body contact. Jake kissed her, and as she quickly lathered herself with the soap, he helped. He helped her rinse, too, his hands skimming her body, his touch so deliciously possessive. Who would've ever thought that would turn her on so com­pletely?

  He held her close, her back against his front, his arms wrapped around her, his hands caressing her breasts.

  "I can't seem to get enough of you," he said softly. "I think I might need two solid weeks of leave, a hotel with room service, a heavy-duty lock on the door, a king-size bed and you."

  Zoe closed her eyes as he weighed her breasts in the palms of his hands, as he kissed her neck, as she felt his body start to grow harder, already, against her rear end.

  But then he caught her hand. Her fingers were water­logged, the tips starting to wrinkle. "Uh-oh, we've been in here too long."

  The water was starting to run cold, and Zoe turned to look at Jake. "Are you ready to get out?"

  "No." But he reached past her to turn off the water. And then he stepped back from her, reaching outside the shower curtain for a towel. He opened it as he handed it to her, wrapping it around her shoulders.

  "Thanks."

  He started to step out of the shower, to get a towel and dry himself off in the bathroom—he didn't care who saw him naked—but Zoe caught his arm.

  "Really," she said quietly, looking into his eyes. "Thanks."

  He laughed slightly, shaking his head as he looked away

  from her, at his feet, before he leaned forward to kiss her. * 'Thank you"

  He stepped out of the shower, and Zoe realized he hadn't quite managed to look her completely in the eye.

  He'd had no problem holding her gaze while they were making love, but afterward... She realized that after, he'd done everything possible to keep from having to let her look deeply into his eyes.

  It was all an act. The sweet words, all of it. He wasn't okay with any of this—he was just pretending to be so as not to hurt her feelings. He was kissing her so he wouldn't really have to face the truth.

  Zoe shook herself. That was absurd. Jake was quite pos­sibly the most honest man she'd ever met. Why would he start hiding the truth from her now?

  Unless maybe he was hiding that truth from himself, as well.

  But now that the water was off, there was no way she could confront him.

  The shower curtain opened slightly, and Jake leaned in. He held something out to her—one of his T-shirts. "I fig­ured you wouldn't want to put that nightgown back on."

  It was impossibly sweet and completely considerate, but Jake definitely didn't hold her gaze. He quickly backed away, letting the shower curtain drop.

  "Thanks," Zoe whispered.

  Okay, so he wasn't completely happy about this. She'd expected that, hadn't she? She had absolutely no right to feel upset, no cause for this sudden ridiculous rush of tears that pressed against her eyelids and threatened to escape.

  What did she expect? That Jake would make love to her once and fall instantly in love with her? That he'd forget all about his life with Daisy?

  Zoe scrubbed her face with her towel, fiercely willing her tears away.

  But as she slipped Jake's T-shirt over her head, as she

  breathed in his familiar clean, warm scent, the tears re­turned.

  And she knew with a clarity that was unquestionable that although Jake hadn't fallen head over heels for her, she was completely, indisputably, impossibly in love with him.

  Chapter 15

  With her heart broke into a thousand pieces as she stood in the doorway that led to the recreation deck, watching Jake as he sat alone in the cold morning air.

  His back was against the concrete wall, his knees up and his head down on his folded arms.

  It was entirely possible that he was crying.

  Zoe had woken up this morning alone in their bed. It had been barely oh-six-hundred, and Jake was already gone.

  She'd washed quickly, shutting her mind to the memories of all that she and Jake had done in that very shower just hours earlier. But after she'd dressed, Jake still hadn't re­turned.

  She didn't need to be a rocket scientist to know where he'd gone. And even though she wasn't supposed to walk the halls of the former Frosty Cakes factory alone, she slipped out of their room and headed for the recreation deck.

  "So are you just going to stand there, or are you going

  to come out here and talk to me?" Jake lifted his head to look at her.

  How had he known she was here? She hadn't made a single sound as she'd approached. And she was positive that when her heart had broken, it had broken silently.

  She moved toward him slowly, warily, certain that she didn't want to see evidence of tears on his face. But his eyes were dry, and he managed to smile.

  Zoe sat next
to him, careful not to sit too close. "Are you all right?"

  This morning he could meet her gaze. His eyes looked tired. "I expected to feel really bad." He didn't try to pre­tend her question applied to anything else. "I thought I'd feel, you know, as if I'd cheated on Daisy." He shook his head. "But I don't. I feel..."

  He reached down and took her hand, lacing her fingers with his, squeezing her hand. Zoe just waited, praying he'd tell her how he felt. Praying he'd say the words she was dying to hear. It was ridiculous, really. In just a matter of seconds, she'd gone from brokenhearted to wildly hopeful. Holy Mike, if love could make a levelheaded person ex­perience emotional shifts more often associated with mental illnesses, she wasn't sure she wanted to be in love.

  Unfortunately, it wasn't something she could shut off.

  She'd tried that this morning, too. It wasn't going to happen.

  "I feel alive," Jake told her. "For the first time in years, I...honestly feel alive. It's..." He squinted at the overcast sky before glancing at her and smiling crookedly. "It's actually a little scary."

  Alive. Alive was good.

  Wasn't it?

  "You're amazing, you know," Jake told her. He put his arm around her, pulling her close. "Last night was... amazing." He kissed her, and Zoe's hope grew about a mile and a half high, like that magic bean stalk in that fairy tale. "You're exactly what I needed." He kissed her

  again, longer this time, his fingers lightly tracing her col­larbone at the open neckline of her shirt. ' 'Exactly."

  Zoe closed her eyes, dizzy from everything she was feel­ing. Desire—always desire, whenever Jake was concerned. He was, and would always be, the most desirable man in the world to her. Need, hope, she felt that, too, and plea­sure—such sweet pleasure from his kisses and his touch.

  Love. Oh, God, as terrifying as it was, she wanted him to love her, too. Just a little bit. She wouldn't need much to be satisfied—maybe just a tenth of the amount he'd given to Daisy....

  He kissed her again, and she shifted closer to him, mov­ing his hand so it covered her breast.

  He sighed and laughed. "I guess it wasn't hard for you to figure out what I like, huh?"

  Zoe kissed him, pushing herself more fully into his hand. "I'm glad I've got what you like."

  "I like everything about you, Zoe," he said, pulling back to look into her eyes. "Not just your body."

  Like. Not love. Still, his words were sweet.

  "We're in tune," he told her, "you and me. I can be completely honest with you—about everything. You know as well as I do how important this mission is. You know exactly what the dangers and the risks are. I don't have to hold things back to keep you from being upset." He paused. "And I don't have to worry about hurting you when this op is over and we go our separate ways."

  Oh, God. Zoe closed her eyes as she leaned against him. Now she was the one afraid to let him look into her eyes.

  "Maybe that's why I'm so okay about this," he mur­mured, running his fingers through her hair. "I know you're not looking for anything permanent. I know you don't want anything more than sex—I mean, friendship, sure, but... What we did last night was intensely powerful, but...it was mostly physical. I mean..." He laughed. "You don't want to marry me, right?"

  He didn't let her answer. She wasn't sure she could have

  answered. "But that's okay," he continued. "It's okay with me, and it's okay with you. And, see, that's what I think makes this work. I know that you know that I can't give you my heart."

  Jake's heart.

  In just a short amount of time, it had become the one thing in the world Zoe wanted more than anything. She wanted to walk out of the CRO compound in possession of the six missing canisters of Triple X, and Jake's heart.

  Jake kissed her, and she sat there, with his arms around her, watching the first few flakes of snow drift from the overcast sky, praying he wouldn't see the truth when he looked into her eyes.

  He was wrong.

  Somehow she'd broken all of her rules. Somehow she'd let herself cross that line. She was crazy in love with him.

  And she wanted his heart.

  Desperately.

  "He's not getting it done," Lucky said. "We're almost out of time."

  Harvard was giving him that stone-cold look that implied not only was Lucky a kindergartener, but he was a misbe­having kindergartener. ' 'What do you suggest we do, Lieu­tenant? Mutiny?"

  "No." Lucky took a deep breath. "Look. I just think it's been long enough. Let's try to get at least a few more men inside." He swore. "What we should do is get the entire team inside."

  "That's not going to happen," Harvard said. "Because even with my blond wig, my complexion is a little too far from fair."

  "So let's get in whoever we can get in. Me and Cowboy. Wes. We can give him one of those skinhead haircuts—"

  "Notice how he doesn't volunteer to shave his own head," Wes said.

  Lucky was completely exasperated. "Dammit, what dif­ference does it make?"

  "If it didn't make a difference, you'd've volunteered to shave your own—"

  "Fine, I'll shave my damn head! Let's just get the hell in there! I'm so damn tired of sitting here doing nothing!"

  As soon as the words were out of his mouth, Lucky realized that the problem here wasn't necessarily with Ad­miral Robinson. The problem was his.

  He swore again. And then he apologized. To all of them. Especially Wes Skelly and the senior chief. "I've got a little sister in San Diego. Ellen. She's still in college." He rubbed his forehead. God, his sinuses were killing him. "I keep thinking San Diego would be the perfect city for these clowns to test the Trip X, and it's making me crazy."

  "I've got a little sister, too," Wes said.

  "Yeah, I know that it's no excuse," Lucky said quietly. "We've all got family. I just... No offense, Crash, I know you're tight with the man, but admirals should stay-behind desks."

  "Even admirals who used to be SEALs who specialized in demolition?" Crash spoke so rarely that when he did open his mouth, the entire team paid attention. "Even ad­mirals who became so proficient with C-4 explosives that they literally wrote the book we all trained from—as well as the book that might be just a little too advanced for a few of us here?"

  "I didn't know that," Harvard admitted. "How come I didn't know that?"

  "You wouldn't. As the leader of the Gray Group, Jake's worked hard to keep a low profile," Crash said. "That's why that book by Scooter Jennings irks him so much. I know some of you have read it."

  "I have," Bobby said in his basso profundo. "It's good stuff."

  Cowboy lifted the book out of his lap, flashing a sheepish grin. No wonder he'd been so quiet during all this. He was

  "This

  reading, and he was just a few pages from the end. reads better than fiction."

  "I'm reading it after Junior," Harvard said.

  "It's all true, you know," Crash said. "And it chronicles just one of Jake's tours in Vietnam. He's seen more action than all of us in this room combined."

  Lucky couldn't keep his mouth shut. "But that was thirty years ago."

  "He's been out from his desk and in the real world often enough since then," Crash told him. "You guys want to hear a story?"

  "Oh, yeah," Wes said. "Uncle Crash, tell us kids a story."

  "S squared, wiseass," Bobby intoned. 'I want to hear."

  Cowboy, even fewer pages from the end, put down his book.

  Crash had their full attention. He smiled. "Jake was in Saudi Arabia during Desert Storm, and his team was as­signed to take out this one Iraqi Scud missile launcher that kept evading us. The Iraqis would fire the Scud at our troops, then move that sucker to a new location. Jake's SEAL team was working off of satellite pictures and getting nowhere, so Jake—he wasn't an admiral yet, but he was close—he tells whatever commodore was in charge that he and his men were going to try to check things out a little closer to the source. What he didn't say was that a little closer turned out to be downtown Bag
hdad, deep inside enemy lines. When they got into the city, Jake and his team split up. They had the locations where the Scud launcher had been set and fired from over the past few weeks, so they searched those neighborhoods for a place where some­thing that size might be hidden.

  "Jake's team finds not one, but two Scud missile launch­ers, and they uncover the location of a chemical weapons storage facility. So there Jake is, in the middle of Baghdad, with more than enough explosives to take out a single Scud launcher but not quite enough to do all three targets. He

  knew he could try to stretch it thin, but that way he risked destroying nothing."

  "Damn, what did he do?" Harvard asked.

  "I'd've blown the Scud launchers and given the location of the chemical site to intelligence," Wes said. "Have them take out the place through air strike."

  "Except those chemical sites were moved constantly," Lucky pointed out. "Even just a few hours later, it might've already been gone."

  "And this one was in the middle of a residential neigh­borhood," Crash told them. "Not the most PC site for an air raid." He smiled again. "Jake managed to take out all three targets with no civilian casualties."

  "How?" Lucky asked. "Did he find a munitions dump? Get his hands on more C-4?"

  "No," Crash said. "He took his time. And he thought it through. And when he was ready, and only when he was ready, he placed the explosives he had very strategically. It was risky, but the man's a wizard when it comes to blowing things up. He trusted himself, and he got the job done." He was looking directly at Lucky. "I think we should do the same—trust our team leader to get the job done."

  Lucky nodded. "Thank you, Lieutenant."

  Message received.

  On Tuesday, Zoe was assigned to clean bathrooms. She gave Jake a comically dark look as she headed down the hallway with Edith, a pale ghost of a woman who'd been assigned as her cleaning partner.

  Edith looked as if she'd be a breeze to evade. With luck, their pairing would be ongoing.

  Of course, it didn't really matter who Zoe was paired with. She would manage to get away from anyone. She was that good.