Butterfly

by Sylvester Stephens

  God knew I was lying. I knew I was lying. And Ms. Alicia knew I was lying, but for some reason, I could not stop myself from doing it.

  “Girl, stop lying!” Ms. Alicia snapped. “It’s a natural thing. You just have to appreciate your body and understand that it’s not just created for pleasure. It’s the essence of your womanhood. And never sacrifice your womanhood for attention, compliments, or anything other than mutual love. I’m not trying to be dramatic. but your body is the creation of life, and should be treated just as precious as a newborn child, because if you do not respect your body, and protect your body, there could be drastic consequences such as pregnancy, STDs, and some could be deadly. But right now, we don’t have to deal with that, do we?”

  “No, ma’am.”

  “You sure?”

  “Yes, ma’am. I’m not focused on boys right now. All of my focus is on getting through my senior year.”

  “Good! Well, you get some sleep and if you have any questions, just ask. We have an open-door policy around here, and you can come to Johnny and me about anything, okay?”

  “Okay.” I smiled.

  “Good night.”

  “Good night, Ms. Alicia.”

  • • •

  A couple of days later I started my first day of school at Duluth Christian Academy. I was kind of nervous when I went to my first class. I did not know anyone at the school but Bri, and she was not in any of my classes. I felt like everybody was looking at me strangely. I was the new girl, but the stares I was getting made me feel like a sideshow freak.

  I sat in the back of the class trying to take some of the attention off of me. There was a boy to my left and a boy to my right. They were both staring at me. I looked straight ahead and ignored them. I wanted the teacher to speak so badly, say something, anything, to get those boys’ attention off of me. God must have heard my prayers because Mr. Thompson, my drama teacher, began to speak.

  Mr. Thompson was about six feet tall. He was black, with light skin, a shaven bald head and was pretty cool. He used to be in the military, and as I would find out later, not shy about using his military training to keep us in line.

  “Hey, hey, people! Listen up!” Mr. Thompson immediately demanded our attention. “Some of you know me, some of you do not. I am your drama teacher. By the end of this school year, you will know everything it takes to perform a stage production. That will include everything from building a set, selecting your cast and crew, the performance and lastly, post-production. If by the end of this school year, you do not know how to build a set, select a cast and crew, perform your play, and successfully complete your post-production, you will not pass my class. Do you understand me?”

  “Yes!” the class answered in unison.

  “In this class, you will be graded as a team. There will be two grades, an ‘A’ for pass, and an ‘F’ for failure. No ‘B’, ‘C’ or ‘D’! No curves or midterms! It’s either ‘A’ or ‘F.’ One way or the other, everybody will receive the same grade. We will either pass or fail as a team. Is this understood?”

  I thought to myself, dude is deep. Although I knew he was trying to get us to understand the importance of teamwork, I did not want to fail due to someone else’s laziness.

  I was not the only one thinking that way because somebody had the courage to speak up, someone sitting in the front row. I looked at the kids sitting in my aisle to see who was speaking, and I could not believe my eyes. It was that girl, Asia, from the mall. Out of all the girls in the world, I had to end up in a class with that chick.

  “I don’t understand, Mr. Thompson,” Asia said. “Why do we have to share a grade? What if somebody is lazy or dumb? Why do all of us have to suffer because of them?”

  “Well, Ms. Asia,” Mr. Thompson said, “if you think that one of your classmates is dumb, you’ll have to be twice as smart. And if you think one of your classmates is lazy, then you’ll have to work twice as hard.”

  “My girl Asia is right, though,” Valencia said. “Why everybody gotta get the same grade?”

  Damn! Not only was Asia in my class, but her friend Valencia was, too. I scanned the room for the third girl, Jheri. And there she was, in the last seat in the second row. As soon as I saw them, I knew they were going to be trouble. I tried to keep my attention on Mr. Thompson and not the mean girls.

  “How many times do I have to say this, people?” Mr. Thompson said. “Production is a team effort! You will be a team! You will succeed together, or you will fail together!”

  “That’s not fair, Mr. Thompson!” Valencia said.

  “Life is not fair, Valencia. I’m preparing you for life.”

  At lunch, I was walking into the café and I saw Bri sitting at a table all by herself, even though the cafeteria was filled with kids. I walked over to her and sat next to her.

  “What are you doing over here all by yourself?”

  “Just having lunch.”

  “Where are your friends?”

  “I don’t have any friends.”

  “What do you mean you don’t have any friends?”

  “I just don’t have a lot of friends.”

  “You’re a sophomore. You have to have some friends, Bri.”

  “I know people, but I wouldn’t call them friends.”

  “What’s up with that, Bri?”

  “What’s up with what?”

  “Why don’t you have any friends?”

  “Because I don’t want any friends!”

  “Everybody wants friends.”

  “Well, I don’t!” Bri shouted.

  “Look, we’re like cousins, Bri. If something’s wrong you can just...”

  “Nothing’s wrong! Just leave me alone!”

  Bri jumped up from the table and walked away. She was very upset and it looked like she was crying. I didn’t get it. Bri was cute, rich, and smart. I could not figure out why she didn’t have one single friend.

  • • •

  The following Saturday, Dr. Forrester and I visited my father in prison. We sat down and I picked up the phone.

  “Hey, Daddy,” I said.

  “How’s my Butterfly?” Dad said.

  “I’m good. When is your parole?” I asked anxiously.

  “It’s not too far off,” Dad said. “What’s up, Doc?”

  “What’s up, Stone?” Dr. Forrester and my Dad shared a fist pound through the window. “How’s it going in here?”

  “Same old, same old,” Dad said. “Just trying to get up outta here.”

  “You’re going to get out, Daddy.”

  “That’s enough about me, Butterfly. How are things out there with you?”

  “I go to this Christian school. It’s a little different from public school but nothing major. I’m just trying to fit in right now.”

  “She’s not giving you any trouble, is she, Doc?”

  “Oh no, man. She’s a nice addition to the family.”

  “She’s not an inconvenience to your wife, is she?”

  “Stone!” Dr. Forrester said, “Shante is not an inconvenience to me or anyone else. She and my wife get along like they’ve known each other all of their lives. She and my daughter get along, too. Brittany even calls her ‘big sister.’ Everything is fine with us, man. No need for concern.”

  “I know, but I can’t help but be concerned. That’s my Butterfly.”

  “Your Butterfly is fine, Daddy.”

  “So are we talking college here or what?” Dad asked.

  “We’ll see. First, I have to get through high school.”

  “Come on, Butterfly, there’s nothing you can’t do. You’ll be the first one in our family to go to college.”

  “You got to be kidding me, Daddy?”

  “Our family ain’t never had no money or no desire to go to college. Yeah, you’ll be the first!”

  “Oh, man! Why did you tell me that?”

  “What’s the matter?”

  “That only adds more pressure, Daddy.”

  “Pressure? You a
in’t got no pressure on you.”

  “What if I mess up and don’t graduate?”

  “You control your destiny, baby. Nobody but you! To be able to control your destiny is not pressure; that’s a privilege.”

  “Your father’s right, Shante. You are under no pressure. Just go to school, do your best, and everything will be all right.”

  “I don’t know, Doctor Forrester. I don’t fit in with those kids at that school.”

  “That’s okay. They don’t matter! You’re not there for them! You’re there for you,” Dad reassured me.

  “But one of my teachers said we have to work together as a team. So those people do matter.”

  “That’s cool. Your teacher is right. Sometimes in life, we got to work as a team. It’s like a chain, and a chain is as strong as its weakest link.” Dad placed a sincere look on his face. “Listen to me, Butterfly; never, ever be satisfied with being the weakest link. Always strive to be that link that keeps the chain together. Sometimes that may mean you have to work twice as hard, or suffer twice as much. It may not be a glamorous job, but somebody gotta do it. The important thing is making sure you do everything you can to keep the chain strong. And that’s never pressure; that’s a privilege.”

  I think that as far as my dad was concerned, he was only talking in the moment. But for me, his words meant everything. He had absolutely no clue of how much he impacted me that day. He was just talking from his heart out of love, but he filled mine with strength and confidence.

  “Okay, Daddy.”

  “I’ve been thinking, Butterfly. It’s time for us to renegotiate our deal.”

  “Naw, Daddy, you can’t go back on your deal. You said you were going to act right and get out of here. A deal is a deal!”

  “I will do exactly what I promised, but I need more from you.”

  “What?”

  “I’ll be a perfect inmate if you be a perfect student.” Dad put his hand up to the glass window. “I promise I’ll get paroled if you promise to go to college.”

  “I don’t know if I want to go to college, Daddy.”

  “Then you must not want your old man to get out of prison.”

  “That ain’t fair; you’re trying to blackmail me.”

  “Life ain’t fair, Butterfly.”

  “That’s what Mr. Thompson said, too.”

  “Who the hell is Mr. Thompson?”

  “That’s my teacher I was telling you about.”

  “Oh. He’s a smart man. Listen to him.” Dad smiled and stared at me momentarily. “Well, do we have a deal?”

  “Okay, Daddy, but you know you ain’t right.”

  “If I was right, I wouldn’t be locked up, now would I?” Dad joked.

  “Okay, Daddy.” I laughed.

  “Okay, what?”

  “Okay, we have a deal.”

  “That’s what I’m talking about, Butterfly.”

  My dad had a huge grin on his face like he was the happiest man in the world. I smiled back, but I was not even sure if I was going to make it through my senior year. College was really a stretch. We spent the remainder of our visit laughing and talking about my adjustment to living with rich people. Once again, when it was time for me to leave my dad, I cried.

  • • •

  At school the next week, Bri and I were sitting in the cafeteria minding our own business. Then Asia, Valencia and Jheri came and sat right next to us running their big-ass mouths.

  “Snap! Snap!” Asia said as she held up her hands as if she was taking a picture of Bri.

  “Shut up!” Bri said.

  “Hey, Asia, now that it’s a new school year, we got another whole group of people to send that picture to; you still got it?” Valencia asked.

  “No, I deleted it; you got it, Jheri?”

  “Uh-huhn, it’s still in my phone.”

  “I don’t care if you got that picture, Jheri!” Bri yelled.

  “Snap! Snap!” Asia said again.

  “Why don’t y’all just leave me alone?” Bri shouted again.

  “’Cause we don’t like you,” Asia said.

  I didn’t know what was going on, but I was tired of being caught in the middle of something that did not involve me and I was going to find out.

  “Why do y’all keep picking on her?” I asked.

  “Because we want to!” Asia snapped. “We’ll pick on you, too.”

  “Hey, I’m not Bri, and I’m not going to keep arguing back and forth with y’all!”

  “Well, here I am!”

  I should have just sat back, taken a deep breath and then walked away. That is what I should have done, but I didn’t. Instead, I leaped across the table and grabbed Asia by her hair and pulled her little ass across the cafeteria floor. The next thing I know, Bri and I were back-to-back swinging and kicking. They got their licks in, but you better believe Bri and I got a lot more licks in than them.

  After they pulled us off of those girls, they took us to the office and made Bri and I sit on one side, and Asia, Valencia and Jheri sit on the other. Mrs. Gary, our principal, known for being a hard ass, read us the riot act.

  “Okay, ladies, we seem to have a problem that has to be resolved, and it has to be resolved now. So, are there any suggestions?”

  The girls looked at each other and then looked back at Mrs. Gary, but no one answered. I raised my hand and waited for Mrs. Gary to tell me to speak.

  “Shante?”

  “I think we need to find out what happened and then discuss it.”

  “I agree with you, Shante,” Mrs. Gary said. “What happened?”

  None of the girls said a word.

  “I don’t know exactly what happened between you all, but I do know that if you all don’t tell Mrs. Gary what happened, all of us are going to be in more trouble than what we’re in now.” The other girls still said nothing so I continued, “Bri, this is my senior year and I have to graduate. I’m in this trouble because I was trying to help you, now if you’re my friend. No, if you’re my cousin like we say we are, then tell Mrs. Gary what happened.”

  Bri looked at me and then she looked at Mrs. Gary. “Okay, Mrs. Gary, last year, I liked this boy named David and I thought he liked me back. He asked me to send him some pictures of me with no clothes on, and since I liked him, I did it. After we had sex the first time, he told me he loved me. We had sex a few more times and then he told me he didn’t want to be with me anymore. I was mad, but what could I do? If he didn’t like me, he didn’t like me.”

  As Bri was talking, I could not believe my ears. I had to give the girl credit; not only had she fooled her parents, she had fooled me, too. There is no way I would have believed that Bri was not a virgin. She never talked about having sex with anybody to me. We were both claiming to be the last American virgins.

  “He started going with Asia and he showed her those pictures of me. I guess he sent them to her phone and she started sending them to everybody at school.” Bri looked at Asia as she talked.

  “Is this true, Asia?”

  “No, Mrs. Gary.”

  “It’s in your best interest to tell me the truth, Asia! Right this minute!”

  “I’m telling you the truth, Mrs. Gary.”

  “Jheri? Valencia? Do you know anything about these pictures?”

  Jheri and Valencia looked at each other and then Valencia spoke up. “Asia sent the pictures to me, Jheri and a bunch of other people one day at school.”

  “Is this true, Jheri?”

  “Yes.”

  “Is this David character a student here, Asia?”

  “No, he’s out of school.”

  “As in graduated?”

  “Yes.”

  “You two were dating a grown man?”

  Bri and Asia looked at each other and then nodded their heads.

  “Oh my God, what is wrong with this world?” Mrs. Gray closed her eyes and rubbed her temples. When she opened them, she was through being diplomatic. “All right, we still haven’t resolved this feu
ding issue. Since you can’t do it on your own, I’ll do it for you. Shante, Bri, Jheri and Valencia, you will receive the mandatory three-day suspension for fighting. Asia, you will receive five days suspension plus a conference with your parents. And if I ever hear any mentioning of either one of you so much as looking at the other one cross-eyed, you will be expelled for the duration of this school year! And under no circumstances will you be permitted back on these school grounds. Now do I make myself perfectly clear?”

  We agreed in unison and Mrs. Gary excused us. I intentionally lagged behind to be the last one to leave. I waited for the others to walk out, and then I turned around to speak. “Mrs. Gary?”

  “Yes, Shante?”

  “Thanks for suspending us. I think we needed it.”

  “Wow! That’s a first. Nobody has ever thanked me for suspending them before.”

  “I was thanking you for caring enough to show us how to compromise when we have a problem, instead of just forcing it down our throat. I really do appreciate it.”

  “With that being said, I’ll see you in three days.” Mrs. Gary winked at me and smiled.

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  I felt good walking out of Mrs. Gary’s office, but I knew it would be short-lived. I still had to go home and explain to the Forresters.

  • • •

  Bri and I had to call Ms. Tonita to come pick us up from school because we had to leave immediately. Boy, did she let us have it.

  “Are you two happy now?”

  “No, ma’am,” Bri answered.

  “What about you back there in the backseat?” Ms. Tonita looked at me through the rearview mirror. “You happy now?”

  “No, ma’am.”

  “You got the WWF brawl that you wanted, so what was accomplished?”

  Bri and I sat quietly and did not respond.

  “Don’t get quiet now! A minute ago you were fighting and getting suspended and being all big and bad; now you want to act like good schoolgirls! What did you accomplish?” Ms. Tonita looked in the rear mirror to make eye contact with me and then screamed, “Answer me!”

  “Nothin’, ma’am!” I screamed back out of fear.

  “What about you, homegirl?” Ms. Tonita looked at Bri. “You bad now? Did you prove how tough you were?”

  “No, Ma, it wasn’t like that.”

  “Then what was it like?”