In Your Honor

by Heidi Hutchinson

  “Why?” she asked, a warm sensation spreading through her abdomen.

  “I was curious,” he shrugged, and pretended to focus on what he was doing.

  “So, I guess you know everything there is to know about me then.” Lucy had never looked herself up online so she really didn't know what information was out there. She would probably have to check on that soon.

  “Hardly.” He spoke earnestly, the playfulness gone. “The internet usually only has dates and times correct. It can't tell you who a person really is.”

  “What else could you possibly want to know about me?” Lucy rolled her eyes as she tried to fight her smile. He looked back at her feet studiously and she wanted the quiet to dissipate quickly, she enjoyed the lighthearted banter. She reached down and slapped his hands. “Okay, seriously, you can ask anything you want. I have no secrets.”

  “That can't be true, everyone has secrets.” The gold in his eyes brightened his face, or was that just his smile again?

  “No, really,” Lucy giggled. “I can't keep secrets, especially my own. I have nothing to hide.”

  He took a deep breath and leaned his head back on the couch, staring up at the ceiling. “Hmm, where to start...” He paused for far too long and she kicked him lightly. He laughed and looked back at her. “Sorry, I was just remembering how great you were on stage tonight.”

  ***

  She rolled her eyes again and he impulsively pinched her leg behind her knee. “Lenny wasn't kidding. You really are fantastic. I can see why they think you could have a solo career. You're captivating on stage.”

  She chewed on her lower lip and looked at her hands in her lap.

  “So, why doesn't that excite you?” He had picked up on her unease with this subject at the office. He hadn't planned on asking her about it now, but he couldn't help it. Something about her made him want to push all the limits. Flirt too much, ask too many questions, be too familiar.

  “That's not why I'm here,” she said simply. Her brown eyes reflected her deep honesty and he was, again, turned on his head by the obvious emotion that shone forth.

  “Why are you here, Newton?” he asked softly.

  “A friend asked me for a favor. I'm not gonna turn my back on my promise.” She smiled and twisted her fingers in her bracelets, a nervous habit he had also picked up on earlier that day.

  “Even if it's what you've always wanted?” he risked asking. He didn't know her that well, but he felt like he knew her and he was risking a lot with that assumption.

  Her lips twisted up slightly and she looked towards the ceiling. “You're good, Brookings.”

  “If you're so honest, and you have no secrets...” He paused when she narrowed her eyes at him. “Then how come you didn't say anything to Lenny this afternoon about not wanting that?”

  She blew a stray hair out of her face as her eyes wandered around the room before settling on Shane. “My grandmother always used to tell me that it was a bad idea to burn bridges when it was foggy.” She swallowed and looked down into her lap.

  “That leaves you in a weird place, doesn't it?” He rested a hand on her knee and stroked the top of it with his thumb.

  “It can't stay foggy forever, right?” She looked to him for confirmation, openly vulnerable, and all he wanted was to pull her into his life and help make all her dreams come true.

  “I have a feeling you're going to do amazing things,” he said instead. He could tell she needed him to change the subject, so he touched the stack of bracelets all along her wrist. “Do these have a story?”

  She smiled slowly, gratefully, before answering. “Yes, I made one for every time I sang a song that I had written in public.”

  “There's not very many here.” Shane frowned at the colorful array, counting maybe twelve in total.

  “I haven't done it very often,” she said with a touch of regret.

  She held her arm out and he took it in his hand as she explained each one, one at a time. The name of each song, the date and place it was sung. Some of the bracelets were gifts from her dad or friends, but they were all handmade.

  “When are you adding another one?” he asked, letting her arm slip back into her lap.

  “I don't know.” She wrinkled her nose and made a face that made him laugh. “I haven't written anything in a really long time.”

  He reached over and tapped her nose. “You better get on that, Newton. When I come back from New Zealand you had better be wearing a new bracelet.”

  “That's right!” Her eyes went wide. “You fly out tomorrow, yeah?”

  He nodded an affirmation.

  “What are you doing there?” she asked, her interest piqued.

  “Meeting up with a couple of friends to shred some lines and generally have an all-around blast.” He shifted a bit on the couch, sitting closer to her but keeping her legs draped across his lap. “Have you ever been snowboarding out of the country?”

  “I've never been snowboarding at all.” She shook her head, the messy knot on top bobbing a bit.

  “That's practically a crime,” Shane deadpanned. “What about surfing?”

  “Nope.” She shook her head again. “I can rope calves, though.”

  “Hmm,” Shane rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “How about, if you let me teach you how to snowboard and in exchange, you can teach me how to play guitar. And then I'll teach you how to surf and you can teach me how to ride a horse.” He took special delight in seeing her ears go cherry red.

  “Why should I learn these things? What do you love about it?” she asked, leaning forward a little and resting her elbows on her knees, her face animated. Her movement brought her face closer, and therefore her lips. Shane found himself distracted by them.

  He cleared his throat and looked around the room. “Everything. The freedom, the unpredictability.”

  “Do you miss competing?” she asked softly, drawing his eyes back to hers.

  “Not really. Why do you ask?” He cocked his head to the side.

  “That picture of you in your office with the medal...” She studied his face, as if looking for something specific. “You looked so happy.”

  “I was happy.” He smiled at her. “But I'm happy now, too.”

  He looked back at her lips and then to her eyes again. He really needed to stop looking at her mouth. He had to do something to break this spell he was under.

  He impulsively reached out and grabbed her in a hug, folding her against his chest and rubbing his knuckles on her head. She squealed and tried to escape, but he was a lot stronger than she was. He laughed and pulled her down against him as he reclined back the other direction on the sofa.

  “Newton, you're making me crazy,” he declared, knowing he was confessing more than just his words at this point.

  ***

  “Watch out, she shoots people.” Chad stood in the open doorway, his frame blocking any view of the hallway. Shane straightened them both up, but kept his arm around her.

  “You shoot people?” he asked, incredulous.

  Lucy grimaced when Shane looked to her for the truth.

  “One time.” She glared at Chad. “It's not something I tell people I've just met.”

  “I thought you said you didn't have secrets,” Shane countered with interest.

  “How can I, with my own personal herald following me around?” Lucy waved at Chad, who was giving her a weird look. She frowned at him, wondering what was going on, but then Sway and Blake came into the room, followed by the rest of the band.

  “Shane!” Sway's face lit up with surprise and Shane stood, giving each of the entering men a handshake. Luke got a full-on man-hug.

  Lucy hadn't realized that the show was over already, she had been talking to Shane the whole time. Pleasantries were being exchanged and Lucy found herself disappointed that she hadn't had more time with the snowboarding entrepreneur from southern California. She still had so many questions.

  “I'm glad you stuck around,” Blake said as he took Shane's vac
ated seat on the couch. Lucy felt guilt rip through her as she realized that Blake thought she'd been waiting in here for him. Truthfully, she probably would have been if Shane Brookings hadn't shown up and dominated her evening with his charm and witty banter. He had been the perfect distraction from her confused feelings for the tattooed rocker who still had more of a hold on her heart than she was comfortable with.

  Blake broke into her thoughts when he reached over and untangled her fingers from her bracelets. She looked up into his emerald eyes that were studying her far too closely.

  “What's going on, Lucky? Everything okay?” he muttered in a low voice, concern evident on his features. She swallowed, wishing she wouldn't complicate her life like this all the time. She wasn't smart enough for the situations she always ended up in.

  “Yeah, I'm fine.” She smiled sincerely at Blake and tried to clear her mind of her confusing thoughts. “Why'd you wanna see me?”

  He opened his mouth to answer, but Chad leaned over the back of the couch and stuck his face in between them.

  “Why do you call her Lucky? Where's that come from?” he asked, completely oblivious to his rude behavior.

  Blake chuckled and raised his eyebrows at Lucy. She shrugged slightly and looked away. It was a nickname he had given her when they were kids. He was the only one who ever used it because anytime someone else tried, he'd threaten to beat them up.

  “Because this girl was clumsy beyond reason, but completely fearless.” Blake touched the top of her hand as he spoke. Lucy flipped her hand palm up and he rested his hand on the top. “She fell off horses, fences, out of trees, even off the water tower a couple times, and never got hurt. And when she broke the rules, she either never got caught or never got in trouble.” He gave her a crooked grin and she returned it. Why did all of her best memories have to involve him? It made it really hard to move on.

  Chad squinted at the two of them. “Y'all having a moment or what?”

  Lucy smirked in irritation and pulled her hand away from Blake's. Chad “humphed” and walked away as Blake chuckled.

  “He really is the brother I never had,” she sighed, trying to downplay the reaction that Blake could invoke in her in an instant. Lucy looked back to Blake, seeing a peacefulness in his expression that hadn't been there in a long time. He looked like the young boy she used to know so well.

  “You were frickin' fantastic tonight, by the way.” He smiled at her, changing the subject easily.

  “Thanks.” She bit her bottom lip and smiled.

  “I wanted to ask you if you'd be interested in collaborating with me on a few new songs.” He looked hopeful. And excited. And sober. She could tell he had thought about this for a while.

  She took a deep breath, unable to hide her smile. “That sounds... kind of awesome,” she responded, loving the elation her words brought to his face.

  “We'll have to spend more time together,” he warned. “Think you can put up with me?”

  “I'll do my best.” She laughed at him as he clenched his fist in a victory pose.

  “Newton.” Shane stood in front of her, drawing her attention away from Blake. “I have to take off, but it was great getting to know you.”

  She gave him a smile. “You too, Brookings.”

  “What are my shoes doing in here?” Chad exclaimed, and Lucy grinned and winked at Shane, who laughed loudly.

  “Good to see you again too, Blake.” He shook the guitarist's hand and then tapped Lucy's nose. “See you around, kid.” He backed towards the door and gave a final wave to everyone in the room before departing.

  Kendra began waving people to their designated buses and Lucy shoved her feet back into Chad's shoes, intent on following orders. She didn't like Kendra today.

  “Can I please help you before you break your neck?” Blake asked beside her.

  “I'm fine.” Lucy tried to wave him off, but she tripped as she did so and would have smashed her face on the cement floor if Blake hadn't caught her and set her up right again.

  “Yeah, you're the definition of grace,” he said sarcastically as he bent down and removed the shoes from her feet. He tossed them to Chad on his way by and turned his back to Lucy.

  “Hop on.” He looked over his shoulder at her, indicating he wanted to give her a piggy-back ride.

  “Argh,” Lucy groaned, but did as she was told. She wrapped her arms around his neck and growled in his ear. “This is so demeaning.”

  “But you'll make it to the bus alive. I can't have my new writing partner die before any songs get written.” He yelped when she pinched his chest.

  “Is that all I am to you, a business asset?” she grumbled, half-joking.

  They made it to the bus and he set her down by the door and turned, backing her against the cool of the metal. She was frozen to her spot by the intensity in his face.

  “I know you were only kidding, but in case you really believe that, I need to correct you.” His green eyes blazed as he reached up to cup her cheek. “You know what you are to me, you're the only asset that matters.”

  Lucy couldn't breathe. Her body screamed at her to pull him to her, but her head was still in control. Thank God.

  He kissed her forehead and grinned. “I'll see you tomorrow.”

  He backed away, a bemused look on his face, then turned around and jogged to his own bus.

  Lucy took a shaky breath and put her hand to her forehead, closing her eyes. Her heart was a complete disaster. It was too hard for her to get it to follow any sort of direction. Blake always left her with that “caught in a rainstorm” feeling that she could never shake entirely.

  I am a wreck. Maybe I need therapy. Or a lobotomy.

  ***

  “I feel like we should discuss the presence of Shane Brookings after tonight's show.” Sway put his hands behind his head with a grim look.

  “What about it?” Blake asked as he stripped off his sweat-soaked shirt and put on the fresh one that Kendra handed to him. He saw the nervous look pass across her face at Sway's words.

  “Does he owe you money or something?” Mike chuckled from his seat in the main lounge.

  “No. I mean, he was kind of totally hitting on Lucy,” Sway clarified with a frown.

  “No, he wasn't,” Harrison protested, looking at Sway like he was being silly.

  Blake swallowed hard and looked back at Kendra, whose face was pinched and she wouldn't meet his eyes.

  “Trust me, I know the look. Shane definitely had the look,” Sway pressed on adamantly.

  “What look?” Blake asked cautiously. Harrison and Mike swiveled to face him, as if just registering what Sway was talking about.

  “The look. The one that says, I'm a complete sucker for this girl and I don't care who knows. Luke walked around with it the entire time he was pretending not to like Lenny. Am I really the only one who notices these things?”

  Blake shrugged one shoulder. “So? Lucy's awesome. It would be more weird if he didn't notice.”

  That caused wide eyes and complete silence. Blake chuckled lightly. “I know I was crazy about anyone being around her in the beginning, but I'm over that. I'm not gonna be all territorial with her. She's not mine.” Even if I'm still her's.

  “That's really big of you, Blake,” Mike acknowledged with a chin lift.

  “Yeah, very classy,” Harrison concurred.

  Sway scowled at him and folded his arms over his chest. “Really? You want us to believe that you're totally fine with Shane going after the one woman you've ever loved? The woman who makes you so out of your head crazy that half of your body is covered in ink as tribute to the pain she's caused you?”

  Blake returned his glare. “He was flirting with her. What's the big deal? He's not going after her. They'll probably never even see each other again.”

  Sway closed his eyes and shook his head. Blake turned to Kendra, whose lips were drawn in a hard line. He forced a short laugh.

  “You guys can relax. I'm fine. Shane is going halfway around t
he world tomorrow and Lucy and I are just friends. I'm not worried and you shouldn't be either.”

  Blake retreated to his bunk without bothering to wait for a response. He wasn't worried. Why should he be? He saw the way Lucy looked at him, the way her breath caught when he touched her. The look of complete desire on her face when he backed her against the side of the bus before saying goodnight.

  Shane who?

  Chapter 8

  Light Years

  When the touring schedule had been made, Harrison had taken it upon himself to make certain that the band got the rest they needed between major shows. He felt that without their former label breathing down their necks for ticket sales, they would be able to give their fans even better shows if they were properly rested. As a result, Harrison found himself with an open day going to a rock festival with his band, and they were not scheduled to perform. It was a nice change.

  “I'm not as into death metal as... the rest... of this... crowd...” he trailed off as he glanced around at the nearby concert goers, choosing his words carefully.

  “C'mon, Harry,” Lenny grabbed his arm with a smile, “where's your sense of adventure?”

  “Possibly back on the bus,” he said loudly as he allowed her to lead him through the sweaty, drunk mass of people.

  As they got closer to the stage, Harrison started to feel claustrophobic despite it being an outdoor festival.

  “So... which one is Mordrid?” he asked, trying to keep his elbows tucked close to his ribs so he wasn't bumping into people. It was a futile gesture.

  “Um.” Lenny stood up on her toes and narrowed her eyes at the performers on stage. “I think they're all Mordrid... collectively.”

  “Like when the Power Rangers combine to make the Mega Zord?”

  Lenny gave him a sideways smile and patted his back. “Yeah, Harry, kinda like that.”

  Mordrid the Destroyer was what had been listed on the bill. Harrison had voiced some curiosity in front of Lenny, something he hadn't yet learned to curb. She always seized an opportunity to try something new, and now Harrison found himself neck-deep in metal fans. And Lenny was getting closer to the pit.