Breathe

“Stop!” I scream as I press my eyes closed as hard as I can. “Can someone please tell me what's going on!”

  Brody steps forward and puts his hands on my shoulders. I slowly open my eyes and focus on him. “It's Kennedy. He's been shot.”

  Chapter Thirty-four

  The fucking irony of the statement doesn't even register to me. It would have been funny if it wasn't so real.

  But this can't be real. I must be having some kind of sick nightmare.

  All the air has left my body and I can't breathe. I'm struggling to catch any kind of breath possible. I grab my stomach and double over, falling to my knees. Daddy comes with me and I can feel Thomas' hands at my shoulders. My body continues to shake as I catch air little by little.

  I don't understand what is happening. He's just a boy.

  “Grace.” Someone is shaking my shoulders. “Grace. You need to pull it together. Linc has been asking for you.”

  I nod, but I'm unsure of what I should do or how I should act. This little boy, Linc's little boy, is hurt. I've come to love him. He's a part of my life now. I need to see him. I need to be with him to let him know I love him. What if something happens before I can tell him how much he means to me.

  He needs to be okay.

  He has to be okay.

  I lift my head as if I were moving in slow motion.

  “Where is he?”

  Brody takes my hand in his. “He's in the family room. I'll take you there.”

  He lifts me to my feet with help from Daddy and Thomas. We walk down the long hallway and stop in front of a room filled with drab colored furniture. A television is softly playing a “Seinfeld” rerun. Linc is the only one in the room. He’s sprawled out on a couch too small to fit his oversized body. One leg is stretched over the armrest while the other is bent at the knee, foot planted firmly on the ground. His head is against the other armrest with an arm thrown over his face and the other resting on his chest with his hand gripping the bill of his Yankee cap. He looks peaceful. I know he is anything but.

  Brody releases my hand and gives me a half smile. “You're the only person he wants to see right now. Take care of him.” He gives me a hug and walks back down the hall.

  Just breathe.

  I stand in the doorway, staring at the man I love. I don't know what happened but I do know that Linc will blame himself for this. I move slowly towards him trying not to make a sound as to not disturb his rest. I sit in a chair across from the couch he’s on and keep staring at him. He’s motionless except for the rise and fall of his chest. Thoughts of Linc and Kennedy invade my mind as I play with the lily charm. I think of all the times Kennedy has spent at the apartment watching movies, playing video games with Asher, going to hockey games. All he wants to do is spend time with his dad. That's all Linc wants for him too. We should move him to the City to stay with us permanently. He can attend Washford Academy, play any sport he chooses, play all the video games he wants with Asher and spend as much time as he wants with Linc. Family means everything to me. Linc means everything to me. If having Kennedy with him is what he needs then I want to give him that. He’s a wonderful boy and I would be happy to have him stay with us.

  My thoughts are interrupted by the sound of a throat clearing. I turn and look up and see a middle-aged doctor walking up to where I’m sitting. I stand to meet him.

  “Are you Kennedy Prescott's mother?” he asks in a hushed voice.

  A ping of jealousy runs through me.

  “No.” I reach out my hand to him. “I'm Grace Stratton. Linc's...” Umm. What am I?

  “Girlfriend,” Linc answers.

  He rises from the tiny couch and takes two long strides to reach my side. He puts an arm around my waist and kisses the top of my head. He holds his cap in his other hand and rubs his face.

  “I’m Dr. Schaffer.” He gives my hand a solid shake and nods.

  “How is Kennedy?” Linc asks.

  “Yes. Mr. Prescott.”

  “Linc. Please,” Linc interrupts.

  The doctor nods. “Of course. Linc, your son made it through surgery and is in recovery now. He will be transferred to his own room once he is stable. Thankfully the bullet was a through and through, meaning it entered his body and left his body. However, it did penetrate through the deltoid muscle but missed the shoulder joint and the socket. He is a lucky boy, Mr. Prescott.”

  After putting his cap firmly on his head, Linc reaches out for the doctor’s hand. Dr. Schaffer takes it. “Thank you, doctor.”

  “He's a strong boy. The nurse will be in after he has been transferred to a private room and then take you up to him.” With that said, he nods and leaves the room.

  Linc and I stand and stare at the doorway for a long moment. I'm still confused as to how this happened. But I'm ecstatic that he's going to be okay. If it had gone the other way, I don't know what Linc would have done.

  I'm not a religious person, but I do thank God for helping Kennedy pull through. With the surgery over we need to concentrate on helping him recover and heal. He'll need Linc now more than ever. We definitely need to move him in with us. Amy can help us watch over him until he is ready to start school again. We can transfer him for the spring semester.

  Linc turns to me and breaks me from my plan making. I look up and meet his eyes. He looks tired and stressed.

  He leans down and kisses me. This is not just any kiss. This kiss is full of love. This kiss is an apology. This kiss is us.

  He moves his hands to tangle in my hair and grasp the sides of my face below each ear. Holding me still, he devours me as if he can't get enough. He needs me. And frankly I need him, too.

  I lean my face back away from his and look up at him. He slowly opens his eyes and they meet mine.

  “Hi,” I say.

  I know. Lame. But I have no idea what to say to him right now.

  He forms a half smile. “Hi.” He kisses me on the forehead. “I've missed you. I shouldn't have walked out on you like I did. I just-”

  Placing a finger over his lips, “Don't. We both messed up, okay. We both assumed things and said things.” I pull away from him to give myself some space. I break our gaze and stare off towards the television. Suddenly Seinfeld looks very interesting to me. After a long pregnant pause, I speak, again. “Thank you for the lilies. They're beautiful.”

  “I meant what I said in the note. They represent every moment I've had you on my mind.” He lets out a small laugh. “Actually, they didn't have enough lilies in the City to cover the amount of moments I've had you on my mind. But you get the point.”

  He takes a step towards me. “How did this happen to Kennedy, Linc? I just don't understand why or how he got shot.”

  He reaches his hand out to me and I take it. After guiding me over to the couch he was resting on, we sit and face each other. “Miles and I had gone out to Jersey to pick him up. I wanted to bring him back to the apartment with me to see you. I figured with his help, I could show you that I still love you. He was my secret weapon of sorts.” He snickers while shaking his head. A moment later his face returns to serious. “We made a stop at the gym so I could pick something up. When we stepped out the back door...” Tears form in his eyes and his face drops. Replaying the scene must be eating him up inside.

  “You don't have to tell me right now. We can talk about it later.”

  “No. You should know.” He takes a deep breath. “We walked out the door into the parking lot. Miles first, Kennedy slightly behind him and me lagging behind. We heard a gunshot and Miles turned to cover my boy. Before I knew what was happening, he was falling to the ground with Miles' arm wrapped around him. I lunged for him and caught him before he hit the pavement. Another shot or two sounded. Neither of us knew if we were hit or not, but I knew Kennedy was. I pulled him into my lap as blood started to show from his upper arm. Miles got up and started running around the parking lot with his gun drawn trying to see if he could locate the shooter. He couldn't.” He lowers his head again. “He called 911 a
nd here we are.”

  He rubs his hands over his face and sighs. “I could have lost him, Grace. Miles got nicked in the forearm protecting him. I didn't protect him. Miles did. What kind of dad am I? He's the only thing I have that is part of me. I could have lost my boy.”

  I grab his hands and hold them in my lap. “But you didn't lose him. He's still with us. He's going to be okay.”

  “But-”

  “No.” I shake my head back and forth. “He's going to be okay.”

  We stare at each other for a few moments.

  “I think he should come and stay with us while he recovers. Maybe permanently.”

  “You want him to live with us?”

  I nod. “I think it's best. That way he’s closer to you and you won't have to travel out to Jersey all the time to see him. Amy can help me care for him. I can work from home or not at all for that matter. And Asher will be around to keep him occupied.”

  “You would be okay with this? And you'd stay at home with him?”

  “Linc, I wouldn't have offered if I didn't want it. It’ll make things easier for you and Kennedy. Why are you even questioning this?”

  “It's just...I don't know.” He pulls me into an embrace placing his cheek on the top of my head and speaks into my hair. He sighs. “I think I love you more now. If that's even possible.”

  He gets me to giggle. How is that? In the middle of something awful, he gets me to freaking giggle.

  What a man.

  He turns and lifts my chin with one of his hands and leans in for a kiss. It's a light kiss. Lips only. I think he's hesitant to go any further. We still haven't talked about last night. He presses two more delightfully gentle kisses on my lips and pulls away.

  “I don't just think it. I know it.”

  His random thinking is confusing. “Huh?”

  “I don't just think I love you more. I know I love you more. If that's even possible seeing as I love you more than my life.”

  He pushes his lips to mine again, pressing deeper. My head falls back from the force but he catches it behind my neck with one of his giant paws.

  I lean back and stare into his gorgeous eyes. They look different. They search mine for something. I can't even imagine what that could be. As I begin to breathe steadily and collect myself, Linc turns and digs around in the pockets of his jacket that is thrown across the back of the small couch. I begin to stand to go into the kitchen area for a drink of water when he grabs my hand.

  “Grace?” My name comes out as a nervous whisper.

  “Yeah?” I question back.

  “I know that this has been a tough day for you. Hell, the last few days have been a shit storm for you. I caused that and I truly apologize for all of it. I acted out of impulse by leaving for Boston and jealousy by assuming the worst with you and Patrick. I can't say that it won't happen again. But I can tell you now that I will devote the rest of my life to try my hardest to make you the happiest you’ve ever been.” He opens the hand not holding mine and bends to his knee. Just one knee. “I can't promise you roses, but I can promise you lilies.”

  Oh, God. He's on one knee.

  “Grace Evelyn Stratton. I know our relationship happened fast. I know that we still have some stuff to sort out. But what I want is to make you feel wanted. I want to make you happy. I want to make you proud of me. I want you to help me raise my son. I want you to have more children with me. I want you to let me protect you. I want you to love me for the rest of my life. I just want you. All of you.”

  All I can focus on is that the small box says Cartier across the top. He gently lets my hand go and it falls limply to my side. He opens the box and reveals the most perfect ring I have ever seen. It's a light pink, cushion shape diamond surrounded by several small crystal-clear ones. The platinum band is covered in the same small diamonds as well.

  It's pink. It's perfect. It's me.

  “If I promise to love you the best that I can, will you promise to love me forever?”

  Tears well up and fill my eyes. I wipe a few with my thumb. My other hand covers my mouth to try and hold back the loud cry that is about to be released. He reaches for my left hand and I let him take it.

  “Will you marry me, Grace?”

  I gasp as all the air leaves my lungs.

  “Holy shit.”

  Did I just say that? I don't think I just said that. That was definitely a man's voice.

  “Gracie, answer the man.” I look up and see Rafe standing in the doorway with a nurse.

  I look back down to Linc, who looks like he’s about to throw up. “Maybe we should finish this later,” I whisper to him.

  His shoulders slug forward as if I just punched him in the gut. Well, I suppose I just did.

  He nods, closes the box and stands. “I understand.”

  “Linc, I didn't say no.”

  “You didn't say yes,” he whispers back.

  “I just think that we should focus on Kennedy right now.” I grab for his hand and thread my fingers through his. “At least for today. Please just give me a little time.” I push up on my toes and kiss him on the lips. He responds, but not as he has before. I really have sucker punched him.

  I’m a bitch.

  “Mr. Prescott, your son has been moved to his own room. He just woke up moments ago and is asking for you. Follow me and I'll take you.”

  He nods and we follow her out of the room, passing Rafe on the way. Linc nods to him and he does the same back. Rafe squeezes my arm and gives me a half smile. “What the hell?” He mouths to me.

  I give my own weird smile back to him and we move along to go see Linc's little boy.

  We make the trek in silence. Once we reach his door, Linc pulls my hand up to his lips and kisses the knuckle. “I love you, Grace.” He flips my hand over and kisses the palm. “And I'll wait. I'll wait as long as I have to. Just don't stop loving me.” He kisses my wrist. “Promise me, you won't stop loving me.”

  I give him a smile. “I promise.”

  Chapter Thirty-five

  Two things happen when we enter Kennedy’s room.

  One: The boy in the bed smiles so widely that I think he may break his face. Which in turn makes his father's smile larger.

  Two: I die a little inside. Even though this child is smiling and looks genuinely happy, I’m about to have a breakdown.

  Linc pulls me to Kennedy's bedside with him. He drops my hand and leans over his son to give him a hug. It's awkward with all of the wires and things that are attached to him, but neither one seems to care.

  Then a third thing happens: they both start crying.

  I'm not sure how to handle all of this. These two people who mean the world to each other were almost torn apart. I slink back and sit on the couch in front of the window. They need each other and I'm just in the way.

  “You had me so worried, little man,” Linc whispers.

  “Sorry, dad.”

  “Nothing to be sorry about. None of this is your fault.” He kisses him on the head. “Nothing.”

  Kennedy nods and wipes tears from his face with his palms.

  “Is Grace here?”

  I stand and walk to the other side of his bed. “I'm here.”

  He grabs for my hand. “Can I... can I have a hug?”

  “Of course, you can.” I lean in and wrap my arms around his shoulders the best I can. I'm uncomfortable, but I don't care. He begins to shake in my arms. I try to pull back to look at him, but he isn't letting go. His sobs are so heavy, it's alarming.

  “Please don't leave him,” he whispers in my ear. “Don't leave us.”

  I rear back in shock. “What?”

  He gives me a shy smile through his tears. He looks just like Linc. Looking over at his dad, he asks, “Did you ask her yet?”

  Linc's face drops. “Why don't you close your eyes and rest for a little bit. You need to get your strength back. Grace and I will hang over there while you sleep.”

  Kennedy nods, again. “Yeah. Okay.” He stiff
ly shifts his body to get a bit more comfortable. He tilts his head to the side to face me, smiles, and closes his eyes. I lean in and kiss his forehead while I stroke his hair. His breathing starts to even out and slow to a relaxed pace. I know he's almost asleep.

  “He loves you, you know.”

  I look up at Linc who’s moved to the small couch. I nod, not really knowing what to say.

  Linc opens his giant arms. “Come here.”

  I obey. He pulls me into his lap and I squirm around until I find my comfy spot.

  “We need to finish our conversation.”

  “I know. But can we do it later?”

  “You can't avoid it, Grace. We will talk about it and you will answer me.” He nuzzles into my neck and kisses me on the sweet spot just below my ear.

  I pull away from him and stand. “I'm going to go and let everyone know what's happening. I'll be back in a bit.”

  Without looking at Linc and without looking back I hightail it out of the room and down to the first floor waiting area. Everyone, and I do mean everyone, is sitting around in small groups talking or on their phones or tapping away on their Pads. I spot Rafe sitting with Olive and Brody and make my way over to him.

  He sees me approaching and stands. “Hey, Gracie.”

  I wrap myself around him and hold on tight.

  “Hey.” I bury my face in his chest and cry as he runs his hands through my hair. “Let's take a walk.”

  We lace our fingers together and start to leisurely walk around inside the hospital.

  “So, tell me what the hell happened back in that room.”

  “I'm not sure. It all happened so fast. I mean, just yesterday we were fighting and getting everything out in the open. I thought I’d screwed up so bad that it was the beginning of the end. Then the flowers. God, the lilies were so beautiful and the note he wrote was amazing.” My already tired eyes start to glaze over and tears build behind them. “There were just too many emotions running through me that I couldn't think straight.”

  “What do you think you'll do? I mean, do you love him enough to want to be his wife?”

  “I do love him. But I...”