Regrets (Follow Your Heart Book 2)

by Caragh Bell

  She ignored him. ‘I’m sorry, Luca, I’m sorry.’

  He held her close and let her cry. What did she mean sorry? Sorry for breaking his heart? That made him look like such a schmuck. There was no way he was going to be that guy. Call it man-pride or something. There was no way he was letting her see how badly she had hurt him.

  ‘Will you cut it out? I’m serious, Lyd. It’s all cool. We’re cool.’ His blue eyes were warm. ‘Sure, I was mad at you, but none of that matters anymore. We’ve moved on.’

  She sat up straight and rubbed her nose. ‘We’ve moved on,’ she repeated.

  ‘Sure,’ he said, tilting her chin with his finger. ‘What we had was great but it’s a memory now.’ He stared deeply into her eyes. ‘Right?’ he added, waiting for her response.

  She stared at him for a moment, her heart pounding in her chest.

  ‘Right.’

  ‘You must have heard that I’m getting married.’

  She nodded, her chest heaving.

  ‘Are you seeing someone?’ he asked guardedly.

  She nodded again.

  His face fell for a moment but then regained its cheery expression. ‘So, it’s all good.’

  She forced a smile. ‘It’s all good.’

  His blues eyes regarded her with a funny expression. She couldn’t quite interpret what he was thinking.

  ‘So, could you find my phone?’ she continued brightly. ‘It’s probably in my bag. I don’t feel strong enough to walk.’

  The moment was over. The barriers had gone up. There was no way she was going to be a desperate crying wreck, begging him to take her back. He seemed happy; who was she to mess with that? They could now face the wedding without any baggage. She would meet his fiancée and be genuine. The air had been cleared.

  ‘Can you find my phone?’ she repeated. ‘I’ll ring my mum and she’ll come and get me. You can go if you like.’

  ‘So, we’re cool?’ he reiterated, his blue eyes serious.

  She nodded and forced a smile. ‘Of course, why wouldn’t we be?’

  He couldn’t read her expression.

  ‘I’ll just get your cell.’ He backed away. ‘Then, I guess I’ll head back to the hotel. My flight is tonight.’

  ‘Thanks,’ she said politely. ‘Thanks a million.’

  Colin and Helen arrived together.

  ‘What the hell happened?’ Colin catapulted himself on her, kissing her over and over. ‘I leave you out of my sight for a minute and you get beaten up?’

  Lydia winced as he squeezed her tightly. ‘I’m a bit bruised, Col. Be careful.’

  ‘Darling,’ crooned Helen, pulling her close. ‘What were you thinking? You should have stayed with Colin.’

  ‘Look, Mum, three’s a crowd. Val and Colin certainly didn’t want me on the scene.’

  ‘Oh no, Lyd,’ said Colin, ‘there was no action at all. I was way too drunk. You could have stayed, no problem.’

  Helen and Lydia stared at him in disbelief.

  ‘Too much information, Col.’ Lydia made a face.

  She lay back on the bed, gingerly propping herself against the pillows. The nurse had told her that she had to stay until the evening rounds. The doctor would examine her then and decide whether she would be released or not. She couldn’t wait to go home. She dreamed of her bed and its softness. The hospital bed was hard and uninviting.

  Helen sat on the edge of the bed and took Lydia’s hand in hers. ‘I’ll take you home with me today.’

  ‘No!’

  ‘I insist.’ She regarded her sternly. ‘You’ll have to call in sick. That will be fine, won’t it, Colin?’

  Colin was texting furiously. ‘I’m just telling Adam now. We could look at this angle for a story.’

  ‘Not now.’ Lydia glared at him.

  ‘Who brought you here?’ asked her mother. ‘Was it a stranger?’

  She hesitated. Luca was not a popular name in her house since the Dominic thing.

  ‘Um, it was Luca, you know, Craig’s best man,’ she said eventually in a small voice.

  ‘That American?’ asked Helen sharply.

  She nodded wordlessly. Colin had stopped texting as soon as she said his name.

  ‘How did he find you?’ he asked.

  ‘I don’t know,’ she answered simply. ‘He hit my attacker and called the ambulance, apparently. I was only semi-conscious at that stage.’

  ‘Where is he now?’ Helen’s face was in a grim line. ‘Did he just drop you here and run?’

  Lydia shifted uncomfortably in the bed. ‘No, he didn’t take off or anything. He stayed until I woke up.’

  ‘Stayed? Why did they allow him?’ asked Helen sharply. ‘He’s not family.’

  ‘Mum! Leave it.’ Lydia closed her eyes and groaned inwardly. She should never have mentioned his name. Her mother attributed all the fall-out from her and Dominic’s break-up to him. She blamed Luca entirely for leading her daughter astray.

  ‘I sent him away. He needed to get ready for his flight this evening.’

  ‘I want to hear everything,’ demanded Colin. ‘You have my full attention.’

  ‘There’s nothing to tell.’ She glared at him again. Her mother did not need to know any more about the situation.

  Anyway, there was nothing to tell. He had moved on. End of story. She had missed that boat. Now all she had to do was get through the wedding and then she could forget about him completely.

  Luca watched Ty’s mouth open and close as he snored. He had fallen asleep almost instantaneously after they boarded the plane. The weekend had taken it out of him.

  Luca was exhausted too. Hell, he had barely slept in that hospital bed. For some reason, he couldn’t sleep now. His brain was racing and he could still smell her perfume on his jacket.

  As he watched her sleeping, he felt all the old feelings washing over him. Then, he had quelled them completely. He had Charlotte to think about. Plus, he would never let her in again.

  His expression hardened. Never again.

  Closing his eyes, he prayed that sleep would take over. He had a big week at work and he needed his energy. Plus Charlotte had texted, telling him that his social calendar was full for the next couple of weeks. Two of her friends were engaged and were having a party; another one was hitting thirty and was throwing a big dinner party downtown.

  It’s not that he didn’t like her friends; they were cool and interesting. It’s just they were all attorneys and whenever they got together they would talk shop. He smiled and played along, but it bored him senseless. Charlotte, however, didn’t get his friends at all. She thought Ty cursed too much and was vulgar. The only ones she found passable were Craig and Sam. They had spent Halloween together last year. She and Sam had become friends immediately; they were both strong-minded and bright with sensible heads on their shoulders. They had ice-skated together at the Rockefeller and had pizza downtown. Craig had been delighted; he had even suggested a skiing trip next winter when all the wedding madness had passed.

  Lydia’s image drifted easily into his mind and, as he was so tired, he didn’t fight it. He could still dream about her, there was no cheating in that. Just because he was getting married didn’t mean that he was dead.

  He lay back on the headrest and closed his eyes. He fell asleep instantly, comforted by her soothing presence. Images flashed through his mind as he slept and he drifted between dreams and reality.

  He was back by their tree by the river. She was there, laughing. He could hear her voice and could see her lips moving as she spoke. She was telling him that she loved him. She was telling him that she was waiting for him…

  Chapter 23

  Lydia was discharged eventually and Helen took her home to West Cork. Adam texted, telling her to take all the time that she needed. The office had been horrified at the news of her attack.

  It was two days later and she was resting in her bedroom. Suddenly the door opened and Colin barged in, laden down with flowers, Maltesers, the latest edition of
Cosmo and Love Actually on DVD. He dumped his goods on the bottom of her bed and kissed her cheek.

  ‘Now, dish it,’ he commanded, towering over her with his hands on his hips.

  ‘Dish what?’ Lydia didn’t meet his eyes.

  ‘What the hell happened? Why was Luca there? How did he know where you were?’

  ‘I don’t know,’ she answered simply. ‘He must have seen it happen.’

  ‘Were things weird between you?’ he asked, opening the Maltesers and popping three in his mouth at once. ‘Like, he must have been cross with you.’

  She shook her head. ‘No, he wasn’t cross. Quite the opposite, in fact. It was strange.’

  ‘I suppose he’s getting married soon.’

  The words knifed her heart. ‘I suppose. We didn’t talk much.’

  She flicked open the magazine but the words were swimming in front of her eyes. Luca was getting married to someone else. He was no longer available. Any fantasy she had entertained about their first meeting had been replaced with an unexciting normality. Sure there was a spark – there would always be a spark – but he was different now. He had changed. She sensed that the old carefree Luca had matured. He was in love with someone else and was looking forward to a new life.

  She had missed her chance.

  ‘Do you still fancy him?’ Colin’s eyes were shrewd. ‘Was there any frisson between you at all?’

  She shrugged. ‘Of course there was something, but that’s all over now.’

  ‘Are you upset?’

  She looked away. ‘No, I’m not. We don’t belong together, it’s quite obvious.’ She steeled herself against the pain. ‘He seems pretty happy with his fiancée anyway.’

  ‘Maybe it’s for the best.’ He grabbed another fistful of Maltesers.

  ‘Oh, it is, it is.’ She plastered a smile on her face. ‘Anyway, Mathis is coming here next week for the wedding. He’s taking two weeks off.’

  ‘Oh la la!’ Colin brightened. ‘I’m looking forward to meeting him.’

  ‘You’ll really like him. His accent is to die for.’ She rested her head on her pillow. ‘Now, go away, I’m tired. And stop eating my chocolate!’

  He stared in horror at the near-empty bag. ‘Did I eat all of those? Oh Jesus! Skye will kill me. He’s starting Zumba with me at the gym on Thursday.’

  ‘A moment on the lips, Col.’

  ‘A lifetime on the hips,’ he finished, looking stricken. He patted his stomach dolefully.

  ‘Oh, get over it, you’re like a model.’ She snuggled under her blankets. ‘Tell Mum I’ll be down for dinner.’

  Samantha checked Facebook on her phone. There was a private message from Charlotte. She was relieved about that; any public communication would be noticed by Lydia.

  Why do I feel like I’m cheating on my best friend?

  It was an upbeat message, asking her about her plans and if she had much left to sort out before the big day. She and Luca were planning to fly in two days before; she hoped that was okay. They were going to stay in Hayfield Manor until the day after the wedding. Then they had to come back, as it was her friend’s thirtieth birthday and there was a party for her downtown. Tara and Christian were definitely not going to make it. She had an important opening night that she couldn’t get out of and he was too busy at work. They would send a gift with Luca and were all apologies.

  Samantha replied immediately telling her that her plans sounded perfect and she was heading away on honeymoon the day after the wedding so it made no difference whether they left or not.

  Craig had booked a five-star hotel in Positano, a tiny village nestled along the Amalfi coast. She couldn’t wait to jet off and drink cocktails by the pool. The wedding, although very well organised, was still a strain. Little things kept cropping up that needed to be done. Lydia and Colin had been amazing. One day, the violinist from the string quartet rang and said he had been double-booked. Her heart in her mouth, she had called Colin. He made a phone call and sorted the whole mess out instantly. She’s not quite sure how he did it, but he did.

  Lydia was calling over for a dress fitting later. It was only three weeks to the big day. The exams were about to start at school and the staff were on a wind-down. She had already packed her suitcase for her honeymoon and loved going through it, adding bits and pieces.

  Packing for a holiday is the best part,she reflected idly.

  Her father was writing and rewriting his speech. He was so nervous about it. Craig was also dreading speaking in public. She didn’t get that, being a teacher. She spoke like that on a daily basis.

  Would she, the bride, make a speech? It was the new craze; privately, she thought it was a bit de trop. The speeches tended to go on and on anyway without an extra voice.

  Walking into the spare room of their flat, she fingered the material of her dress which was draped elegantly on a mannequin. The skirt was billowed out and the train lay on a white sheet for protection. It looked so beautiful; she couldn’t wait to wear it and enjoy it. She had imagined it over and over in her mind. Walking up the aisle with her dad, seeing Craig in his suit, lighting the candles, the music, the vows …

  She hugged herself in delight. Only three weeks to go. Only three weeks to the greatest day of her life.

  Mimi dabbed some rouge on her cheeks. Her skin was bordering on papery due to her age, but she still made the best of what she had. French women always looked their best; it was expected.

  A dinner had been organised for Christian’s birthday. The du Mauriers had been invited as the wedding was so close. Tara wanted them all to get to know each other better. Privately, Mimi wasn’t that interested. She liked Charlotte but there was something bland about her. Bien sûr, she was beautiful, intelligente and perfect wife material, but there was something not quite right.

  Was she being an overprotective grandmother? Would any girl be good enough for her petit Luca? She paused and scrutinised her reflection in the mirror.

  Perhaps not.

  Still, when he had called and asked her to attend the dinner, she had accepted. He was her boy and she would do anything for him. She would smile and nod and behave impeccably. Just like she had done all her life.

  Jacques was due to pick her up in five minutes. She picked up her fur stole, but then decided against it. It was far too hot to wear mink. Instead, she retrieved a cashmere cape from her ancient wardrobe and draped it elegantly around her shoulders. It flowed elegantly down her back and matched her gold dress perfectly.

  Time to go.

  She picked up her Chanel bag and vacated the apartment.

  ‘Mimi!’ Luca called from across the room. ‘You made it! Come and sit here – I saved you a seat by me.’

  She floated over to the table and nodded in greeting to its occupants.

  ‘T’es belle, maman,’ said Christian, kissing her hand. ‘You look beautiful.’

  ‘Merci,’ she answered, smiling.

  Luca pulled her seat out and she sat down gracefully.

  ‘Good to see you, Marcheline,’ called Frank du Maurier from across the table. ‘I hear the steak is good here.’

  Mimi nodded in greeting but said nothing. She found Frank loud and opinionated. Henri had been an attorney but not once had he ever raised his voice in public. He was always refined, always in control. She tried and failed to imagine him at this dinner table.

  Christian snapped his menu shut. ‘I know what I’d like,’ he announced. ‘Maman, they have foie gras. Are you tempted?’

  She scanned the menu. ‘Peut-être. Maybe.’

  Luca filed her glass with wine. ‘So, Mimi, my bachelor party was last weekend.’

  ‘Ah, bon?’

  ‘It was a blast. Ty organised strippers and beer. We went to the casino and I won on the roulette.’

  Mimi grimaced at the thought of it. Strippers? Looking at Victoria du Maurier’s face, she could see that she was equally horrified.

  Charlotte put her hand on Luca’s arm. ‘You behaved yourself, I hope.’<
br />
  ‘Sure I did,’ he reiterated. ‘Why would I mess around when I have you?’ He stared at his father as he spoke, emphasising every word. It wasn’t lost on Christian, who scowled.

  Will that boy ever forget? he thought.

  ‘I ’ave nevair been to Las Vegas,’ said Mimi, nibbling on a piece of bread. ‘I do not theenk I would like eet.’

  ‘Oh, sure you would,’ protested Luca. ‘It’s a crazy place, Meems. Full of colour and lights. I’m sure glad we only had a weekend there. It took me like a week to get over it.’

  ‘Are you having a bachelorette, Charlotte?’ asked Tara pleasantly. ‘Any plans?’

  Charlotte flicked her honey-blonde hair. ‘Sure. Sophia has organised a trip to Disney World in Florida. I’m obsessed with Minnie Mouse.’

  There was a pause.

  Mimi groaned inwardly. Bland, she thought.

  ‘Disney sounds great,’ said Christian supportively. ‘You guys should make the most of it.’ He smiled broadly at her.

  Mimi observed her son with shrewd eyes. His admiration for Charlotte was plain; she hoped he would keep it in check. She glanced at Luca, who seemed oblivious to it all.

  It was no secret that Christian liked the ladies. She had heard the gossip and the rumours and had chosen to ignore it. Tara was not a good choice for her son; anyone could see that. Even in his early fifties, he cut a dashing figure with his sallow skin and dark eyes, topped with slightly greying hair. His body remained fit and athletic, thanks to the hours spent in the pool and in the gym. He had always effortlessly attracted the opposite sex and, sometimes, much to her chagrin, he had acted on it.