Candy Boys

by Raven, Jo

  Beeping monitors, a tube going into Jet’s chest to empty the blood from his lung, another going into his hand transporting blood from a plastic bag—bandages, bruises, an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose.

  His dark ink peeking from the pale blue gown he’s dressed in, winding down his biceps, curling up his collarbone.

  And Jet’s pale face resting on the pillow, his jaw swollen.

  I don’t know what to do with myself. I’ve never been so terrified in my whole damn life. Finding out Jet was in danger sure put everything in perspective. Imagining the future without him, and without Candy, was a suckerpunch to the chest.

  Candy is stroking Jet’s hair, and I want to do the same, but instead I shove my hands into my pockets and stand there, looking on.

  My blood is rushing too fast in my veins. My pulse is racing. I’m filled with restless anger at everything and everyone that hurt Jet. I want to punch a hole through the wall of the hospital. I want to kill his crazy father.

  I shift restlessly from foot to foot.

  Then Jet’s lashes lift. He murmurs something, and Candy lifts the mask off his face. She kisses his mouth, a soft, quick kiss, strokes his hair off his brow.

  He gives her a small, groggy smile, then painfully turns his head, as if looking for something, or someone. One eye can barely open, but that doesn’t stop him.

  My chest feels too small. I rub a hand over it as he scans his surroundings. His gaze lands on me, and even drugged to the gills, he smiles for me.

  Oh, to hell with this. I approach the bed in two swift strides and sink down on the hard mattress, careful not to jostle him too much, then I put my hand on his face and kiss him full on the lips.

  Shock is written all over his face when I lift my head. “J.”

  His voice is hoarse and rough like sandpaper, but it’s the best sound in the world.

  “I’m so sorry I ran. I’m never running again, Jet. I promise you that.” I push the hair from his eyes, trace the bruises. “I’m done with running. I’m staying with you and Candy.” Sudden doubt assaults me. “If you still want me to stick around.”

  “Yes.” He swallows, licks his dry lips, his eyes warm and wet. “Idiot.”

  I laugh, my eyes stinging. I can’t remember the last time I cried. Must have been a kid. The wetness on my cheeks is disconcerting. “I love you, Jet.”

  “Me too,” he whispers, and I’m startled to find tears on his cheeks, too.

  “You…” I don’t know what to do with all these feelings, dammit. “Don’t ever fucking scare me like that again, or I’ll string you up by your balls, you hear me?”

  Candy snorts, and I gesture for her to come to me. She walks around the bed, and I pull her in front of me, between myself and Jet.

  “Tell him,” I say, wrapping an arm around her middle, kissing her neck. “Tell him.”

  “We love you, Jet,” she whispers. “So much.”

  His throat works. “I…” He obviously can’t find a reply to that.

  “Sh.” She puts a finger to his lips. “It’s okay.”

  “I left the store,” he rasps. “Without you. I told Donna.”

  “Told her what?” I ask, baffled.

  “That he never finished school,” Candy replies for him. “That’s why you left? I thought… Never mind what I thought. Oh, Jet…”

  “Explain.” I frown at them.

  “We lied to her about it. I’ll talk to her, Jet.” She strokes his cheek. “Don’t worry about that. I’ll explain. She’ll take you back. Focus on getting well, and everything will be okay.”

  He says nothing, and after a moment he dozes off, his face going slack.

  Candy adjusts the covers over his chest. “We should let him sleep,” she says, her voice hushed and wavering.

  I tug her to her feet, enfold her in my arms and we go out, leaning against each other, leaving a part of ourselves on that bed. Leaving him alone.

  But only for a short while, that I swear.

  ***

  “What are you thinking?” I ask her as we step outside the hospital for a breath of fresh air. She’s very quiet.

  Then again, she looks exhausted. Just like I feel.

  “I’m thinking that the world is a crazy place.”

  I nod. No shit.

  “And that it’s weird after all these years wanting you guys to really be with you.”

  “That’s weird.” I grin at her, hug her more tightly to my side. “So you were lusting after me from a distance at college?”

  “Sometimes from even closer. You just never noticed me.”

  “I was an idiot. Even Jet said so.”

  “Well, if Jet said it, who am I to argue?” She sticks her tongue out.

  It makes me laugh. “Move in with us,” I tell her.

  She gives me a startled look. “J…”

  “We’ll get a bigger couch. And a huge bed.”

  “How huge?”

  “The biggest they have.”

  “Tempting.”

  “That we are.”

  She smiles at me, soft and warm. “Yeah, you are. I’d love to, J.”

  I kiss her cheek and lead her to a bench. It’s a pretty cold night for August. She shivers, and I rub her back. “You’ve been helping Jet with his studying, right? To get his GED. Is he having trouble?”

  “With the reading and writing part. I was going to ask you if you knew about this. I think he may be dyslexic. He may also have a bit of ADHD”

  I freeze. “Really?”

  “I asked my doctor about it, and she thinks it’s possible. You don’t think so?”

  “I never thought about it. Didn’t even know he had specific difficulties.”

  “I was going to take him to a specialist. He can get help, and they could help him get his GED, too.”

  I hang my head. “I failed him, didn’t I?”

  “Not if he never told you about it.” She elbows me lightly in the ribs. “Hey, none of that. He would have told you eventually. He was sort of forced into telling me because of the bookstore.”

  “I don’t know.” I hug her so hard I’m not sure she can still breathe. “What I know is that you’re good for us. And we can’t live without you.”

  “That’s a bit too soon to say,” she giggles, struggling to get free from my starfish-hug. “We’ve only been together a few weeks.”

  “But we fit,” I say, because I feel it in my chest, in my bones. “Like we were made of each other.”

  Like we were meant to be.

  “That’s true,” she says after a moment and snuggles in my arms, smiling again. “And don’t forget I knew it first.”

  ***

  Watching the doctors prod and poke Jet has my hackles up, and it’s only because Candy is practically holding me back I haven’t yanked them away from him and demanded they be more careful.

  “It’s okay,” Candy whispers, pressing a hand to my middle, as if sensing everything going on inside my head. “They’re helping him, J. Don’t worry.”

  I could have lost this. Lost him. I’d have given it up. Given them up, and for what?

  My parents who are bigots and never cared about what I want. And a job I don’t even know if I like, my first job—just a step in a career I still haven’t figured out. I don’t know what kind of job I would like yet—but I do know I want these two people in my life, and I’d do anything to be with them.

  “J,” Jet rasps and I jerk forward, dragging Candy with me.

  “What is it?”

  “When can I leave?”

  Candy makes a tiny sound of distress. “Not yet, baby.”

  “He has to stay a few days. He’s lost a lot of blood,” the doctor says, frowning.

  “J,” he says again, and it’s a blow to my heart.

  All I want is to take him home.

  “They want to keep you a bit longer,” I say, hating the disappointment in his eyes. “But soon we’re taking you away from here.”

  “Okay.” His hands are t
rembling on top of the sheets. I take them in mine and squeeze them.

  “We will be here,” I tell him. I hold his gaze, see it clear a little. “We’re not leaving you here on your own.”

  Candy nods and goes around the bed to sit on the other side of him. “Can’t get rid of us. We’re here to stay.”

  His eyes flick from her to me and back. It’s painful to see how relieved he looks. That’s what bothered him? Maybe he’s afraid to be alone after the attack. I wouldn’t blame him.

  All the nightmares from these past years, they all make sense now. What a burden to bear alone. But now…

  “You’re not alone anymore.” I stare at him until he bites his lip and his eyes fill up again. “Never again. Candy and I… we need you, Jet. More than anything in the world. You know that, right?”

  “You mean everything to us,” Candy adds, and we lean over the bed, mindful of the tube and bandages, and wrap him up in the cocoon of our bodies.

  He’s ours, and we’ll keep him safe.

  Chapter Thirty Three

  JETHRO

  He’s stabbing me, again and again, the knife flashing, rising and falling. There are bodies lying all around me. My mother, my uncle.

  Joel. Candy.

  Panic jerks me out of sleep, and then the pain in my chest hits, and I panic some more. There’s nobody beside me, no sound except my gasping breaths.

  Is it over? Where’s Candy and Joel? Are they alive?

  By the time the nurse does her rounds, I’ve calmed down. She doesn’t ask me why I’m awake in the middle of the night. I guess it’s normal if you’re in the hospital. Who the hell knows?

  It’s not until they come back inside the next morning that I relax enough to sleep again.

  The policeman sitting beside my bed is clearly uncomfortable. He’s wiping sweat from his brow again, shifting in the plastic chair they brought in for him, trying not to stare at the bruises and bandages covering me.

  Heh, good luck with that. I’d stare if it were me in that chair. I bet I look spectacular. I’m beaten up, stabbed and stitched back together like a ragdoll. I feel like one, too—disjointed, broken, tattered.

  Who would want someone like me, huh?

  But then I have to shake my head, because I remember that Joel and Candy do, and I smile in spite of the pain in my jaw.

  “Are you awake, Mr. Connors?” He leans forward, having noticed my eyes are now open.

  Which means I can’t put this off any longer.

  Shit.

  “I’m awake,” I croak.

  He winces at the sound of my voice, but hey, not my fault hospital air is so dry and that I’ve just been stabbed half to death, right?

  “I would like to talk to you about your father,” he says, and his words echo in my ears.

  Talk to you about your father…

  “You caught him?” I say, a shot in the dark, and I’m shocked when he actually nods. “You did? You serious?”

  “Yes. We caught him a few blocks away from the alley where he, um, where he stabbed you.”

  Holy fucking shit. Can’t believe it. My father was a ghost for five years, a vengeful ghost haunting my sleep. Nobody but me believed he was still alive. He’d been missing for too long.

  Now they have no choice but to believe me, and the thought brings me no satisfaction whatsoever.

  I stare at the policeman through my one good eye. “What will you do with him?”

  He’s flustered again. “He’s in jail. He’ll be taken to trial and most probably spend a long time in prison.”

  Right. “He won’t be released any time soon, right?”

  “Released?” He opens his mouth, closes it. Tries again. “He tried to kill you. He was seen by witnesses. The knife he stabbed you with is covered in his fingerprints. He’s going to prison.”

  Oh good. I close my eyes, so relieved I could cry, but my eyes are dry. It’s okay. My father can’t go after anyone else I care for—Joel or Candy. That’s all that matters.

  “Do you know why he did it?” the policeman asks me. He’s a detective, most probably. I didn’t even catch his name. Did he even say it? “Your father. Why he came after you.”

  I blink. Shit, it’s a long story, and I’m so tired. Not sure I can do this now. He’s in jail. There’s time. I just want to sleep.

  Someone slides the curtain aside and enters. It’s Joel—I know from his shape, his gait, his mop of floppy dark hair, his presence—and I breathe out.

  I’m safe.

  “I can answer any other questions you might have,” he tells the policeman, his voice pleasant but firm. “Jet needs his rest.”

  “But Mr. Connors can answer—”

  “I. Can. Answer.” Joel looms over the policeman, looking pretty menacing for such a pretty boy, all wide shoulders and bulging biceps. “I’m privy to all the information you need. Mr. Connors is my boyfriend and has told me everything.”

  The policeman’s face turns red, and I blink, a light ringing filling my ears.

  Did he say “boyfriend”? About me? To a policeman? As in, officially?

  “Who are you,” I ask him slowly, “and what have you done with Joel?”

  Joel turns to me, flashes me a wide smile and a wink, and returns to his job of intimidating the poor policeman.

  Holy… That didn’t just happen, did it?

  “Our girlfriend is waiting for us outside. I don’t like to keep her waiting,” Joel says, and I struggle to keep my face serious as he accompanies the guy outside—then pokes his head back in to waggle his brows at me and make me laugh.

  Then of course I’m cursing and gasping because laughing isn’t that good for my broken ribs and stab wound.

  Dammit.

  After that, though, Candy comes in and takes my hand. She reads from Harry Potter to me and when I get too drowsy to follow, she takes her glasses off and curls up beside me on the bed.

  I smile at her, her touch calming me. Between Joel taking care of the police and her stroking my cheek, I fall asleep, and this time there are no nightmares.

  ***

  My father’s father was a real bastard. He’d abused my father so badly as a child, it was a miracle that social services had found him alive after his father’s last murderous binge.

  Whether that was what turned my own father into a crazy murderer or not cannot be proven. I guess we’ll never know what triggered the madness. And why every five years?

  Another riddle. The police think it might be just a serial killer thing. A ritual. A pattern. He did have a thing for number five, I remember. He liked it.

  Christ.

  “Jet?” Candy always has a knack for knowing when I need her close. She sits beside me, laces her hand with mine. “Okay? You’ve been awfully quiet since that man from the police left. Did they find out anything else about your father?”

  “It’s all supposition. He was nuts, Candy pops.” I try to swallow, but my throat is too dry. “He waited five years and came to finish me with the knife he killed my mom with. I just… Fuck.”

  I’m horrified by the threat of tears. I’ve cried more these days than I have my whole life. It’s like the stabbing really broke something in me. How am I gonna get it fixed?

  “He’s gone now, Jet.” She’s reading my mind again, or maybe it’s my face, who the hell knows? She puts her other hand in my hair, stroking, and my breathing eases. “It’s normal to feel like this. He’s your father. And he’s done gruesome things to your family and to you. It’s okay to hurt.”

  I’m not crazy. And I’m not alone. The nightmare is over.

  It’s okay. I repeat the words in my mind as she caresses my hair, soaking them in. It will be okay.

  And when Joel walks in with a shit-eating grin and informs me I’ve been cleared to go home, I can finally believe it.

  Epilogue

  A month later

  CANDY

  This bed is huge. Like, humongous. Joel wasn’t joking when he said he’d get the biggest bed th
ey had. It’s in what used to be his bedroom, taking up most of the space.

  Joel isn’t on it, though. I check under a blanket.

  Nada.

  “Did you lose something?”

  Jet is standing at the door of what used to be his bedroom, now a room-for-all uses—mainly a room where they both throw whatever they don’t want to bother with putting away, from clothes to shoes to books and papers.

  Of course it’s officially called the Drawing Room, and there are also all of Jet’s drawing supplies and his folders of drawings, but nah. He prefers drawing in the living room, lying on his stomach on the carpet, or sprawled on the sofa.

  Or on the new ginormous bed.

  “Joel.”

  “He’s too big to lose, Candy girl.”

  “But he was here, like, two seconds ago.”

  “Ah.” Jet winks, jabs a thumb over his shoulder. “He’s helping me pick out a few accessories.”

  Accessories? “What for?”

  “Trust me?” He blinks those ridiculously long lashes at me, and I melt. I nod as he takes my hand and leads me to the bed. “Trust us.”

  “I do.”

  Besides, he’s bare-chested. How he thought I could ever refuse anything he asked of me is beyond me. I put my hands on his ribcage, run them up to his firm pecs, over his ink.

  The scars from the stabbing and the surgery are still dark, angry red slices in his pale flesh. I caress them and feel him tremble. His eyes go distant, and I know he’s remembering that night in the alley.

  I slide my arms around him, kiss a path from his shoulder to his neck. “Are you with me?” I whisper in his ear.

  He groans softly. “Always.”

  “The hell? You guys started without me?” Joel’s voice comes from the doorway and I turn my head to find him standing there, a wide grin splitting his face. “Fucking horny dawgs.”

  Jet snickers. “Seriously, dude?”

  Joel saunters in, a box in his hands. “It was worth it seeing that guilty look on your faces.”

  “We hadn’t even started,” I say and lick my lips. “You came right on time.”

  “That’s me. I’m always punctual, unlike Jet who’s always late.”