“Jake? What are you doing here?”
Jake was standing under the overhang on their porch in a wet jacket with a huge bouquet of pink roses in his hand. He looked really cute. And wet. But why had he come by after she specifically told him she’d call him later?
“I wanted to bring these by for you.” Jake held the roses out. Brooke didn’t take them, still reeling from the surprise visit. Her mother reached out and accepted the flowers with a smile. Brooke could feel her awkward gaze bounce between her and Jake.
“You’re Keisha’s friend, right?” her mom asked.
Cocking her head to one side, Brooke opened her eyes a little wider silently reminding him about her lie. Understanding, he smiled at her mother and nodded.
“I was in the middle of getting dinner ready, so I’ll take these with me.” Brooke’s mother walked back to the kitchen with the flowers, ending the awkward exchange. Brooke stepped out into the nippy evening to face Jake. She crossed her arms and sighed.
“Are you pissed that I got you roses?” Jake seemed utterly confused.
“No. I’m just kind of annoyed you showed up here without calling me first.”
“I can’t seem to do anything right today.” It appeared he was waiting for Brooke to tell him he was wrong, but she didn’t. “I figured it might be a nice surprise after I screwed up royally this morning.” Brooke wasn’t sure what to say. “Should I take the flowers back and pretend this never happened?” Jake flashed that disarming smile of his, lightening the situation. Brooke couldn’t help but grin too.
“No. I’m keeping the flowers. They’re really pretty.”
Jake chuckled. The connection Brooke had felt with him on their date was back. Suddenly, he felt familiar and Brooke found herself forgiving him for everything. Jake seemed to sense it as well and hooked her index finger with his.
“Well. I better go so you guys can eat.” She nodded. Jake turned and looked out at the deluge pounding the pavement. He pulled his jacket up tight around his neck. Brooke felt a mix of guilt and longing rise up inside her. Regardless of how conflicted she was about the incident at school, every time she saw him, she felt drawn like a magnet. Besides, he was already here. He’d already met her mother. What would she gain by sending him on his way now?
“Jake,” she called. He turned and looked back at her. “Have you eaten yet?” It was still early in the evening and she was sure he hadn’t.
“No.”
“Do you want to stay for dinner?”
Turning on his heel, he said, “I was hoping you’d ask me.” Then he grinned the same grin he’d given her the first night they met at the bathroom door in the karaoke bar. That smile. It was so disarming and even harder to resist.
“I know,” she laughed and led Jake out of the brisk air and into the house.
“So when did you buy the Ferrari?” Brooke’s mother asked as they sat around the kitchen table, a steaming pot of chowder between them.
“It was my one big purchase when the first check came. I’ve always been a car enthusiast. Even as a kid, I loved going to car shows. Don’t worry, though. I didn’t blow all of my money. I’m saving most of it for my future.” Brooke bit into her grilled cheese sandwich and turned her gaze to her mother, who seemed somewhat impressed with Jake.
“You decided not to go to college?”
“I will at some point,” Jake said. “But right now, my company’s doing well. I figured college’ll always be there. This is delicious by the way. Do you mind if I have a little more?”
“Be my guest,” Brooke’s mother said and ladled more soup into his bowl.
“Me too, Mom.” As her mother refilled Brooke’s bowl as well, she continued with her questions.
“I bet your parents are proud of your success. What did they say when you sold your app?” Brooke sat up a little straighter, interested in finding out more about the parents Jake refused to talk about on their date.
“They were hard workers. We lived on a farm, so my dad was out in the fields from sunup to sundown pretty much every day. My mom worked a lot too, at a meatpacking plant. They were so happy when I sold the app. Of course I gave them some money so they could both retire early.”
Huh? Brooke thought. What was so bad about that story that it would’ve ruined their dinner?
“Do you see them a lot?”
“I go back for the holidays. I’m looking forward to flying them out here, though, so they can see Philly. They’ve never been to the East Coast. My dad loves history, so seeing the Liberty Bell would be a big deal to him.”
Brooke’s gaze drifted from Jake to her mother and back. There was something strange about the story Jake was telling. It didn’t seem to align at all with what he’d told her at the restaurant.
An hour later, Jake helped clear the table and announced he should probably get home. He had some work to finish up. The rain had stopped, so Brooke threw on her coat and shoes and walked him to his car.
“I think your mom really likes me.”
“All that stuff you told her about your parents, was that true?” Brooke asked, confused. At Wally’s on Main, Jake said he hadn’t been in contact with his parents since he left home. She wanted to know if he’d lied to her or her mother, and why.
Jake remained silent until they reached the Ferrari.
“Some of it. The part about where my mom worked and my dad being a farmer was.”
“Why’d you lie?”
“There was no way I was going to tell your mom what kind of childhood I had.”
“Well, tell me,” Brooke implored. “How can I get to know you when you won’t share this kind of stuff?” Jake’s secrecy about his family was starting to get on her nerves. Jake sighed and looked up at the flickering streetlamp.
“My parents used to lock me in the closet a lot. Made me sit in scalding hot water when I disobeyed. I still have marks on my legs from it.” Brooke noticed how rapidly he was explaining, how abrupt his hand movements were as he ran his fingers through his hair.
“When my dad really beat me up bad, my mom would take me to the hospital two hours away but told me I had to lie about how I got the bruises and burns and broken hands. You really want me to go on? It gets worse. . . .”
Brooke felt sick to her stomach. How could anyone abuse a child like that? “No. I’m sorry I pressured you.”
“Look. I want to tell you everything about me. And I will. But in small chunks. They’re easier to digest that way. The truth is, my parents weren’t happy for me when I sold the app. They were jealous. And they tried to get control of it and take it away from me. Thank god they weren’t successful.”
Her heart went out to him. “I’m really sorry that happened to you. It must’ve been horrible.”
“You know, I never had what you have. Tonight. I got to sit there and eat home-cooked food and talk with your mom and she was interested in what I’d done. Interested in my future. My parents never asked me if I planned to go to college. When I told them I wanted to go, they refused to even sign the student loan papers. You’re lucky. And I’m grateful that even for one night, I got to be a part of it.”
Brooke felt tears well in her eyes. She felt so sorry for him in that moment, so connected to him. To the world, he seemed to have everything, but that was so far from the truth.
“The real reason I came here tonight was because I thought you might dump me and I was hoping to talk you out of it. After hearing about my shitty parents, I’m pretty sure you never want to see me again.”
“No,” Brooke assured him. “Not at all. I’m glad you told me about your past.”
It was true. Brooke felt closer to Jake than ever before. Here was a guy who was so smart, so strong and sexy, and yet so vulnerable. She felt like he’d given her a glimpse into his soul that he guarded so tightly, and that made her feel special. He’s been hurt so much, she thought. She didn’t want to be another person who would disappoint and hurt him. Her heart told her to forgive him, to chalk up the mo
rning’s events to Jake’s fear of rejection. Brooke tried to find the words to tell him that but he broke the silence, lightening the conversation.
“I bet you can’t wait to come to Kansas with me now.”
She grinned.
He caressed her cheek lightly and continued, “I like it when you smile. I like it so much better than when you’re telling me to leave you alone.” She laughed. “I actually started working on an app that would prevent you from breaking up with me today but it’s not done.” There he was. The charming, funny, silly Jake she’d been so attracted to last night.
“I like you a lot. And every relationship has bumps. It’s just that ours happened kind of quick and that threw me.”
“In our defense, you do hit those bumps faster in a Ferrari.” He was making her laugh again. And just like she’d felt at the restaurant, she couldn’t imagine not being by his side. It felt natural. “Can I take you out next Friday if I promise not to text you more than once a day?”
“You can text me whenever you want,” she said. “Just don’t get all crazy when it takes me a while to text back.”
“Deal.”
“I can’t go out on Friday. I’m already going to a party that night. It’s been planned for over a month.”
“I like parties. Is it just kids from your school?”
“A bunch of different schools. My friend Riley—the one who almost stepped in and broke up our fight today—is having it at his house while his parents are on vacation. He knows people from everywhere.”
“I think I kinda owe that guy an apology anyway. If I promise to behave, can I go with you?”
Brooke hesitated, the request catching her off guard. Once again, she felt he was pushing her to do something she wasn’t ready to do. She wasn’t ready to integrate Jake with her friends, but she also didn’t want to reject him moments after he told her something so private.
“Uh, yeah, I guess.” As soon as Brooke said it, she knew she’d made the wrong decision. The atmosphere on Friday night would be relaxed and fun. Brooke had been looking forward to having time with her friends to smooth over what happened at the karaoke bar, and especially to reconnect with Maddie. It would be difficult to do that with Jake by her side the whole evening. When the smile spread across his face, though, it struck her that she couldn’t take it back.
Jake leaned in and gave her a soft kiss. When she parted her lips slightly so his tongue could enter her mouth, it felt as if her insides were melting. When he finally pulled away, Brooke inhaled deeply and glanced at the window to make sure her mother wasn’t watching.
“Good night, gorgeous. I won’t let you down. I promise. Next Friday is going to be awesome.” Brooke stood there until Jake got into his car and drove off down the glistening street.
“He’s nice. I like him,” her mother said as soon as Brooke came back inside.
“You do?” Brooke asked, surprised her mother would declare her fondness for Jake so quickly. She flipped the dead bolt and took off her coat.
“Yeah. He’s smart, mannerly, cute, successful—what’s not to like?” Brooke nodded but didn’t respond. “Is there something more I should know about him?”
She detected a note of worry in her mom’s voice. If she wanted Jake to have a chance at being accepted by her mother, she couldn’t tell her mom about the fight at school. Or the texts. Or the fact that everywhere they went, bartenders let them drink as much booze as they wanted because Jake would slip them a hundred-dollar bill. If her mom were aware, or even suspicious, of any of those things, her opinion of Jake would be dramatically affected.
“No. He’s . . . I think he’s a good guy,” Brooke said. Her mother smiled.
“I’m going to take a bath and go to bed. Sleep tight, sweetie.” Brooke’s mom gathered up her shoes and sweater and headed up the stairs. Brooke lowered herself onto a chair in the living room, conflicted. Every time she and Jake parted ways, she was left feeling either completely exhilarated or upset. If somehow the IED was influencing her, she needed to do the only thing that worked—think it through.
“Okay,” she whispered, then asked herself, “What bothers you about him?”
Deep down, she had doubts about Jake. As sweet as it was, showing up uninvited at her house with flowers wasn’t much different than showing up uninvited at school. And even after telling him she wasn’t available on Friday, he pressed her to allow him to tag along.
And then there was still this strange coincidence between Jake’s confrontation with Tryg and Tryg’s attack. I wanted to mention it to him, she reminded herself. Brooke had forgotten all about Tryg after Jake showed up. She’d been so focused on mitigating the interactions between Jake and her mom that it had completely slipped her mind. She made a mental note to bring it up on Friday, when they were face-to-face, so she could gauge his reaction.
And yet, she was so attracted to him in so many ways. Aside from the obvious physical chemistry, he made her laugh. He was fun to be around and she loved that when she was with him, she didn’t have to work to control her emotions. He’d given her permission to go crazy and she knew he wouldn’t ask for space like Maddie had.
And while the luxurious lifestyle he lived was nice, what really impressed her was that Jake wasn’t about the money at all. He’d grown up poor, and so while the expensive watches and cars were nice, she got the sense if it were all gone tomorrow, Jake would simply shrug.
On top of all that, she’d made a breakthrough with him tonight when he let her in on the abusive childhood he’d endured. He was starting to trust her and she liked that. Being with Jake was like being on a roller coaster. Earlier, she’d thought she wanted off the ride but now, tonight, she wasn’t so sure.
Ten
Making Amends
An obnoxious buzz jolted Brooke from a restful sleep. Keeping her eyes pinched shut, she stretched her arm out to turn her alarm clock off. Flopping her hand around, she felt for the small plastic clock, but it wasn’t there. Brooke opened her eyes and noticed that instead of sitting in its normal spot, the clock had been moved over a few inches toward the edge of her nightstand, out of reach, and twisted ever so slightly, making it hard to read the numbers from bed. Brooke sat up, suddenly awake. It was too far away for her to have accidentally knocked it in her sleep, and in the four years she’d had that clock, she’d never done that. Someone must’ve moved it.
“Mom, did you go in my room this past weekend?” Brooke asked as she entered the kitchen, where her mother was pouring coffee into a thermos.
“No. Why?”
“Are you sure you didn’t look through my nightstand or something? My alarm clock was moved.”
Her mother laughed. “You probably moved it when you turned it off. I wouldn’t go through your things without asking.”
“That’s not what happened. Someone moved it.”
“Brooke, come on. Who? Alex?”
“Not Alex. He wasn’t even here.”
“Maybe it was Jake,” her mother said, raising an eyebrow. “When he was here Friday.”
Brooke pondered for a moment. Jake had only left once, to use the downstairs washroom. He couldn’t have had enough time to go up to her room and snoop around. “I don’t think so.”
For a moment it looked like her mother was going to speak, but she took another sip of her coffee instead. Brooke thought she knew what her mother wanted to say.
“I know what you’re thinking, Mom. One of the side effects of the mood stabilizers is paranoia.”
“I wasn’t going to say that.”
“But you know it is. You were thinking it.”
“No I wasn’t.”
“I’m not paranoid.” It came out more aggressively than Brooke intended.
“I know that. And for what it’s worth, I think the medication is finally working. Two months ago, if you’d thought I’d gone through your room, you would’ve come barreling down here with guns blazing. Every day I see you acting more and more rational, more in control of your
emotions. You should be proud of yourself.”
The comment gave Brooke a sense of peace. She was doing better. Even in her conversation with Maddie before practice, she’d managed to act like a normal human being.
“I gotta go. Have a good day, sweetie.” Brooke’s mother kissed Brooke on the cheek and scooped up the mess of children’s art lying on the counter. Brooke had no idea how her mother could spend six hours a day in a classroom teaching six-year-olds, but somehow she did it.
“Don’t forget your coffee.” Brooke handed her the thermos before her mother disappeared around the corner.
Did I move the alarm clock and forget? she wondered as she watched her mother go. She wasn’t entirely sure that her mother hadn’t moved it, but what would she be looking for, going through her room? Drugs? Alcohol? Proof that Jake and Keisha weren’t really friends? Whatever it was, Brooke wasn’t going to get an answer right now. The mystery, as much as it bugged her, would have to remain unsolved. Brooke needed to get to school.
Brooke waited at the door to the cafeteria, trying to find Maddie, as the mass of students, laughing and talking, filtered past. Brooke was just about to give up when she spotted her chatting with Keisha. Since it would be hard to find time alone with Maddie at the party, Brooke had hoped to have lunch with just her, so they could work through their issues once and for all. Having Keisha there as the third wheel wasn’t conducive to a real heart-to-heart. But at least it was better than nothing.
“Maddie!” Brooke hurried over.
“Hey,” Keisha said, ever-positive and cheery. Maddie smiled but seemed uncomfortable.
“Wanna go to Amigos?” Brooke asked, hoping that eating at their favorite Mexican joint two blocks away would help put Maddie in a good, and more forgiving, mood. Keisha and Maddie exchanged looks.
“Sure,” Maddie said, though there was a distinct lack of enthusiasm in her voice. “Why not?”
Cutting across the teachers’ parking lot, Brooke, Maddie, and Keisha made their way to the quaint, adobe-style restaurant on the corner. They could hear the mariachi music that emanated from a speaker mounted over the front door, before they even crossed the street. No one mentioned Tryg on the walk. Instead, Keisha talked the entire time about how hard the AP Calculus test was the period before.
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