Grace Given (Touch of Grace)

by Beth Shriver

She nodded but didn’t meet his eyes. “Once. Before Katie left.” Elsie said it quickly as if to get the words off her chest.

  “Does Katie know about these men?”

  She nodded again.

  Gideon grunted without thought, frustrated with Katie once again but this time because of something that affected the entire community. “So you two kept this to yourselves?”

  “They scared us, Gideon. We’ve never known men like this, full of anger and hate.” She held back a sob, and he felt ashamed for asking the question. It was the protective side of him that didn’t help now with what had already been done.

  “I’m sorry, Elsie. I don’t blame you. I’m just upset that this has happened. I wish you would have come to me when it first started.”

  “We didn’t know what to do. I prayed it would all go away, that they would see we are peaceful people and let us be.”

  “Tell me how it started.” He guided her to a wooden bench close to Mamm’s garden and sat next to her.

  “I’ve tried to shut this out for so long that it’s hard to talk about.” Elsie put a hand to her forehead and slumped down.

  Gideon kept hold of her hand, not wanting to lose the physical connection, and spoke softly but clearly. “Did they tell you not to?”

  “They told us to persuade the Amish to leave, that we weren’t wanted here.”

  “What did they expect you to do? Convince the entire community to pack up and leave?” He couldn’t hide his irritation at their irrational request. “If they had any integrity, they would have come to one of us men.” He scoffed, knowing harassing the women would be more powerful; these young men obviously knew that too.

  Elsie looked down at her muddy boots. “They thought we would leave after our first crop because it was so bad.”

  “Well, that changed after our men learned how to irrigate using the drip tape and found a fertilizer that worked. I don’t think it’s the land so much as they like to push their weight around.”

  “That’s what they say, Gideon, but maybe they just want the power to decide who their neighbors are.”

  “I wish you would have told me or someone about this.”

  “We didn’t know what to do.” She twirled her thumbs. “Then John and Annie’s wheat field went up in flames.”

  Gideon jerked his head back with the thought that it could have been these men who did this. How could anyone be so bold and heartless as to destroy a man’s livelihood? He watched as Elsie wiped a tear from her cheek.

  “Whether they did it or not, I feel as if I’m the one who lit the match. I should have said something earlier.”

  “You did what you thought was right. Don’t punish yourself, Elsie. None of us have experienced something like this for no apparent reason.” When he looked at her, he saw the guilt she must feel. “Losing that crop is what gave Annie and John the determination to start their bed-and-breakfast. It all worked out for gut.” He turned away, thinking about the position she’d been put in. “I probably wouldn’t know what to do either.”

  She almost smiled. “Jah, you would. You always know.” He was caught in her eyes for a moment, feeling her true admiration for him. It was something he’d hoped for but never thought he’d see. He pulled himself back to the problem at hand.

  “I wish that were true, but with this, all I know is it needs to end.”

  Elsie looked up in alarm. “I’m afraid they’ll do worse things.”

  “We can’t let them continue to threaten you and vandalize others. What if someone gets hurt?”

  Her dark brown eyes bore into his and held them for a moment. “That someone will be me.”

  Gideon cringed in frustration. “What do you mean?”

  “I’m not sure of their motivation or anything about them, but the one thing I do know is that I’ll pay the price for anything that doesn’t go their way. They’ve made that clear.”

  He covered his face in his hands to hold back the unfamiliar anger that burned inside of him. Feelings of violence and revenge raged in him like never before. He didn’t know how to hold back these detestable thoughts. But this was the one person he cared for more than any other, and she was in harm’s way. Lord, direct my path, my words and my actions. When I am weak, You are strong.

  Her expression showed her worry and concern. “Don’t ever take on a burden like this alone again, Elsie. You have me now.” And he would do whatever it took to keep her safe, even if it meant going against the Amish vow of no resistance.

  Chapter Nine

  ELSIE LET OUT the last of the milk cows and began to wipe down the teat cups. She had never seen Gideon so upset. That was the reason she hadn’t told anyone about the incident with the Englishers. The Amish didn’t know how to deal with oppression, at least not that she knew of. That brought to mind Martyrs Mirror and how relevant the situation was in her present world. This made her want to see Gideon and gave her an excuse to do so.

  It would soon be time to prepare breakfast, and she didn’t want her mamm to worry. Her mind drifted during milking and took longer to get the chore done. Should she tell her? She held the secret for so long she didn’t know how to tell the truth about the situation. What a horrible web of deceit this had become.

  Elsie finished up and closed the barn doors. She stared down at the ground as she walked, and after a few minutes she lifted her eyes to the white four-bedroom place she called home. There were a lot of good memories in the short time they’d lived in the house, making it their home once the others helped with the building and painting. Everything seemed hollow with Katie gone, and Elsie wanted to fill that void with the truth. She made her way up the stairs and into the kitchen ready to bare her soul once the meal was over and dishes were finished.

  “Milking is done, Mamm.” Elsie washed and made herself useful peeling potatoes for hash browns.

  “Just in time.” Mamm glanced over her shoulder and stopped mixing the eggs long enough to get a good look at Elsie. “What’s on your mind?”

  “Things I can’t control, so I should stop thinking about them.” Elsie kept her emotions intact trying to find the courage to tell her mamm all she knew. If only Katie was here. She was the one so adamant about not telling anyone.

  “I’m getting the jams ready for the market. Did you finish that quilt?” Mamm set the spoon down and took two steps to the skillet and turned the bacon. Her preoccupation gave Elsie the time to think through her words.

  “Nee, I didn’t get a chance to. I will, though.” The peeler caught the side of her finger, and she grimaced at the sharp prick. She stuck her finger under the faucet and pressed on the cut.

  “Are you all right?” Mamm went over and studied the injury. “It’s a small cut, but those sometimes sting the most.”

  “I’m fine. I was careless.” Elsie didn’t meet her mamm’s eyes. She wished for the day that she could do so with a clear conscience. It seemed worse now that Gideon knew. She somehow felt responsible for the damages since she knew the offenders, but her fear of them was stronger than her guilt.

  Before she ate her meal Elsie prayed for wisdom then distracted herself by helping with the day’s chores, sweeping, doing laundry, and cooking the noon meal. Her heart lifted as she worked.

  Elsie twisted her hair into a tight bun then put on her white kapp. She took a handful of pins and secured the kapp. She was on her way out the door to see Gideon when her daed called for her to come see him.

  “Why are you in such a hurry?” He folded his arms around his chest and gave her a teasing smile. He knew where she was going and who she was going to meet.

  “I’m going to Rachel’s to finish our quilt,” Elsie bantered back. He frowned for a moment and then realized she was joking with him.

  “Tell Gideon hallo for me.” He grinned and turned back to the barn.

  His playfulness made her smile as she walked over to Omar’s home. Gideon often spent his lunchtime there and read Martyrs Mirror along with other books the m nister gave him to study.
Gideon’s passion to learn about their faith kept him committed to carve time out of his day as much as possible.

  When Elsie got to the white building, the door opened, and there stood Omar, as if waiting for her. “Gut afternoon, Omar.”

  “Elsie, what brings you here?” He must have known why, but she’d play along. She didn’t know if he would mind if the two of them were together. But Gideon wouldn’t have asked her to come if he thought Omar wouldn’t consent.

  She smiled and shrugged “I would like to talk with Gideon. But to tell you the truth, I’m not sure what I’m getting myself into.” She was referring to Gideon’s search for knowledge. She knew Omar appreciated that in Gideon.

  He chuckled as he walked with her to the den and stopped at the door. “How are you and your family?” He stood before her, his fingers twined.

  “We’re . . . adjusting.” She knew he meant Katie, and although she appreciated his concern, she was more interested in the men they were choosing to go to the new community.

  “God only gives us what we can bear. You and your family are strong, as is Katie. I feel certain you will all be together again.” His eyes lit up when she smiled again.

  “I hope you’re right, Bishop Omar.” She thought about the real reason she’d come and couldn’t hold her tongue. “Have you heard who is leaving for the new community?”

  He smiled. “You’re eager to know Gideon’s plans, I take it.”

  She felt her face heat and let out a breath to calm herself. “Well, jah, I am curious.”

  “I believe Gideon has a calling to ministry, Elsie. He feels that’s true as well. If so, he may be called to go and do things that may be hard for his friends and family. We have many Amish still considering moving down here.” He pulled on his beard and chuckled. “Although the northerners think we are making all kinds of money and getting enticed into temptations.”

  Elsie laughed with him. “Where would they get such an idea?”

  “Oh, you know how people are. They get a piece and make it into a whole.” He took off his glasses and rubbed the arch of his nose.

  “Maybe that’s why so many want to move here.” She grinned.

  “Maybe so. They’ll be sorely disappointed, though, won’t they?” he said with lifted brow.

  “Jah, the life down here isn’t much different except for the heat.” They both nodded, and he dabbed the back of his neck with a hanky as if saying the word made him hot. “Is Gideon in the next room?”

  “Jah, go on in. Just try to drag one of those books away from him, especially that Martyrs Mirror.”

  “He’s been telling me all about it. It is quite fascinating to study a book about our heritage and from so long ago.” Elsie heard her-self saying the words and felt she sounded like Gideon.

  “I thought I heard your voice.” Gideon stood in the doorway with his hands on either door frame, enhancing his lithe build. “Did you come to see me?”

  “Jah, if you have a minute.” She stood before he could answer and walked past him into the room he used for preparing the sermons and taking in parishioners who needed to talk to him privately.

  She sat and put her hands on her lap, trying to stay focused on his studies but failing miserably. As much as she wanted to know if Gideon was leaving, she stopped herself from speaking. Even so, she couldn’t squelch the thoughts. She wanted to tell him every-thing about those young men just to make him stay. “Is there anything in that book that can help us with our neighbors?”

  Gideon didn’t move for a moment, taking in her words, and then opened the book. He leaned forward, pointing to a paragraph. “Love is as strong as death and jealousy cruel as the grave. For here you see in a mirror, like our ancestors. Who can separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, distress, persecution, famine, nakedness, peril or sword?”

  “Persecution?” Elsie closed her eyes and let out a sigh. “That’s a Bible verse.”

  He nodded. “That we are to reflect.”

  “Gideon, I shouldn’t have asked you not to tell anyone about those men.” She fought the emotions that rose each time she thought of them.

  Gideon stood and closed the door. He might be chastised for it later, but this was too private to let anyone overhear. “I’m hopeful we will get the opportunity to talk to these men. If not, we’ll have to take some action of our own.”

  “What do you mean?”

  He moved closer and stared at her intensely. “I originally thought it might mean breaking the vow of the Amish no resistance.”

  Elsie felt an alarm go off in her head. “No one is to break the laws our ancestors started years ago. The law against violence goes back to the Civil War when the Amish refused to fight.” She didn’t know what the consequences were, but she didn’t want Gideon to face a shunning or, worse, being ostracized from her and the community. “You can’t break the ways of our people.”

  “Unless it’s to protect you. I would never forgive myself if anything happened. And it will only get worse with more Amish moving here. This needs to end before more settle in.”

  “Jah, I’ve thought of that too.” She twiddled her thumbs. “Maybe they won’t come back.”

  “I hope they do, so I can try to talk with them. And I’ll go to Omar.” Gideon leaned forward and spoke softly. “God has given us this task. He will walk us through it until His will is done.”

  “Your faith is strong, Gideon. I will try to be as strong as well.” Elsie was glad to finally have someone to talk to about all that happened. She could trust him completely, and she trusted his opinion as to what she should do. She still owned the problem even though he was involved now. The feelings of helplessness against these men dissipated somewhat, and she knew it was because of Gideon by her side.

  “I’ve talked with Minister Miller.” He calmly pulled his chair up next to her, leaving her on edge as to what the decision was. “I have offered to do what needs to be done either here or away. If Minister Miller requests me to go, it’s not something I’ll refuse.” He smiled like a child with a new toy, obviously proud to be considered for the opportunity.

  “I’ll try to pray with an open mind.” Elsie smiled, knowing she would need a lot of patience if she would have to share him with the new community.

  “Maybe leading this group is a way to find out if I’m truly suited for the work.” He was so humble about his standing in the community, but Elsie knew he would someday have a place, whether it was as deacon or minister. As she looked up into his shining eyes, she wondered what took her so long to come to him.

  Chapter Ten

  WHEN GIDEON FINISHED his morning chores, he went over to the Yoders. The heavy humidity and clear skies intensified the heat of the sun that shone down on his straw hat.

  Solomon was under the weather, but Gideon hoped he would have the opportunity to talk with him privately. But Solomon could be ornery, especially if he was in pain. He insisted on instructing and giving direction to the group of men who would gather at his home to plant corn. Solomon had been in fits that the seeds were not in the ground yet. He could see spring budding from his window and was quite sure it happened overnight.

  “The dogwoods are starting to bloom.” Yonnie walked up behind Gideon and slapped him on the back. It was just hard enough to irritate him.

  “You don’t know your own strength.” Gideon told him but with no hope he’d understand.

  “See there.” Yonnie pointed to the young leaves on the trees. His shaggy, curly hair fell into his eyes, and he brushed it away.

  “Size of a squirrel’s foot,” Gideon said, wondering why he didn’t notice. It was the sign they always waited for to know if the soil was warm enough to plant. They started planting a little earlier with some families due to the minister leaving and taking a couple of men who offered to go.

  “You’ve haven’t noticed a whole lot of anything lately, so I thought I’d point that out for ya.” He shook his head, making his locks dance around his eyes again.

&nb
sp; “I’ve been busy, and you need a haircut.” He mussed Yonnie’s hair, knowing that would stop the teasing.

  Gideon eyed Elsie and suddenly didn’t care what remark Yonnie was going to say next. Wisps of dark hair fell below her kapp that she fumbled with as she went out onto the porch. “Morning.”

  “Gut morning, Yonnie, Gideon. Mamm and I have made some breakfast if you’re hungry.” She gestured to the kitchen door, and Yonnie stepped right up.

  “I can always eat.” Once through the door Gideon could hear him greeting everyone with his booming voice.

  “Do you want anything? My mammi made her blueberry pancakes.” Her bright smile made him feel better. He was uncertain about talking with Solomon, and it lifted his spirits.

  “No, thanks. My mamm didn’t want any leftovers and decided I was the one to take care of that for her, so I’ve had my fill.” He put a hand on his stomach.

  Elsie smiled. “Did she feed you until you were stuffed?”

  “Like the fatted calf.” He grinned, and she did too. “I guess I should get to work.”

  “Thanks for helping plant today. It’s made my daed very happy. Well, as happy as anything could.”

  “I’m sure he’s wishing he was out there in the field.”

  “He says he’s feeling better, but Mamm doesn’t believe him.” She put her hands on her hips as her daed came toward the porch. “Where are you going?” She took his arm as he shuffled across the white wood floor.

  “If I can’t help, I’m gonna at least watch. Isn’t that right, Gideon?” He eased himself down into the rocking chair and let out a long breath.

  “Jah, I’d be the same.”

  “I’ll be buried in the land I’ve tilled. Want to make sure it’s ready for me.” He smiled at Elsie, but she just shook her head at him.

  “You’ll tell me if the pain flares up again, won’t you, Daed?” She took a blanket that was folded on the back of the chair and laid it on his lap.

  He pulled at it. “You fuss at me like I’m an old man.”