Brad did not write that night, nor the following day, nor the one after that. And he did not even have the decency to answer Pam’s message that said“I’m thinking about you”. It was at that moment that she realized she should have followed the diva’s instructions. On this occasion she was not wrong about Brad, and her advice and orders would probably never fail the young woman, who decided to focus on what mattered, what Marilyn was there for: for Pam to become a star.
CHAPTER 8
WOMEN TAKE REVENGE
BETTER IN SILENCE
(Marilyn Monroe)
Pam received a cheque for $2500 from the sales of her photographs on Tuesday. On Wednesday she went to the hairdresser’s. Finally she had the blonde, seductive and cared for mane that she had always wanted. Marilyn approved the change.
On the first day, she had the photo session with the important photographer Samantha Moore had recommended. The session cost her the trifling amount of $350 which included makeup, a stylist and are and professional studio included. She would get ten photos with retouches that she could send to the agent to once again considered her. Immediately, Robert knew how to see an unparalleled beauty in Pam. Her big lips and big blue eyes stood out. As did her funny freckles, her gorgeous blonde mane and her fun, jovial and cheeky smile.From a distance, Marilyn told Pam which poses made her look better.
“Show your right side, the right side is always better,” Marilyn said, an expert in posing for cameras.
It was a four-hour session. Robert was satisfied with the work they had done and promised Pam that although he had a few things pending, he would focus on her photos so that she would have them that very night. He predicted she would have a promising future in Hollywood, which encouraged Pam to keep going and to forget the lapse she had had with Brad.
“I will speak well of you to Samantha. You have a lot of talent, a lot. You pose really well.”
“Thank you very much,” said Pam. “I loved the makeup and the wardrobe. It was incredible. Do you think you will be able to hide the cast?”
“Yes, don’t worry. There are tricks for that and the wardrobe helped a lot. I hope Samantha wants to represent you, you will have a lot of opportunities with her. We’re here for anything else you need.”
When she left the studio, a stunning and gorgeous Pam suffered one of the worst disillusions of her life. Brad was coming the opposite way, with a beautiful young girl on his arm, brown skin with slanted eyes, tall and thin.
“Don’t look, don’t look,” Marilyn said to her.
But Pam looked. And it hurt. And she decided to run up to Brad to tell him what’s what. She stood in front of the couple whilst Marilyn covered her eyes behind her, wanting to avoid the tense situation that would not benefit her young and imprudent friend at all.
“Pam,” Brad stuttered, looking at his escort.
“Hi Brad. I’m Pam Miler, and you are?” she asked the woman, who seemed to be a runway model.
“Sandra…”
“Sandra. I want you to know something about this boy. He will get you in bed, make love to you, it will be the best night you ever have and the next day, he will stop sending charming WhatsApp messages and will have lost all interest in you. I just wanted you to know. Good luck!”
“Pam!” Brad shouted, following her and leaving the model in front of an electro domestic store.
“Leave me alone!”
“Pam, she’s my cousin!”
“Oh yeah? I don’t care who she is. Leave me alone.”
“The cousin excuse…” Marilyn murmured, rolling her eyes.
“Why? Look, I’m really sorry I didn’t write or call,” Brad apologized.
“You don’t need to explain yourself to me. I don’t want to hear your excuses,” Pam interrupted, not letting the musician continue excusing himself with lies.
“Yes, yes you do. I fell in love with you, I got scared and I wanted to distance myself from that because I had never felt it before I met you.”
“Don’t trust him, Pam. He is a great actor. He will have a brilliant future,” Marilyn warned, and this time she believed her.
“You are a great actor Brad. You will have a brilliant future. Goodbye,” Pam repeated, smiling.
Pam moved away with her invisible friend, who, proud of the young woman, was stroking her head maternally.
“It is better this way, Pam. You should have seen his face when you walked away.”
“I have a huge weight on me, I need a glass of Dom Perignon,” Pam laughed.
“What I wouldn’t give for a glass of Dom Perignon!” Marilyn sighed, looking at the sky.
The ghost remembered the time she had been able to go up and contemplate her peace and immensity. She also remembered when she had wanted to stay there forever, but Saint Peter had forbidden entrance to the diva. She still had something to do on earth, in the world where only a privileged few could see her. And only Pam seemed to be the person destined to find her, fifty-one years after her death.
That same night, Robert sent ten photos of his recently shot photo book, as promised, that she could start to work with.
“They are incredible!” Marilyn exclaimed.
“Really? I don’t even recognize myself.”
“You look gorgeous. You see, your right side is your best side, like me. Always try to show that side.”
“How funny. I’m going to send them to Samantha now. Look, you can’t even see the cast.”
“That’s due to your style, honey.”
“And Photoshop.”
“Photo what? What invention is this?”
“Photoshop. People touch up their hips to make them smaller, breasts to make them bigger… they can even change the shape of your nose or eyes, get rid of wrinkles of marks on skin. It’s magic.”
“What for? There is nothing prettier than voluptuous hips. That is real and as much as I hate wrinkles, they are too. Defects are what make a person special. It took me a lot to understand that but I finally did. I don’t like this photo…”
“Photoshop. Well I like it. Look, look how my hair shines,” said Pam excitedly, sending the email with the ten photos to the acting agent’s assistant. “There, sent. Let’s see if I get lucky.”
“I have a good feeling.”
But on this occasion, Marilyn was wrong. It was Samantha Moore herself and not the assistant’s assistant who answered Pam’s email the following morning.
Hi Pam,
You looked stunning. Robert did an amazing job as always. But I don’t think you’re ready enough yet to work with me. I’m really sorry. Work, get some more experience and when you do we will talk again.
Best of luck,
Samantha Moore
Pam broke down. She went back to bed with a tremendous headache and a terrible itching under her cast. She burst into tears. Marilyn was shaken, but instead of going to console Pam, she preferred to leave her alone. At least for a few minutes.
“Pam, this woman will regret this. Come, let’s go find another agent who will take charge of your career.”
“No, no one will want me, only useless Robert.”
Marilyn knew how she felt. The beginning of her career had not been easy either. It was not the walk in the park everyone thought.
“Young lady, get out of bed. I am going to turn you into a star and I won’t stop until I manage it,” said Marilyn.
“A star? Some are born with it and others like me, are made stars.”
“You are worth more than you think, Pam. You have to believe in yourself.”
Pam stared at Marilyn. In that instant she knew that feeling sorry for herself would not help anyone, and would certainly not make her the star she yearned to be. So she got out of bed, took her medicine to relieve the pain in her broken arm and looked for possible acting agents to send her photos to. Two hours later, she received an answer from a Richard Simmons who was interested in her, and gave her an appointment for the following Monday to talk about her future as an actress.
“You had a good feeling about Samantha too, and look. It seems a bit complicated, he represents real stars!”
“Don’t be so negative, Pam! Accept something, an author receives more negative responses in a year than any other profession and does so his whole life. You have to assume them and not flee at the drop of a hat. Strength is your best weapon.”
“Strength?” Pam asked, as she had always seen Marilyn as a bit fragile.
“Yes, strength. You knew perfectly well that didn’t characterize my life, right?” Pam nodded. “I know, I know. I’m aware of that even though I’m dead,” she continued with a sad expression on her face, as was habitual with the diva’s ghost.
“Forget it, you don’t have to tell me your worries.”
“One day I will tell you my story, Pam. And you will be the only person who really knows who Norma Jean Baker was. But don’t write a book on me or anything like that, please.”
“I wasn’t thinking of doing that. Writing has never been my strong suit.”
“Anyway, how are the photographs?”
Pam had not sold any more. But she hoped to receive the cheques that would solve a few problems for her over the next few weeks. She winked at Marylin and decided to go for a walk in the company of her ghost.
“I like how you watch people,” said Pam, smiling,
“Yes, it’s a distraction.” Pam liked this coincidence. Both of them liked to watch people, strangers. “If you stare at their eyes, you can discover many things, their dreams, hopes, sadnesses, joys… Dreams! Dreams are what move the world, Pam. That… and love.”
“Don’t talk to me about love. It makes me think of Brad and I start to feel awful,” Pam answered, furious and ignoring the curiosity of people who saw her walking through the streets, thinking she was talking to herself. “And besides, you’re very contrary, Marilyn. Now you talk about love as if it were the most wonderful thing on earth and just a few days ago you said that…”
“Words, words!” Marilyn exclaimed, interrupting her carelessly. “Do you want to do something crazy?” Marilyn asked, enjoying herself.
They put together a perfect plan. A small craziness that would be a lot of fun and very exciting…
Pam wrote to Brad. She apologized for the scene she caused in the middle of the street and they arranged to meet in the Piano Bar where Brad had another concert at midnight. This time, Marilyn would not miss the vengeance she had silently prepared with Pam.
At eleven, Brad and Pam had a few drinks at the bar. He seemed happy and Pam started to wonder if it was a good idea to listen to her ghost.
“I’m glad you wrote to me. I promise what I said yesterday was true,” Brad began to say.
“Of course, of course,” Pam answered, not believing him, glancing sideways at Marilyn. “But I have a better idea. Why don’t we go to the bathroom?” Pam, flirty and insinuating, winked at him and stood up, followed by Brad, who looked at her in surprise, not believing this was the same innocent and inexperienced girl he knew.
Brad raised his eyebrows. Excited, he did everything Pam wanted. He went into one of the stalls and took off his clothes. Pam, from outside the stall Brad was in, said that she would come in straight away. Seconds later, she left the bathroom with all of Brad’s clothes and fled quickly with Marylin, who was laughing crazily. Poor Brad was stuck in the bathroom naked, alone and confused. That night he could not play with his band in the Piano Bar… and at two in the morning his friends knew something was wrong. They found him in the bathroom asking for help and they lent him some clothes so that the young aspiring actor could decently leave the Piano Bar, where Pam had made him spend the worst and most distressing hours of his life.
“Women take revenge better in silence,” Marilyn whispered to Pam, whilst the young woman slept placidly on the sofa. “Tomorrow is another day, honey.”
CHAPTER 9
IMPERFECTION IS BEAUTY, MADNESS IS GENIUS
AND IT’S BETTER TO BE ABSOLUTELY
RIDICULOUS THAN ABSOLUTELY BORING
(Marilyn Monroe)
(THE AUDITION, This is Hollywood, Honey)
Richard Simmons is the type of man Marilyn would have irremediably fallen in love with. In his thirties and very attractive, he never wanted to get involved with anyone. Having a serious relationship was not part of his plans, nor was forming a family. He was a free man, who loved his job. His passion was turning young actors into stars. He received Pam with enthusiasm, without needing assistants of assistants. His office, located in Downtown, Los Angeles’ financial district, was small but luminous, elegant and had full views of the city of Los Angeles. On the wall behind the glass desk, were photos of all of those he represented. They were actors and actresses with a long career despite their young age and important international projection.
“Pam, pleased to meet you. Your photos dazzled me I have to tell you that is not an easy thing to do. Not to me,” Richard started to say. Pam was intimidated by the gaze of his green eyes, fixed on her.
“Mamma Mia how handsome… He’s so handsome,” Marilyn said, making the aspiring actress lose concentration.
“Thank you very much, it is a pleasure to be here,” Pam managed to answer, hiding her nerves.
“We are going to work, Pam. Starting today.”
“Today?” Pam asked showing arm in a cast.
“Do you mind if we take the cast off beforehand?” Pam shrugged her shoulders.
“Say yes to everything,” Marilyn whispered.
“No, I suppose it doesn’t matter,” Pam said.
“There is an audition this afternoon for the film Toward the Light, by a new director. His name is Matt Perry, he’s only twenty-seven but he has great projection and is very respected and admired. It’s been produced by Star Films and Plan B and it’s a great opportunity because Marion Cotillard has just confirmed she will star in the film. Your character will be secondary, one of Marion’s nieces who appears on scene when, gravely ill, she has to take the decision to put her son up for adoption who is a little special. The whole thing revolves around him when he’s older and has to figure out something about his dead mother. It set in the thirties, everything is very depressing and hard. But it’s a fantasy film. It has a good script and it’ll be hit.” He smiled cheekily. Pam’s heart skipped a beat and she felt butterflies in her stomach.”Would you dye your hair brown?”
“Of course!” Marilyn answered. “But, who is Marion Cotillard?”
“Yes, I will dye my hair brown, no problem,” Pam answered, ignoring Marilyn.
“They will make you improvise in the audition, so you don’t have any script to learn. Also, that’s what the director likes,” Richard continued, whilst he wrote something on a card. “This is the address. They will expect you at four in the afternoon, don’t let me down. This is a great opportunity, Pam.”
Pam was astonished when she saw that the audition would be held in Actor’s Studio. She was terrified of running into Brad.
“Thank you very much, Richard. I won’t let you down.”
Pam adopted a serene and self-confident attitude to show Richard she was the actress he was looking for. In reality, she was terrified and she was worried about how easy it seemed, with this man that she had just met. They shook hands goodbye and promised to meet soon. Contact with Richard’s hand once again caused a nice tickle in Pam’s stomach that she could not avoid.
“How charming…” Richard sighed, in the solitude of his office, adding Pam’s photograph to his webpage as his promising new actress.
“How charming!” Marilyn exclaimed enthusiastically as soon as they got out of Richards office. “Doesn’t he seem like the most attractive man you have ever seen?”
“Marilyn…You knew Paul Newman… And you’re telling me that Richard is the most attractive man in the world?”
“I didn’t say that. I said…”
“Yes, yes, yes. I’m nervous. A lot.”
“No! No you’re not! In total, there are only going to be a few eyes watching you and your marvelous improvisation! You know you were the best at improvising that I saw in Actor’s Studio when I met you.”
“You think?” Pam asked, feeling better.
“Of course I do! You’re going to succeed, honey. This is just the beginning.”
“Do you know where the audition is? Its in Actor’s Studio,” Pam told her, looking at the card Richard had written the address on.
“What are you telling me! That’s a good sign, Pam.”
“Yes, I suppose. But, what if I see Brad?”
Pam was suffocating in the company of her ghost when she reached Actor’s Studio in the afternoon. Avoiding the students that were smoking a cigarette at the entrance in fear of seeing Brad, she asked at the reception for the addition and they told her to wait in front of the first door she found going up the stairs to the right. She did. At 4.15, the door opened. To her surprise, Pam saw the brown-haired girl that was with Brad a few days ago, ‘his cousin’.
“You remind me of someone,” said the brown-haired girl.
“Yes? I don’t know who,” she said, faking it. She looked at Marilyn and at the man who signaled for her to come in from the door.
“Hi Pam,” said a young man with plastic glasses and black hair that was slicked back. “I’m Matt Perry, the film’s director. Richard has spoken highly of you.”
“Thank you very much, it’s a pleasure to meet you,” Pam answered joyfully.
“First we do a camera presentation,” told her the one that seemed to be the director’s assistant, a man of around forty with a somber and serious face. “After that, we do an improv with Matt’s directions.”
“Very good, that’s super easy,” said Marilyn, winking at Pam.
Pam stood on a cross that was on the floor, in front of the camera. Matt asked her some questions and she answered sincerely, as if she was talking to a friend. Matt was taken by the naturalness of the aspiring young woman who wanted to play in his film. Marilyn, from the corner, nodded complacently.
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