by Anthology
"Malik Jackson," I whispered and watched the literally tall, dark, and handsome boy from my past saunter his way to my table. Though, he was clearly no longer a boy. Formerly slender and borderline lanky, Malik was now built with solid muscle. His former fade was gone, and his shaved head now reflected the dull ceiling lights. His smile was exactly how I had remembered it, though. It held the same charismatic gleam that lightened even the darkest of moods. His eyes were also just as I’d remembered. The richness of their hue weighed down with seduction.
"I can’t believe it," he said as he approached my table. I shifted sideways in my seat then half stood, half sat while I tried to figure out if I should give him the standard hug greeting. Before I had to make a choice, he pulled out the chair next to mine and slid in. "How’ve you been, Ro?" He sucked in his bottom lip dragging his teeth over it in the same way he always had when he greeted me every morning in Econ.
"Good. Good," I shook my head to clear the paralyzing effect that seeing him right now had on me. "I’ve been good. Wild to see you here," I put on a timid smile feeling much like the same girl I was six years ago. Back then, I’d fiddle nervously with my hands under my desk while trying to find anything to talk about with him.
"Yeah, wild," He licked his full lips and grinned. "It’s been, what? At least five years?" He pulled a cup of something clear to his distracting lips and took a drink.
"Six," I didn’t hesitate.
"Six?" He ran his hand across his smooth head. "Has it really been six years since graduation night?" My back stiffened at the mention of that night.
"Mmm," I agreed as best I could and tried not to go back there in my mind. I’d moved past the burn of his rejection a long time ago. Besides, we were adults now. No need to shy away in humiliation after this long.
"So," I sat up and leaned into Malik. "What are you doing now? You still in the Navy?" I remembered how excited he had been to leave for boot camp in Chicago right after school was out.
"I am, I am," His smile was proud but somewhat sullen. "SEAL now, actually,"
"SEAL?" My eyes popped open. "That’s a huge accomplishment," I understood how he was in such good shape now. Those guys worked their asses off, and once they fell off, they kept going.
Malik looked away as if the compliment had made him uncomfortable. "It’s a job," He watched the stage at the front where the last act was setting up. I laughed at his humble response, which brought his attention back to me.
"What about you, Ro?" He nodded to me with that bottom lip between his teeth again. A little swap with my lip for his and I’d be a happy lady. "What are you doing these days?"
"I, uh," I stumbled getting my thoughts back on track. "I’m a social worker for the county,"
Malik whistled. "Tough job, Ro. You must see a lot of ugly,"
"I do," My cheeks scrunched as I thought about some of the living conditions I pulled these kids from, and it was almost never easy. I tried to focus on the end result in every case; I tried to focus on finding these kids happier, or at the least safer, homes.
"I won’t complain, though. I can’t imagine everything you have been through," I said honestly. His eyes darted back to the stage, and he only nodded. "I’m sorry, I didn’t mean," I stumbled again trying to find the right words. "I just meant that your job is tough, too," I clarified feeling like a jerk for bringing up any rough memories. I’d known a few guys over recent years who had been in the military. Most who’d been over in war zones didn’t like to think about it, let alone talk about it.
"I do," He nodded then looked back at me with half a smile on his face. "Enough about work. You look good, Ro, real good," His eyes darkened and gazed over the curves of my body.
This was it. This was my moment. The one every scorned girl hoped for when the guy who had done her wrong saw her looking her best. I sat back into my chair and tossed my long brown hair over one shoulder to give him a better look because this felt amazing. Take it all in, Malik.
"Thank you," I smiled. "You do, too," I added in a lying tone of nonchalance. Malik didn’t just look good. Malik looked like a dark muscled pile of deliciously hot man. The thought if I lick him, he’s mine literally ran through my mind.
"You here with anyone?" he asked folding his bulging arms across his chest.
"Just those two," I flipped my hand back toward Sal and Mike, who were no doubt watching this exchange from the bar. His eyes darted behind me and then landed back on me when a gorgeous full-blown smile lit up his face. His cheeks rose up so high they caused a soft squint in his twinkling eyes.
"Looks like you have your hands full," He laughed briefly, but his laugh gave way to a questioning glance. "No man in your life, though, huh?"
"No, not at the moment," Another holiday alone for me. I wondered why he was so curious, though. I could lie to myself and say he was just making conversation, but I knew better than that. A man didn’t ask if you were seeing anyone unless he was interested, and to prove me right, Malik smiled a closed smile and nodded to himself. Interested. It was funny how much changed in six years, yet not at all.
We sat together for another two hours catching up on everything and nothing at all. Conversation with Malik was just as easy and just as fun as it had been back in our Economics class. He made me laugh as much and even more than he had when I was the shy girl sitting next to the popular football player.
"It’s true, though, Ro," Malik laughed. "Men are just larger versions of boys. We even still play with balls, only more so with the ones attached to our bodies,"
"Malik!" I laughed and covered my face with my hands briefly.
"Speaking of balls," he took a sip of his water, "remember when I coached the Powder Puff team in high school?" His smile was facetious, and I knew exactly what he was getting at.
"You mean, do I remember when you nailed me in the head with the football? Yeah, I remember," I narrowed my eyes at him and smirked. I also remembered how he’d designated me the team running back, even though I couldn’t run for shit, and spent every practice with me. We’d spend the entire time running drills and playing a toddler version of catch while the rest of the team ran scrimmages. As much as needing extra attention embarrassed me, I never complained about the additional time I had with Malik. When he threw that ball to me that day, his smile had stupefied me. I hadn’t even seen it coming my way, and I just made an excuse about having the sun in my eyes. But really, I couldn’t believe he’d smiled so widely at a joke I’d made about needing more practice with balls.
"Man, I felt awful," His face softened into a wistful smile at the memory.
"I know," I smiled at it, too. "You made it up to me with the ice cream after practice, though; not to mention, you hovered over me the entire day at school to make sure I didn’t have a concussion,"
"I was worried about you," He looked away shyly when the bar cued up Pearl Jam’s "Yellow Ledbetter,"
"Closing time," I looked up as the lights brightened.
"I think they’re kicking us out," Malik said watching me carefully.
"Seems that way, doesn’t it," I looked around remembering the bar was closing early for the holiday. "I had fun. It was really good to see you again," The words fell out before my mind could stop them, and I couldn’t decide if I meant them as a goodbye or as a prelude to something more.
"Me, too," He sucked his lips between his teeth after the words, and right then, I decided that I was going to seize the moment.
"Maybe we should do this again sometime," I ignored a brief twinge of nervousness in my gut that said he could reject me again. Malik sighed and winced making that gut reaction a reality. I didn’t feel as dejected as I remembered feeling in high school, though. Maybe it was because I half expected it, or maybe it was because I now knew that life went on after heartbreak. In time, the cracks seam back together and the new joys of life polish out the scrapes.
"We don’t have to, Malik," I smiled warmly to prevent him from feeling awkward. "I just had a good time. Merry Ch
ristmas," I stood up from my chair reaching to grab my purse from over the back of it.
"No, no," he said reaching for my hand. "It’s just, ah…" He groaned again and tossed his head back muttering something to himself. He squeezed his eyes closed one last time, and when they opened, he stared directly at me. "I’m deploying in the morning,"
"Tomorrow?" Tomorrow was Christmas. How could he be deploying? "It’s Christmas," I blurted.
"I know." He picked up his cup and downed the last of his water before rising to his feet along with me. "Crappy, right? But not as crappy as getting to spend a few hours with a beautiful lady and then having to say goodbye," He threw his arms up in frustration but still held on to his smile.
I mustered up a half giggle at the beautiful comment with a tinge of sadness beneath it. He’d said that to me when he’d slid into his seat next to me on the first day of school. The seventeen-year-old in me thought I was special, but the twenty-six-year-old me now knew better. That was how Malik always was—a ladies’ man. Charming them with his smile, compliments, and overall good nature. Being called beautiful by him wasn’t anything out of the ordinary. He handed out compliments like men handed out nudie cards on the streets of Vegas.
"Seriously though," I pushed my thoughts back to the present, "You’re deploying on Christmas, in a few hours really. That sucks,"
"It does," he agreed, watching his fingers tap the tabletop. "Unless…" His dark eyes slid up to meet mine.
"Unless?"
"Unless you’re up for keeping me company for my last few hours in the States?" He raised his eyebrows at me.
"What do you mean?" I lowered my eyebrows at him and lifted my purse onto my shoulder slowly. I’d had fun catching up, and I’d love to see him again, but I wasn’t in the mood to go home with someone after a few hours in a bar. Even someone like Malik.
"Let’s go out. Eat, walk around, whatever. I’d just really like to spend more time with you, and since, well, since I’m out of here tomorrow, this is our last chance," He rubbed his hands together as he was excitedly making our hypothetical plans.
I watched him closely, the way his eyes lit up in anticipation and how he bounced nervously on his toes. I’d imagined this scenario in my head as a teenager, where he’d ask me out and I’d reject him so confidently. Now, I honestly just wanted to spend more time with him. I enjoyed being around him, and well, if it was just for one night, then no harm done. "Let’s do it.
Malik’s eyes popped open wide. "Seriously?"
"Seriously," I stepped away from the table and smiled at him over my shoulder. "We doing this or what?"
"Oh, we’re doing this," He clapped his hands together and came around the table to meet me. He placed one of his hands on my lower back to guide me out of the bar. My stomach heated and I took a deep breath.
"Merry Christmas, guys," I waved to Sal and Mike on our way past them.
"Merry Christmas, Rosalyn," they reciprocated in unison.
"Be safe, smart," Mike added. Safe I was. I had no doubt about that with Malik. Smart? The verdict was still out.
Chapter Two
"What time does it close?" I asked waiting for Malik to lock my purse in the trunk of his Nissan Z. He slammed it closed and walked up to the curb with a shrug.
"No clue, but I don’t think that matters. We can still enjoy the lights and the walk," He had a point. I’d never been to Balbo Park during the holidays, but I kind of liked the idea of most of the Holiday Festival being shut down and simply strolling through the historic arches lit up in lights.
"That sounds wonderful." I tucked my arm through Malik’s and wrapped my hands around his bicep for no other reason than it felt natural. As we turned the corner from the parking lot, we came upon a large fountain lit up from glowing white lights. The fountain sat at the beginning of a paved walkway lined with the historic Gothic buildings of the park. Christmas lights and wreaths covered every building. It was like a twinkling rainbow tunnel. "This is gorgeous," I whispered taking it all in.
"It is," Malik spoke softly back. He took my hand from its comfortable place around his arm and held my hand in his. "Shall we?" He led the way down the deserted path. My senses zeroed in on our joined hands. Mine fit perfectly in his much larger grasp, and the coarse skin on his fingers and palm scratched gently against mine. We’d never held hands before, and as innocent of a touch it was, something was sparked in me like a forgotten match being struck against a dusted box.
"Looks like they’re closing up," I said watching some people begin to tear down their booths.
"There’s a midnight concert at the organ pavilion, so I bet that’s where everyone is at now," Malik nodded at a homeless man walking his American flag decorated bike and trailer across from us.
"I can’t believe I’ve lived here my whole life and have never come to this," I wondered aloud making him laugh.
"There’s too much we don’t do in our lives," Malik pulled on my hand guiding us to a side street. "I think if we share what we do with the ones who we love, though, that’s what matters. Not where you’ve gone or what you’ve seen, but who you spend your days with."
"Well, you’ve become quite the philosopher," I shook my head and laughed lightly.
"Just a man, Ro. I’m just a man," He smiled back from where he walked ahead of me still gripping my hand in his. I sped up to catch him, but he came to a stop. "You see what I see?" I followed his line of sight ahead to a giant pile snow in the middle of an open space of the park.
"Snow," I smiled at the sight of snow in sunny San Diego, no doubt made with a snow machine.
Malik let go of my hand walking backward toward the snow. "How competitive are you, Rosalyn Rodriguez?" He rubbed his hands together and bit his bottom lip in a smile.
I laughed. "I’m more of a peacemaker. Make love not war and all that," I followed him to the hill. He stopped and raised his eyebrows at me.
"While I am also a fan of making love, Ro," He held his hands to his chest and flashed me a panty-dropping grin that made me laugh and need to fan myself all at once. "I had other plans for me, you, and this pile of snow."
The visual of Malik’s dark, solid body covering mine was a welcome interruption. I wondered what kind of lover he would be. Passionate and wild or would he have a steady patience that would make me squirm? Imagining all of it with Malik had my heart rate pumping and no doubt, my skin was flushing.
"To the snow," I said pointing and marching myself ahead. A cool down was definitely in order.
The ticket booth was deserted, as was the hill. "One for you, and one for me," Malik grinned holding up two sleds.
I clapped my hands together with a laugh. "Oh, it’s on Jackson."
Malik and I lined up side by side at the top of the small snowy hill. Though, by this point in the day, most of the powdered snow had solidified into ice. We did a few runs together on the slick ice and were flying all over the place. I laughed so hard I had tears coming from my eyes. I couldn’t remember the last time I had this much fun. The kind of fun that makes you feel like a kid again and reminds you how much fun life was when you set responsibilities aside for just a minute.
My clothes had become damp from the snow, and I sniffled on my way to the top of the hill to meet Malik for the next run. "You getting cold, Ro?" he asked looking concerned.
I waved him off. "A little, but I’m fine," He narrowed his eyes at me not convinced.
"Okay, last run, and then let’s go warm up," I dropped my sled onto the snow and stared at Malik because, well, when I thought of Malik and warming up, I was right back to my thoughts of him melting against me. "Okay?" he asked quirking an eyebrow up at me.
"Yeah, yeah, sounds good," I gritted my teeth together and grinned at him.
"How about we do this one a little different?" He tossed his sled over the side of the hill. "Let’s ride down together."
"Together?" I squeaked out pointing at the sled. "That thing can barely hold me. What if we break it?"
; "We won’t break it," he said holding his hand out to me.
"Famous last words," I smirked and placed my hand in his so he could help me sit on the sled.
The second Malik sat down behind me, my body tensed up. I hadn’t realized how intimately we’d be sitting. Malik’s legs wrapped around on either side of my hips, brushing up against my legs. He leaned his chest against my back and wrapped his arms around my shoulders to reach for the ropes. He had a rich and earthy smell that made me want to sigh in satisfaction. I twisted my head to the left slightly feeling completely immersed in him. He was everywhere—on me, around me, against me.
"You ready, Rosalyn?" he whispered hoarsely into my ear sounding every bit as affected by our proximity as I was. A shiver ran down my spine when the heat of his words slid across my neck. All I could do was nod then nestle back into him. With a hissed intake of his breath, he pushed off and let us sail down the hill together.
With the weight of both of us on the tiny sled, we soared faster than I’d gone all night. The sled barely touched the snow below, leaving us somewhat airborne. It was both terrifying and invigorating. I started to giggle uncontrollably with excitement along with Malik whose chest behind me vibrated with his laughter.
As we neared the bottom, the sled didn’t slow down like it had on previous runs. Instead, it ran clear off the snow and into the grass bumping us along. "Crap!" Malik swore just before the sled cracked beneath us sending us toppling over. It shot out from under us, and we rolled until we came to a stop.
I lay on the ground staring up at the night sky, and I couldn’t help it. I laughed. "Rosalyn?" Malik called out and crawled over to me. "Shit. Are you okay?" When he saw me laughing, he let a few chuckles of his own fall out. He placed his hands on either side of my head and looked down, scanning my face for injuries I assumed.
I looked up at his worried face. "We broke it," I said still laughing.
He threw his head back in a relieved chuckle of his own. "We did," Then he looked back at me and stopped laughing. I stared up at him and wondered what he was thinking and why he’d suddenly stopped laughing with me. I saw it in his eyes, though. He looked down at me with the same heat in his eyes I’d felt just before we’d taken off down the hill together. Then he smashed his lips to mine.