by Anthology
His kiss was intense. Lips hard against mine, his tongue slipped in immediately needy. I met every dip and swipe of it with my own. He kissed me as if he’d been waiting a lifetime for it; as if this was all he’d ever wanted, ever needed. I lifted my arms up and tangled them around his shoulders to pull him down on me. In a groan, he gently fell against me and slowed his kiss.
The first and last kiss we ever shared on our graduation night was so surreal for me that I almost felt like I hadn’t been in my own body when it happened. This time I was completely rooted in reality, feeling every bit of his full, soft lips against my own and tasting the subtle spearmint flavor on his tongue. I felt every roll and flex of his body against mine, and the pounding of his heart against my chest.
We heard a voice clear behind us, and Malik pulled away, though not in any hurry. He stared down at me with a glow in his dark eyes and smiled before leaning in to place a last soft kiss on my lips. Then he stood up and helped me to my own feet.
"Sleds are closed," said a kid tall gangly kid who couldn’t have been much older than sixteen looking everywhere but at us.
"Oh, yeah? Sorry about that, man," Malik reached into his back pocket and pulled out some cash. He walked over to the kid who had taken a tentative step back. I guess if you didn’t know Malik, he looked intimidating with his tall muscled frame and confident stride. "We broke one, too," He handed the money over and shrugged then turned back to me. "Let’s get some cocoa, Ro."
Chapter Three
"You still open?" Malik called into the screened window at the concession stand.
"Five more minutes," a woman’s voice sighed back.
"Want anything else besides the cocoa?" he asked turning his head over his shoulder from where he leaned into the window. "Just don’t order something complicated. This nice lady only has five more minutes before she gets to go see her family," He winked at me.
"Um, how about a cup of cocoa and a cookie?" I always did that. Ordered food or drinks as a question.
"Three hot cocoas and three cookies please ma’am," Three? I cocked my head at Malik’s peculiar order for the two of us.
"That’ll be seven fifty, please," The kind woman passed our order through the window and Malik slid his cash to her.
"Keep the change," Malik said turning to hand me a warm cup and cookie wrapped in parchment paper.
"Sir, you gave me a fifty. Let me get you your change," she called out to him.
"No need, ma’am. Merry Christmas," My mouth fell open. He gave her more than a forty dollar tip. "I’ll be back in a minute. You okay taking a seat over there?" He nodded at one of the dozens of empty tables. I only nodded because I was still shocked at his generosity.
Instead of going to a table, I stood and watched Malik walk over the homeless man we had passed on our way in earlier. He was now sitting under an overhang of a side of one of the buildings. Malik bent down and handed the man the extra cocoa and cookie he had ordered, and the two seemed to talk for a few minutes before Malik turned to head back. Not wanting to look like I was doing exactly what I was doing—staring—I turned on my heel and scampered back to a table.
When Malik joined me, I couldn’t help but say something. "You’re incredibly generous." I sipped my cocoa.
"That wasn’t generous; that was being a good human," He took a sip of his own cocoa.
"A lot of people wouldn’t have done either of those things, let alone both in a matter of ten minutes," I broke off a piece of my cookie and put it into my mouth. The cinnamon and sugar were still soft against the warm dough. Malik looked down at his own cookie and broke off a piece as I had, only he didn’t put it into his mouth. He rolled it between his fingers until the dough turned to dust falling onto the metal table.
He looked up at me then and squinted his eyes only slightly. He sucked his bottom lip into his mouth and bit down on it still looking at me. Then he took a deep breath and began to speak again.
"I’ve seen a lot of ugly in the world, Ro. More than any human thinks another is capable of. It’s messed me up. It’s changed how I see things, how I see myself. It’s like the ugly seeped into my brain and rewrote everything I thought I knew," I held my breath listening closely and nowhere near ready to formulate any words. "I’d like to say being a good man comes naturally, but I make a constant effort every day to do more for others. Even though the ugly still smolders beneath it all, being just plain nice smothers it a bit."
"Are you scared to go back?" I asked and then covered my mouth with my hand and watched his eyes drop to his fingers that sat tangled around each other on the table. I hadn’t meant those to be the words that fell out. I lowered my hand. "Never mind, I shouldn’t ha-"
"No," He cut me off, and his eyes moved back up to meet mine. "I can’t be. My friends, they need me to be focused and sharp. Fear cripples the mind," He took a deep breath. "I’m not scared."
I am. I’d never feared for him when he left for the Navy at eighteen. I was too selfish and heartbroken to care, but now I didn’t see the same Malik I had seen before. He was no longer the guy who kissed me stupid in the back room at our graduation party, and then told me not to move while he went to find his phone so he could get my email to keep in touch. He was not the kid I walked in on with Jessica Landry’s hands all over him in the kitchen when he took forever to come back. Malik was a man who’d been through hell and back, yet had a smile so pure and the noblest of souls. I couldn’t help but see him in a new light, and I suddenly found myself worried for him, for his well-being, for his life. He must have seen the fear in my eyes because he reached out and grabbed both of my hands in his.
"My guys have got my back, Rosalyn, just like I have theirs. We’re good," I nodded thinking that there was nothing he could say that would make me worry less.
"How long are you gone for?" I asked feeling the urge to count the days until he’d be back safely.
"Can’t say," He scrunched his face up. "Can’t say where, can’t say when. Just gotta go," He squeezed my hands in a silent apology, and I nodded my understanding.
"Let’s keep going," he said sliding from the bench and pulling me up along with him by the hands. "We have all night, so let’s not waste it on this stuff."
"Where to next?" I asked letting go of one of his hands and turning to pick up my trash.
He shrugged a shoulder. "Let’s see if any of the booths are still open," He adjusted our hands that were still connected, weaving our fingers together. I looked down at the sight of my tan skin mixed together with his dark skin and smiled to myself. We were holding hands.
* * *
Turned out most of the booths were closed up for the night, which was no surprise considering it was nearing midnight. Still, I thoroughly enjoyed walking down the historic street, which still lit up in a soft glow from the white lights, hand in hand with Malik. Every now and then he would run his thumb over my knuckles bringing up that warm tingling feeling in my stomach. Halfway down the street, I spotted a self-serve photo booth and immediately thought of the perfect thing for Malik to take with him when he left in the morning.
"Come on." I smiled up at him and tugged on his hand. He grinned down at me and followed willingly.
"I don’t even care where you’re taking me right now; that smile on your face is worth it." His eyes were shining again and had lost some of the shadows our talk over hot cocoa had put in them.
"What if I’m leading you to something really lame like pin the antlers on the reindeer?" I joked.
"Still worth it. That smile has kept me moving many times." Malik stopped as soon as he’d spoken the last word. I turned slowly and looked up at him feeling my heart beat a little faster in my chest.
"What are you talking about?" I asked with a hint of a laugh because surely, he hadn’t thought about me all these years.
Malik was never one to bullshit, so I shouldn’t have been surprised when he spoke his next words. "Your smile, Rosalyn," he touched his fingers to my chin lifting my face slightly,
"has never left my thoughts. I’ve compared every smile I’ve seen in the last six years with yours, and none can rival the way yours has always made me feel."
"How has it made you feel?" I whispered searching his face for any insincerity. He ran his hand up my jawline and cupped my face within his rough palm. His eyes focused directly on mine, so dark and intense that my lungs forgot to breathe.
"Happy," he whispered and pulled his hand away from my face, but I could still feel his warmth against my skin. "Is this where you were taking me, oh fearless leader?" Malik turned his attention behind me quickly replacing his tenderness with humor.
I blinked rapidly and took a stumbled turn around to see the photo booth I’d spotted earlier. "Oh, yeah," I guess he was ready to change the subject, and I was too taken aback by his confession not to let him. I mean, what did that all mean? He’d thought of me for the last six years, and I’d made him happy? The word bounced around in my brain trying to find a place to settle down and make sense, but none of it did. Not after the way things ended with us on graduation night.
"Did you see all these props?" Malik asked already at the photo booth. I was so lost in my thoughts I hadn’t even seen him walk by me. I made my way over to him and laughed when he turned around with a white fluffy Santa beard wrapped around his face. "What? You’ve never seen a black Santa before?" I kept laughing when he tugged the red velvet cap down onto his head.
"I think maybe if you had more, um-" I gestured my hands around his head giggling to myself.
"Oh nice, now we’re tiptoeing around my baldness," He smiled and lifted his chin up playfully at me. "Let’s see what we got over her for you," He laughed taking off his beard and hat. "Ah-ha!" He turned around with a tinseled feather boa. "Come here, Ro."
I took a step closer, let Malik wrap the boa around my neck and struck a pose. "How do I look?"
"Eh," He wobbled his hand out in front of him. While he busied himself looking for more accessories for me, I took the liberty of finding a few for him.
"Here ya go. This should complete your ensemble nicely," He spoke with an English accent, and when I turned around, he held a red elf hat covered in silver bells. I leaned in while he pulled it down onto my head. "And one more," he said pulling out a pair of gold glittered cat eyeglasses. He slid them onto my face and flicked a jingle bell before stepping back. "Magnificent," He highlighted his British accent with hands raised in the air this time.
"Your turn, buddy," I turned around to grab my goods. "Now, don’t move," I joked turning with an old black top hat in my hands.
"Aw, dope," Malik laughed as I placed the hat on top of his head. Then I added a candy cane striped scarf and took my own step back to admire my handiwork.
"How do I look?" Malik asked posing with his hand held under his chin. Freakin’ hot, I wanted to say. How was it that I looked ridiculous dolled up in the holiday getup, and he looked like a GQ model in a Christmas spread.
I shook my head. "Like a damn model," He threw his head back in a loud steady chuckle and opened the curtain to the photo booth.
I waltzed by him and tossed the boa that had slid off my shoulder back around my neck effectively smothering his laugh in feathers. Then it was my turn to laugh.
Once situated into the booth, Malik hit the start button and we began a barrage of ridiculous poses. We smiled, we gasped, we made duck lips, and we gave the camera our best attitude poses all while laughing so much I had to dab tears from my eyes again.
"That was really fun, Ro. I’m glad you spotted this over here," Malik said taking off his accessories even though we were still in the booth.
"It really was," I added taking off mine too but getting caught in the boa. I tugged on it but felt a pull underneath my hair. "Crap."
"What’s wrong?" Malik asked putting our costumes on the bench.
"The boa is stuck in my hair," I winced at the slight pinch when I tried to tug it free.
"Here, turn around," Malik said coming up behind me. "Hold your hair up a little."
I turned to face the wall of the booth and pulled a pile of my hair up with one hand. Then I felt Malik’s hands tickle against my neck making me flinch. "Sorry, shit, it’s really in there," His body moved in closer to mine; so close I could feel the heat of him through the back of my clothes. I sucked in a sharp breath.
As he worked on freeing the boa from my hair, all I could focus on was his proximity. Though he was inches away, I felt him everywhere. I felt him hovering over my shoulders. I felt him roll across my back. I felt him pressed firmly against my ass, and I felt him brush down the backs of my thighs. His earthy smell grew thicker in the air as my own body heated up. I tried desperately to get control of myself in any way I could, but then he whispered in my ear, "Got it," The timbre of his lowered voice sent a shiver across my skin. Then he touched his calloused fingertips to my neck and traced them down toward my collarbone. The touch was so delicate and so intentional; I knew he’d been just as affected by this as I was.
"I’m gonna take it off now," Malik whispered again, and I only nodded. Slowly, the feathers of the boa trailed up my body. I watched them drag along my waist bending and popping with the movement. Then they brushed up toward my chest. I was enraptured by the way each bristle of the feather seemed to grab hold of my sweater right above my nipple and then pop as is passed over. I felt Malik’s body sway closer to mine and heard the hiss of his breath as he watched the same thing. Instantly, my body blanketed in goosebumps and my nipples grew hard against the movement.
"Tilt your head," Malik’s voice commanded from behind me, and I obeyed. He dragged the last of the boa across my collarbone and around my neck. The second the feathers touched my naked skin, I sucked in an audible breath at the feel of them. They prickled against me in tiny pinches, and then smoothed their way across the pricks. The last of the boa fell away from my neck heavily, and the air in the tiny photo booth stood still.
"Hey, Ro," Malik’s voice strained, and all I thought was yes. Whatever you want to ask—yes, whatever you want to do—yes.
"Photo booth is closed." A loud voice boomed from outside the booth making us both jump and dousing the air with a cold bucket of reality.
Malik cleared his voice. "Sorry, sir." I turned around with wide eyes and covered my hand over my mouth to hide the nervous giggle that threatened to come out. When I looked at Malik, who stood staring up at the ceiling running his hands over his smooth head, I let it out.
Malik shook his head smiling at me. "Can’t go out there yet." When I cocked my head at him, he pointed down, and my eyes followed directly to the mound in his pants.
"Oh!" I shouted and covered my mouth again. "Oh," I said more quietly, and then a sense of pride overcame me that I had turned him on just as much as he did me. He must have sensed my internal gloating because he just shook his head at me and laughed.
When we finally emerged from the booth, our interrupter was nowhere to be seen. I took our photos out and handed them to Malik. "For you. To take with you."
His eyes softened, and he smiled shyly. "Really?" I nodded and smiled back. He reached into his back pocket and pulled out his wallet. "They’ll go everywhere with me," he said placing them in carefully and folding it closed.
Chapter Four
"You hear that?" Malik asked as we walked down toward the koi pond. I looked up to the clear, twinkling sky and listened to the faint sound of bells.
"I do. What is that?" I asked looking over at him as he peered into the pond.
"The midnight concert is starting. It’s mostly instrumental, but a choir sings a few of the songs. We should really be able to hear it then," I smiled to myself and listened to the sounds of bells bounce through the corners of the buildings and fly on the breeze toward us. "You think the arboretum is open?" Malik pointed ahead at the huge wooden dome.
"Let’s find out," I said following him up to the door. A white sign stood in front. "Dang, closed." I folded my arms across my chest.
"That doesn�
�t mean it’s closed, closed," Malik smiled mischievously and pulled on the door, which opened effortlessly.
"Malik! It’s closed. We can’t go in," I pointed at the sign, but his wicked smile only grew.
"What’s the worst that can happen?" He held the door open for me.
"Well, we could be arrested for trespassing," I pointed out.
Malik dropped his head with a low laugh. "They won’t arrest us. The worst they’ll do is ask us to leave, and we will do so politely. Come on; everyone is at the concert anyway," He nodded to the open doorway.
"For a Navy SEAL, you sure are quite a rule breaker," I squinted.
"As a Navy SEAL, I’m a critical thinker," he said moving the sign aside just enough so that a branch from a low standing tree covered it.
I clapped and walked by him into the warmth of the arboretum. I stopped two steps through and gawked at the beauty of the space. "Whoa," I whispered.
"Whoa," he echoed back standing next to me. Glimmering lights of all colors draped every plant and tree. Elaborately decorated Christmas trees dotted the walkways and filled the air with a crisp pine scent. The only light in the entire space was from the Christmas lights and electric candles in lanterns along the walls. We could still hear the faint sound of the chorus in the distance. The entire space filled me with such awe.
"It’s remarkable," I said running my hand along the warmth of a tiny strand of white lights wrapped around the trunk of a palm tree.
"Mmm," Malik hummed in agreement behind me. His hand reached for mine, and he spun me around to face him. He took one intense look into my eyes, and then his lips crushed into mine.