by Sia Wales
“Finally!” he says in a normal tone but betraying a touch of resentment.
“I was just outside, by the path that leads to the woods.”
He seems taken aback, concerned.
“What happened?”
“Just because I went into the woods, it doesn’t mean there was something wrong.”
He pauses, scrutinizing me.
“You never go. Is something wrong?”
“No!”
“I don’t want you going into the woods at night.” So that’s why he was yelling for me to come in.
“Since when?”
“From now on. Scott and the rangers spelled it out, loud and clear. It’s dangerous. The forest rangers will deal with it all, but for now we have to be careful. What were you two up to?” he asks, suspiciously.
I can tell he wants to comment about me seeing Vuk, or not seeing him, more like it. But when he sees how pale and worn-out I look, he decides to let things go and goes back to being his good-natured self. He seems to sense that there’s tension between Vuk and me, and he studies my face in quiet satisfaction.
“Were you guys fighting? Sorry if I interrupted,” he says with a wide grin spreading across his face.
I grimace and slam the door tellingly behind me.
“Goodnight,” I call out as I make my way up the stairs, his eyes following me every step of the way.
“Wait, Ella May.” Still smiling, Jeff looks at me, his worried look turning into one of confusion. I freeze where I am, one foot on the last step. Doubt surfaces in my mind. Has Tyler said something to Scott, who in turn passed it on to my dad before I got home? But Jeff seems relaxed now that I’m safe and sound under his roof.
“We never get a chance to chat these days. How was your day?” he asks.
“Fine,” I reply. I rack my brain trying to think of what I can actually reveal to him. “I went to class, nothing special. The cafeteria served Chinese food today, but I just ate a cereal bar. I wasn’t very hungry.”
“Wow! I didn’t know they served Chinese at college.”
“Once a week.” I try to look enthusiastic, but my foot taps nervously against the step.
He smiles again, encouragingly.
“And then what?”
I obviously leave out the details of my trip to Wolfeboro and the race through the forest on Vuk’s shoulders.
“Tyler helped me put away today’s delivery.”
“And Scott?” he asks.
“To be honest, he was holed up in his office doing accounting, but Tyler’s a big help in the storeroom and out front.”
He makes his best effort to look interested.
“Right…Tyler is a good friend. Good people, his family.” He reflects on his words for a few moments.
“Why didn’t you invite him out to the bar you went to on Saturday? You went dancing, right?” he asks. I can’t figure out if he thinks there might be a spark between us, or if he’s just trying to egg me on, to get Vuk out of the picture.
“No, Jeff. I didn’t go out to dance.” I assure him. Dancing is way, way beyond my capabilities.
“But you would have had fun with Tyler,” he says encouragingly. His enthusiasm falls on deaf ears. It’s not hard to guess that Jeff would prefer me to hang out with Tyler, an apparently normal person. I try to regain my composure.
“He would have been bored stiff. I don’t dance. I can’t risk my neck out on the dance floor, so I just sat at the bar,” I reply, totally dismayed at the mere thought of dancing.
“Yeah, right,” he sniggers. He’s disappointed, but glad my comments were not an outright refusal to go out with Tyler.
“And…what about Bryan?” he ponders aloud.
“Jeff! He just started seeing my friend Jamie. And don’t ask about Seth, Ronald’s son. He’s going out with Tess. Plus, you know full well that I’m not looking to meet other boys. I’m with Jason.”
“Right…” He stretches out the word sarcastically, “Really?” He crosses his arms, never tearing his eyes from mine.
I nod slowly, trying not to give anything away about how sensitive a time it is right now for us, how this distance between us is torture. “Ah, yes” he says, ironically. “Really?” He keeps his arms crossed, his eyes locked on mine. I nod, calmly, and try not to give anything away. The moment is delicate and I feel distance between us.
“Whatever happened to him?” Jeff asks. “I haven’t seen him since last week.”
Exactly. He looks at me square in the eyes and understands what I’m going through.
“What happened, Ella May?” he whispers. “He seemed too kind to stand you up like that. Well, he seemed to care.”
“Yes, exactly. There must have been a mistake. He went hiking with Aaron in the mountains, east of the Canadian border.” It’s not too far from the truth. “He’ll be back in the next few days.”
“Ah, I understand” he mumbles. “And you…are you ok?”
“I’m a little worried about Jason,” I say in deep thought. I can see in his eyes he is perplexed and I feign some enthusiasm.
“But he’s ok, he’s back in Boston now and…”
”Yes” interrupts Jeff. “I know that he’s working in the financial district at Aaron Dale’s Bank. You know, people talk… and rumors spread. He’s become part of the family, of their financial empire, to be exact.” Well, it is probable that Jeff knows Aaron, after all. His presence in the high finance reception photos on Lake Michigan leaves no doubt.
“But now that Aaron is camping and hiking with Jason, who is in charge at the bank?” I ask.
“Preston Rooney, or someone for him” answers Jeff. “He’s part of the Dale family. He is as well-known as Aaron in the financial district.”
“Jeff, you are confused. Preston, Aaron’s brother, and Rooney are not the same person.”
“Yes they are” he replies. “To tell you the truth, the complete name is Preston Logan Rooney.” I open my mouth to say something but he interrupts me. “Yes, it’s him. The young proprietor of Rooney Investments.”
“The job interview is next week.” I say quietly to myself. That is why Donn was not enthused about my internship at Preston’s. I would have become part of the Dale family. I wonder if the job interview is still on, now that I know the truth, now that I know that Jason was able to find me through side ways. He risked his life in the library courtyard. Jeff’s face changes.
“Anyway, it’s better this way for Jason. He’s very lucky to have been adopted by the Dales after that trip to South America. Strange decision, suddenly. Do you know what happened to him?” Jeff asks with curiosity. “More than a year has gone by since I saw him last at the reception on Lake Michigan.”
“I think he needed to try and live somewhere else. He needed to do that before he started to work in Boston.”
“I wonder how worried his parents are,” Jeff says. “To disappear like that, suddenly, with just a sleeping bag, without a word. Very difficult, whatever the reason for leaving.”
“I don’t agree,” I say quickly to end the discussion. If he only knew the real reason why Jason left. “His intentions were pure.”
“Regardless, I don’t think there is a need to be as worried about Jason as you are,” Jeff continues. “A guy who reacts this way, with all this energy and focus, has to be able to start over. As hard as things have been for him this past year.”
“Yes, you’re right,” I sigh.
“Listen, Stella.” He falters, as if not wanting to reveal something. “He’s a well-mannered kid. I will try to remember that. I can’t promise anything, though.” He smiles. “But do something for me, please. Be careful. Scott wanted me to tell you that they’ll keep an eye on you.”
This is old news.
“It’s silly… but if it makes you happy, then yes, I promise.”
Jeff nods and stretches his arms, relieved.
“Okay,” I say and pause, perplexed. Inevitably, I think about Tyler’s secret, about Donn, and the tou
r of Wolfeboro’s forest with Vuk that afternoon.
“Is there something else on your mind?” Jeff asks from the foyer.
“No, I’m just tired. I’m going to bed.”
“Ok, Ella May, goodnight.” He senses I don’t want to talk about it anymore.
I head up the staircase slowly. Even Jeff has not made the fuss I was expecting in rushing me to bed, despite being as tired as I am. I head to my room and shut the door, pressing it to the wooden frame. It closes with a slight crash because of the air pressing against it.
As soon as my father’s loud rumblings stop, I head to the closet to find something practical to wear. I find a hoodie that I used to wear with my shorts to go running. I think I have finally hung up my ballerina shoes to a nail on the wall, and have given up classical dancing. I stand still, leaning against the closet door, waiting for the fog to return.
The hunt will resume tomorrow when Drake, Noah, and Jeremy, along with the other cousins, will head to White Mountain. It will happen while Vuk heads to the meeting with Donn in the library.
We did not reach an agreement as far as wolves are concerned. But at least he knows now, and there are no secrets. But I can’t still cross the border officially. Vuk is in trouble and he needs me. I can’t even think about it. I’m even more upset when I try to call Jason and he doesn’t answer. When he’s hunting, he leaves his cell at home.
At that moment I hear something hit the window and I turn. Taking a deep breath, I head toward what I’m seeing––my out-of-focus reflection in the dark.
I move toward it and open the window. The air is surprisingly cold, as if in winter. While in the dense forest, protected by the thick branches, I hadn’t noticed. Maybe it was because of Vuk’s warmth nearby. It warms me more than open flames. Icy drops of water splatter on my face, as the rain keeps falling.
It’s too dark to see anything ahead of the dark shadows of the trees that move and dance in the wind. I search through the shadows for other outlines and I see a pale figure moving through the darkness. My eyes are too tired and the rain is too thick. Then I feel a presence near me in the dark, and Vuk slides in through the window. His steps are muffled and his hands are wet from the rain, but as hot as fire. He grabs my waist and pulls me to him.
“How did it go with your guarantor tonight?”
“Nothing much, the usual. We didn’t get anything accomplished.”
“Hmm, I imagined something a bit more exciting. But at least now he knows.”
I nod. I feel Vuk’s strong presence, his strong protective embrace around me, as steady as a rock. I glance at his face. It’s calm and collected but his gaze shows his torment.
“You’re upset, and it’s because of me,” he whispers. “You didn’t do anything wrong, Stella.” He puts a hand on my shoulder so I can lean against his arm. “Donn is only trying to help you, in his own way. And trying to win your affection, of course.”
While he speaks, his tone changes and he becomes stiff as a statue of unparalleled, perfect beauty. For a moment I stand silent, struck by the topaz and emerald reflection in his eyes.
“What have you been up to tonight?”
After a brief silence, he chooses his words carefully.
“Nothing exciting, I was in the pickup listening to my music.”
An answer ordinary enough to surprise me. Curiosity takes over.
“Another Alternative?”
Even he seems surprised.
“Is it your favorite?”
“Sure” I nod, smiling timidly.
“It’s my favorite, too,” he whispers. He takes me in his arms and whispers decisively in my ear. “I found great inspiration listening to it, to come through the window.”
His breath smells of sweet mint and I quiver. It masks the smell of cigarettes. He never smokes in front of me and wants to hide it from me.
I feel his warm finger under my chin trying to raise it, so he can take a better look at my face. He seems relaxed.
“Have you changed your mind, or do you still think you are in danger?” I ask cautiously. “How silly of you.”
While I wait for an answer my heart beats so fast, it hurts.
Vuk sighs and stares intently at me while his hand moves along my waist.
“Don’t be ridiculous, Stella,” he says decisively, disapprovingly. For sure he knows to what I’m referring. I move closer to nestle my head in the nook between his shoulder and his neck, feeling unwelcome by that embrace. For a brief moment, with a simple glance, my lips sense the vibration of his skin. His breath is anxious and his heartbeat is irregular.
“I’ll tell you what’s also dangerous,” he continues. “One of these days I will die of spontaneous combustion. And you won’t have anyone to blame other than yourself.”
I move away, slightly. Vuk holds on tight and pulls me toward him. I feel his gentle smile as he kisses my forehead with soft lips.
“What are you doing?” he objects, holding me tight. His tone reminds me of how hard it is for him to not know what I’m thinking.
“I am protecting you from spontaneous combustion.” I hold back my breath and look up to see a serious and confused look on his face. My words startle him, and he seems surprised as he loses his poise. He glances at me suspiciously but then smiles.
“Don’t be worried,” he whispers.
I laugh at his smirking. He shakes his head and becomes serious.
“I prefer to burn than to move away from the flame. Instead of taking away oxygen, it feeds my breath.” His lips stay close to my skin and move to my cheek.
“I’m afraid that moving away from you could be so upsetting to keep me from being myself. It would make me unable to desire you as I do.”
I try to find the right words, but I’m unable to find any.
“Vuk…”
I shake my head slowly. It doesn’t seem like I’m rejecting him. It does not reflect the feeling that rages through me and shines through my eyes. It seems more of a surrender. He leans toward my lips, slowly and indecisively, and my heart starts beating furiously. I put my hands around his jaw and he believes I’m about to reject him. He’s wrong. I study his face. His eyes show his torment and desperation as never before.
“You know why I’m saying no.” I can’t imagine my life without his friendship. “You know I want you in my life.”
“Really?” He whispers an inch away from my lips, a hint of sarcasm in his voice.
“Yes, of course!” I turn my head to kiss his hair, wet by the rain. I hope this was not a last kiss, like one of those you get before the beginning of an separation. His face and lips go back and forth on my cheek. I throw my arms around his neck and hold on tight.
As he comes in contact with my warm skin, his body becomes more feverish than usual. I heat up, but not because of the temperature. He desires my lips as much as I desire to embrace him.
“I miss it,” he says, and breathes in deeply. “I miss how everything was a lot simpler. Just you and I, no complications. I remember that time well.”
His words have set the memories in motion and he senses the sudden tension in my body.
“Vuk, it won’t always be like this,” I assure him. The words fall quickly out of my mouth. I see a perplexed expression in his eyes. A moment later, his facial expression changes. He wrinkles his forehead, and I’m no longer sensing indecision or willingness to compromise on his part.
“Be reasonable, Stella.” He breathes anxiously and irregularly. He leans down to whisper in my ear. “It will never be the same as long as Donn is there.”
I would like to run away. My stomach is upset, my eyes teary. I breathe in deeply, trying to regain some balance. A strong sensation gets a hold of me, and as that feeling of powerlessness begins to dissipate, I fall into a different emotion. It takes me a while to understand why I was timidly looking away and blushing. It was as if I had been staring at the future. I feel terribly upset by it, nauseated.
“Blood, and more blood,” I whisper. Q
uickly Vuk covers my mouth as I continue to talk senselessly. Will their rivalry ever end? Could one of them survive the other, I hear my own voice echoing though my head. I’m forced to pull away from his embrace to regain my breath. He lowers the hand that was covering my mouth to my chin as he raises my face to his, and looks into my eyes. He holds me in a tight embrace with the other hand.
“What’s wrong?” He asks, confused. He’s not letting me move an inch. While I stare at him, he becomes pensive. He anticipates my response before I can speak.
“Speaking of complications…” I can’t pronounce this word without smirking. “Why can’t you behave with Donn? Would you mind telling me what was on your mind earlier? He was not too pleased. He’s trying to be polite.”
I want an answer and I want to be kind. Vuk shrugs as his face lights up.
“I was only thinking of you,” he laughs.
“Me? What did I have to do with it?” My voice reflects my confusion.
“It took weeks to regain human form after the full moon. It’s a painful memory for me. And it is also my fault. That night still haunts me, you know?” Vuk breaks into a painful growl. “I was thinking about your appearance, back when I found you in Jeff’s office the night of the party. And I remembered that you were trying to curl up trying to maintain calm. I bet you don’t have the faintest idea of the condition you were in, Stella. Then I remembered the first time that you saw Jeff again. The joy that neither Donn nor I were able to give you. I was mad, and I thought that I should make him understand, because of the pain he caused you, to stay away from you, as I should.”
“No, Vuk! You’re being silly. And don’t say that ever again. Promise me. I don’t want you two fighting because of me.”
“Are you kidding? I haven’t had such good times in months,” he laughs.
I hit him on the arm, jokingly.
“Please help me, Vuk. I hurt my hand.”
“Ok, relax,” he whispers. “Do you think I will see him again soon, in similar circumstances? Don’t worry. Besides, I should let you go to sleep now, even if you are not tired.”