by Ariel Tachna
The bottle warmer did as it promised, heating the bottle evenly and rapidly. Jaime was tempted to ask if he could feed her, but he figured it was too early for that, so he passed her back to her father and watched with a smile as she fed eagerly.
“Is the food here yet?” Nathaniel’s voice interrupted the moment of peace.
“It’s on the table,” Jaime said softly, his eyes not leaving Srikkanth and Sophie. “You can take it into your room so we don’t keep you from your studies.”
Nathaniel scowled as he dug in the sack and pulled out his meal, but he didn’t say anything else, disappearing back into his room as Srikkanth burped Sophie before giving her the rest of her meal.
“I don’t think he likes her,” Srikkanth commented softly when Nathaniel’s bedroom door shut again.
“I don’t think he likes much of anything that might keep him from studying,” Jaime joked. “He’s always glaring at me if I have company over.”
“It’s been too long since I last had anyone I wanted to have over,” Srikkanth replied. “I guess I haven’t had the pleasure of him scowling at me for that reason, but he pays his rent on time, helps around the place, and isn’t a slob. I’d say we’re still coming out ahead.”
“Oh, definitely,” Jaime agreed, thinking about Nathaniel’s predecessor, who’d left dirty dishes and dirty laundry and a few less pleasant things strewn all over the common areas of the condo. “Here, give her to me for a bit so you can eat your dinner before it gets cold.”
“What about your dinner?” Srikkanth asked.
“I perfected the art of eating one-handed a long time ago,” Jaime replied, reaching for Sophie. “Now, are you going to share?”
Srikkanth hesitated for a moment before agreeing. “I suppose it’s all right. She didn’t seem to mind you holding her a bit ago. She screamed her head off when I gave her to Nathaniel.”
Jaime settled Sophie in the crook of his arm. “And why would you do that?”
“Because she’d spit up all over my shirt,” Srikkanth explained, pulling containers out of the bag and setting them out on the table. “He offered to hold her while I changed clothes.”
“That was nice of him,” Jaime agreed. “So she didn’t care for that?”
“Not at all.”
“Well, I’m glad she likes me,” Jaime said, leaning down and kissing her forehead softly, feeling his heart swell in his chest.
Chapter 6
Srikkanth was at his wits’ end. After dinner, he’d taken Sophie back upstairs to sleep. She’d snuggled into her napper and gone straight to sleep. Now, an hour later, she was screaming for no reason Srikkanth could figure out. She refused a bottle; her diaper was clean; he’d checked to make sure her clothes weren’t pinching her anywhere. He’d walked with her, sung to her, rocked her as much as he could—everything he could think of, and still she screamed. So he started over, with no success. When he was just about ready to admit defeat, Jaime appeared in his doorway.
“Give her to me,” Jaime said. “Go for a run or something to get a break.”
“But—”
“My sister had colic, and when she got like this, all we could do was take turns so no one threw her against the wall,” Jaime insisted. “She’s going to keep screaming whether you’re here or not. Take a break and you can try again to calm her down when you get back.”
Srikkanth hesitated a moment longer, but his frustration level was getting high. A short run would do him good, restoring his patience if nothing else. He hoped so, anyway. With a sigh and a kiss on Sophie’s forehead, he passed her to Jaime, only to have her screams redouble in volume. He made to take her back, but Jaime shook his head. “I’ll be fine for fifteen or twenty minutes. Go for a short run.”
Quickly, before Jaime had time to change his mind, Srikkanth pulled on his running gear and headed downstairs. Nathaniel intercepted him before he reached the door.
“I told you this was a bad idea,” he snapped. “How am I supposed to study if she’s screaming like that?”
“I don’t know,” Srikkanth said, running out the door before his roommate could say anything else. He wanted to believe Jaime and trust that loving Sophie would be enough to make up for all his ignorance and inexperience, but Nathaniel’s negativity was more immediate, more real. Far easier to accept. He obviously couldn’t take care of Sophie, or she wouldn’t be upstairs screaming her head off. She was a baby. She wasn’t old enough to scream just to be difficult. If she was that upset, something was wrong. His feet hit the pavement in a steady rhythm as he tried to clear his thoughts and forget everything but the exhilaration of his run. His thoughts weren’t as easily left behind as the sound of Sophie’s screaming.
The nurse at the hospital said she was a happy baby, but her first night home with him, she was already inconsolable. He didn’t think he’d done anything to upset her, but he didn’t really have any way to know other than to compare the way she was acting now with the way she’d acted at the hospital. He certainly hadn’t seen her fuss like this at the hospital. Maybe she missed the nurses? She’d been with them far more than she’d been with him.
He couldn’t take her back to the hospital, though. He’d committed to rearing her, and now he had to follow through. He just wished he knew how. He supposed he could call his mother, but that would mean explaining the situation, why he hadn’t told them about the baby sooner, and all the rest. He’d have to tell them eventually because he couldn’t very well keep his daughter secret from her grandparents all her life, but he needed a few days to get used to the idea of being a father before he tried to explain everything to his parents.
Feeling guilty for leaving Jaime with his problem, Srikkanth cut short his usual circuit, simply circling the condo complex instead of taking his usual route around the neighborhood. When he arrived back at home, he paused for a moment on the doorstep, steeling his nerves to return to Sophie’s screaming. Opening the door, however, he heard only silence.
He frowned as he climbed the steps, wondering where Jaime had taken Sophie. When he reached his bedroom, though, Jaime sat on the bed, Sophie cradled in his arms. He lifted a finger to his lips and gestured for Srikkanth to go back downstairs. Standing carefully, he set Sophie gently in her napper and slipped from the room, shutting the door behind him.
“She fell asleep about five minutes after you left,” Jaime whispered. “I think she was exhausted.”
“Or she likes you better,” Srikkanth said bitterly.
Jaime shook his head immediately. “Don’t even think that,” he insisted, leading Srikkanth into his room next door so they could talk without disturbing Sophie. “Babies get colic. Some of them get it worse than others, but it happens. There isn’t anything you can do about it except what we did: hold her ’til she wears herself out and falls asleep. It doesn’t make it any easier to listen to her scream, but you didn’t do anything wrong. I promise.”
“I just feel so helpless,” Srikkanth complained, knowing it made him sound whiny but beyond caring. “She wasn’t like this at the hospital. The nurses said she was a quiet baby, not fussy at all.”
“Sri, she’s three days old,” Jaime reminded him. “She’s not old enough to make that kind of generalizations about. And even if she were, babies’ personalities change as they develop just like other people’s do. Her first night home is probably a part of it, yes, but that doesn’t mean you did anything wrong. No matter what you’d decided for her, she’d have left the hospital eventually, which means she’d have to deal with a new environment. You made the right choice. It won’t always be easy, but you’ll make it work.”
“You’re so sure of it,” Srikkanth marveled.
Jaime shrugged, not sure how to put into words what he was feeling. “Babies belong with their parents,” he said after a moment. “I know adoption works, and I certainly don’t want kids growing up in abusive or neglectful situations, but this isn’t like that. You have the means to take care of her, and I can tell you already love h
er. Next to that, everything else is a technicality. All parents make mistakes, especially with the first baby, because they don’t know what they’re doing. Most of them are pure ignorance and nothing to really worry about.”
“And the ones that aren’t?” Srikkanth demanded.
Jaime shrugged. “The ones that are more serious are almost always negligent if not worse. You may be more inexperienced than most, but you don’t have it in you to be negligent. If you’re really worried about something, ask me. If I don’t know, I’ll call my mama. She knows everything, and she’s closer than your mother.”
“Does she have a cure for colic?” Srikkanth asked with a soft laugh. “Since I failed spectacularly with that one today.”
“I don’t know if she does or not. Let’s see what we can look up and if we don’t find anything, I’ll call her,” Jaime proposed.
Srikkanth nodded. It hadn’t even occurred to him to search online because he hadn’t known what was wrong, but now that he had a name for the problem, he could figure out what to do for it. His computer was in his room, though, and he didn’t want to risk Sophie waking up before he knew what to do for her. “Can I use your computer?”
“Of course,” Jaime exclaimed. “Come on. Let’s see what we can find.”
They flipped open Jaime’s laptop and started searching. An hour later, they had a list of options to try, ranging from swaddling and cuddling with her to startling her out of her crying with the vacuum cleaner to taking her for a walk to get a change of scenery. About the time they finished searching, Sophie woke up. Srikkanth steeled himself for another fit like before, but she settled down as soon as he gave her a bottle. When she was done, she smuggled into his arms, watching him owlishly. Srikkanth rolled his eyes at Jaime. “What’s this?” he joked.
“She was testing you,” Jaime grinned. “She wanted to see if you could figure out what to do with her.”
“I think we all could’ve done without that,” Srikkanth said drolly. “Nathaniel in particular.”
“Did he say something?” Jaime asked sharply.
“Yeah, he snarled at me as I was leaving.”
“I know what you can do about Nathaniel,” Jaime said with a moue of disgust. “Ignore him. You already know what he’s like, and if you weren’t upset about Sophie, you wouldn’t have given his comment a second thought.”
“I know,” Srikkanth replied, “but I was upset about Sophie, and he does live here. We knew when he moved in that he wanted a quiet place to live. That’s why you moved up here—so he could have the downstairs bedroom and be away from more of the noise.”
“Whose name is on the deed?” Jaime demanded. “Yours, not his. He can deal with it or find another place to live.”
It wasn’t quite that simple. Srikkanth depended on the rent from his housemates to pay the mortgage on the condo, especially now that he was going to have the extra expense of a baby. He’d have to look for a smaller place if Nathaniel and Jaime moved out. He wasn’t going to worry about that tonight, though. He had enough to worry about with Sophie and getting through the night.
The days fell into a routine for Srikkanth, sleeping when Sophie slept, feeding her every two hours, grabbing a bite to eat when he could. Somewhat to his surprise, he found that he didn’t miss work at all, his fascination with Sophie sufficient to fill his days. The suggestions for dealing with colic seemed to work far better during the day than at night. Jaime continued to be Srikkanth’s rock, taking Sophie for half an hour or more each night so Srikkanth could get in a run.
For his part, Jaime enjoyed the time he spent with Sophie, even beginning to seek excuses to spend more time with her and Srikkanth. When she wasn’t colicky, she was an engaging baby, her personality becoming clearer and clearer with each passing day. He hated to hear her cry, more because he knew how much it upset Srikkanth than because it bothered him. He knew enough about babies to understand that she was uncomfortable and that it would pass, so he simply held her and rocked her or walked her around the house until she quieted down or until Srikkanth returned from his run. He’d also gotten really good at ignoring Nathaniel’s glares and deflecting his comments before they could upset Srikkanth even more.
About three weeks after Sophie came home from the hospital, Jaime went upstairs as usual to take Sophie so Srikkanth could go for a run. The sight that met his eyes stole his breath and made his heart pound faster in his chest. Srikkanth sat on his bed, bare to the waist, Sophie in only her diaper cradled to his chest. Srikkanth’s skin was dark against Sophie’s slightly paler coloring.
“You’re going to spoil her,” Jaime said, trying to keep his voice steady. He’d seen Srikkanth shirtless before, but not often and always in the process of changing clothes rather than simply sitting around without a top. At the moment, though, Srikkanth didn’t seem to have any intention of getting dressed, and that was doing all manner of things to Jaime’s libido. He reminded himself that he had a boyfriend of sorts at the moment, but it wasn’t like he was acting on the sudden attraction. There wasn’t any harm in acknowledging another man’s attractiveness if he didn’t do anything but look, was there?
“The nurse at the hospital said I should hold her this way,” Srikkanth replied calmly. “She said bottle-fed babies don’t get skin-to-skin contact while they’re nursing, so they need it at other times to help with bonding.” He sent Jaime a beatific smile that went straight to Jaime’s cock. “I don’t know if it’s doing her any good, but it certainly feels good to me. She’s so soft and smooth.”
Staring at Srikkanth’s chest, Jaime thought Sophie wasn’t the only one who was smooth.
The doorbell rang, followed swiftly by Nathaniel yelling for Jaime. “Your date’s here.”
“Shit,” Jaime muttered, forgetting for a moment that Sophie was in the room. “Shoot, sorry, Sri. I’ll have to get used to watching my mouth again. I forgot I was supposed to go out with Randy tonight. I can see if he’d mind waiting so you can still get in your run.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Srikkanth replied, leaning down and kissing Sophie’s cheek. “We’ll be fine for tonight. Go enjoy your date. We’ll be here when you get home.”
Jaime nodded, backing out of the room slowly, wishing he didn’t have to leave. When they’d made the date, Sophie hadn’t been in the picture and he’d been looking forward to seeing Beecake at a local pub, but now, he wanted nothing more than to stay home and spend his uninterrupted hour with Sophie. There was nothing to be done for it. Randy was here, and they’d already paid for the tickets and made dinner reservations at the club. He’d just have to cajole Srikkanth into letting him spend a little extra time with her over the next few days. It was Friday. Maybe he could even steal her for a few hours tomorrow, since he didn’t have to work.
“I’ll just be a few minutes,” he called down to Randy. “I’m not quite ready.”
He changed clothes quickly into something more appropriate for a night out than the jeans and sweatshirt he was currently wearing, thinking the entire time how much more comfortable he’d be if he could just stay home. Before he went down the stairs to join Randy, he peeked in Srikkanth’s room again to get one more glimpse of him and Sophie together to hold him through the evening. If that wasn’t a sad state of affairs, he didn’t know what was.
As he suspected, Randy was sitting impatiently on the couch in the living room waiting for him. “What took you so long?” he snapped.
“I was helping Srikkanth with something,” Jaime replied, not really wanting to get into an explanation of Sophie and everything else. She was too special to share, and somehow he doubted Randy would get it any more than Nathaniel did.
Randy huffed in annoyance, but Jaime ignored him. He’d been looking forward to the chance to see Billy Boyd and his band in concert since he’d heard they were coming to town and he refused to let his “date” ruin that, even if he’d already decided he wouldn’t have time for another night out any time soon should the other man ask. Maybe—Jaime hoped
it wasn’t just wishful thinking—Randy would be annoyed enough with his tardiness and general uncommunicativeness to refrain from trying to set another date. If not, Jaime had the perfect excuse. He’d simply tell Randy he had to babysit for Sophie.
When the concert ended four hours later, Jaime had to admit he was glad he’d gone. The pub had delivered on its promise of an intimate setting, only seating about one hundred fifty people total, and the table he and Randy had reserved ended up being about ten feet from the stage. While they were waiting to get in, Billy Boyd had come out front to sign autographs and shoot the breeze with his fans. Once they’d gotten inside and the band came out, the evening had only gotten better. Billy chatted to the crowd like they were close personal friends, even exchanging quips with a group of women a few tables back that had Jaime doubled over laughing. The music had been spectacular, and Jaime had enjoyed every minute of the show.