Julia nodded, her gaze narrowing. "Yes, they are Starry children."
"Well, if y'all don't get pushed around." She nodded her head like she figured it all out now. "I knew both of your real mamas. I saw that Starry woman come to town with a baby after that woman died. I know what happened. She had that bastard's kid." She pointed to David. "You are that bastard child, ain't you?"
Julia's mouth dropped open, having no words to say. What was the woman talking about? She had never heard that kind of hatred and been accused in such a way before. She pulled David closer, who looked confused. He would be. He had never heard those words before.
Suddenly Matt walked up like he had been doing rounds. He took David in his arms. He stared at the rich woman with authority. "Why don’t you think before you speak? And stop spreadin’ such lies! God will judge you for bein’ so hateful to others." He took Johnathan's hand and led them to the office.
Julia walked in the back door of the sheriff’s office, into Matt’s living quarters, still stunned. What was that woman talking about? She had never heard those lies before. Matt told the kids to sit at the table and went back to the office.
Julia poured the children some buttermilk and cut each a piece of cake. She felt guilty as she leaned against the head chair. “I am sorry for what happened. I shouldn’t have reacted like that. I am sorry.”
Charity touched her hand comfortingly. “It’s fine. You were just surprised by what that horrible lady said.”
Julia gave her a sad smile and then looked at David. “What that lady said is not true.”
David looked calm, “What does bastard mean?”
“Uncle Frank used to call me a bastard,” Melody whispered.
Julia gasped. She could tell Melody didn’t know what that meant. Charity went pale. She walked over to give Melody a side hug. “I am sorry about that. No one will call you that again.” She looked at the boys. “It means a person's parents are not married. Both of your parents loved each other very much. It's not a good word.”
“It’s a swear word?” Jonathan asked.
Julia wasn’t sure how to answer. “Yes, it’s a bad word we don’t ever use.”
Both boys bobbed their heads in agreement.
A little while later, Cole walked in. He greeted all the children and led Julia to another room. He held her. "Oh, honey. I am so sorry this happened. I am sorry I wasn't there."
Julia pushed away. "No, it was my fault. I said nothing. I didn't defend him. I just froze. I didn't do..."
Cole put a finger on her lips. "No, this was not your fault. You just didn't expect it."
"Who would? She was so mean. Why did she say those things?" Tears came to her eyes.
"Because she believes David is Ellen's tummy child." Matt stood by the door.
"No." Her eyes were wide. She had never heard of such a thing. "Why? Why would she think that?"
Matt put his hands in his pockets. "Because Ellen came to town with David, after Ben and Missy passed. While she was here, she nursed him." His jaw popped. "I didn't understand it but they accused her of having Ben’s child. They said David and Johnathan were twins."
Julia's mouth dropped open. How could they accuse her mother of such a thing? The boys were five months apart, David being the younger. Sitting on the bed, she cried. She wasn't a woman of many tears. She was still learning to let her pain out in tears. As always, Cole was there for a hug and a shoulder to cry on. She cried for a mama she would never see on this side of heaven.
Chapter 4
The sun was high in the sky by the time Katrina woke up. Feeling Andrew’s empty pillow beside her was odd. He had liked meeting the girls, Sara and Francesca, and he was ready to jump in with both feet and raise them. Katrina was equally excited. After three days with the girls she had finally slept in.
After dressing in a simple dress, she went to the girl's room across from her room and found it empty. They must be downstairs eating. In the kitchen she didn't see them; she headed outside and found Andrew in the barn milking the cow. "Andrew, have you seen the girls?" she asked, her voice high pitched.
Andrew stood up and faced her. "No, I haven't. I thought after the girls had a rough night, they were still sleepin’."
Katrina nodded. "Let's ask the Alexanders to help look. Their boys can ride the land."
Andrew looked doubtful. "They might be out for a walk."
"Francesca hates walking." Katrina shook her head. "I know somethin’ is wrong."
He nodded. "Fine." He handed her the milk pail. "I will go get the Alexanders. I will leave you a saddled horse."
Her hands shook as she strained the milk. Where did the girls go? Were they hiding by the creek? Maybe hiding out in town? They could be anywhere and were used to being on their own. How had the girls come to mean so much to her this soon? Is this how Ellen had felt about the children she’d taken in?
In the barn, she could smell the grain, and the manure pile by the back of the barn. Mounting her small bay horse, she decided to take the south pasture near the road. What if Francesca's boss had found her, and forced her back into that life? What if someone took them? What if they got hurt? God would direct her to the girls. She thought of her future with the girls. What would it hold? She hated that the girls were in danger. She wanted to make sure they were safe all the time. She wanted to have tea parties, late-night talks, to show these children some love. Did she love them? She wasn't sure if she loved them yet. It was too soon to see if she did. Ellen always said love was a choice and not always a feeling. Sometimes feelings came later. She began praying for God to help her find the children. They could be an actual family.
Soon she spotted Mabel and her children on the road. Tears came to her eyes. They began their search.
HAVING HAD MANY SIBLINGS that ran away every few months, Katrina was used to looking for people. But having never searched for her own children, she hadn’t been prepared for such fear in her heart. She and the others had searched in valleys, along rivers, in old buildings and barns of neighbors, in meadows, and on more land Katrina hadn’t known existed. After getting some coffee, Mabel asked her to take a walk. Her children stayed with Andrew, doing chores.
Mabel spoke first. "When you find the girls, what is your plan? The children will want to know what is happening in their life. Do you want to raise them?"
Katrina shrugged. "I like the girls, Francesca is sweet and scared. Sara is so lost and afraid."
Mabel nodded. "They are sweet, very needy girls. But you might not see them again."
Katrina flinched. "That is what I am afraid of. What if Fran ends up with her old boss? She hasn't spoken of it, but I can see that life. And Sara could get into that life."
Mabel sighed. "Yes, they could. Women and girls alone are in a dangerous situation, especially in the West." They walked into what would be Cole's knew house. It was a bit dusty but pretty clean.
Katrina closed her eyes against the truth. "You could say that again." She softly smiled. "I am glad I met you. You have become a good friend."
Mabel smiled. "I have been praying for whoever moved here. It was God's providential plan. You keep me young." She chuckled. "Now, what do you say we look here again?"
"I did this mornin’," Katrina told her. She could hear the wood creak below her. The house made noises only an older house could make.
"Well, you might have, but my friend owned this ranch; we sat here drinking coffee many times." She took Katrina's hand. "I have an idea." She and Katrina walked down the hallway of Cole’s house. The house would be ready for him when they moved to the territory in a few months. The walls and floors were bare. Katrina could imagine Julia’s art on all the walls, the furniture, and bright colorful rugs on the floors. It would be a beautiful house one day. One they would share with neighbors. They walked into what looked like the master bedroom. Mabel acted like she knew the place well. She moved the thin dirty rug with her boot and then Katrina saw a trapdoor. Mabel gave her a knowing look, then reac
hed down and pulled it up.
Chaos broke loose. Francesca jumped up and tried to get out the door but Mabel ran and stood in front of it. Nothing could get past her arms of steel. Thankfully, the girls didn’t go for the windows.
Sara came out slowly, carefully, as if they would beat her. Katrina knew how that was.
Then another girl came out, much younger, maybe around seven. She looked worse for wear than both of the other girls put together; bug bites covered her legs and arms, her hair hung in greasy knots that would take hours to clean out. Her dress was in rags, really just strips of fabric. Her feet were bleeding. She screamed and ran for the door, running into Mabel. Mabel wrapped her arms around the young child while she continued to scream and fight.
The screaming didn't bother Katrina much, she was used to loud noises, her family was loud. As she looked over the child her stomach tightened to make her sick. She had never seen a child in such a terrible condition. Mabel was talking over the screaming like she knew what she was doing. "Easy child. It's all right. Calm down, my child."
Katrina thought everyone’s ears would start bleeding by the time the girl stopped screaming. Her eyes went vacant and her shoulders drooped. She still banged her head on the wall as Mabel held her. She looked ready to kill. Mabel told her, "Stop fighting and I'll let you go so we can chat."
The girl nodded. She started breathing heavily like she couldn't get her breath, though Mabel let her go and she turned to face them.
They all sat on the ground. Mabel asked softly, "What is your name, sweetie?"
The girl swore.
Francesca frowned. "Her name is Carlissa."
"Well, that is a nice name." Katrina smiled at Carlissa, then spoke to Francesca, "Why did you run away? We've been lookin’ everywhere for y'all."
Francesca shrugged. "We ain't staying at your house. We don't want to live in no orphanage or asylum!"
Carlissa moved away, covering her face with shaking hands like she could hide from them. Her breath came out rough like she couldn’t catch her breath.
"You are not goin’ to an asylum!" Katrina told them. "I would never send you to an asylum."
"Then what do you plan to do with us?" Francesca asked.
Katrina looked at Mabel, then back at the girls. "Andrew and I have been talking about you living with us. We have been prayin’ about it." She paused. "My brother-in-law owns the Liberty House, and it is a nice place."
Francesca snorted. "You ever been or lived in one? It couldn't be any worse than a brothel."
Katrina flinched at her response.
Francesca got closer to Katrina's face. Her own face red, jaw set hard, hands in fists. "So you haven't seen this orphanage or an orphanage you plan to send us to. I bet you lived in this perfect little world where nothing bad ever happened with that family of yours." She cursed. "Well, it ain't like that for the lot of us, some don't get as lucky." She turned her face away like she couldn't stand to look at Katrina's shocked face any longer.
Katrina stared at her and saw the hardness, anger, pain, hurt, and the fear of not being wanted. She spoke lightly, "You're right, some don't get as lucky, but luck has nothing to do with it." She spoke with the girls. "Let's go home and get some food. I'm famished."
Francesca just glared.
Carlissa looked ready to run again, but she slowly came along with them as they left the house.
THE CHILDREN ATE A supper of fresh bread and salted pork with buttermilk. Katrina was relieved that Mabel stayed after sending her children to her daughter's farm. Katrina knew they needed to look at Carlissa's cuts and what looked like burns under the layers of dirt. It worried her that the girl had not yet said a thing, only moaned and screamed. She had only eaten a few bits of bread with her dirty hands.
While Andrew stayed home with the two older girls, Katrina grabbed a coat for Carlissa, then grabbed her own jacket and let Mabel take the lead to the doctor's office.
The doctor's clinic was neat and clean. Charles welcomed them in, giving his wife a look he had given her many times in the past. It could only be explained as being between a couple who had been through horrible times and still stood by each other no matter what. Katrina shared that look with Andrew often. Katrina picked Carlissa up and placed her on the table. She was light as a feather, and it made Katrina sick to her stomach. No child should be this thin.
As they looked at the cuts and burns, they got her bath water ready. Mabel went to the cabinet and got some bottles down, and what looked like ointment. So what are your plans now? With another child, it will get worse, Mabel signed.
Katrina felt tired but also at peace. Caring for the girls had given her a purpose like she had always wanted. She enjoyed having a purpose, a need to fill. She loved serving and living with Andrew, but she had been missing something for some time. Katrina signed back, I frankly don't know if I can get through today. Can we talk about it later?
Of course, it looks like it has been a long three days. She grinned a knowing smile.
It has. Tears came to Katrina's eyes, and she did not understand why.
Mabel put an arm around her and pulled her into a side hug. "I would say it will get better, but it doesn't." She spoke with her lips only.
Katrina looked at her confused, pulled away, and signed, What do you mean? They won't change? It won't get easier?
Mabel shrugged. "Not really. Not for a long time."
At that moment, Charles walked up and told them the water was ready.
Chapter 5
Katrina walked over to where Carlissa sat on the table. She looked like she had been through hell and not made it back. Her eyes showed an emptiness Katrina had never seen before, not even in the orphanage, but she hadn't been looking either. Could she have missed it? At the orphanage, she was trying to survive, and it wasn't long until she was at Silkwood. "Carlissa, let's say we take a bath? It's nice and warm," She whispered. "I just love baths. I took one right after I came here to get the horse smell off me. And my horses don't smell like roses, I'll tell you." She smiled brightly and helped her down and led her over to the bath.
Carlissa screamed and cried, though not a genuine cry, but muffled. She started breathing really heavily again.
Mabel walked up to them and told her to stop. She had a rag. She got on Carlissa's level. "Now sweetie, we will not hurt you. I am going to put this over your mouth and nose and you won't feel a thing, okay."
She looked at her hard, much more than any child should. "Wanna bet?"
Mabel put it to her noise as Charles stood behind her. Mabel moved just as Carlissa tried to punch her, then she passed out. Charles put her on the floor. Mabel undressed her from the rags she had on. "Katrina, would you come help me bathe her?" Mabel asked.
Katrina knew she would have to roll up her sleeves to do that. She looked at Mabel, deciding whether to get her sleeves wet or show the ugly scars.
Mabel stood up and walked over to Katrina, then took her hands. Katrina tried to pull away, but Mabel held on. "Katrina, I have seen scars before, it's just you and me. Trust me."
Katrina looked at the scars. "It's easier said than done."
"Yes, it is. Make that step, the choice is yours."
Mabel was right. The choice was hers. It was about trust. Katrina nodded, pulled her sleeves up to show the ugly gray and pink skin. Mabel acted like she didn't notice.
As Mabel and Katrina bathed her, Katrina saw that Carlissa had whip marks on her back, what looked like burns on her skin, and cuts that looked to be healed over leaving scars. On top of all that, she had bug bites that had left hard spots all over her body.
Katrina spoke softly. "I got burned in a cabin where I lived with the Starrys. The neighbors hated us, for many reasons - Andrew and I were slaves or because a black freed couple lived on our land, or we had two Spanish brothers. You name it, there was a reason. When the cabin caught fire, all the others got out safely. They didn't know I wasn't out yet. I got stuck under a beam, Andrew wouldn't leave withou
t me." She sighed. She had never told anyone. "Besides becomin’ burned, I lost most of my hearing. Andrew has as many scars as I do."
Mabel gave her a compassionate look. "I am sorry. They did nothing to those who did this to you," she stated.
Katrina shook her head. "We were slaves. Andrew's brother bought us out of it. Andrew said at least the fire didn't taint our beautiful faces." She smiled lightly.
Mabel laughed. “Good point.”
"Ellen and Missy helped me find my brother, Isaiah, after the war."
"So he didn't grow up with you and the Starry's?"
Katrina nodded. "I kept my last name O'Meara till I married Andrew." She looked back to where Charles worked on something in the backroom. “Why ain’t Charles helpin’?”
Mabel shrugged. “I have you to help me. We have worked with asylum children for years together. They ain’t nothing we haven’t seen.” She blinked back tears. “We can handle what happened to Carlissa. He has been working a lot lately.”
Katrina’s mouth went dry. “I am sorry for what you have seen.”
Mabel looked up, giving her a sad look, but then turned back to the little girl. "At least we know she can talk, though we might not want her to." She chuckled, though she didn't mean it.
Katrina smiled. "My sister didn't talk for two years and we funned her that when she finally talked, she would never stop."
"She didn't talk for two years?!"
"Yeah, we just learned to talk to her and for her. Ellen was patient and let her talk when she was ready."
Mabel smiled. "Sounds like a family put together by God and who stayed together through a lot."
You don't know the half of it. Katrina thought. "We made it through more than we thought possible." She sadly smiled. "I miss them at times like this. Maverick would know what to do. Gloria and Julia would know how to help them."
"You can learn how to help them."
Katrina said honestly, "I want to learn. I just don't know if I should take them without talking to the family. We should hear from them soon. I just have never made such a big decision without them."
Liberty Ranch Page 4