Yesterday

by Fern Michaels

  “I hate people who are smilingly cheerful so early in the morning. What time is it anyway?”

  “Ten minutes to seven. Pearl and I have been up for an hour.”

  Pearl and I have been up for an hour. Brie wanted to slap Sela’s smiling face. Instead she got up and shuffled to the bathroom. Pearl and I.

  She hadn’t really slept when she returned from the hospital. She’d tossed and turned on the narrow, scratchy couch, angry with herself for losing her temper. She was going to tell Pearl and Sela what she’d done. She knew better than to let her emotions crowd out her own good sense, but she’d done it anyway. Defending Bode. If Bode was standing right here he’d say he didn’t need defending from Wynfield Archer or anyone else. She’d try and defend herself, and he’d look at her with those steely eyes of his and say, sotto voce: “I’m disappointed in you, Brie.” At which point, she’d blubber like a kid. Well, goddammit, Bode wasn’t here, and it was a matter of honor with her. She didn’t feel one bit better when she took her place at the table.

  “You look terrible, chile. Didn’t you sleep well last night?”

  “I think I only slept for twenty minutes before Miss Cheerful woke me up. Look, I might as well tell you right now. I went to the hospital last night because I couldn’t sleep.” She concentrated on Pearl’s unhappy face as she told them both the tale.

  “You left Wyn handcuffed to some stranger’s car and drove away. You just drove away!” Sela gasped.

  “I’d like to hear what you would have done, Sela,” Brie snapped. “Are you saying you would have let that . . . that cretin call Bode trash?”

  “Of course not; but there are other ways of handling things. You are simply too physical. I guess I would have kicked him in the shins. That’s physical, but it isn’t the same as—God!”

  “What did Mr. Wyn say when you told him my baby was going to call off the wedding?” Pearl asked, her eyes brimming with tears.

  “He said he didn’t believe me. That man doesn’t like any of us. He tolerated us. I’ll bet you five bucks that somehow, some way, inside of six months, he’d have had Callie saying, ‘Brie who, Sela who, Bode who?’ He would have found a way to pension Pearl off and make it look like it was Callie’s idea.”

  “I thought you liked Wyn,” Sela said.

  “I did and I didn’t. I truly believe he loves Callie. Right now, that’s the only plus I can give him. I’ll tell you one thing for certain though. He’s scared out of his wits that we’re going to call Bode. Now, why is that? An accident is an accident.”

  “My boy wouldn’t do nothing to Mr. Wyn, ’lessen he did something wrong,” Pearl said quietly. “My boy is honorable.”

  “You are damn unbelievable,” Sela said, holding out her cup to Brie for more coffee.

  “Why don’t you get up and fetch it yourself,” Brie snapped, and Sela had the grace to look embarrassed. That’s it, Sela, start paving the way for Pearl to wait on you hand and foot. Miss Sela Carron, stand-in for Callie Parker. Miss Sela Carron Bronson of Parker Manor. She pushed her plate away and Pearl pushed it back, a frown on her face. Brie picked up her fork. All it took was one look from Pearl, and it was instant obedience on her part. It didn’t matter that she was over thirty and out on her own.

  “Are you upset with me, Pearl?” Brie murmured.

  “No, chile. You did what you thought was right at the time. I don’t think Mr. Wyn will hold it against you. What he called my boy, that don’t make no never mind. He has to live with hisself. The man has a good heart. He loves my baby.”

  “How are you going to face Wyn?” Sela asked.

  “I won’t have any trouble at all. Don’t expect me to apologize.”

  Sela shrugged. “Pearl, is all this okay with you?”

  “Everything is fine with me. All I want is to be near my baby.”

  Brie finished everything on her plate. She felt bloated, cranky, and miserable when she showered. It wasn’t going to be a good day; she could feel the tension between her shoulder blades. “What I should do,” she muttered as she plugged in her blow-dryer, “is call Bode. I’ve screwed up, so what’s one more thing?” That one more thing, her conscience pricked, is the look you’ll see in Pearl’s eyes.

  Brie was standing in the kitchen, next to the phone, waiting for her friend Mona to come on the line. She watched Sela and Pearl through the kitchen window. She blinked several times. Just for one second, she thought she was seeing Callie help Pearl into the car. “You’re spooking yourself, Brie,” she mumbled.

  “Hi, Brie, how’s things in South Carolina? Bet you’re all set to come back and think about getting a boyfriend so you can be married, too.”

  “In your dreams. Any important mail?”

  “Just the usual Occupant stuff and your Visa bill.”

  “Okay. Listen, I’m staying on an extra week.” She gave her friend a quick rundown on the situation. “So, if anything comes in the mail, call me here in the evening, okay?”

  “You bet. Hope your friend is okay.”

  “Me too. I’ll see you when I get back.”

  Brie made herself a fresh pot of coffee. She didn’t want to wake the Judge. She’d heard that the Judge liked to sleep till nine, putz around till ten, arrive in the office at ten-thirty, look over his mail and then head out for lunch. It was just eight-thirty now. Time to drink most of the coffee and review her sins of yesterday. She listened to the coffee perk. She could have sworn the sounds said, “Bode, Bode, Bode.”

  The telephone was so close, she could reach behind her and take the receiver off the hook. If she called, she’d have to tell him about Callie, and then she’d be breaking her promise.

  You’re losing it, Brie, she berated herself. You can’t call him. Her shoulders slumped. She wanted to cry and wasn’t sure why.

  It was a grim assembly of people sitting in the rest area in the hallway outside of the ICU unit. All eyes were on the specialists speaking with Wyn. Why are they saying the same thing over and over? Brie wondered. Do they think we’re stupid—that we don’t understand the meaning of the word hopeless? Wyn was shaking his head as was Pearl. She heard words that made her cringe. Blood gases . . . whatever they were . . . danger of pneumonia . . . weeks of antibiotics . . . brainstem activity . . . a pulmonary specialist was on call . . . chances are one in a million . . . CAT scan . . . Sometimes when the machines are disconnected the patient can breathe on his or her own. What usually happens is the patient is then dependent . . . what that means is the patient can’t take care of his or her own bodily functions. That will probably happen . . . We’re going to run a few more tests. For now, what we’re doing is this: we’ve ordered splints to be put on her hands, wrists, feet, and ankles to prevent contractures. We don’t want her joints to be stiff and contracted so they become useless. I want someone to bring in a pair of high-top sneakers so we can put them on her feet so they don’t drop. We need support for her feet. I know this doesn’t sound like much to you, but for now, it’s all that can be done . . .

  The trauma specialist had the grace to look embarrassed when he concluded, “This is a costly procedure where there is little visual evidence of . . .” He let the rest of what he was about to say trail into nothingness.

  Wyn said, “I don’t care. Callie has health insurance and the car insurance, however that works. If need be, I will pay any and all differences. I want everything that can be done to be done. Money is not important right now. I will not agree to having any of the life-support systems disconnected. The Judge, as her guardian, agrees.” He swiveled until he was facing the three women. “Pearl?”

  “No sir, no sir,” Pearl said.

  As Wyn walked toward the double doors leading back to the ICU unit, Sela whispered, “Guess he didn’t believe what you told him—you know, about Callie calling off the wedding. He’s going to help pay the bills.”

  “Saying it and doing it are two different things,” Brie said quietly. “You’re wrong though about him not believing me. He did.” />
  Sela shrugged. “What’s the weather like outside?”

  “Hot and muggy. I think we should leave for a little while and get a bite to eat. I could use some fast food and a lot of grease in my diet about now.”

  “My baby isn’t hopeless, is she, Miz Brie?” Pearl asked, choking on her sobs.

  “Maybe right now it looks that way. Doctors just . . . what they do is . . . they look at what’s happening right now, this minute, and they say what they see and think. That doesn’t mean things won’t or can’t change tomorrow, next week, or next month. Those men aren’t God, Pearl. They’re human beings doing their best. We have to be confident, hopeful, that things will improve. I think it’s a good sign that Wyn is conferring with you. I spoke to the Judge this morning at great length. I told him Callie had planned to call off the wedding. He didn’t seem at all surprised. He’s going to speak with Bill Duke at the bank about Callie’s account. The Judge was adamant about not pulling the plugs. I’m glad he’s Callie’s guardian and not Wyn.”

  “Why?”

  “Don’t pretend to be stupid, Sela. If he had a mind to, he could tell the hospital not to let Pearl in to see Callie. He can tell us to take a hike, meaning he could keep us away from her. That’s what a guardianship is all about.”

  “Oh.”

  “We don’t have to worry about that. Are you okay with this, Pearl?”

  “Yes’m,” Pearl said.

  “Sela?”

  “You have my vote.”

  “Then it’s settled. Tell me about the apartment.”

  “It’s not really an apartment. It’s rather like an efficiency. A large room, small kitchen area. The refrigerator and stove are small. The furniture is real nice, kind of modern. The main reason I took it was because it had a washer and a dryer and I know Pearl will be doing Callie’s laundry. You know, all her nightgowns and stuff. There’s a small market close by and it’s a quarter of a mile from the hospital. The rent is three hundred dollars. I snapped it up. We can pretty it up for her if you want. I thought we’d stock her up on groceries before we leave. What do you think, Brie?” Sela asked anxiously.

  “Everything sounds good. It’s the walking part that bothers me.”

  “I don’t know how to get around that,” Sela said. “When the weather is nice it won’t be so bad.”

  “It sounds jest fine, Miz Sela, and I need to be thanking you for all the trouble you’re going to.” 1

  “It was no trouble, Pearl, I was glad to do it. We want to make things as easy for you as we can. We’ll move you in before we leave so you don’t have to tote your things a little at a time.” Sela smiled.

  “The Judge said he’d drop by once a week and give Pearl money from the account. He’ll monitor it.”

  “What’s Wyn’s attitude?” Sela whispered. “You got here before I did. He seems kind of . . . pissy to me.”

  “He said hello, that was it. He just sits here like Pearl. They take turns going in to see Callie. He’s being a gentleman about it. He hasn’t said anything directly to me though.”

  “Under the circumstances it’s understandable,” Sela said. “Pearl, do you want to come with us for a bite to eat or would you like us to bring you something?”

  “I’m not much hungry, Miz Sela. You could be bringing me an apple if you have a mind to. It’s my turn to go in to see my baby soon.”

  Wyn was back in the waiting room, a cup of coffee in one hand, the morning paper in the other. In a dead-sounding voice, he asked Brie, “Were you telling me the truth last night? If you were, you just stripped me of my last reason for living. I’ve asked myself all night long, why you would say such a thing to me unless it was true. I apologize for my remarks last night. I was way out of line. If I could take back those hateful words, I would.”

  Out of the corner of her eye, Brie watched Pearl struggle to her feet. It was time to see the patient. She didn’t look at any of them as she opened the huge double doors, the string bag clutched firmly in her hand.

  “Callie confided in Pearl in the Judge’s garden. She said she was going to tell you when you went to drop off the keys « at your client’s house. I wouldn’t have said anything to you, knowing how badly you’re hurting right now, if you hadn’t made those awful remarks about Bode and Pearl. Your apology 1 . . . what good is it, Wyn, if you think of them in those terms? Sorry is just a word. If you’re looking for absolution, you’re going to have to get it somewhere else.”

  “Knowing what you know now, is that going to make a difference in helping Callie?” Sela asked.

  “No, of course not. I love Callie. Until she tells me herself that she doesn’t love me, nothing will change. You need to know I’m here for the long haul. Callie will get better, I’m sure of it. She has to get better, she just has to.”

  “After we leave, you’ll be kind to Pearl, won’t you?”

  “You really think of me as some kind of monster, don’t you?”

  “Of course not,” Sela said.

  “Yes, some kind of monster,” Brie said.

  “That was a pretty shitful thing you did to me last night, handcuffing me to that old man’s car. I could have reported you to the police, but I didn’t—you know why? Because you’re under as much stress as I am. I could have had you locked up for that little stunt, but I’m willing to forgive and forget.”

  “You’re more generous than I would be under the circumstances, and that makes me wonder all the more about you. I wanted to like you because Callie said she loved you. In a way I did like you. I thought in some ways you were good for her, but she saw something . . . or felt something . . . and she changed her mind. Right now, I’m willing to put aside any and all differences and concentrate on what’s best for Callie.”

  “My sentiments exactly,” Wyn said.

  “Has there been any change?”

  “A bit and it’s not for the best. Callie was coming down with her annual summer cold. She’s congested, and the doctors are concerned she might get pneumonia. That’s not good. I spoke to the chief of staff and asked him if he could shorten the wait between visits from one hour to the half hour. He agreed. I can go in for five minutes on the half hour and Pearl can go in on the hour. They’re bending the rules a little for Pearl. The last time she went in they let her stay for ten minutes. That’s why she won’t leave with you.”

  “We’ll bring her something to eat,” Brie said.

  Neither woman spoke until they were outside. “He’s going to be nice to Pearl because he knows if he isn’t, Bode will—Well, I don’t know what Bode will do, but he’ll do something.”

  “I’m getting a tad tired of hearing about what Bode will or won’t do. Don’t tell me you still have a crush on him,” Sela said snidely.

  “Are we forgetting the mad crush you had on him at one time?”

  “I outgrew that a long time ago.”

  “He’s a good friend, nothing more.”

  “If you say so,” Sela said slyly.

  Brie ignored Sela’s comment.

  “What do we do now?” Sela asked. “I mean after we eat?”

  “We wait.”

  12

  The day before Brie was to leave for San Diego, the resident doctor on staff drew her aside, and said quietly, “Miss Parker has pneumonia, but I guess you know that. The antibiotics we’ve been giving her don’t seem to be working. We’re going to start a new dose today. The treatment will take six weeks.” Brie stared at him. He seemed to be waiting for her to say something.

  Brie struggled with her tongue. “Let me be sure I understand what you’re saying here. This pneumonia, the emphysema, the cardiac arrest of the other day and maybe some other complications . . . those are rather small things to consider if what all the specialists said earlier is true and Callie isn’t going to come out of this. Now you’re saying you’re going to switch the antibiotics and even if it cures the pneumonia, doesn’t that put it all back to square one?”

  The doctor nodded.

  “Did
you speak to Mr. Archer or Pearl?” she asked.

  “Yesterday. They’re very discouraged.”

  “Well, guess what, Doctor, I’m discouraged, too. If my opinion counts, this seems like an exercise in futility, but I say go ahead. Will Callie breathe easier?”

  “Yes. It will be a medical resolution of sorts.”

  “Well, whoopee! I’m sorry, Doctor, I’m just tired. You see, I have to leave tomorrow and San Diego isn’t around the corner. I can’t get back here whenever I feel like it. I was hoping I could leave knowing something more positive.”

  “It doesn’t look good, Miss Canfield.”

  “I know that. I remember reading about a young girl up North who was in a coma for ten or more years. Her name was Karen something—Quintan, that’s it. She lived in a coma after they removed the respirator. She never regained consciousness. That could happen to Callie, couldn’t it?”

  “Yes, but it’s unlikely. Patients can breathe on their own sometimes when the respirator is removed. If your question is do they die right away when the plug is removed, the answer is no.”

  “I wasn’t going to ask you any such thing, Doctor,” Brie said huffily. “You see, I’m one of the people who believe that Callie will come out of this.” The only one, she thought.

  “Would you like to have dinner with me?” the young man said suddenly. “It will have to be in the cafeteria though.”

  Brie was stunned. She shook her head. “I’m engaged, sorry.”

  “Okay,” the doctor said agreeably. “Anyone I know?” he called over his shoulder.

  “Bode Jessup,” Brie lied.

  “So, old Bode finally went and did it. Say Stone Meyers said hello. You got the best, Miss Canfield.”

  “Yeah, I know,” Brie murmured. Now, where did that come from?

  She was back in the waiting room outside ICU. She knew every thread in the upholstery, every spot on the carpet. Her eyes were bloodshot from staring at the grainy television set. Wyn looked as if a devil was on his back, Pearl even worse. She knew she herself looked like something the cat had dragged in and refused to take back out. They weren’t eating, and they were drinking too much black coffee and smoking too many cigarettes. She had to do something.