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The Seventh Voyage of Temperance (The Adventures of Ichabod Temperance Book 7)

Page 14

by Ichabod Temperance


  “Kitkara . . .”

  “Oh, Kitkara . . .”

  “Kitkara . . .”

  Chapter Nineteen:

  Icky vs. the Ineluctible Advance of Kitkara

  “If you please, Ichsa-bod, it appears that the mighty ZodGila is not to return. I am so sorry.”

  ~sniff~ “But, Miss Rhianico, Ma’am, ~sniff~ what are we gonna do without him?”

  “Tut, tut, Mr. Temperance, you are not to worry, sir, for we shall persevere and overcome. Now then, the first order of business is to get word to ToeKey-Oh that another threat swiftly approaches. The city must resume the evacuation process. With any luck, the city never stalled in their initial exit, and it will be a depopulated city that awaits the horrific Kitkara, eh hem?”

  “Hai, I hope you are right, Persephone. The fastest way to return to ToeKey-Oh is by these air service wings. Ichsa-bod has made the necessary repairs to his set, so all we need...”

  “If you please, Jubei, I do not want to part from you again!”

  “Nor do I wish to be separated from you, Mr. Temperance.”

  “But Miss Rhianico, and Miss Plumtartt, Ma’ams, we only got the ’lectric-scooter and the two pair of wings. There ain’t no other way to get us all back to the city.”

  “Oh, but if you please, Ichsa-bod, I am confident that I can operate a set of air service wings, myself.”

  “Hai, Rhianico, I have given you a limited amount of instruction, but you have never actually flown! It is too dangerous!”

  “If you please, Jubei, this is just as much my fight as any one else’s. Maybe more so, for it was my brother, Doctor Autwell Lionelstein, whose actions have brought ruin down upon the Earth, and shame to my family name.”

  “Are you sure, Miss Rhianico, Ma’am?”

  “If you please, hai, Ichsa-bod.”

  “I say, I hate to be a damper upon your heroics, but I feel impelled to point out that we are without a high cliff or structure to launch from, eh hem?”

  “Hai, Persephone is right, Ichsa-bod, what shall we do?”

  “Hmm, oh, I know! We’ll fly a kite!”

  ---

  “Are you ready, Jubei? Do those slidy shoes feel like they’re gonna skid properly?”

  “Hai!”

  “Hi! How about you, Miss Rhianico, Ma’am? You still wanna go through with this?”

  “If you please, Ichsa-bod, how do you say, ‘let’s get her accomplished’?”

  “Hi! Yes, Ma’am! All right then, get ready! On my mark. . . Here! . . We! . . Go-o-o-o-o-o ! ! ! ! ”

  ~WHZZZ-Z-Z-ZOOOOOOM!!!~

  “How are we doin,’ Miss Plumtartt?”

  “So far so good, one might observe, Mr. Temperance! Our two tethered friends are still upright, having survived the initiation of our launch sequence, eh hem?”

  “Good! How ’bout them slider baskets? Are they holding up?”

  “They are performing splendidly, I am thrilled to report. As this high-powered speed cycle hurtles along the soft terrain of this sandy turfed and sea-grass graced Nipponese beach, our companions in tow are sliding atop the grassy grounds, their feet both encased in the reed woven baskets secured to our aeronauts’ feet.”

  “We should have ’em close to being airborne by now, Miss Plumtartt. I hope so because we are quickly running out of drivable terrain, Ma’am.”

  “They are aloft, Mr. Temperance! I am releasing the tow-rope!”

  “Hang on, Miss Plumtartt!”

  “Do not worry for my comforts, Mr. Temperance; rather, please concentrate on your duties as dynorator-cycle chauffeur, sir.”

  “Yes, Ma’am, Miss Plumtart Ma’am. I don’t feel good about endangering you, Ma’am, but our needs require that my piloting might at times border on the reckless. Please let me know if you need me to slow down.”

  “I say, I do so very much appreciate your concern for my comfort and safety, Mr. Temperance. Under normal circumstances, I might be inclined to reprimand you for such egregious flagrance of local traffic ordinances; however, things being what they are, I am inclined to grant you complete autonomy in your driving habits.”

  “Thanks, Miss Plumtartt, Ma’am. Um, may I ask you a question?”

  “Of course, sir, how may I be of service?”

  “Well, uh, it’s just that you and I are alone together...”

  “I suppose that hurtling along together at speeds upwards of eighty miles per hour, dodging carts, wagons and assorted military vehicles, on a super-powered, electric-motored cycle does preclude the accompaniment of properly chaperoned companionship. However, the circumstances of having a colossal super-monster from the hostile origin of Planet Eckes should nullify any breach in accepted etiquette, my bashful paramour.”

  “That’s good, Miss Plumtartt. Um, may I make another observation?”

  “Oh, please do, sir.”

  “Well, Ma’am, the way I am laying out across the top of this high speed scooter, with my head low and my feet up high, and then you’re back there, spooned in nice and tight, conforming to my shape and squeezing ahold of me with both arms locked in a crushing waist lock, hugging me like your life depends on it is a really pleasant sensation, Ma’am.”

  “Eh hem, well, now that you mention it, the requirement of having to shout to make ourselves heard above the rush of the wind and my clinging to you with both arms as if my life depended on it because it does, aside, the proximity we share is, I readily concede, a pleasing thing to me as well, my tautly built beau. I confess, the press of your wiry frame brings me a measure of reassurance.”

  “You too, Miss Plumtartt.”

  ---

  “Well, here we are, Miss Plumtartt. This here is Toshi’s broadcasting station. From here, we are afforded an unobstructed view of the expansive valley basin that contains the harbour and sprawling city of ToeKey-Oh. You can see the damage that ZodGila wrought when he was here.”

  “Need I remind you, Mr. Temperance, that we are not here as tourists. Rather, our interest lies in whether the city’s inhabitants have safely evacuated. I am relieved to see that ToeKey-Oh gives every appearance of being completely deserted. This is most fortuitous, for if I am not mistaken, I see and hear the approach of our strange visitor from Planet Eckes, the ‘Ineluctible One’, Kitkara.”

  “Yes, Ma’am. He moves with stealth, braced for attack. I am thinking that he now realizes that there is no defense being offered here. His bearing has completely changed. He is now strutting around like he owns the place! Did you see that? He just nonchalantly knocked that great crane over with a casual flick of his weighted tail! Look at him now! He is ripping up the docks in a manner that makes me think he is just sharpening his claws. Uh, oh, he is getting really agitated now! I’m not sure, but maybe he is just acting like he is excited. He is all scrunched up and coiled to spring. His tail is flicking around uncontrollably! His ears are pinned back and he has a wild, untamed look in his eyes!”

  “By the Emperor’s New Clothes! He leaps! Spreading his great, golden wings, he soars across the bay and now falls upon ToeKey-Oh proper! Clutching and biting, he pulls several city blocks into his grasp and with his rear feet, viciously rakes the buildings into kindling.”

  “Whoa! There he goes again! He has leapt to another section of the city and is repeating the maneuver. Now he has jumped up. He is crouched low in front, and has his rear end sticking up behind. He is clawing and raking that whole neighborhood to smithereens, Miss Plumtartt!”

  “Quite so, Mr. Temperance, yes he is. What the devil is this three-headed, feline dragon from the depths of the aether’s void doing now? Why, that pompous super-monster is happily marching this capital city into the rubbish bin! The great architecture of this dynamic city is crushed asunder. Oh, what a loathsome sight. Worse still, is the smug look on Kitkara’s faces.”

  “Yes, Ma’am, Miss Plumtartt, Ma’am, he sure ’nough is proud of his’self. Don’t look now, but I think that rascal is fixin’ to toot his own horn again.”

  “REEER-REERL
L!”

  “REEER-RAWRLL!”

  “REEER-RORLL!”

  “Ha, ha, ha!”

  “REEER-REERLL!”

  “Thus begins the end of the upstart Earthlings!”

  “REEER-RAWRLL!”

  “None shall challenge the invincible might of Planet Eckes!”

  “REEER-RORLL!”

  “Let us sing a quick song of victory before we continue with our wholesale destruction of this second rate planet!”

  “Kitkara . . .”

  “Kitkara . . .”

  “Mighty talons claw”

  “Hind legs will rake.”

  “This city’s dust is flour,”

  “For the poison cookies I Bake.”

  “Where has humanity run?”

  “The insignificant specks.”

  “I shall devour them all!”

  “To the glory of Planet Eckes!”

  “Kitkara . . .”

  “Invincible!”

  “Kitkara . . .”

  “Ineluctible!”

  “Kitkara . . .”

  “The mightiest creature in the Universe!”

  “Kitka... urgh.”

  “Kit... urgh.”

  “Super-Controller!”

  “Super-Controller!”

  “Kitkara is the greatest weapon of the greatest person in the universe, Super-Controller.”

  “Kitkara . . .”

  “Kitkara . . .”

  “I say, Mr. Temperance, was it just I or did you too notice a peculiar, if momentary, twitch, with the great Kitkara’s behaviours, eh hem?”

  “Yes, Ma’am, Miss Plumtartt Ma’am, all three snaky necks went to twisting, letting their cat heads loll about insensibly. Their kitty eyes, stretched wide and unblinking, went to rolling madly about, as the three heads were fighting an unseen inner battle for control of their voices.”

  “However the struggle of id is now passed and the kitten has come home to roost. Once again, ToeKey-Oh is this fanciful feline’s litter pan.”

  “Yes, Ma’am, and now, with one last complete spin, raking out chunks of the city to scatter over several miles, Kitkara, the three-headed, dragon-skinned, hammer-tailed, gryphon-winged, lion-bodied, hydra-necked, kitty-cat has sashayed out of sight, seeking other sections of this victimized city to further spread the malignant malevolence of Planet Eckes.”

  Chapter Twenty:

  Icky vs. the Temptation of Complete Despair

  “The ‘Ineluctible One,’ is right, for there ain’t nothing that can resist this fearsome foe! Kitkara is running amok. Miss Plumtartt, what are we gonna do?”

  “Why Mr. Temperance, you and I shall do what we always do. That is, everything in our power to lend assistance in any manner at our disposal when calamity tumbles to our feet, as so often happens, eh hem? I am tasking you with remedying this unfortunate circumstance, Mr. Temperance.”

  ~gulp~ “Yes, Ma’am, Miss Plumtartt, Ma’am, well then I reckon we better stay after Kitkara. Keep ahold of me Miss Plumtartt, I am going to resume our dyno-bike journey. As long as Kitkara is on the ground, he is easy to keep track of, but I’m afraid he’ll take flight and get away from us.”

  “The speeds attainable of this incredible cycle are quite extraordinary, Mr. Temperance, as are your skills at handling the two-wheeled craft. I enjoy every confidence in your ability to pursue the beast. Any sign of Jubei and Rhianico, eh hem?”

  “At one point, I thought I got a glimpse of something fluttering around Kitkara’s position, but I couldn’t swear if it was them or not.”

  “I had the same impression. I think it safe to assume that Jubei and Rhianico are maintaining a constant, airbourne vigil on our uninvited guest.”

  “Oh Miss Plumtartt, it breaks my heart to see ToeKey-Oh being torn to ruins like this. I feel terrible about letting this happen.”

  “Take solace in knowing we helped to alert the city to her peril and helped to save many lives, sir.”

  “Yes, Ma’am.”

  “Oh, look over there, Mr. Temperance, I momentarily detected movement behind that large pile of rubble.”

  “Somebody might be in trouble, Miss Plumtartt! I’m going to stop to see if we need to lend some assistance real quick-like.”

  “I agree Mr. Temperance. There, now I shall just make a brief inquiry as you bring our electric bicycle built for two to a stop. Now then I’ll just call out, Yoo, hoo! Hello-Oh-o-o? Is anybody there?”

  “No.” . . . “Oops!”

  “Oh well, I guess you were mistaken, Miss Plumtartt; they said no-one was home. Hey, wait a minute, how could somebody answer that there was nobody there, if there is nobody there to answer? I think somebody is storying us, Ma’am!”

  “Quite so, Mr. Temperance, in fact, I would go so far to say that you and I are familiar with the sweet tones of this bearish voice, eh hem?”

  “What are you saying, Miss Plumtartt?”

  “I am saying that our shy tenant is none other than the mighty Gumibara!”

  “Huh!”

  “Er, uh, yes, it is I, the mighty Gumibara. Is that new super-monster gone? Is it safe to come out?”

  “I don’t think Kitkara is concerned with this, the section of ToeKey-Oh that he has already destroyed, Gumibara.”

  “Kitkara, huh. That was a really scary super-monster, you guys! Where did he come from?”

  “Eh hem, it is our understanding that the great Kitkara’s origins lie on the distant and secretive, Planet Eckes.”

  “What does he want?”

  “He wants to destroy Planet Earth, sir. He is on a mission to destroy everything and everybody.”

  “What happened to the invincible ZodGila?”

  “He done did got vincibled.”

  “How is that even possible? What are we going to do?”

  “I say, it rather behooves us to devise a stratagem of defeating this unparalleled threat to our World, yes?”

  “Yes, Ma’am. Oops! I mean, right, Persephone.”

  Then you’ll help us, Mr. Gumibara, sir?”

  “Yes, Icky, the mighty Gumibara is here to save the day! RRRRAW... I mean, RRRRAWR! Eh hem, don’t want to lose the element of surprise, and let Kitkara know that we are on his trail, right?”

  “Yessir, good idea.”

  “Hey, what is that quiver I feel inside my gelatin molded form? I sense the approach of a super-monster!”

  “I don’t see any super-monsters, Gumibara, sir.”

  “There, in the harbour!”

  “I say, Gumibara is correct Mr. Temperance. Look to where I point, and you may see a familiar green snout, cautiously breaking the surface of the water.”

  “Eek! Is it a gigantic, horrible sea-monster, come to finish up where Kitkara left off?”

  “No, Icky, it is the terrific, TiTaupkamaro!”

  “Is it safe to come out of the water, yet?”

  “Sure thing, TiTaupkamaro, you’ll be safe with us, buddy.”

  “Is ZodGila gone?”

  “Eh hem, I have the unfortunate duty to report that the incomparable ZodGila has been defeated by an even greater threat than he. We now must contend with a flying, thrice- headed feline dragon from the dark void of the Heaven’s aether.”

  “What? That is impossible! Nothing could defeat ZodGila! Did you see what he did to me?”

  “Yessir, we saw how the massive ZodGiler took ahold of you and cast you far to sea, but this new monster, Kitkara, did even worse by ZodGiler. It looked like Kitkara did ZodGiler in for good.”

  “How can we hope to defy a super-monster that toppled even the great ZodGila?”

  “That’s a good question, Mr. Gumibara. Well, Miss Plumtartt, do you have an inkling as to how we can accomplish this task?”

  “Why, Mr. Temperance, you know that I have the utmost confidence of your being able to think of something, sir. Yes, rather, eh hem.”

  “Yes, Ma’am. Say, look, up in the sky!”

  “It’s a bird!”

  “Perhaps a crane!


  “No, it’s Jubei and Rhianico, returning to us via their Nipponese Air Service, spring-powered, clockwork-driven, leather wings!”

  “Hai, Ichsa-bod.”

  “Hi, Jubei! We sure are glad to see y’all back safe and sound.”

  “If you please, let us skip the pleasantries and get straight to business. Kitkara will soon be ready to move. We must act immediately!”

  “Quite so, my dear Rhianico, pray tell, were you and Jubei able to garner any useful intelligence while in flight, eh hem?”

  “If you please, Persephone, I do not think we could see anything from above that you could not see from here.”

  “Ha! I know that stupid super-monster Kitkara is not as perfect as he thinks he is! I definitely heard him trip over a couple of his lines while he was singing.”

  “I ain’t the best singer in the world neither, so I wasn’t going to say anything, but I noticed it too.”

  “No Mr. Temperance, this distortion of Kitkara’s song was most peculiar. There was more to Kitkara’s difficulties during his performance than the common ‘choking’ on stage malady.”

  “Hai, Persephone, I noticed something while we were aloft during that episode. It did not seem to have a relevance, and is probably not very important, but I thought I’d mention it. At the time of Kitkara’s stutter, I saw a tiny flashing light. It came from a chest, affixed to the rear of the central neck stalk’s collar.”

  “I say, I did wonder about that slender red collar, one of the hydra necks wears. What is this about a chest, eh hem?”

  “As I said, it is on the back of the neck, which puts it out of sight from you on the ground, but Rhianico and I could see it plainly from above.”

  “If you please, a strangely smooth chest is affixed to the back of the red necklace, rather than the front. There was a brief flash of artificial, red light from the silver crate. I think this light may have been an electricity-driven contraption of some diabolical design.”

  “Hunh, well, I reckon we’ll just have to store that little bit of info aside until we can make sense of it.”

  “I say, it looks as if our intrepid band of mission mates is still intact, eh? Splendid! I call now for us to re-affirm our vow to dispatch our enemy and avenge our losses! What say you?”

 

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