Gunned Down

by Dale Chase

I’m lost on what to say because something has changed and I want to consider it before I agree. He must get this as he doesn’t press.

  “We’d best get on,” I manage. “Get back to the boys, tell them the bank is good pickings.”

  He’s fine with this, and once we’re on our way, he’s his eager self while I’m lost to thoughts I can’t corral. The fact that he took me strikes over and over, but where I once thought I’d kill the man who did such a thing, I find I have no anger. What I do have I can’t figure, only that the whole of me, head to toes and back again, cares for this boy who is more man than any I’ve ever known.

  * * * *

  Best trick of any outlaw gang is spare horses stashed partway along the planned escape route. When a posse gets thrown together, they lack the planning we do, and we outrun them every time because we change mounts while they wear out theirs. So on the Kettner job, we leave Virgil and Dewey with eight of Noble’s stock just outside Mercy while the rest of us go onto get us some money.

  Leland and Harry stay out front with the horses to keep watch while Wade, Evan, and me go inside quiet like, just cowboys looking to do business. When it’s down to just two customers and the one clerk, we pull down our masks and Wade calls out “throw up your hands.” The deed is then done. Evan and Wade keep order while I throw cash into sacks, and there’s a good lot of it. With two sacks full, I go out front, look around to see if it’s clear, then make ready to leave.

  Dewey and Virgil are mounted. I swing a sack to each, then Wade, Evan, and me climb into the saddle and we’re off at a gallop just as somebody yells “holdup.” Some fool takes a couple shots, which fall short, and we’re well on our way.

  It takes time to gather a posse and we use this well, riding hell-bent, which, astride a beast in full gallop, is nearly as exciting as the robbery itself. A man’s horse is powerful worked up in such pursuit, as is the fellow on his back, and while I mostly look ahead, I do steal a sidelong glance now and again to see Evan keeping pace at my side, mask now to reveal that face I covet.

  We change horses as planned. Virgil and Dewey take the others back to Noble, while we turn east to avoid the posse, which may or may not be on our heels. Evan has already told of a canyon hidden in the foothills, and we ride there, going through a narrow passage that shields the place from view. A trickle of water bubbles down the rocks to form a pond, and the horses and ourselves drink while Harry climbs up to stand guard.

  “We’ll stay the night,” Wade announces, dropping money bags to the ground. We spread our bedrolls ad eat hardtack. There’ll be no fire come night as smoke would give away our presence.

  Wade counts the money while we look on. He always does this, and I kid him he should have been a banker. He doesn’t laugh like usual. Things haven’t been the same since Evan and me took our scouting trip, like he knows we got up to mischief. I don’t comment on this. We have yet to fuck.

  “Twenty-six thousand two hundred eight,” Wade says. “We’ll split twenty-four among us, three thousand each, the rest to Noble.” He counts it into nine piles with all in agreement.

  We stash money in saddlebags, some to pocket. Rest of the day we spend snoozing or planning how to spend the money. Always a good time with new money. Dusk falls over us and Harry comes down to say nobody is in sight.

  “Wore out their horses,” Leland declares and we have a good laugh, though Wade insists a man remain on guard. Being Leland is feeling frisky, he gets the task and doesn’t object.

  Evan stays mostly quiet. A look passes between us now and again, and when it’s dark, I can hear a hand working a prick, then low grunts as he comes. I’m hard as a post, aching to get at him, but I hold back. Usually I just climb onto Wade there in the dark because nobody cares who does what, but I leave off and pass a restless night.

  * * * *

  Next morning, we ride to Noble’s place, where Hannah gives us breakfast and we tell of the holdup. Wade gives Noble his cut. “Kettner bank was asking for it,” Wade tells our host. “If they got together a posse, we never saw it.”

  “They all should be this easy,” I offer, recalling how a man got killed last time out, Gene Clemmer shot off his horse as we escaped Bridgeville with only nine thousand. Hardly worth it.

  Later on, I head to the river for a bath because Evan is down there. Wade’s talking with Noble about the next job, so I think maybe I can do the kid.

  From the shore, I see nobody right off. Maybe I was mistaken on Evan’s intentions. Still in want of a bath, I strip and wash, in the course of which I note movement downstream on the opposite shore among the trees. I move down to get a look and find Evan standing stark naked, bent over for Jack, who is fucking like a madman. I rise out of the water to watch, and Jack turns my way, passes me an awful grin as he pops his prick out of the kid, turns toward me and wags it before driving back into Evan. The kid doesn’t look my way so there’s no telling if he knows I’m there. Jack starts to hurry and I know he’s ready to come, so I go back upstream, get dressed, hurry away, hating that any of this bothers me.

  Wade is in the cabin and I tell him, “Come to the barn,” which he knows what for. He passes me a look I well know, showing he’s eager, and we head to Noble’s barn, where we often use a back stall. A come-stained blanket lies in the straw and I push Wade onto it, pull down his pants and drawers. I’m hard as iron and unloose my dick, but when I try to mount Wade, he bucks me off, rolls over, and slams a fist to my gut.

  “What in hell?” I say before he lands another, at which I gain myself and sock him in the jaw, causing him to fall back. I fall on top of him, get his arm into a lock, which allows me to roll him over and pin him. I shove my dick up his ass and fuck him hard and fast, and it’s a good one, maybe because I’m worked up with the fighting, and I come quick, after which we lie quiet, me still atop him.

  Breathing heavy, we pass a minute before I pull out and sit back. He rolls over and I see where he’s let go into the blanket, but he doesn’t look satisfied. He appears angry, like he’d punch me, had he not just spent himself. I button up and leave him there, then ride into Greenlee, where I get into a card game that goes most of the night.

  A good bit of my money stays in Greenlee, but I don’t care. I just want to be away from Wade and Evan both. A man across the poker table gives me the eye, and when he cashes out of the game around four a.m., I do the same, then follow him around back, where he drops his pants and I take him braced against a wall.

  I roar with the come, and soon as I’m done I want to do it again, like there’s not going to be any relief ever, so I get down and suck his dick, swallowing his stuff when he comes.

  After this, I find my horse and head toward Noble’s place. The sun comes up as I ride and I think on things, such as how Jack likely persuaded the kid to submit, how Jack’s never been good for the outfit, him and his no-good schemes. When I reach the ranch, I see him coming out of the privy, wearing just drawers, and I want to beat hell out of him. Instead, I unsaddle my horse, get him some oats, and wash up at the river. Only then do I venture into the cabin.

  Wade sports a bruise on his jaw where I’d hit him, but he acts regular, like nothing happened. Nobody asks where I’ve been because a man has a right to go off by himself. Everyone is moving around, dressing, because Hannah is strict about breakfast time. That woman could run an outfit like nobody else, if she chose.

  When the others head up to the house, Evan stays back, fussing over a boot, which is almost funny. I give him a second, then sit beside him on his bed.

  “I saw you with Jack yesterday, down at the river.”

  He inspects his boot, runs his thumb along the sole, but says nothing.

  “I thought we had something going,” I add, “so I’m surprised at what I saw.”

  “Jack helped me out. I owe him.”

  “You don’t owe any man, not even me. There’s no debt here. You shouldn’t give way unless you want.”

  He goes silent again.

  “Do you want?
”

  “I always want,” he says.

  This is a slap in the face, sure as if he’d laid a hand to me. My head snaps to the side and I get up because I want to slap this kid, this boy, who’s letting his dick run him. I go out, force myself to take breakfast with the men because I refuse to be seen as played.

  Evan is big enough to allow some minutes before he follows and he sits away from me at the table. As talk goes around, I offer how I’d gambled and caroused all night in Greenlee.

  “Any money left?” asks Virgil.

  “Enough,” I return with a laugh.

  As others tell of similar experiences, most of which we’d witnessed, there’s laughter, which I welcome, because it allows me to keep an eye on Evan and Jack. What I find by meal’s end is that I’m alone in my concern. Evan chows down, looking innocent, while Jack appears a bit too sure of himself. I scarcely taste my food.

  Noble announces that he’s got fresh stock coming in today and will need us to help out. All agree to this and I welcome the diversion. Horses can comfort a man, being mostly good-natured, and the day passes in culling and rebranding.

  When we finally knock off around five, we head to the river to wash away dirt and horse grime. Evan is into the water by the time I get there and he watches me strip. He’s lying in the river, playing around, splashing, washing, dick stiff the whole time. Others bathe and get out, then head to the cabin. I note Jack absent, but the sight of Evan sets aside any concern.

  Nobody’s around and Evan looks like a morsel laid out for me. I slide into the water and take his cock into my mouth, at which he spurts into my throat. Fueled by this, I climb over him and shove my dick into his mouth. “Suck me off.”

  As he sets to work, somebody says, “That’s enough.”

  I turn to see Jack on the shore, fully dressed and pistol pointed at me.

  “Pull out,” he adds, “or I’ll kill you.”

  I do as told and Evan sits up. I tell him to stay put. “You plan to shoot me, Jack? You’ll have to answer for that.” As I speak, I take a step toward him because I don’t believe he’s got backbone enough to do what he wants to do. My being more sure than him gives me the advantage, and I take another step his way.

  “Stay put,” he orders, but I don’t.

  One more step and I tell him, “Best shoot me if you’re going to.”

  He backs away, but keeps the gun on me.

  I walk onto the shore and pick up my pants. In one quick move, I swing them around hard as I can, knocking away Jack’s gun. Then I’m on him, fists flying at his gut, jaw, you name it.

  Everything I hate about him comes loose, and soon he’s on the ground, begging me to stop. Unfortunately for him, this angers me further, such a weakling, so I grab him at the neck and drag him into the river, where I hold him under until he’s drowned.

  The river is clear and Jack looks up at me, dead man with eyes wide, mouth open. My hands stay on him until he’s quiet for some minutes. Only then do I stand.

  I’m breathing like a horse run to lather and pass a few seconds in near swoon before I gain myself and look at Evan. He still sits in the water, though now his mouth is open.

  “You’re witness,” I say. “He drew on me, an unarmed man.”

  Evan nods and gets up.

  As we dress, something occurs to me. “Never killed a man while naked.”

  Evan snorts a laugh. That’s it for the funny part. Once dressed, he asks, “What now?”

  “No idea.”

  “Did you kill him because of me?”

  “He drew on me and I defended myself.”

  “Okay.”

  Just because it was a fair fight doesn’t spare me stepping up. He’ll have to get buried, and Noble will need to okay that, so I have to tell everyone what happened. I drag Jack from the water, lay him on the shore. I close his eyes, then tell Evan we’ll leave him for now.

  “You come with me. Noble first.”

  I’ve never had to explain killing a man, but I had never made it personal before, had never lay hands on the man either. Bullets are quick, distant, and with a robbery, there’s no looking back. I’ve shot at many a man, seen some fall, but never knew if any had died.

  “Hello, boys,” Hannah says at the door. “Noble’s in the back.”

  We go through the parlor where children play, then head for a room Noble uses as an office. It’s a mess, but he seems to like that. He’s at his desk when we come in.

  “Noble, something happened I need to tell you about,” I announce.

  He sits back in his chair. “Boys?”

  “Jack drew on me down by the river and I killed him. Evan saw it.”

  “Christ, Roy, what’s going on?”

  “No idea. Jack can go haywire sometimes. You know that.”

  “Evan?” asks Noble.

  “It’s true. I was in the water. Jack came along and pointed his pistol at Roy, said he meant to kill him.”

  “Why?”

  “He didn’t say, just made his intention clear.”

  “Well, this is a hell of a fix.”

  “I’m sorry, Noble,” I tell him. “I don’t mean to put you on the spot, but on the other hand, Jack isn’t known to be here and there’s nobody who’ll look for him. He’s got no family. I figure we can bury him out near the edge of your property and nobody will know.”

  Noble leans forward, puts elbows on the desk, and rubs his chin. “Guess this is my due for having you here. Okay, you take care of it. Plant him out near the foothills and make it deep. I don’t want some critter coming around with an arm in its mouth.”

  “Will do. Thanks, Noble. And again, I’m sorry. I’ll go tell the men about it now.”

  “Best do that.”

  When we hit the front porch, everything stops, like the air has dried up. I draw a breath and get nothing, try again, and still no air. I grab a post.

  “Roy, you okay?”

  I wave him off, bending over because my head is swimming. I choke and cough, which frees up whatever has me in its grip, and I suck in air until I’m righted. And as I stand, I feel my hands on Jack’s throat, feel myself pressing down, feel the water. It’s so real, I shake my hands to get the wet off.

  “Roy?” Evan says.

  “I’m okay,” I assure him. “It just hit me what I did.”

  He puts a hand on my shoulder, then slides it onto my back and starts to rub. “Hell of a thing, It would shake any man.”

  After drawing long breaths, I finally have enough air so I get to the next part. I see the men coming toward the house for supper and I meet them partway. “Fellows, hold up a minute. I need to speak on something. Just now, down at the river, Jack drew on me and I had to defend myself and I killed him.”

  Looks pass among the men, then Wade speaks. “Didn’t hear no shot.”

  “I had no gun, being naked in the river. When he drew on me, said he’d kill me, I managed to get the upper hand and drowned him. Evan saw it all.”

  They look to Evan. “It’s true. Roy had no choice.”

  “I told Noble,” I continue, “and he says to bury Jack near the foothills, so I’ll do that. I’m not sorry for what I did. A man draws down, he best be ready for a fight.”

  Wade’s eyes are fixed on me and I can almost hear the wheels turn up top, because he then looks to Evan, then me, then back to Evan. And he says nothing, just goes to the house. The others follow and Harry slaps me on the back as he passes.

  “Get me a shovel from the barn,” I tell Evan. “I’ll saddle my horse.”

  “Saddle two. I’ll help.”

  “No need, Evan. I did it, I should pay.”

  “Quit blaming yourself. Jack was in the wrong, and besides, it’ll take you all night to dig the hole, so I’m helping.”

  “Okay. Thanks.”

  We throw Jack over a horse and walk him up to where Noble says to bury him. Night is coming on when we start digging, but I note a full moon rising and am grateful for this small thing. Evan and me
work in silence, digging deep like Noble wants. The moon is high and we’re a sweaty mess when we drop Jack in. I know something should be said over him, but my only thought is “good riddance,” so I keep quiet.

  “Bye, Jack,” Evan says. “Thanks for helping me.”

  I don’t mind throwing dirt on Jack. The spell that overtook me on Noble’s porch has gone, chased off by hard work.

  Back in the saddle, I tell Evan I want to wash up, but not where we usually go. We ride to where the river comes onto the property, and once there, take off shirts and clean up. Most times, doing this around Evan would lead to something, but not now. I find myself seized by darkness, dreading the light of day. Once washed, we dress and head to the barn, bed down the horses, then hit the cabin, where all are asleep. We join them and I welcome dozing off.

  * * * *

  Next day, it’s like Jack never was. The men rise to growl and grumble like always, nobody taking much note on Jack’s bed being empty. He could be off drunk somewhere or down to the river, for all they care. I turn to Evan, who I find watching me. I can’t make out how he feels about events and hope he’s not waiting on me to tell him what for, because at this point, I have no idea. I dress like the others, enjoy a trip to the privy, then walk to breakfast. I decide it’s a fine day, likely to warm considerably.

  Breakfast passes as usual and I eat a lot, having missed supper night before. As I shovel in food, it occurs to me I’m eating regular, when yesterday I killed a man with the same hands now working knife and fork. I pause to let this play over me, allowing it my due, then finish the meal.

  As there’s no horse work to do and Noble asks no other chores of us, we go our separate ways after breakfast. Some head for the river, where there are good spots under the trees to sleep off the meal. Others return to the cabin, though a couple remain on the porch. I go in, as do Wade and Evan. I stretch out on my bed, while Evan sits on his bunk to clean his gun. Wade pulls Jack’s things from under his bed and starts going through them. There’s a worn satchel and a box, plus saddlebags hanging on a peg above the bed. Wade pulls out clothes, an old pistol, and Jack’s money, which he counts.