“It's gonna be a big deal, but it will be worth it,” Lilly said as she walked up and listened for a second or two. “You guys want more? Janna sent me, and she sent these.” She held some biscuits with what looked like blueberries baked into them on a large platter. She took their bowls and left them with the platter.
They both thanked her, declined the offer of more stew, and she went on her way. They stared after her. “Everybody has changed so much,” James said.
“I was thinking the same thing,” Conner said. “But for the better. Everyone, me included. For the better,” he said.
~
About two hours after dark the rain really begin to come down, turning the surrounding fields into small lakes of their own.
Several people were sitting around talking by the fires, different subjects, all relating to the new life they hoped to be living soon.
Conner and Katie were sitting, listening to the conversations, when the rain suddenly let up, and a sliver of moon broke through the clouded sky.
“Well,” Katie said, “now or never I guess.” Conner looked a question at her.
“Ladies room,” she said. “At least I won't drown now,” she laughed. She got up and walked away. Conner watched her go, thinking how much he loved her. As she turned the corner of the building, he turned back to the conversation he had been having with Aaron about how easy the steel structures would be to set up.
Katie slipped between two abandoned trucks and made her way around to the back of the main building of the truck stop. The building cast long shadows among the scattered wood pallets, junked trucks and oil barrels. A long wooden fence ran around most of it, blocking the view from the highway. She hurried over next to the wrecked front end of a big tractor cab and squatted down close to the ground, balancing against one of the tractor's tires with one hand. She finished and had just stood back up, fastened the snap on her jeans, when she felt the cold barrel of a pistol touch her neck.
“Well look at this,” a low voice said, “Ain't you something.”
Katie's heart crashed hard against her ribs. Her fingers, in the act of tugging her zipper home, froze. She sucked in a breath and tried to quiet her racing heart. Her voice sounded shaky to her ears as she spoke.
“What... What do you want?” she managed.
“Wha... What do you want,” the voice mimicked. “What do you think that I want?” he asked. One hand stroked lightly against her face, leaving the feel of calloused fingers and the smell of unwashed flesh.
“I think you know, Missy. I think you know.” His hand dropped down to her thigh and caressed it roughly, then moved around to her hand still frozen on the zipper “What's this?” he whispered in her ear. His breath smelled of rotting teeth and rancid food as it blew hotly across her face.
His hand batted her own away and fumbled with her zipper, jerking it roughly downward and plunging his fingers into the opening, pulling at her panties.
“Don't,” she whispered, “You don't have to do this.” Her voice sounded weak and panicked, and she hated it, but she couldn't get her heart to slow down or get her voice to sound normal or authoritative. She twisted to get away from him, but he had settled his weight on her, and she could not stand up or get a good footing so that she could turn and fight him. And the fear was loose in her. She couldn't think past it.
He ignored her, his rough hands forcing her jeans down and grasping at her panties once again.
“Please,” she said, “don't. It doesn't have to be this way.”
~
Arlene turned into the corner of the building to find a private spot to use. The other ladies had been coming back here all night long. It was about as private as you could hope to get. She was just about to step into the fenced in area when she heard the voices of a man and woman.
Oh Damn, she thought, looks like I'm about to interrupt something. That made her smile, but her next thought was a little less charitable. So where am I supposed to go?
She turned to leave when the voices came again. And something about the woman's voice stopped her in her tracks. Something about the woman's voice sounded, well, wrong, she told herself, upset. She waited a second but heard nothing more. Maybe it was just a little argument between the two of them, she thought. Either way it's not my business.
She had made up her mind to turn around, was actually on the brink of walking away, when she caught movement over by the wreck of a big rig truck. The woman's voice came again, crying out in pain, but was quickly muffled as she fell to the ground. She was pushed, Arlene's mind told her. And then she saw the shadow of the man kick the shadowed form on the ground and then fall on to her.
Arlene unsnapped her 38 caliber pistol as she ran to where the couple struggled on the ground. The woman's jeans were around her ankles. A split second later she recognized Katie and realized the man was ripping at her panties dragging them down, a pistol pushed into her neck.
Arlene pushed the muzzle of her own gun against the base of the man's skull. “Let her go, Mother Fucker, let her go.” She was fighting to control her anger.
The man jerked in surprise but recovered quickly. He fumbled with his own pants zipper trying to get it back up. “I'll fucking kill her, you bitch. I will. Fuck off, I'll do it,” the man said. His gun hand twitched, pressing the barrel hard into Katie's neck.
“Don't,” Katie cried, “Don't.”
“Get that gun off my neck you fuckin' bitch, or she's done, I'll do it!” His gun hand twitched again and the barrel left Katie's neck. Arlene pulled the trigger. Both guns went off.
~
Katie screamed, scrambled backwards and away. Arlene went with her pulling her along, away from the man whose blood began to fountain up into the air. “It's okay, it's okay,” she told her.
Arlene managed to gather Katie into her arms ignoring the blood that was splattered across both of them. Seconds later the back area was full of people as everyone came running. They all came to a fast halt as they came upon the scene. Conner among them.
It took a few heartbeats for him to take it all in and then he ran to Katie, pulled her from the ground and gathered her in his arms. He was still holding her a minute or so later when Amy came with a blanket and covered her up. Conner gathered her up in the blanket, and she burrowed her face into his chest as he walked out and around to the front of the building, away from the body of the man.
The rain began to pick up in a fast patter again. As the Moon slid back behind the cloud cover, the rain began to pour down once again, drumming hard against the steel roof of the old gas station.
“It's okay,” Conner whispered to her as he walked. He had no idea if anything was okay. But it was what you said, he told himself. Katie sobbed against his chest as he carried her. There was no protection from the rain as they walked across the front and they were both soaked by the time he stepped beneath the metal roofing that covered the gas pump area.
Sandy went ahead of them, opened the back door of one of the Suburbans, and Conner tried to place Katie on the seat but she refused to let go of him.
“She just wants to make sure you're okay.” His voice was choked with emotion and tears spilled freely down his cheeks.
Katie shook her head “I just want you to hold me, Conner. I'm okay. Just hold me.” Conner climbed carefully into the back seat holding Katie and Sandy shut the door.
~
Arlene stood, grim faced, the rain pouring down, her pistol back in its holster.
“What happened?” Amy began.
“Exactly what it looks like,” Arlene said. Her voice was high and shaky. The adrenaline was still running through her body. David slipped an arm around her shoulders, and she let him hold her.
“Did he,” Amy couldn't finish and burst into tears. Aaron grabbed her as she began to kick the man's body in the pelting rain. He pulled her away and held her tight, speaking in quiet, soothing tones.
“He didn't!” Arlene said loudly. It was nearly a scream. A yell. A declaration. �
�I couldn't let him. I had to shoot. He would've... He would've done that, or killed her. I had to kill him,” she finished. Her resolve fell apart, and she folded into David's arms.
Dustin looked up at James and then down at the dead man. Jeff joined with them, and the three of them wrestled the man's body out through the fence and splashed across the muddy field for nearly a quarter mile before they came to the treeline. They were all out of breath. They all took a few deep breaths, and on three heaved the man into the tree line.
“I wouldn't bury that bastard if I could,” James breathed. He was still trying to catch his breath.
Dustin suddenly bent over and threw up on the ground and then dry heaved several times. He finally caught his breath, cleared his throat and spat into the mud. James and Jeff stood quietly for a second.
“Come on, son, let's go back,” Jeff said, laying an arm around his shoulder. The pounding rain followed them, seeming to make the muddy water at their feet jump straight up into the air as they splashed their way back across the field.
When they got back, the back area was empty. Janna and Lilly, along with an anxious looking Allison, met them under the steel roof with dry towels, clothing and hot cups of coffee.
“I made a big pot of it,” Janna said. “Looks like we're in for a long night.” She put one hand to her mouth and choked back a sob, clearing her throat. James pulled her to him and hugged her. He looked around at the blank and worried faces, and spotted Jake.
“Jake, let's get some bodies on lookout.” James said as he held Janna.
Jake nodded
“And, Jake?” He waited until Jake looked back at him. “Nobody goes anywhere without a guard. Nobody goes anywhere alone.” Jake nodded and walked away.
“Shh, Darlin',” James told Janna. “Shh.”
SEVEN
Conner and Katie
April 30th
She awoke with a start and jerked in his arms. He wrapped his arms around her and drew her close. “It's okay,” he said.
She raised her head, eyes puffy. “Is she okay?” She asked.
David held her eyes with his own. “She's better off than she would've been without you, Arlene,” he told her. “She finally let Sandy look at her. Some scratches, one cut on her leg, probably a piece of metal. That's it. Everybody knows, Arlene; she told them. If it hadn't been for you...” he let his words fade away.
“But I killed someone, David,” she said.
“And you had to. Sandy says she has a small powder burn on her neck. He fired. It was that close,” he told her. “And I'll say it, he would have raped her. He would've. She made that clear as well. He told her. There's no doubt in anyone's mind what would've happened if you hadn't been there,” he said.
“He did rape her. It's not just the sexual part, I'm glad he didn't get that far, but it's the whole act. He did. I'm glad he didn't get to the... the physical act though. I'm trying not to be vulgar. I hate what I saw. You know, I almost turned away. I thought it was somebody... A couple spending some time alone together. It was that close.” She held her fingers a quarter inch apart. “I almost turned away,” she repeated.
“But, you didn't. You didn't, and you stopped it. Now it's you I'm worried about, and Katie, and Amy. She's taking it hard too, but they're together right now so I think they'll make each other okay,” he placed his hands on her face and tilted her head up to his own. “I'm worried about you right now though. I need to know that you'll be alright. He was a piece of shit. Blunt, I know. To use your terminology, Vulgar. But he was. He's dead, and he needed to be.” He kissed her eyes. “No courts. No cops. It's just us, and somebody like that has to be dealt with. What else could you have done? What if he had gone further? What if he'd taken her? None of that happened because of you. You shouldn't feel guilty about a man like that. You shouldn't.” He kissed her eyelids again and pulled her close to him once more.
Conner, James and Amy had cleaned out a small corner of the truck stop diner, hung some quilts and blankets and made a quiet area for Katie.
She was clean and dry, a small pink band aid on one side of her neck, another on her knee. The powder burn hurt more than anything else did. Katie lay back on a pile of blankets, Amy beside her, arms entwined. They were talking in low tones.
“I've been that scared before,” Katie said. “But not exactly like that. Not in that way. I ran with a bad crowd for a long time... did some bad things. A guy raped me once. That was really bad, but I knew he wasn't going to kill me... hurt me past that. I know that doesn't make sense, but this guy meant to hurt me.” She pulled Amy closer to her and sobbed, trying hard to get her emotions in check.
“This girl tried to kill me once. She scared me that bad... maybe that bad,” her fingers twisted together in her lap. Amy placed her own hands over them and brought them to her chest. “I guess this was worse. What he would've done... And I'm sure he would've killed me after... after he.... He would've killed me anyway,” she said. Her voice was hoarse. She had no more tears to cry.
“But he didn't, and he can't ever do anything to you or anyone else ever again,” Amy said. “Not to anyone. And you're going to be okay...?” She said, asked.
Katie nodded. “I'm going to be fine. I've got you. I've got Conner. I'm going to work it out in my head. I... I just wonder how they're gonna look at me... think of me,” she said.
“The same as we always have. No pity. No disgust. Don't be afraid of that. Everyone here loves you. It's going to be the same, Katie, the same,” Amy said. She sat up, wrapped her arms around Katie, pulling her into her, and held her. And although Katie was sure she could not cry anymore, she did. She let Amy hold her as the hot tears coursed down her cheeks.
~
The rain was still falling. There were some periods of heavy downpour, some periods where it slacked off to almost nothing, but it never stopped; it continued to fall.
Conner stood, his feet in the muddy water of the field where it met the tree line. His hands were in his pockets. Aaron splashed up next to him, but Conner continued to stand, staring down at the man where he had been dumped at the tree line. He didn't react at all to Aaron’s presence.
The man lay face up, one side of his face missing, the remaining eye clouded over and dully reflecting the gray of the skies above them. Rain puddled in the cup of one ear. The water rose, reached some magic level and then it spilled from the ear and into the man's hair. A second later, it started all over again. Conner watched.
“You okay?” Aaron asked.
“Looks like anybody,” Conner said after a long pause. “Nobody special.”
Aaron nodded, unsure where Conner was going or exactly what he meant.
Conner sighed. “I had to look. See if he was some kind of freak. But I can't tell. He looks like anybody,” Conner said softly.
Aaron cast worried eyes over Conner. His body was hunched against the rain. His face like gray stone. His eyes bloodshot and bleary. He blinked raindrops away from his eyelashes.
“He could be anybody, Conner. You know that. Just a fucked up guy. But he's dead now, Man. He's dead now, Conner,” Aaron told him.
“Good thing,” Conner said softly, almost too faint for Aaron to hear.
“Hey, Man. Let's go back. This is no good, Conner. We'll get some coffee, warm up,” Aaron said.
“It's my fault, Aaron. I let her leave without her gun. I could've gone with her. I should have gone with her. Hell! I let things get lax. I did. And I know better. It's my fault,” Conner finished.
“Hey. You can't be serious, Conner. You were gonna go with her? No way. No, Man. You weren’t. None of us had thought of that or done that. Why would we? No,” Aaron told him. He looked out over the field which was quickly turning into a lake, then down at the man, then back up where Conner stood looking down. He spoke a little quieter, yet just as insistently when he began again.
“She didn't have her gun? You didn't remind her to take her gun? She took it off, man. Most of us did. It was the end of the da
y for Christs sake. And everyone was using that area all day and into the dark. Nothing happened. Nothing at all. The goddamned dogs were right there, never growled, barked, nothing. Your fault? Might as well say my fault. All of us.” He touched Conner's shoulder. Conner turned his eyes up from the man.
“If Amy had gone back there, I wouldn't have thought to go with her at all. I wouldn't have done anything different from what you did, man. Nothing. I would've wished I had. Who in fuck wouldn't in hindsight? I would've. But I wouldn't have. There's just no way you could have known, man,” Aaron said.
“Still,” Conner said.
“Fuck still,” Aaron said. “For real. There isn't a thing you could've done. Not a fuckin' thing. And this guy?” He looked down where the man lay. The ruined gray-pink of his face tilted up into the rain. “This guy's nothing now. Dead meat. The wolves will get him... or the wild dogs, or a bear, woodchucks! He's all done. You got to be concerned with Katie now. Fuck this guy. Fuck him right straight to hell,” Aaron spat.
Conner didn't speak, but his eyes came up from the corpse and fixed on Aaron's own. He nodded.
“Let's go, Man, before you get sick from the cold. Me too. Then what good will we be? Come on, let's go,” Aaron said. He turned and walked away and Conner went with him.
~
They slogged their way through the muddy field and back to the area under the steel roof. The morning was half gone. They were going nowhere today. James was working on a map spread out on a wooden table top and held down with broken chunks of cinder blocks. Aaron walked over to him, and Conner followed.
~
“Is this how sisters are?” Katie asked.
“I don't know, I never had one,” Amy said, “I know I never had a friend like you though.”
Earth's Survivors: box set Page 60