Embers of Anger (Embattled Hearts Book 1)

by Anna St. Claire

  Jackson was apprehensive with Ella, suspecting why she was there. He sipped a brandy, swirling the amber liquid between swallows.

  He had done nothing like what he was planning. And he had never felt so conflicted. If he were caught helping a Confederate to escape—much less a Confederate officer—he would be court-martialed for treason. He could even be charged with collusion with the enemy and hanged.

  His career had always been the most important thing in his life. If this went bad, his family would never understand; they would have lost their son, brother, and grandson. His grandfather, his father, and now he, had all served their country—each earning high honors for their devotion and sacrifice. A family tradition of service and honor would be sullied.

  Jackson shook off that thought, not wanting to focus on bad outcomes. The decision was made—it was the one his gut told him was the right one to make. He didn’t want to question that decision any further. He needed to be confident he could remove Nolan from this house without creating suspicion. Ha! That false confidence was why he was drinking brandy. How did his life get so complicated?

  Ella.

  This high-risk, career-ending decision was being made because of one woman. He had been resolute to never let his heart get involved again after the way it had ended with Maria. But she wasn’t Maria. She was genuine in her feelings, honest. He trusted her and, considering their beginning, that was quite a step. The door to the library opened and the object of his thoughts stepped inside.

  “You’re up. How are you feeling?” Jackson pushed his glass away and walked around the desk to where she stood.

  A gentleman would back up a step and give her space.

  The thought was only fleeting. He didn’t feel like being a gentleman.

  Jackson pulled her close to him, careful of the cuts on her back. The tension in her shoulders was palpable, but she didn’t pull away. The proximity of her body heated his blood and fired his imagination, pushing away the thoughts of career and failure. A familiar vision of his dreams caught his thoughts, one with her auburn hair covering his pillow and her green eyes looking into his face, warm and inviting. He wanted to kiss her and lose himself in making love to her. His body was already responding to those thoughts.

  “I suppose you have questions for me,” he murmured, admiring her beautiful face, her lovely cheekbones, and her lips. He was in love with her and could no longer ignore that truth. He wanted to make love to her, right here, right now.

  But Jackson was no fool. It wasn’t like Ella to be so pliable. She wanted something, too. He expected directness from her. He had answers, but he also had questions.

  Would she be honest with him? Did she have answers to his questions? The jasmine in her hair filled his senses. He closed his eyes, battling the effect it was having on him.

  “Yes,” she nodded, clearing her throat. “I want—no, I need to know what you plan to do with my brother.” She pushed away. Her arms folded about her, she looked him in the eye.

  Jackson watched her, studying her face. He was trying to decide how to respond. It wasn’t an easy answer. He knew there was more to Nolan’s story than he had let on, but right now he wasn’t interested in hearing that.

  He spoke, his voice steady as he kept her attention. “I will help Nolan leave.” He trusted her. “I don’t know when. Quietly say your goodbyes to him, Ella. It will be soon. And I am confident you will keep this to yourself. That is most important. If others hear of this, it would be bad… for both of us.”

  She dropped her arms, her eyes wide with astonishment. “Why are you doing this? I’m—I mean—I had not expected you to…” She let the statement dangle, as if unsure of how to finish it. “How are you planning to do this? Does—does Marshall know of your decision?” She stepped forward, touching his arm and peering into his face. “I’m still uncertain I heard you right.”

  “You did. I’m doing this, Ella. Can I count on your discretion? And Marshall does not know. I need to keep it that way.”

  She nodded, her mouth agape.

  “Good.” He took advantage of her silence and pulled her back to him. His finger skimmed her chin, cupping it in his hands. Her lips looked warm and lush. He wanted her.

  Jackson slanted his lips and brushed hers softly. Feeling no resistance, he kissed her again, this time longer and with more force, more passion. His hands released her shoulders and moved down her arms to caress her waist. He tugged her closer, his hands covering her rear. His body was reacting—strongly—with need.

  His mind battled his conscience while his lips conquered hers. Should he continue to hold her so closely? She would feel his arousal. That was only a fleeting thought. He was not letting her go.

  She opened her mouth as if to say something, and he slid in his tongue. Their tongues met and caressed before he swirled his around the inside of her lips. He could feel her pulse responding, sending his own heartbeat into a faster rhythm. The kiss set his blood on fire. She tasted of honeyed tea and cinnamon. He wanted to possess her.

  Scraping feet sounded from upstairs and reminded him the door was not locked. Nuzzling her, he glided his kisses along the edge of her chin and down her throat, eliciting soft moans from her as he edged the two of them towards the door and locked it. He looked down at Ella to see if she objected. Hearing none, he backed her up and pushed the paperwork off the desk.

  “Jackson, someone might hear.”

  “Then let’s keep it low.” He nibbled on her ear. He felt alive when she was near, and he needed more of her. Jackson unbuttoned the front of her dress, lowering the sleeves from her shoulders. He brushed Ella’s lips, then lifted her up and sat her on his desk, still kissing her. Lifting his lips only slightly, he peppered kisses down the column of her neck and onto her décolletage. Tugging, he released her breasts from their confines and suckled them, first one, and then the other. Her breathing increased its pace. He could hear her heart pounding. She was affected, and she wasn’t turning him away.

  His hand sought the bottom of her skirt and moved up the interior of her thigh, finding its way to her center, its outer curls moist with desire.

  He inserted his index finger and moved it in and out. She gripped his shoulders, moaning. Her hands broke their grip, and she grabbed his hair, fingering the curls at the nape of his neck as she pulled his head towards hers. His ears filled with sounds of her heated panting, igniting him.

  Desire consumed him. Jackson leaned her back and stood over her, his eyes lost in the forest green of hers, his member straining against the confines of his pants, throbbing against the wet heat of her core. Her eyes shuttered as her pulse quickened and her panting became louder. He reinserted his finger and added a second, increasing his pace. She opened her eyes, and he covered her lips with his, stifling her scream as she shook with pleasure. He moved the edges of her skirt out of the way, pushing it up and laying it on her stomach He could smell her scent of sex and wanted more. He pushed her knees apart and crouched between her legs, his tongue probing and licking as she writhed above him.

  He moved up and kissed her lips and then stood and moved a step away from her. They were both panting. He wanted so much to keep going, but he couldn’t allow himself. “Ella. I should not have done that, but I cannot say I am sorry. I wanted this, and I want more. Ella.”

  Her eyes searched his face. A long moment ticked by before she responded. “I rather liked it. I know I could have stopped you… but I didn’t want to stop you.” She looked away, a blush stealing its way up her neck and face. “I have never… I have never been kissed by a man before you. And I have never imagined these feelings. My body feels tingly and hot. I think it must mean I want… more.”

  With misted eyes, she gripped his arms. “I had no idea what it could feel like. I wondered, but would have never imagined...” She trailed off into a whisper. Pushing forward, she reached her arms around his neck and brushed her lips against his.

  Jackson didn’t need a better invitation to kiss her. He pu
lled her close and coaxed her mouth open with his tongue, nibbling her lip. She opened for him and he poured himself into his kiss.

  Holding her shoulders, he broke the kiss and pushed her back to see her face. “We should stop. If we get carried away, someone could find us here. I want you. I do.” He brushed his lips along the edge of her chin, trying to slow his own heartbeat.

  She held his hands and looked up at him. “Mmm. I think I want you, too. Is that why my body feels so strange?”

  Jackson felt a shot to his heart. “Perhaps that is happening.”

  Ella rested her head on his chest, her voice a soft whisper. “Thank you for what you are doing for my brother. I realize what you must risk, to help him. All you’ve done since the first day I met you was look out for me and my family.” She pulled back to look in his face.

  He held her hands and gazed into her eyes while his thumbs circled her inner wrists. “I plan to help Nolan leave, but he cannot come back until this war is over. You understand that, right?” He stared up at the ceiling for a moment, thinking about what he was about to say. I know that there is more I should know here. I need her to tell me if I’m to help.

  His fingers stilled, and he studied her face. “I know there is much that I still don’t know about your brother’s presence here. His story is too simple. I cannot help but wonder if… can there be anything else that you can tell me?” He waited. “You can confide in me. I want you to trust me. The more I know about how he could sneak onto the plantation, the easier it might be to make sure he gets out of here undetected.” He looked into her eyes, unsure of how she would respond or if she would trust him.

  “I’m not sure what else I can tell you.” Ella wiped her hands on her dress and then clasped them in front of her. She looked up into Jackson’s eyes. “You trusted me. I want to trust you, believe you... but this is crazy…”

  She nibbled her lower lip, struggling. “Nolan showed up weeks ago burning with fever and we weren’t sure he would survive.” She moved away and folded her arms across her chest, hugging her sides.

  Anger surged through him at the thought Nolan Whitford had been right under his nose for three weeks, and he had seen nothing. He fought his emotions, clenching and unclenching his teeth. He tried to quell his anger, rationalizing that he was doing this—helping her brother—of his own free will. He wanted a chance with Ella, and he again justified his decision.

  Jackson’s thoughts traveled back to an earlier conversation with Ella. She had seemed preoccupied. There had been no telltale signs, but now he realized she must have been complicit in hiding her brother.

  This is going nowhere. Get over it, Jackson. You’ve made your decision.

  He needed to get Nolan away from here. If Ella’s cooperation with the enemy were known, her life would also be in danger.

  He had promised her he would not hold him, but this news upset him. Jackson fought not to show his frustration.

  How could he have been here all this time? Where was he?

  Jackson stepped away, allowing only a slight shake of his head in disbelief, careful not to betray the depth of his disappointment.

  He had already promised her, and he was a man of his word.

  “Where? I want to know. Where was he all this time?”

  The sound of boots coming down the hall stopped their conversation. Heavy steps halted at the door, and then there was a knock. “Jackson? Are you in there?”

  Marshall. His timing is awful sometimes.

  Jackson schooled his features and tried to calm his ragged breathing. Holding his finger in front of his lips, Jackson signaled for her to be quiet.

  Ella answered with her eyes, then straightened her dress and quietly sat in the chair in front of Jackson’s desk. She was careful not to make a sound when she sat down. She folded her hands in front of her, but she had to work to calm her breathing.

  Satisfied Ella wouldn’t be seen as compromised, Jackson called out from behind his desk. “Marshall. Come on in.”

  “The door appears locked.” Marshall rattled the door handle and then shook it again. “If you are busy, I can come back,” he added with a teasing tone.

  “No, no, not at all. I’ll be right there.” Jackson smiled at Ella and allowed his chair to scrape against the floor marking his movements.

  He walked to the door, unlocked it, and opened it in one swift movement.

  He waved him in. “We were just catching up. Miss Whitford—Ella, was asking what happened to the men that held her at the cabin. She is feeling more herself.”

  Marshall strode through the door and smiled at Ella. “Hello, Miss Whitford. It’s nice to see you up and about.” He tossed a folded paper onto Jackson’s desk. “Seen this?”

  “No. What is that?”

  “We might be on the right trail. Bushwhacking and murder on small farms in the area—gruesome stuff. One even happened when Jason and his men were holding Miss Whitford. Read it. It’s unbelievable. It details the exploits of two former Confederates from the 26th that were discharged when Vance was made aware that they were married to each other.” He paused and glanced in Ella’s direction. “This is the thing we discussed with Nolan.” Marshall moved his gaze back to Jackson and continued, “They are suspected of killing innocent Southerners—women and children. They kill the homesteaders and then steal horses. Nolan was right. They seem to be on the side of the Union. I think we need to send a detail after them.”

  “Any sign where they went?”

  “No, sir. One of the latest victim’s children hid and came to town after seeing her mother killed.” His throat worked; he struggled to speak. When he did, his voice was full of emotion. “The child secreted herself under her bed and had to watch what they did to her mother and siblings. She was picked up on the road to New Bern by a patrol and brought to town. She described them as a man and woman dressed as soldiers. Confederate soldiers. Her description matches the couple Whitford told us about.”

  “Who? Who was killed so viciously?” Ella struggled to stand.

  “I don’t know the names, but they are in there.” Marshall pointed to the paper sitting on the corner of Jackson’s desk.

  Ella’s eyes widened as she read the paper. “This is horrible. I know he is okay, but I have this overwhelming need to check on Aiden.” She gripped the chair. “What are you going to do to protect us?”

  “We need to organize a large posse to protect the citizens of the town and the surrounding area. Ella, would you be willing to help us map out where there are other families in the remote lands around us?” He was anxious at this news.

  “Yes. I will do the best I can.” She wrapped her arms around herself.

  “Right. I’m on it. Jackson, we can ride out tomorrow.”

  “Thank you, Marshall. I’d like you to be in charge, but let’s give the others a little time to get involved in this manhunt.” Jackson was trying to make it seem like he was being fair to everyone. He wanted less attention between where he was and about thirty miles west.

  “Thank you. As you say, Colonel.” Marshall saluted. Turning on his heels, he left the room.

  Alone again, Jackson turned his attention back to Ella. His breathing still felt ragged despite his efforts to slow it down. He wondered if Marshall had noticed. Their passion had exploded earlier, and he knew if he touched her, they would be back to where they were before Marshall’s abrupt arrival. He couldn’t chance that again… not here in the library. He needed her near him. Her presence helped make sense of this craziness.

  While he said nothing, Jackson had followed the news on the Blacks, and Marshall had just provided the opportunity he had hoped to find. Nolan needed to go west. He would send Marshall and his men east, on a circuitous route around the area to search for this rogue couple out pillaging the landscape. There would be a lot of activity.

  If my hunch is right, their direction will be to head east. Nolan and I need to leave in two days.

  Chapter 23

  Nolan had said his
goodbyes. He tried to focus on what was before him, but his heart kept tugging on his mind. This war was costing him more than he had realized.

  When he had taken Aiden and Bo fishing, he hated to pull up stakes and go back to the house. Aiden had caught on so fast. The little fella had grown up in the space of time he’d been gone.

  His little sidekick, Bo stayed by Aiden's side. After the kidnapping, it seemed the dog had also matured. He was more protective of Aiden, running alongside him, rather than ahead or behind him. He was a true friend for his brother.

  His biggest concern was Sara. The thought of her made his chest hurt. He had been in love with her since her father had taken over their church near New Bern. The blonde little girl with braids was always with his sister and had become part of their family, as had her brother, Charles.

  He and Charles had been best friends. Charles had followed his father’s footsteps and become a pastor at a church in Virginia. What was the name of the church? Shaking his head, he tried to recall.

  He hoped to see Charles again, but he knew Charles’s activities were also dangerous during this war. Nolan didn’t want to do anything that could compromise him. He and Charles had always been the best of friends. One was never without the other growing up.

  As they had approached manhood, Charles had left for seminary. The war had begun, and it wasn’t long before Nolan got the call to help his Southern brothers in gray.

  When he ran into Charles, it was unexpected. Charles was performing a service for several dead Union soldiers near Richmond. Nolan had just begun his mission and was undercover as Private White. There had been a tense few minutes when Charles recognized him in the Union garb, but his friend seemed to sense there was more to it. He had nodded towards Nolan and invited him to join. They talked afterward.

  Charles saw his role as more than a pastor. He felt responsible for souls. While he felt God’s calling for all souls, none were dearer to him than his Southern brothers. He was doing what he could, as opportunities presented themselves, to help the cause.