The Daughter He Never Knew

by Linda Barrett

  He reached the microphone and gazed out at the audience. She knew exactly when he spotted her. His head stilled, a grin appeared and he nodded.

  “I’m glad you decided to come,” he said, looking from Lila to the general audience. He waited a beat, then added, “You mean, like at all the other schools I visit, you didn’t have a choice?”

  Some of the students started to laugh as Lila slipped into an empty seat in the back row. She and the students knew the assembly was mandatory, but Jason had already managed to get the group’s attention as well as hers.

  “My name is Jason Parker,” he began, “and I graduated from this very high school nine years ago. In fact, so did my brother, Jared. Except he’s not here to chat with you today.”

  Lila found herself at the edge of her seat, listening hard. How much was Jason going to tell about that night? And would he reveal more of himself?

  “Jared and I were twins,” he continued. “Do we have any sets of twins in the audience today?”

  Lila, along with five hundred other people, looked around the room. Six youngsters stood up. Two boys, four girls, two of them Jane Fisher’s daughters.

  Jason kidded around with them for a minute, pretending not to know that twins could come in different genders. The audience was relaxed, and Jason looked like he was having a good time.

  “We’re going to narrow this down now,” said Jason. “Will sister and brother teams remain in their seats and the identical twins come—on—down.” His imitation of a game-show host was right on.

  The Fisher girls were dressed exactly alike and sported identical hairstyles. From the distance, Lila couldn’t tell Amy from April. She doubted anyone else in the audience could, either.

  Jason soon proved her hypothesis. He had some fun with the group trying to tell the girls apart. No one could. Lila realized that his joking was simply his means of getting the youngsters totally focused on him and the girls on the stage. And he’d succeeded well.

  “So, Amy and April, are you both going to the prom tomorrow night?”

  They nodded.

  “Are your dates in the audience?”

  “Yes.” A duet.

  “Are they nice guys?”

  Giggling, they said, “Yes,” again.

  Jason cocked his head. “Let’s see about that.” He asked the two boys to stand up. “The girls say you’re a couple of good guys. I hope you can prove them right.”

  He paused and scanned every section of the auditorium. “We all know that the legal drinking age in this state is twenty-one, but let’s get real—some of you won’t observe the law.” He eyed the two boys again. “My point is that good guys take responsibility. So who’s the designated driver for the prom?”

  Simultaneously, each boy pointed toward the other. “He is!”

  Giggles sounded. Moans. Heads were shaking, including Jason’s. “My, my, my,” he said. “Pilgrim Cove, we have a problem!” After the boys sat down, Jason said, “Let’s see what could happen on prom night to these two couples.”

  Suddenly, Lila’s stomach felt jumpy. She gripped her hands together, knowing Jason had finished with the fun stuff and was getting into the meat of the program. Prom night. And what could happen. Sharp memories stabbed her like heat lightning. Quick. Then gone. She wasn’t sure she wanted to go back and relive the horror. She looked at Jason chatting with the kids as if it were the most natural thing in the world. And he put himself through his own memory album every time he did a presentation.

  As Lila watched, the twins went to the side of the stage. A white curtain came down and the house lights darkened. A spotlight shone on the curtain. The two girls could be seen only in shadow behind it. They were seated facing the audience and the auditorium was silent.

  Without warning, a loud roar of a car engine filled the room. Everybody jumped, including Lila. The twins began to scream. “Slow down! Watch the road! Watch!” Then shrieked, “Oh, my God. Omigod! No! We’re…we’re…! Ma-a-a! M-o-m!” A huge crash. The sound effects had Lila reeling. It happened too fast. Just like real life.

  Silence. Darkness.

  Then a spotlight shone on one twin standing at the side of the stage. Bandages covered her head. She limped forward holding on to a cane and looked at the audience.

  A familiar melody filled the room and the injured girl began to sing in a clear soprano that conveyed the message:

  “Two girls glance in the mirror,

  One face is all they see,

  Along the shore, they are no more,

  What’s left of them is me.”

  Lila felt tears run down her face, her heart in a million pieces for the boy twins she had known. She’d buried the details of this part of the story for so long that now she sobbed into her hands. It took a young girl with a voice. It took Jason’s words. She reached for a tissue… Oh, God, there was more.

  The spotlight had moved across stage to the second twin who sported identical injuries and bandages. She sang:

  “In my dreams, I’m in school again,

  With my sister by my side,

  In my dreams, we’re just starting out…”

  Her voice broke. She spoke to the audience: “We had everything ahead of us…plans for college…falling in love…a life….” She shook her head, then finished the verse.

  “We had the whole world big and wide.”

  Lila’s eyes never left the stage. She barely blinked.

  The melody on the piano accompanied the sisters as they limped toward each other. When they met, they turned toward the audience and joined the piano to repeat the last verse. Now, they held hands, they looked at each other, and when the final notes lingered, they wrapped themselves in each other’s arms and held on.

  The piano faded, leaving a hushed silence. And then came the applause. Huge applause. The house lights were turned up, and once again Jason took the stage, keeping the girls at his side.

  He looked at the audience. “Now, where are those supposedly ‘good guys’ accompanying these young ladies tomorrow night?”

  The same two boys stood up.

  “Who’s the designated driver?” asked Jason, cupping his hand behind his ear.

  “I am,” said each one in a loud voice, both pointing at themselves this time.

  Spontaneous applause mixed with laughter again before the boys sat down. The two girls left the stage and found their own seats.

  Once more, Jason looked out at the audience. “My brother died on the night of our senior prom. He drank too much and crashed himself headlong into a telephone pole. And he was gone. Just like that!” He snapped his fingers. “Man, that ticked me off! Because I loved him, and I miss him every single day of my life.”

  “And so do I!” came a deep voice from across the room. Sam Parker stood up and walked down the aisle like a man on a mission.

  “Dad!”

  This part wasn’t planned. Jason looked too surprised and more than a little concerned. Even Rachel stood up and watched Sam as he came forward. Again, Lila sat on the edge of her seat.

  Sam climbed the steps to the stage and took the mike right out of Jason’s hands. Jason’s gaze rested on Lila, and he put his palms out in question. She shook her head.

  “Most of you know me or have been in my store at one time or another,” began the older man. “But in case your father shops somewhere else, my name is Sam Parker, and this is my son, Jason Parker. He worked hard for us today, and I’m very proud of him. So proud, in fact, that I think the sun came up this morning just to hear me crow!”

  Sam? Was that the peaceful Sam Parker Lila knew so well? Or thought she knew. Man, the ROMEOs were going to be mad they missed this. Lila studied Jason’s dad. He was just as comfortable in front of an audience as Jason. But who was his real target? The kids or his son? Then it clicked for Lila. The kids didn’t care about Sam’s pride in Jason. But Sam wanted Jason to know and had grabbed his chance. In public.

  “Nine years ago,” continued Sam, “Jared died and Jason disapp
eared. Maybe you remember your parents talking about it. I lost two children that season. One on prom night, and one a month later. Can you imagine losing two children?

  “We don’t want to lose any more young ones in Pilgrim Cove, so here’s what we’ll do. You’ll call me!” Sam walked up and down the stage looking at every part of the audience. “I’m the one to phone if you can’t call your parents. Not only on prom night, but on any night that you’re in trouble. I don’t gossip, and I don’t preach. But I’ll be there for you because…well, the truth is, that I wasn’t there for my son when he needed me. Somehow, this boy of mine—” he slapped Jason on the back “—figured all this out by himself. Pretty darn smart if you ask me. So, I’m crowing.”

  Jason faced the kids, leaned over and spoke into the mike. “And you thought your parents were the only ones in the world who enjoyed embarrassing their kids!”

  The youngsters were eating it up, thought Lila. They were eavesdropping with Sam’s permission on someone else’s drama.

  “I always leave time for questions,” said Jason, reaching for the microphone. “And because my dad decided to join us, he’ll take some, too.”

  Someone asked why he left town. Jason spoke about his own feelings of guilt, his mother’s grief and reaction to seeing him. Sam spoke about being so concerned about his wife, he hadn’t paid attention to his son. Where did he go? How had he lived? Jason told them the facts.

  The next round of questions focused on music. Lila wasn’t surprised. Teenagers and music went hand in hand. Was Luis Torres going to come to Pilgrim Cove? What was he like? Was Jason really going to live here and write more songs? Did he need any backup musicians? That question caused a stir! Lila imagined a dozen boy bands popping up all over the peninsula.

  She admired how he fielded the questions without insulting anyone. No one, however, was asking the questions she wanted answered. It wasn’t until she heard her name being called that she realized her own hand was in the air.

  “When did you start drinking?”

  “I’m glad you asked. I started…when the loneliness finally destroyed something inside me…my spirit…my soul. It took a couple of years after I left town.”

  She wasn’t finished. “What made you stop?”

  “I drank heavily for two years. And then early one morning, I woke up in my car in front of my apartment building, and I couldn’t remember how I got there. Had I killed someone the night before? The thought scared me to sanity. That’s when I knew I was an alcoholic. That’s when I called for help. And when I sent you the message to forget about me.”

  HE KNEW HE’D SHOCKED HER when two minutes after answering her question, her seat was empty. She wasn’t standing in the back of the room, she was simply gone. But he’d had to respond to her question honestly, the way he always did at these programs. At a social event, he could joke about his ginger ale if necessary. But not here. Not when the whole point was education, and when “been-there, done-that” testimonies had the most effect on youngsters.

  Doubts riddled him. Would Lila ever learn to trust him again?

  He thanked the audience, thanked the twins and walked with Rachel and Sam to the front exit of the building. At least they were ecstatic about the program.

  “Looks like Jason’s got a new partner,” said Rachel, giving Sam a hug at the door. “And the kids have another adult they might trust.”

  “I’m game,” replied Sam, his questioning glance, however, focusing on Jason.

  “You were great, Pop! Just great. And we do not need to rehash that time in our lives over and over again between ourselves. Everything’s square. I’m glad to be home.”

  Rachel left them with a last thanks, and the two men walked out into the morning sunshine. And there was Lila, standing next to Jason’s car.

  “She waited,” whispered Jason. “I can’t believe it.”

  “She’s a smart girl, our Lila. And now I’ll be going. Good luck, son.”

  His dad was sounding more like Bart every day, but Jason was too intent on Lila to mention it. He walked toward her, looked into her concerned blue eyes and brushed his finger across her brow. “There. That’s better,” he said when the furrow smoothed it self out. “My heart stopped when I couldn’t find you.”

  “You knocked me on my keister, Jase. I needed to catch my breath.”

  “Sorry. But I can’t help being glad you asked the question. I’ve already told you I don’t drink hard liquor anymore. It’s the truth. Period. And I wanted the kids to know it.”

  But she remained silent.

  “Uh, you have anything else on your mind?” he said, encouraging her. “Any more questions?”

  “Yes,” she whispered. “But I’m afraid of the answer.”

  “Why?”

  “Because too much is at stake. I’m willing to walk into the shallow end of the pool with you, Jason, and I know you want it, too—but if you lie to me, I won’t swim to the deep end, and I really will never forgive you.”

  Lie? She thought he’d lie to her? Disappointment surged through him like a wave flowing from head to toe, but he forced his voice to sound calm, with no inflection, no indication of his feelings.

  “I’ve never lied to you, Lila, except for the original broken promise so many years ago. I’ve always been up-front, and I’m not changing my personality now.” He waited a moment, then felt his heart soften because she looked worried again. If only she’d trust him, trust herself. “I don’t lie, sweet heart, and I especially don’t lie to the people I love.”

  She stepped back. Her eyes flashed and her hands fisted on her hips. “So are you telling me that when you’re with Luis Torres and Mitch Berman and all those…those Hollywood stars at all those wild parties that go on out there, you’ve never had a drink with them? A beer? A vodka? Anything?”

  “Oh, Lila! I’m just a lowly hardworking song-writer. I’ve never tipped a glass with anyone in Hollywood or anywhere else for the last four years. And I don’t intend to.”

  Her eyes were clear. Sparkling now. She gave him a quick kiss on the mouth. “Good. I believe you.”

  He licked his lips. “You’re not worried anymore?”

  “Should I be?” she countered.

  “Actually, no. I’m a recovering alcoholic, Lila,” he said softly. “My experience scared me, and I checked myself into a clinic. That was my low point. I learned that sometimes you have to reach bottom before you can get to the top. Now I abstain from all forms of alcohol. I’m afraid to take a chance.”

  The smile she gave him reached her eyes. “Good choice. I’d be scared, too, if I didn’t know how I’d gotten home.”

  She was so cool about the question that had concerned him most. He didn’t understand why. “So, you don’t have a problem with this? You believe me?”

  “No problem. And, yes, I believe you.”

  She hadn’t hesitated, but he still must have looked confused because she reached up and gently cupped his face with her hands. “You really haven’t changed, Jason. You always shouldered more responsibility than was expected. You always seemed older than your years. Older than Jared, too. You’ve probably had awful dreams about what could have happened during the night you can’t remember. So of course, you’re abstaining. It’s so—you!” She brushed a kiss across his mouth.

  If he weren’t kissing her delicious mouth, he would have wept with relief. She believed him and believed in him. He’d thank her later, but right now he’d rather make love to her somewhere other than a school parking lot!

  “How about some lunch at Sea View House?” he whispered as he trailed a series of kisses toward her ear.

  Her delight at the suggestion sent his spirits soaring.

  “Granddad’s watching the office,” she said. “Let’s go.”

  HE’D WAITED TO MAKE LOVE with her for so long, he could wait a little longer. That’s what Jason told himself as he produced a couple of tuna sandwiches and brought them outside to the back porch. On the way to Sea View House, L
ila’s stomach had rumbled loudly, causing them both to laugh, and their tension had dissolved for the moment. Now Lila poured them both some iced tea. A breeze blew off the Atlantic, but the sun managed to warm the air enough for them to enjoy an alfresco meal.

  “I’ve rarely been back here,” said Lila as she gazed out at the ocean.

  “Back here as in on the porch? Or back here as in Sea View House itself?” asked Jason, interested in how she’d coped with all the reminders of their youth.

  “Sea View House. After you left, I didn’t want to come here,” she replied. “It was our place. Remember?”

  “Sure, I do. Convenient, you having access to Bart’s keys.”

  She shook her head. “I’m sort of ashamed of that now, but at seventeen you do all kinds of stuff.”

  “At any age, you rationalize all kinds of stuff to be with the person you love.”

  Her head jerked up and she stared at him. “Like uprooting yourself three thousand miles against your agent’s advice?” she asked softly.

  He smiled. “Exactly. Except I see it more like re-planting those roots, Lila.”

  She studied him carefully for a moment, took a sip of her tea and then replied, “Before those roots take firm hold, Jason, I’d really like to hear about the whole time you were away. The missing years.”

  Could this day get any better? It was the first time she’d asked him about his past in a supportive way, because she really wanted to know, because she cared. “I’ll do better than that, sweetheart, I’ll show you. Come on inside.”

  He brought her to the living room, sat her on the couch and gave her the first of his five binders. He knelt in front of her to give her a guided tour. “This one’s got the early days in it,” he said as he turned the pages. “Songs about leaving home, about trains and planes and ‘Running away—to work in a kitchen for cash-only pay.’”