Hudson and Kale both stared at me, taken aback.
“I’ve never heard anything like that before,” said Kale. “Did you even know that you were a werewolf before the change?”
I shut my eyes. “I don’t think I want to talk about this.”
It was quiet for several seconds.
I opened my eyes and looked back at the two of them. “What was it that you were trying to tell me? What was it that Kale figured out when he was a teenager?”
“How to shift whenever he wanted, of course,” said Hudson.
“And that’s something you couldn’t do before?” I said. “You needed your alpha to do that for you?”
“Exactly,” said Kale. “And it was an accident that I figured it out. I wasn’t trying to do it, or anything. I was doing something else entirely.”
I waited expectantly, but he didn’t say anything.
“What were you doing?” I asked.
Kale massaged the bridge of his nose. “Well, this is where it gets embarrassing.”
He didn’t elaborate.
I looked at Hudson, who was grinning. “What?” I said. “Come on, you guys can’t leave me hanging like this.”
Kale took a deep breath. “I was, um, jerking off, okay?”
Hudson snickered.
Kale turned and glared at him. “Hey, you thought it was awesome when I told you about it back then. And you’re the one who’s bringing it up now. So I don’t think you get to laugh at me.”
Hudson tried to stop laughing. “Sorry.”
“It’s not like you’re not still beating your meat every night anyway,” said Kale.
Hudson rolled his eyes. “Everyone masturbates, Kale. I wasn’t laughing at you because of that. I was laughing at you because you’re embarrassed about it.”
The two glared at each other.
I cleared my throat. “Can you two try not to be at each other’s throats? Everything sucks right now, and I don’t need you guys making it worse.”
“I really am sorry,” said Hudson to Kale. “I wasn’t trying to make you mad. Just tell her the rest of it.”
“The rest of it?” Kale glared at Hudson. “You want me to tell her what I was thinking about? Or what magazine I was looking at?”
Hudson rolled his eyes. “No. Explain to her why it works. How it works.”
Kale turned to me. “Well, it helps you relax. When you surrender to an orgasm, you stop trying to control your body. It’s the same way when you try to shift into the wolf. You just let go and let it happen. So that’s how it worked with me. I was lying there in my room, giving myself a happy, and suddenly I shifted into the wolf.”
“Tell her the best part,” said Hudson.
Kale furrowed his brow in confusion. “That was the best part. I shifted.”
“No, no, no. I mean the fact that you were self-aware after it happened.”
Self-aware, huh? I found that intriguing.
“See,” said Hudson, “the first couple times that we shifted into wolves, it was like going into a blackout. We would wake up, and we wouldn’t remember anything that happened while we were in wolf form.”
“That’s the way it is for me,” I said. “You mean it isn’t that way for you anymore?”
“No,” said Kale, grinning. “That first night, when I shifted into a wolf, I knew everything that was going on. I remembered all of it. And I had control over what I did in my wolf body.”
That sounded too good to be true. “Control?” I said in a tiny voice.
“Well,” said Hudson. “It isn’t the same as being human, not by a long shot. You can think, but it’s not the same way that you think when you’re in human form. But you’re still you, whether you’re a wolf or a human.”
Still me? I couldn’t believe that. I had spent years of my life feeling as if the wolf swallowed my identity whole. After all, the animal inside me had surged forth and done terrible things. Horrible, bloody things. When I thought about them, I only felt shame. The wolf wasn’t me. In the SF, they had assured me over and over again that the wolf was nothing more than a beast inside me. They likened it to a disease, a raging animal that destroyed everything in its wake. The basis of all of the training to keep my beast in check had been based on the idea that it and I were completely separate. Now, Hudson and Kale were telling me that the wolf was me.
I didn’t know how to react to that. On the one hand, it sounded too good to be true to have control over the animal within me. I couldn’t deny that it sang to me with a siren song full of brightness and perfection in the beautiful glow of the full moon. Some part of me yearned to be the wolf. On the other hand, all the evidence I had pointed towards the wolf being a monster. I wasn’t a monster. The monster wasn’t me.
“Anyway,” Hudson was saying, interrupting my thoughts, “that’s what we need to do now. For you.”
I gaped at him. “You want me to masturbate?”
Hudson chuckled. “Well, I wasn’t exactly what I had in mind. Although if you want to…”
My nostrils flared.
“I was thinking that we could help you,” said Hudson.
Now, I was livid. My voice was barely even as it came out. “I told you that I don’t want to have any more sex.”
“Well, this wouldn’t be sex,” said Hudson. “We’d just… get you going little bit. Help you relax.”
“We?” I said. I looked first at Hudson and then back at Kale. “I guess this is more of the dividing-me-in-half business?”
Kale raised his eyebrows. “Look, this is his idea. Leave me out of it.”
Hudson folded his arms over his chest. “Well, it’s not as if we both haven’t watched the other one screw her. So, I figure, how weird would it be to help her shift together?”
“Weird,” said Kale.
“No,” I said. “No, I’m not doing this. I don’t want to shift into a werewolf. I don’t want both of you helping me to… relax or whatever. Let’s just drop the whole thing.”
“Listen,” said Kale. “You do have to shift. Aren’t you hungry?”
That was the thing. I was starving. “I am hungry. But I don’t think it will work. There is no way I can relax and just let the wolf take over. And having both of you pawing me, well, that’s not going to make me relax.”
Kale’s mouth curved into a smile. “I don’t know. I think I’m pretty good at making you relax.”
I thought of Kale’s hands on my clit and felt turned on. I blushed.
Hudson took a step towards me. “I know I relax you.”
“But…” I chewed on my lip. “I don’t want to. I’m telling you both that I don’t want to, and I think you have to respect my decision.”
“I’ll just force you to shift again if you don’t let us try,” said Hudson. “And that looked like it hurt last time.”
I remembered the feeling of the claws ripping through my skin, all of my bones cracking at once. I shuddered.
“It doesn’t have to be like that, Piper,” Hudson whispered. He brushed my hair away from my face. “It can be so nice and easy.”
Kale moved behind me and began to massage my shoulders. “Just calm down, there, okay?”
Both of them touching me. Damn it, but I liked that. I shut my eyes, sucking in breath. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. I mean, here I was with two very hot guys who wanted to try to get me turned on. Together. It was kind of like being stuck in a trashy romance novel, wasn’t it? Was I crazy for fighting it?
They’re also keeping you captive in this cabin and trying to forcibly impregnate you. Plus, they want you to shift into a werewolf, which you hate doing. I grimaced. So, maybe there were good reasons to fight.
But I was exhausted and hungry, and I didn’t feel like I had a lot of fight left in me. Kale’s fingers worked the tension from my muscles, and that felt wonderful and freeing.
Hudson moved in front of me, and kissed me, thoroughly claiming my mouth with his. That felt good. I liked kissing Hudson. It was like coming home.
Hudson pulled back. His voice was soothing. “We should take your shirt off, Piper.”
“Definitely,” agreed Kale, his hands working their way down from my shoulders to the hem of it.
“I—”
“It’s going to get ripped when you shift otherwise,” said Hudson.
There weren’t that many clothes in the den closet, and I didn’t want them all ruined. I nodded. “Okay.”
The two men stripped my shirt off together, pulling it over my head. They tossed it on the ground, and surveyed me. I wasn’t wearing a bra, because I didn’t have one that fit, so my breasts were bare now. I swallowed.
The cool breeze of the outdoors tickled my skin, causing my nipples to tighten and stand up straight.
Hudson groaned. He reached out and touched the tip of my hardened nipple. “I want this in my mouth.”
“We’re helping her shift, remember?” said Kale, but he wasn’t taking his eyes off my breasts either.
Hudson nuzzled my neck, his voice close to my ear. “It’ll help you relax if we suck on your nipples, won’t it, Piper?”
I gasped.
Kale was already weighing one of my breasts in his hand, squeezing it gently.
“Wouldn’t it?” urged Hudson.
“I…” Heat was pooling between my legs, and I was feeling very aroused. The wolf inside me seemed to be stirring as well, which didn’t usually happen from something like this. But maybe it had something to do with their closeness. I was afraid of that, but I was also… oh, hell, I wanted them both to touch me. It sounded incredibly sexy. “Okay,” I whispered.
And Hudson captured one of my nipples with his mouth, letting out a growl of satisfaction.
Within seconds, Kale’s lips closed over the other.
They tugged at my nipples in separate erotic rhythms, each making me more and more turned on as they did so. I gasped.
I was so caught up in the sensation of both of my breasts being stimulated in this way that I hardly noticed as Kale unbuttoned my pants and slid them down.
But then his expert fingers were easing between the lips of my sex, and I was moaning.
Hudson kissed his way up my torso, his finger taking over for his mouth, teasing and pinching my erect nipple, wrenching gasps and sighs from me. His mouth tickled the hollow of my neck. “Feel good, Piper?”
I only groaned. Kale’s mouth was on one of my nipples. His fingers were in between my legs. Hudson was toying with my other nipple and his mouth was on the sensitive flesh at my neck. All of my sensual areas were being stimulated, and I felt like I was floating in pleasure. Everything felt amazing.
“Let it happen,” breathed Hudson, his lips moving to my ear lobe. He sucked the tiny nub of flesh into his mouth.
I squirmed against their caresses. My breath grew unsteady. Every place that they were touching me was on fire, and I was about to spontaneously combust.
“Let the wolf out,” said Hudson. “It’s easy, just let go.”
The wolf surged within me, clawing at the back of my neck. It wanted out.
I froze, and for several seconds, all that was flooding through me was fear. I didn’t want to shift into the wolf. I could only think of the pain of shifting, how terrifying it was. I couldn’t feel any of the good feelings anymore. The places they were touching me were as erogenous as someone rubbing the tip of my nose. I struggled to push the wolf down.
Kale moved his mouth off of my nipple. “She’s drying up down here.”
Hudson’s fingers stilled on my breast. He looked down. “You’re fingering her, man?”
“I thought we were trying to turn her on,” said Kale. “She likes that.”
Hudson glared at him. “You can’t stop pushing it, can you? I’m trying to do this with you, and all you want to do is take over.”
Kale straightened, removing both his hands from me. “Oh, you know what, that’s rich. Because you’re the one who couldn’t handle the idea of sharing before. You’re the one who ruined everything.”
Hudson let go of me too. His face was stony. “Don’t say anything about that. Don’t say anything about her.”
Slowly, I drew my arms up over my body, covering myself.
Kale shrugged. “Whatever.” He held up both hands in an I-surrender gesture. “You do it, then. Leave me out of it. I’ll wait and shift when you’re done.”
Hudson’s jaw twitched. “Fine.”
“Don’t fuck her, though. Don’t you dare think I’m giving you open season to put your dick in her.”
Hudson rolled his eyes.
“I mean it. If you try—”
“I’m going to get her to shift,” said Hudson. He turned back to me. “I have to get you close to coming, but not let you go over the brink.”
I swallowed. “I’m thinking that maybe I’m not so hungry after all. I don’t need to shift.”
Hudson still looked pissed off. He peeled my hands away from my breasts. He cupped the rounded mounds. rubbing his thumbs over my nipples.
Pleasant sensations rippled through me, despite everything.
Hudson leaned close. His voice was a tight whisper. “You like it when Kale touches your pussy, Piper?”
I shut my eyes. “Look,” I said, feeling desperate, “I’ve been trained to push down the wolf. You can’t just override that because you want to.”
“You let him do it a lot?” Hudson continued, the same barely controlled whisper. One of his hands was crawling down my torso, over my rib cage, my belly. “How often did you let him put his hands on you while you were staying with him? Once a day? Twice a day? Every hour on the hour?”
“I can’t do this,” I said. I didn’t like the tone of his voice. I didn’t want him touching me when he was angry like this.
Hudson cupped my vulva.
I could feel the heat of his palm radiating through my skin, and my clit twitched.
“I bet you just wandered around bottomless in his house, begging him to rub you,” said Hudson. “That what you did? That how much you like his hands here?”
I glared at him.
Kale chuckled. “I wish.”
Hudson’s face twisted. “Shut up.” He nudged a finger between my nether lips.
I groaned despite myself.
Hudson dragged the finger over my clit, soft and slow.
I twitched again.
Hudson’s other hand squeezed my breast. He buried his head against my shoulder. “So,” he muttered, “who does this better? Me or him?” His finger kept up its slow, steady onslaught.
My legs were shaking. “Hudson… Hudson, please…” I didn’t know what I was begging him. His fingers did feel good there, but there was so much fury behind his touch that there was a certain strange energy to my arousal. I felt out of control, and I didn’t like it.
But my body liked his fingers. It liked his strokes. I was opening up for him, growing moist and slick between my thighs.
And inside my body, the wolf was waking up again, crawling along my spine.
I tried to push it back down, but I kept getting distracted.
Hudson’s fingers on my clit pulled away my concentration, or he’d squeeze my breast again—a sensation that was almost painful but also pleasurable.
And the wolf was getting higher up my spine, closer to the surface.
My heart beat out a staccato rhythm, and my breath came in short gasps.
“Me or him?” whispered Hudson fiercely. “Tell me, Piper.”
I was going to come. I was close. My clit was throbbing, and my body was tightening—everything tightening, everything waiting to release….
But instead, the wolf ripped out of me.
I felt a sharp bit of pain at the back of my skull, as if something had been forcibly released there, but it faded fast. It was nothing like the other times I’d shifted.
I felt my body quickly slipping from one form to the other, and it was easy, just like changing clothes.
Within seconds, I was on all fours on the
patio. I shook myself.
I was a wolf!
I looked down to see my paws in front of me. Instinctively, I bent down to lick one of them.
I felt…
Wonderful.
It was as though I’d been trapped my whole life in the body of a human woman, but that I’d finally been freed. My wolf form was my true form, and I was now actually experiencing it for the first time. I had never felt better in my own skin.
I smelled Kale and Hudson close to me, and by the change in their scents’ pungency, I knew that they had shifted too, even before I saw them in their wolf form.
I was overjoyed to see both of them. I yipped, rubbing up against first Hudson and then Kale, pushing my head into their soft pelts.
We licked each other, saying hello.
And then Kale streaked off into the forest, and we all went after him, bounding under the starry sky, free and alive.
* * *
We hunted, and it was euphoric.
Nothing was better than rushing through the woods at night, stalking some quiet, twitching prey. I liked it when we sneaked up on an animal who was utterly unaware of us. I liked it when it got startled and took off in a run, and we had to chase it.
Yes, I especially liked the chasing.
There was something so perfect about that, so purposeful. It was the deepest joy I’d ever felt, but it was also wondrous because it was natural and instinctive. Every second of being the wolf was another second in which I felt at one with everything.
As a human, there was always so much confusion, so many decisions. But being the wolf was simple, and everything I did felt right. I knew that I was doing the right thing, because I didn’t even have a concept of the wrong thing. Wrong things happened to me. I didn’t do wrong things.
We caught our prey together, tackling it, biting it, tasting it. And we fed together, sucking down the blood and raw, red meat in the scant light. It was rapture.
When we were sated, we bounded back to the house and clamored back inside. I led them with me to the bedroom. We all leaped up onto the mattress, where we licked each other clean before curling up together in a big pile. I lay in the middle, with Kale and Hudson on either side of me.
Under a Raging Moon: Part Two Page 8