by Leaona Luxx
I don’t even remember sitting down, but I’ll never forget taking her hand in mine, it’s so cold. Covering both her hands with mine, I remember her feet. Finding them cold as well, I kick my shoes off, to put my socks on her. She loves mine— said they were thicker, kept her warmer. Once I replace my shoes, I take her hands again, willing her warm. Mom stands beside me before I realize she’s there.
“Malone, I understand you want to stay with her, but you’ve already been here so long. Won’t you run home, sleep and shower? I’ll stay with our girl until you get back. Cal can even drive you.”
I’m fixed on Hadlea. My heart tightens. “No, Mom, I can’t. I will not leave her. She’s here, I’m here.” Mom kisses the top of my head then leans in, kissing Hadlea’s cheek. They’re gone, and the sound of machines replace my thoughts.
The boys come to the room to see their mom, and I’m broken when they leave crying. Night turns to day, days turn to a week, as I wait patiently by her side. I lay with my head on Hadlea’s arm. Aksel is here again with his brothers. Lath speaks to me first.
“Hey Dad, let’s get you home for a while, Aksel and Emerson are gonna stay with Mom until we get you back.”
Scratching my face, I try to rationalize a shave and a nice hot shower.
“Maybe, get me some clothes, I can shower here.” Looking from one to the other, they laugh.
“Yeah, we thought you’d say that. Extra towels in the bathroom, bags by the door,” Hawk replies, as they begin laughing again.
“Besides ol’ man, you smell and look like shit,” Aksel laughs.
Standing slowly so I can stretch, I straighten that out. “Yeah. Well, this ‘ol’ man’ can still whip some ass, boys.” Fake punching Lath in the arm, he’s the biggest of them.
Just then, Hawk finishes me, “Well, Mom wouldn’t want us to beat your old ass, so go shower, Dad,” as he pushes me in the direction of the bathroom, shoving my bag in my hand. Will I ever get used to this? I watch them before I shut the door, kissing their mom, joking as they laugh together.
A nice shower and shave makes a new man, not to mention clean boxer briefs. Back at Hadlea’s side, the boys give me a little breathing room as we all sit talking.
“How long do you plan on staying? Just so it’s clear, we don’t mind taking a shift so you can go home to sleep. Anytime,” Hawk explains.
Staring at her, I can’t bring myself to leave her. “Maybe. I just keep thinking I need to be here. No other place more important.” Lath nods his agreement, Hawk lays his hand on my shoulder, and Aksel grins his acknowledgment. Hadlea’s hand tugs on mine.
“I’m just happy they got you to shower, baby.”
All eyes are on the raspy voice as she opens her eyes wearily. Standing so fast, I knock my chair to the floor so I can kiss her. Aksel is out the door, I’m sure to get a nurse as both Hawk and Lath are by her side.
“My girl is awake. How I’ve missed those green eyes. I love you, beautiful.”
Lea
There’s so much pain. I keep trying to block it out. Voices so loud, they make me wince. Noises of all kinds, as if my sensory perception is on high alert. In the distance, I hear crying. The sweetest little whimper between the heart-breaking sobs. Now, a little snub.
Hearing my name, I try to look for the person saying it. Try as I might, my eyes won’t open. No words come, no matter how I try. What’s going on? Malone?
My heart aches as a warm hand is placed on mine. Thank you for making my feet warm. I love Malone’s socks. Why can’t I open my eyes? Everything fades into the darkness again.
How long has it been? Why can I not speak or even open my eyes? Malone is singing to me; I love his voice. Try as I might, I can’t keep count of the days. Our family filters in and out, each talking with Malone, caressing my hand. Latham, Hawkins, and Aksel visit with me often. Talking about one another and the girls.
Malone’s had a death grip on my hand for far too long— it’s sweaty, clammy feeling. If I could move my arm, I would. Geez, has his head always been this heavy? Malone is snoring ever so lightly. He’s so tired. I hear the door open, and it’s my boys. Malone stirs while they all talk.
Malone’s been here day and night? Never left my side? Lath, Hawk, and Aksel finally pressure him into a shower. My hand is encased in Malone’s once again; warmth invades my skin. His clean smell, like linen and sawdust, permeates my nostrils. I’m enraptured.
God, how I love this man. I just need to see him. Touch him. Kiss him. If I could just make my eyes open or at least tell him.
Laying here, I listen to the boys and Malone talk with each other. Each of the boys now calls him Dad. Not sure when that happened, but I love it. It seems natural, easy. Right. Pride and love fill my heart.
“I’m just happy they got you to shower, baby,” I say as I will my eyes open. Once my focus returns, I’m gazing into my favorite set of blue eyes— Malone’s.
“My girl is awake. How I’ve missed those green eyes. I love you, beautiful,” he says as he leans in to kiss me.
Before I can answer, the room is abuzz with hospital personnel, but Malone never leaves my side. I’m poked and prodded all the while lost in Malone’s eyes as he never let’s go of my hand, even when asked.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
One
Hadlea turns her head ever so slightly until our eyes meet, there she is. “Hey, baby. I love you. You are never allowed to scare me like this again, you got it?” The sweetest smile known to man spreads across her gorgeous face as she places her hand on my cheek.
“I’m sorry. I’m a rebel like that, you know. Have you seen them?”
Shaking my head in response, I reply, “I need you to know, there has never, nor will there ever be, anyone I love more than you, Hadlea. Marry me. Be with me forever. Marry me?” She licks her lips slowly, a crooked grin on her face as she cocks her brow with a wrinkled nose.
“Haven’t you already asked? And I believe I answered it.”
Looking over her features, I eye her suspiciously. “I have, you did. But we haven’t yet.” Now smiling from ear to ear she cuts me to the bone.
“Yet, there is no ring. Once that’s fixed, we’ll do the other.”
I thought so. I finally get the chance to fix an error of a lifetime. From my pocket, I pull the little Kelly green velvet box with silver clasp. Knowing she has yet to see my hand or the box, I have to ask.
“So, you’ll not marry me without a ring?” Rolling her head closer to me, her voice is almost a whisper.
“I would marry you if all you could offer was your love and devotion. I would marry you if all you had was your heart to give. I want nothing more than to be by your side for eternity.”
Well, hell. Hadlea always has a way of letting me know, it’s less about what is offered and more about actions. “Well, I’ll just take this back.” Raising my hand above the bed to show her. Squinting, she looks from it to me and back again.
“Okay. Thank you for getting it, but I honestly do not need it to be tied to you. My heart will be forever.”
Fuck. She’s ripped me to shreds. “Baby, I ordered this for you months ago. Made for you, only you.”
Opening the box, I take the platinum-ensconced diamonds in my hand, and I slip it on her finger. Still, she hasn’t looked at it.
“Hadlea. I took a picture of your parents’ rings then found the granddaughter of the jeweler who made the original. I had this duplicated for you. It took so much longer than I thought. I apologize you didn’t have it sooner.” Taking her hand, I kiss the ring where it sets on her finger.
She gazes at the ring. Without warning, her lips are on mine. As she pulls away with an impish grin, her gaze shifts to over my head. “Are you ready to meet your children?” Her face lights up while straightening in the bed. Before I can answer, a nurse places a little bundle with a swath of dark hair and a dimple in his right cheek, that are as plump as his thighs.
The other arm is filled with the second tiny bundle. Sh
e has a head full of strawberry blonde hair and apple green eyes with the most perfect, pouty lips that rival her mothers. I’m awestruck at their beauty. Two of the most perfect people in the world and they’re mine.
I look at Hadlea; she’s glowing, breathtaking. Leaning closer, I press my lips to hers, telling her everything I can’t articulate at this moment. Releasing her, she reaches over to run her finger across our daughters’ lips.
“She’s absolutely gorgeous.” Turning to our son, her finger glides across his brow. “Just like his father, perfection.”
“Thank you. My life is complete because of your love.” I kiss her madly.
We sit fawning over our new additions. After some time, I excuse myself so I can let our family know how everyone is doing and they can see Hadlea in a few minutes.
Entering the waiting room, I see our family has taken over half of the room. We have a big family, everything I ever wanted, and Hadlea’s responsible for it. Lath spots me before anyone else.
“Hey. How’s Mom? Do we get to see them?”
I drop my head, shaking it slightly as I lose the battle with my emotions. “She’s good. They’re perfect. And yes. We’ll all see them as soon as they are settled for a few minutes. I’m in awe of her. How she loves her children.”
“She couldn’t have done it without you.” Lath bear hugs me just as his brothers jump in. My boys and I hug for several minutes, no manly back pat.
Lea
“Thank you. Will they stay in here with me?” I ask while watching over my babies.
“Just for a little while, Hadlea. You’ve had a long day, and you all three need some rest. However, if we don’t let the rest of the brood in the waiting room back, there might be anarchy.” Doctor Michaels chuckles.
She’s probably right, I giggle.
“I really don’t understand what took place, Hadlea. Hopefully, once the blood test results are in, we can determine what went wrong. I decided on a toxicology, just to rule out everything. I’m just happy you were here.”
She exits the room, leaving me there thinking of the day’s events. I’m utterly exhausted, and I just want to have Malone here with us. There’s a knock at the door, it slowly pushes open, and Malone pops his head around it.
“Hey, baby. Are you ready for us? I don’t think we can keep them away any longer.” He comes through the door followed by our family. I really wish my parents were here.
“Hey. I’m happy you’re back. They’re over there, not for much longer I don’t think. They said they’re both exceptional for being preemie’s.”
“Because you’re an exceptional mother.” Malone kisses me gently.
Sitting beside me on the bed, I watch as everyone takes stock of the twins. They are perfect.
“So, what are we calling them?” Thayer asks as she goes over every inch of their little bodies when Hawk pipes up.
“He was six pounds, four ounces. Twenty-one inches. Dude, were you trying to walk out.” Everyone laughs as he continues. “She was four pounds, eight ounces. Eighteen inches. Poor little girl, brother was taking all the good stuff.”
All three brothers stand beside their siblings’ bed, cooing and staring. It’s just about the best thing ever. Malone scoots closer and leans into my ear.
“So, we have this small issue of names. I guess we should’ve been fighting this out a few months back,” he chuckles as he says it.
“Well, we like to do things by the seat of our pants. What are you thinking? I mean—I’ve named three—why don’t you name them. Whatever you want, I’ll agree to.” I smile seeing his face light up.
“Really? Because I have a couple I was thinking would be great if you think you might like them?” He has me laughing as he stutters through his sentences with abandon. “Good. You want to know or me to just announce them?”
I place my hand on his face to whisper softly, “Tell me first.” I follow with my megawatt smile that has him kissing me recklessly. Quietly, Malone’s voice is no more than a breath as his lips brush my ear.
“Wren for him. Harlyn for her. What do you think? I mean, I know we need middle names. What are you wanting for those?”
I can’t help but smile happily as I tell him my thoughts. “How about Wren Brady and Harlyn Sloane. If you don’t mind Wren taking your first name?” His eyes dance with unshed tears. I know this is my forever. In his eyes, by his side.
“I would be honored. Let’s tell them.” He nods toward our growing family. “Hey, everyone. Hadlea and I were just wondering if you would like to know their names.”
The entire room is alive, Elise comes over to Malone’s side, as the rest gather around.
“I’ll take this as a yes. First, Hadlea and I are pleased to say, she has officially accepted my ring and we will be getting married as soon as possible.”
Cheering as loud as they can but it’s just a low rumble because of the twins. Malone kisses my hand the ring rests on before he goes on.
“Now, our son's name is Wren Brady. Our little princess will officially be Harlyn Sloane.”
There’s no stopping the sigh that escapes as Malone speaks while a continuous smile is plastered on his face. There are tears of joy and lots of hugging and kissing as everyone visits, taking in our little miracles.
Not long after we announce their names, the nurses appear to take them to the nursery. Wren and Harlyn need to stay on monitors for a few more days; both are very healthy, although six weeks early. I’ve always been blessed with healthy babies. Malone stays with me long after everyone has left, laying with me, talking.
“So, about this wedding. When, where, and whatever you need, just tell me,” he says while holding me closer, if at all possible. I’m so tired, my eyes begin to flutter. “It’s okay, baby, sleep. You deserve to do what you want after your day. I love you, Hadlea.”
His words are the last I hear for the night. I dream of a beautiful spring day with clear skies, the bluest of blues. Beaches, so sandy they are golden, and an arbor built especially for our day on the beach, surrounded by family.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
One
I pull up to the entrance of the hospital. Montgomery stands at the front. Approaching the doors, I hope to make this short and to the point.
“One. How are you? I’ve been trying to call you,” she says it as though there has never been an issue between us. Where’s this going?
“What? Spit it out or I keep walking.” Glaring at her with all intent of following through with my threat, but her words bring me up short.
“Do you really believe those bastards are yours? Even poor little naïve Chord would never believe it.”
Monty has my blood boiling as I turn my back on her to enter the building. Yet, once again, she brings me up short.
“I have proof. That’s all I’m here for, to protect you. Think of me what you will, but I have it in black and white, One. Here, look.”
She shoves a crumpled piece of paper at me as I stare her down. If I look at this, I betray Hadlea. But what could she have, really? Monty doesn’t give me a chance to answer.
“I’m sure by the time the press gets it, you will see it and understand I wasn’t trying to deceive you.”
I watch her lower her arm and by god if I don’t reach for it. What the fuck am I thinking? Opening the paper, I scan it quickly looking for authenticity. There it is, a different blood type than mine or Hadlea’s. How the hell?
“Where did you get this shit? Why would you do this? To me? Why? Isn’t it enough you’ve fucked my life up for ten years; why do you constantly make trouble? Are you the one fucking with my sites? Are you? Damnit, Montgomery. Why the hell are you even still around? Why?” A low, guttural growl proceeds my words.
She stands there, silent. Finally speaking with enough venom to make a giant falter. “Well, One. I may have done a lot of things but claiming to have your children is not one.” Monty is right but are these papers?
“Where did you get these? How did yo
u get them?” She stands there, sneering at me as if I’m the scum.
“Go find out and come back to me once you do.”
Standing there dumbfounded, I close my eyes to gather my thoughts. It doesn’t help. But one thing is certain, it doesn’t matter. I don’t care who the father is, I never will. I decide not to tell Hadlea.
Walking to her door, I hear her. She’s talking with someone, Delaney. Hadlea’s crying, and my heart hurts. She knows. Hadlea knows I’m not the father of the twins. How did she find out? Did Hadlea ask for the DNA tests?
Pushing through the door, Hadlea sits in the bed, not looking at me. Delaney stands to the side, smirking. What the hell is with this woman? Why is she such a man hater?
“Hadlea, what’s going on?”
Walking to her bedside, I try to take her hand. There’s no way in hell I’m letting anyone in on what I know already. That I know the twins are not mine.
“Hadlea, baby. Take a deep breath and tell me why you’re so upset.” Pleading with her now, I will her to make eye contact. She doesn’t, that’s when Delaney speaks.
“Hadlea, you should tell him. He deserves to know; he deserves the truth.” She seems to be encouraging Hadlea, but I don’t care. I really wish she’d leave.
“Delaney, if you could excuse us. Thank you.” Delaney hesitates but finally walks out.
Turning to Hadlea, I try to pull her into my arms but she won’t come. She sits blankly staring at the bed, inconsolable.
“I need you to talk to me, please.” Turning her head slowly in my direction, I know what Hadlea’s about to do. Spiraling out of control. I begin shaking my head before she says a word; still the words come.
“Malone. One, the twins are not yours, their Cole’s. I would never ask you to be their father or to stand by me, never. We can’t do this, be a family. It wouldn’t be fair to anyone involved. I need you to leave, leave us alone. Don’t come back. I… I don’t want you. I can’t have you. I told you, over and over again. I’m no good, there’s no use.” She moves from my touch, curling up in her defensive position. It’s another slap to my face; I’m shattered.