The Runaway Woman

by Josephine Cox

  ‘But that wasn’t your fault,’ Lucy replied.

  ‘And secondly,’ he continued, ‘while you were in the churchyard, no doubt tending to someone close, who obviously meant a lot to you, I actually took advantage of the time we were there to pay a visit to my own dear wife, who was laid to her rest some long time back. Truth is, I never seem to have enough time to visit, so waiting for you was an unexpected opportunity to make my peace with a very lovely lady who, because of pressure of work, I’m ashamed to say I have sadly neglected of late.’

  In the light of his explanation, and because he was adamant that the fare was still one pound two shillings, Lucy paid what he asked and was very glad to do so.

  When he kindly offered to carry her case to the platform, Lucy thanked him again, and this time she won the argument. ‘I’ll be fine with the suitcase,’ she said firmly. ‘You’ve been very kind, but I do need to be on my own now. I have to get a ticket, find the platform, locate the train and quickly get on board … or I might change my mind and ask you to take me home.’

  For the first time since starting out she was beginning to panic, being close to the stage where turning back might seem the easier option.

  The taxi driver saw how anxious she was. ‘Here, take this. You never know, you might need it.’ Dipping into his top pocket he drew out a small white card, which he handed to Lucy. ‘My number is written there.’ He pointed to it. ‘Remember, if you need a taxi, ring me. It won’t matter how far away you are, or what time of day or night it might be. I’m used to turning out at all hours. So, like I say, if you’re in need of transport, just call me.’

  Lucy thanked him; then she grabbed her case and hurried away.

  It did not take long for her to locate the ticket office, though she was disappointed to find herself at the end of a queue.

  Five minutes passed, and then another five, and then it was fifteen minutes, and though the queue was slowly shrinking, she had to stop herself heading for the street.

  ‘Come on, Lucy!’ she whispered. ‘If you back out now, you may well regret it.’

  Soon enough, the queue diminished and she was next in line. ‘Hello, how can I help you?’ The thin-faced woman behind the ticket desk looked very serious.

  Lucy thought the woman’s voice sounded oddly mechanical, and the deep shadows under her eyes told a story of sleepless nights.

  Aware of the queue building up behind her, Lucy quickly asked her questions. ‘Could you please tell me if there’s a train leaving for Littleton today? And if there is, which platform will it leave from … oh, and what time will it be leaving? I need a one-way ticket, because I’m not sure when I might be returning. And how much does a ticket cost, please?’

  Because she had no idea when she might be able to locate a job of sorts, Lucy reminded herself that she needed to count her pennies.

  ‘Sorry … I forgot to ask, how long is the journey?’ Not being a frequent traveller, she had so many questions. ‘Are there many stops along the way, or does it go right through?’ There! She hoped that was everything.

  As quick as a wink, the answers were delivered in a smart, precise manner. ‘A single ticket will cost you one pound six shillings, and yes, there is a train scheduled to depart for Littleton today from platform eight at twelve forty-five. The train goes straight through to Littleton, and the journey is one hour and fifty minutes.’

  Snatching a discreet breath, the ticket clerk continued, ‘If needed, you will find a small refreshment bar on platform two.’

  ‘Thank you.’ As quickly as she could, Lucy counted the exact money from her purse and pushed it through the flap on the counter.

  Almost immediately a slim, pale hand appeared through the slot in the window and Lucy’s ticket was duly passed over. ‘Good day … have a comfortable journey.’

  That said, the woman leaned forward to address the man behind, which no doubt was Lucy’s cue to get out of the way.

  Glancing at the big round clock high on the wall, she realised that she still had a while to wait and, aware that her ordeal was not yet over, she felt the need for a refreshing cup of tea and maybe a biscuit.

  After spotting the stairs, and seeing the sign above that pointed to platforms one to five, she drew a sigh of relief. That’s where I need to be, she told herself, but having taken the stairs she wondered where the devil the refreshment bar was.

  Beginning to wish she had never embarked on this hazardous adventure, she was rooted to the spot, her mind in chaos and her throat parched for want of a drink. And now she was losing confidence in what the ticket clerk had said.

  Did she say it was on platform ten? Lucy continued to glance about. Or was it platform three?

  Beginning to fall apart completely, she stared up at the big clock, which told her that time was passing, and if she was ever to locate a drink, she’d better get her skates on. ‘Stupid, damned place!’

  Close to the end of her tether, she almost leaped out of her skin when a passing porter spoke to her, ‘You look lost, madam. Can I help you?’

  ‘Thank you, yes.’ Lucy was immensely grateful. ‘I’m looking for the refreshment bar.’

  ‘Ah! Platform two … that way.’ When he gestured to the walkway on her right, she thanked him and scurried away, licking her dry lips in anticipation of a drink at last.

  After she had gone up and down twice and still not found the right platform, Lucy was about to give in when the same porter as before came to her aid.

  ‘You must have passed it.’ He realised she had got herself in a panic. ‘Look! There’s the sign!’ He apologised. ‘It seems our thoughtless management decided to place the newspaper rack in front of it.’

  ‘Well, I must say, that was a silly thing to do.’ Lucy shook her head. ‘I would have thought the passengers were more important than a rack of newspapers!’

  ‘I agree,’ he said, and showed her the way yet again. ‘All right now, are you?’

  ‘Yes, thank you for your help.’ Lucy felt highly embarrassed and ashamed.

  As he went away, the porter chuckled to himself. Poor thing, it was plain to see she was not a regular traveller, which, judging by her useless sense of direction, was just as well!

  Having arrived at the correct platform for the bar, Lucy began to relax. At last she had mastered her nerves, and she now allowed herself to feel just a little proud. This was the first time she had ever travelled by train, let alone on her own. She had her ticket safely tucked away in her pocket. She knew how long the journey might take, what time the train was leaving, and from which platform.

  She knew also that the train did not stop anywhere along the way, which made her feel a great deal easier, because she feared she might have got off at the wrong station, and that would be a catastrophe!

  Astonishingly, she had done all this without trailing like a lost lamb behind the man who, since she’d been a child, had taken charge over her life.

  Settling into her new-found freedom, and feeling more confident than she had felt in many years, Lucy bought a cup of tea in the refreshment bar and sat herself on a bench nearby.

  A moment or so later, she began to chastise herself. It’s a good job that kindly porter helped you, she reminded herself, but if you can’t even find your way round the station, what will you do when you’re let loose amongst strangers a long way from home?

  Even now, with people surging about her, she began to feel the nerves taking a hold again. She gave herself a stern talking to. You’re a grown woman, Lucy Lovejoy! Besides, what do you think might happen to you? Do you think somebody might grab you and run off with you? Chance would be a fine thing, I’m sure! The very idea made her smile.

  As she sipped the piping-hot tea, her thoughts went back to Martin and Paula, and the shocking manner in which she had caught them. Even now, as she remembered it, she felt sick to her stomach.

  Quickly, she thrust them from her mind, and concentrated on where she was going.

  Growing nostalgic, she reminded he
rself of happy childhood days she had enjoyed with her sister and parents. It would be so lovely to see that pretty place again. The thought of sitting on the clifftop and gazing down at the ocean truly calmed her soul.

  After finishing her tea, she decided to go to sit on platform eight and wait for her train.

  First, though, she really should phone Anne. She recalled passing a telephone box earlier, so she decided to go in search of it …

  Soon enough, she was inside the telephone booth and counting out her loose coins. That done, she slipped them into the black box one by one, before quickly dialling the number.

  When Anne answered the phone, Lucy told her, ‘I’m at the railway station, sweetheart. I can’t talk for too long, because I need to get on to platform eight and wait there for the train. So, how is everyone? What are your plans for today, and how is Sam?’

  ‘Slow down, Mum!’ Anne could hardly get a word in. ‘Kathleen told me you’ve decided to go to her aunt’s, and I’m alright with that, Mum, you need a break. I’m not going anywhere special today, but I did promise Dad I would call round later, and do the housework. I might take him fish and chips, as well. Apparently he’s got a lot of building work on and could be working late to catch up. I expect he’ll be tired out and hungry when he gets home.’

  ‘I see!’ Lucy doubted it was work that might tire him out. ‘It’s more like Paula,’ she muttered under her breath, ‘… especially considering their wild appetites for each other.’ Anger flooded her thoughts. No doubt Martin was thrilled to have been left to his own devices … such as beating a path straight to Paula’s door!

  ‘What was that you said?’ Anne asked. ‘Stop mumbling, I can’t hear, what with all that background noise. Anyway, I need to ask you something, and I want you to tell me the truth.’

  Lucy’s heart almost stopped. Had her daughter found out about her father and Paula? ‘What is it, sweetheart?’ she asked nervously.

  ‘Are you and Dad all right?’

  ‘What do you mean?’ Relief flooded through her. Anne obviously didn’t know the truth.

  ‘Well, because just now you asked about me and Sam, but you never asked about Dad … not specifically.’

  ‘Oh, I see! But that was the first thing I asked … whether you were all OK, and that meant everyone. So are you … OK?’

  ‘Yeah, we’re fine, thanks, Mum. Sam seems to be getting on with his plans. Luke is fast asleep, which is usual. And, like I said, Dad is up to his neck, working all hours. But he’s absolutely fine, though I reckon he’s missing you already.’

  ‘Well, that’s nice.’ Lucy tried not to sound sarcastic.

  ‘Are you missing him?’

  ‘Well … yes, I suppose.’ Lucy had to think out her answer. ‘It’s not surprising, though, when you consider that we were childhood sweethearts, and in all those years neither of us has ever been away on our own before; except for that one time your father was away working for six weeks. I don’t mind admitting, I was lost without him.’ That was the truth … back then.

  ‘So you’re missing him now, are you?’ Anne was persistent.

  ‘Well, if I’m honest, I am finding it kind of … strange on my own.’ That was not a lie either, although if he turned up at that very moment, she would walk away from him.

  ‘Well, for what it’s worth, I reckon you should call him tonight.’

  ‘I will. Meantime, will you tell him that I’m all right, I’m on my way, and that I’m really looking forward to this break?’

  ‘OK, Mum, yes. I’ll tell him. But …’ Anne hesitated.

  ‘But what?’ Lucy wondered again if Anne was suspicious.

  ‘Did you and Dad have a falling-out?’

  ‘Whatever makes you say that?’ Lucy asked innocently.

  ‘Did you?’

  ‘Why? Has your father said something?’

  ‘Not really. He just said he was worried about you, that’s all. What with losing both Grandma and Granddad, and so very quickly. I’m sorry, Mum. Look, we all want you to have a really good, clean break. Take as long as you need, and ring me occasionally, won’t you?’

  ‘You know I will, sweetheart. Give Luke a big hug from me, and tell Sam I’m thinking of him.’

  ‘Yes, Mum. And I asked Kathleen if I could have her aunt’s telephone number, just in case I needed to get hold of you, but she said her aunt hasn’t got a telephone. So now I’m worried that I won’t be able to get in touch with you if I need to.’

  Lucy had to think quickly. ‘Oh, yes, of course, sweetheart. Well, as far as I know, Kathleen has a friend she talks to occasionally, and she apparently contacts her aunt through her, but I don’t have her friend’s number, and to be honest, sweetheart, I don’t think we should lumber Kathleen like that. She’s been so very kind. I hate to ask any more of her.’

  ‘So, what am I to do?’ Anne sounded unhappy. ‘What if someone in the family falls ill … how am I to get a hold of you?’

  ‘That won’t be a problem, sweetheart. I’m sure you can send a message via Kathleen. But to be honest, I don’t think there’s any real need for that, especially as I’ll be in touch most nights anyway.’

  ‘Oh, all right then, but don’t feel you have to. Just relax, and enjoy yourself. I promise I won’t contact Kathleen unless it’s absolutely necessary, especially when you’re going to be calling us regularly.’

  Just then, Lucy could hear the baby crying in the background. ‘You go and tend to Luke,’ she told Anne. ‘I love you, sweetheart. A big hug for baby, and Sam and hubby. And you take care of yourself. Oh, and tell your dad not to work too hard.’

  That very difficult throwaway comment was for Anne’s benefit, because, in truth, Lucy cared nothing about him.

  Anne concluded the conversation. ‘Bye for now, Mum. Take care of yourself and, like I say, take as long as you need. And don’t worry, I’ll look after things at this end.’

  After she rang off, Lucy remained in the telephone booth for a moment. So, Martin was out working all hours, was he? She deliberately shut him from her mind.

  Checking her remaining coins, she was greatly relieved to have just enough to call Kathleen.

  ‘Hey!’ Kathleen was thrilled to hear from her. ‘I’m glad you called. I was just thinking about you.’

  ‘I’m still at the station,’ Lucy told her, ‘but I’m heading for the train in a minute.’

  ‘Oh, Lucy, it’s so exciting! I wish I was coming with you.’

  ‘Really? Well, if you get your skates on, you might just make it.’

  ‘It’s too late now, but maybe another time, eh?’

  ‘You bet! Just the two of us … that would be great.’

  ‘OK then. We’ll talk about it when you get back. Now go and get your train, or it’ll go without you. Oh, and don’t forget to call me when you get where you’re going.’

  They said their goodbyes, and Lucy reminded her, ‘You will clear it for me with the boss, won’t you?’

  ‘Of course! I said I would, didn’t I? Besides, she knows about both your parents. I believe that under that skin of steel she really does have a kind heart.’

  Lucy was grateful. ‘Thanks, Kathleen.’

  ‘Aw, don’t you worry about a thing,’ Kathleen assured her. ‘Just take it easy. Try and clear all the bad things out of your mind. Just relax, and get strong in yourself, d’you know what I’m saying?’

  ‘Yes, I do, and thanks.’

  ‘What for?’

  ‘For being the best friend I ever had.’

  ‘Aw, go on with you. You’ll have me bawling in a minute. So, go on! Get on that train, and don’t look back. Have a lovely time, and call me every now and then; or I might start worrying. OK?’

  Lucy’s emotions were all over the place. She felt like going back to spend some time with Kathleen; and then she was so angry she wanted to face Martin and Paula and have it out with them once and for all. And yet she desperately needed to get as far away from here as she possibly could.

  ‘H
ey, Lucy!’ Kathleen’s voice broke her dark thoughts. ‘Are you OK?’

  ‘Oh, I’m sorry, Kathleen.’ On thinking of Martin and the shameful thing he had done, Lucy had actually forgotten that Kathleen was still on the other end of the telephone. ‘I’ll call you as soon as I can … I promise.’

  ‘You’d better! And look after yourself. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.’

  Lucy had to laugh. ‘That leaves me clear to do whatever I like.’

  As always, they laughed together, and then Kathleen told her, ‘Go, Lucy, go! Or you’ll miss your train.’

  Lucy quickly replaced the receiver. The idea of missing the train was unthinkable, so she grabbed her belongings and hurried off to locate platform eight.

  Her mind was now firmly set on travelling back in time, to the delights of that small seaside village. It was such a huge step for her, and the more she thought about it, the more excited she became.

  There was no turning back.

  There were no second thoughts and, so far, no regrets. Except that maybe she should have done it sooner.

  When she made her way down the slope to platform eight, Lucy still found it hard to believe that she was actually leaving home to embark on an adventure that might yet turn out to be the worst thing she had ever done in her entire life.

  She took a moment to think about what she had achieved in her lifetime, and came to the conclusion that, when compared to many others, she had in fact achieved very little.

  So what had spurred her into believing that she could be brave enough to take this gigantic step away from home and family, and everything familiar? She was not a go-getter like Paula; or a madly impulsive soul like Kathleen.

  Her suitcase was packed, her ticket was bought, and she was about to climb onto a train that, because of a childhood memory, would shortly deliver her into the unknown.

  And what made her think that the delightful place she had loved as a child would still be the same now?

  It was crazy that Lucy Lovejoy – a housewife with no ambitions, no adventurous spirit, and no life to speak of apart from being the family keeper – had deliberately planned and executed what could be a dangerous journey into uncharted territory.