Wagonmaster

by Nita Wick

  “You could get him to come back.” Mrs. Simmons washed vegetables in the sink.

  “He’ll come back to sign the papers, but then he’ll go to San Francisco. He goes there every winter.” Addie stared out a kitchen window. The view might have been beautiful if she were in the mood to enjoy it.

  “How long will he be gone? I mean, before he comes back to sign the papers?”

  “I don’t know. I think about two weeks, maybe longer.”

  Mrs. Simmons grabbed a paring knife and began slicing the carrots and potatoes. “Good. You’ve got two weeks to figure out how to make him realize he doesn’t want to live without you.”

  Addie bit her lip. “How do I do that?”

  The older woman smiled and winked at her. “I reckon a woman who’s smart enough to become a doctor is more than a match for a man foolish enough to even think about walkin’ away from the woman he loves. You’ll come up with somethin’.”

  * * * *

  The pleasant supper ended too soon. Addie stood near the front door with Joshua and his cook.

  Jimmy donned his hat and coat. “Thanks again, Addie. That was the best meal I’ve had in ages.”

  “Thank you for coming, Jimmy. I’m going to miss you.” On impulse, Addie grasped the man around his waist and gave him a quick hug.

  He laughed. “Ah, shucks. I’m gonna miss you, too, little lady. Maybe if I come back this way I could wrangle another supper invite.”

  Addie nodded. “Any time. You’re always welcome here.”

  Jimmy gave a nod toward Joshua. “I reckon I’ll see you tomorrow, boss.”

  Joshua looked at Addie as he answered him. “Tell the rest we leave in the mornin’.”

  Her breath caught, and her composure faltered, but she didn’t speak. She couldn’t.

  Jimmy answered, “Right, boss. I’ll tell ’em. The sooner we leave, the sooner you can get back.”

  Addie watched Joshua for his reaction. As usual, she couldn’t imagine what he might be thinking. His thoughts and emotions hid behind a calm and unreadable expression.

  She closed the door behind Jimmy and turned back to Joshua. “Can you stay for a while?”

  He shook his head. “I’d better go.”

  Addie did her best to hide her disappointment. Inside, her heart cracked, and her stomach churned. “I understand.”

  He stepped closer to her. “You’re going to be all right, Addie. I was worried about you yesterday. Today at lunch I still wasn’t convinced.” His fingers stroked her arm. “But tonight, I saw the Addie I know.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I know you’re mourning your father. You’re sad, but you’ll recover. Tonight, I saw a glimpse of the woman who made fried pies for me before. I saw the woman who enjoys Jimmy’s company when others are leery of him.” He touched her cheek. “She’s still here.”

  Addie turned her face to place a kiss in his palm. “I’m going to miss you.”

  His arms encircled her. “No, you won’t. You’ll be too busy learnin’ your way around the ranch. This is a big spread. And you’ve got the general store too.”

  She laid her head against his chest. “I don’t know anything about ranching or business.”

  “You’ll learn. When I get back, you’ll have everything well in hand.”

  “How long do you think you’ll be gone?”

  “About two weeks, I think.” He kissed the top of her head.

  Addie lifted her face to stare into his warm brown eyes. “Be careful.”

  “I will.” Joshua lowered his head and brushed her lips with his own, denying her the kind of kiss she craved. He released her, pulled on his coat and gloves, and strode the few steps to the door. “Take care of yourself, darlin’.”

  The door closed behind him, and Addie’s heart constricted. Fat, hot tears rolled down her cheeks. She reminded herself he’d be back in two weeks. A sob shook her. He’d come back, sign the divorce agreement, and she’d lose him forever.

  * * * *

  The days passed slowly for Addie, but she dreaded the nights even more. Every evening she’d crawl into her big, soft bed and stare at the ceiling. Tossing and turning, she’d think of her father and Joshua. She pondered her father’s ledgers and notes. They might as well have been written in German. Nothing made sense.

  After a couple of hours, she’d climb out of bed and settle in the chair by the fire. Sleep escaped her there, too, but at least she had the extra warmth. Sometimes she’d doze long enough for dreams to haunt the darkness. Finding herself lost and alone, fear and sorrow plagued her. At times, she ran in circles, unable to find her way. Dark shadows threatened, and rain left her chilled to the bone. Other times she pounded on the locked door of a damp, cold cellar, begging to be released.

  She left the chair each day before the sun rose to return to her father’s study. Just after sunrise, a daily argument began with Mrs. Simmons over Addie’s refusal to eat breakfast. A similar exchange ensued every day at lunchtime. Once or twice over the last week she’d gone into town. She’d told Mrs. Simmons she’d eaten with her Uncle Rick at the restaurant. She hadn’t, of course. Food held no appeal. Each night at supper, she’d force herself to eat a few bites. The soup she’d eaten last night settled without making her nauseous. Perhaps she’d ask Mrs. Simmons for soup again tonight.

  Addie stared at the ledgers for over an hour. When the pounding in her temples became too much to bear, she closed the books and fetched a headache powder. She found the inventory audits and previous order history for the general store far less confusing. After reading over them for the fifth time this week, Addie realized the short list of medicinal supplies for the store needed revision and expansion.

  She requested the carriage be readied and spoke to Mrs. Simmons about the soup. The housekeeper protested Addie’s refusal of lunch again today, but Addie ignored her. On the ride into town, Addie considered the need to speak to Dr. Fletcher about the medicines. He’d called on her twice, once with her uncle, once alone. To her utmost regret and irritation, the young man made it clear he intended to court her. She should avoid him, but ordering supplies the doctor may keep well stocked in his office would be a waste.

  Addie suppressed a groan. She stopped the buggy in front of the doctor’s house and office. The possibility of making a big mistake with the store convinced her she needed to speak to him. Bracing herself, she climbed from the carriage and strode to the door of the two-story building. Similar to all the others on the main street of Baker City, the wooden structure included the dangling tile over the front door proclaiming it the office of Jonathan Fletcher, Medical Doctor.

  She bit her lip and twisted the handle. A bell jangled above her head.

  “Coming,” a disembodied voice called from another room.

  Addie surveyed the waiting room. Two wooden benches with blue pillow cushions lined the walls. A painting of a mountain range hung above them. A small, round table in the corner held an oil lamp, and a blue, oval rug covered the floor in front of the benches. The rest of the room remained undecorated, including the front windows. No curtains or shades hung over the paned glass.

  “Dr. Jennings?”

  Addie jumped at the sound of Dr. Fletcher’s voice. “Hello, Dr. Fletcher. I wonder if you have a moment to speak to me.”

  “Of course.” He grasped both of her hands in greeting and brought one to his lips. “Are you ill?”

  Grateful for her gloves, Addie pulled her hands away. “Oh, no. I’m fine. I just—”

  “I beg your pardon, but you don’t look fine.” His concerned expression did little to soften his words. “You’ve lost weight, you’re pale, and there are deep shadows beneath your eyes.”

  Addie bit her tongue to stop a tart reply. “Thank you for your concern, Doctor. I will admit to a loss of appetite and difficulty falling asleep. Those are common symptoms caused by melancholy over the loss of a loved one. I am not ill.” She hurried to change the subject. “I needed to speak to you about med
ical supplies.”

  “Supplies? Do you need medicine?”

  “No, no. I was checking the inventory at the store and noticed a lack of common remedies, bandages, splints…that sort of thing.”

  “Oh. I keep a small supply here.” He waved at one of the benches. “Please, have a seat.” He waited until she’d complied. “I order them from a company in San Francisco.”

  “I see. Do you feel you are able to keep sufficient supplies for all of Baker City? I’d be happy to stock extra quantities at the store.”

  “I’ve never had a shortage of anything.” He paused, his brows drawing together. “Dr. Jennings, why are you worrying over supply orders at the store? Does the clerk not handle that for you?”

  “Well, yes. He prepares the orders. I’m simply learning how to manage the store and its finances. I’m looking for ways to improve, if possible.”

  He sighed. “No wonder you look so tired. You’ve a clerk and your solicitor who can look after things for you. Your father trusted them. Let them handle things. A woman shouldn’t have to worry over finances and business.”

  Addie stared at her gloved hands. She couldn’t look him in the eye or he would see the anger boiling behind her calm demeanor. “What exactly should a woman worry over, Doctor?”

  He placed his hands over hers. “A woman should concern herself with her husband and children.”

  Addie lifted her chin and narrowed her eyes. “And if she doesn’t have a husband and children?”

  One hand rose to brush a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “You could have a husband, Addie. Marry me.”

  Shock stole her anger. “Dr. Fletcher—”

  “Please call me Jonathan.”

  Addie stood. “I’m sorry if I’ve given you the wrong impression.”

  He rose and grasped her shoulders. “Addie, think of all we have in common. We are perfect for each other. You could help me with the practice until we have a family. I’d be a good husband.”

  “I…I’m sure you would, but….” Addie searched for a way to discourage his interest. “But surely you don’t want a woman who….” How should she phrase it? “Did Uncle Rick tell you that he’s filed a request for a divorce?”

  His eyes widened. “Divorce? Not an annulment?”

  “Divorce.” She nodded firmly. “I’m sure you understand why one would be required.”

  A muscle worked in his jaw. “I don’t care. I—”

  “You do care. You’re angry. Your face is flushed.” She pointed at his hands. “And your fists are tight.”

  “Yes, I’m angry. I’d like to kill Reynolds for using you like that, but—”

  “He didn’t use me.”

  Jonathan stared at her. “No?”

  “Dr. Fletcher, I can’t marry you. It wouldn’t be fair. Not to you.”

  He sucked in a breath and blew it out in a whoosh. “You’re in love with him.”

  Addie didn’t argue. “I think I’d better go.”

  He grasped her elbow. “Wait. Addie, he doesn’t want you, but I do. You’ll learn to love me. I’ll be good to you.” Without warning, he caught her face in his hands and covered her mouth with his lips.

  Addie stood frozen, unable to move or respond. Warm lips pressed against hers, but they did nothing to move her. No butterflies filled her stomach. Her pulse remained calm, and her heart didn’t skip a beat. He did not inspire the fire that filled her veins when Joshua kissed her. She felt—nothing.

  He lifted his head. Darkened blue eyes met her gaze. “Say yes, Addie.”

  She stepped back, shaking her head. “I’m sorry, Dr. Fletcher. I can’t marry you. I don’t want to marry anyone right now. Please understand. It’s not you.”

  “I see.” Disappointment colored his features. “Perhaps you’ll change your mind in a few months. You’ve lost your father and need time to adjust to your new life. I understand.”

  Addie nodded and headed for the door. Pulling it open, she stepped through and looked over her shoulder. “Don’t wait for me,” she warned. “I don’t know if I’ll ever adjust.”

  She raced to the carriage and almost forgot to release the brake in her in rush to leave. By the time she reached the entrance to the ranch, tears stained the front of her coat. How could she live without Joshua? Why didn’t he want her? She’d do anything for him, follow him anywhere. She’d…. Her breath caught. That’s it. She’d go with him to San Francisco. She’d stay with him for as long as he’d let her. Maybe Mrs. Simmons was right. With more time, she might be able to convince him to let her stay with him.

  * * * *

  Ten days had passed. Ten long days. Josh set the tin plate down with a sigh.

  “Yeah. I miss her too.”

  He looked over at Jimmy. “What?”

  “Your missus. Things just ain’t the same without her ’round.”

  “I didn’t say I missed her.”

  Jimmy shook his head. “Didn’t need to. Everybody on this train knows you ain’t thought ’bout nothin’ but your lady since we left Baker City.”

  He couldn’t deny it. Thoughts of Addie always plagued him. Is she all right? What was she doing now? And who was she doing it with? Josh chose a different form of denial. “She ain’t my lady.”

  Jimmy’s chuckle sent a fog into the cold air. “Whether you know it or not, that woman is yours heart and soul.”

  “Nah. She’s too good for the likes of me. I don’t deserve her.”

  “Well, that’s true enough. But I ain’t never met a man good enough for a woman like your Addie.”

  “She deserves a man who can give her silks and pearls.”

  “Addie don’t need none of that. She’s happy with just a fishin’ pole. ’Sides, her pa left her all the money she could ever spend.”

  Josh nodded. “Yeah, but she needs a doctor or lawyer, a man who’s made somethin’ of himself.”

  Jimmy stood, his old knees popping in protest. “Ain’t no man ever made more of himself than you, boss. You made yourself Addie’s husband.”

  Josh laughed. “Yeah, that’s somethin’.”

  “Sure is. Some men wouldn’t know it, though. Too many of ’em are too stupid to realize how rare a woman she is. Fact is, a lot of men would only be interested in the money her pa left her. It’s a good thing she’s already married. Ain’t no tellin’ what kind of men would be after now if she weren’t. Least you know she’s safe from the wolves till you get back.” The old cook gathered up the plates and dumped them into a bucket. “Don’t worry ’bout waitin’ for me. After we deliver Cooper and Fleming tomorrow, I’m gonna rest a day or two. This is my last trip. I’m getting too old for the trail. Time to find a place to settle down. Baker City seems nice. You go on back without me. Bet you can be there in two or three days. Addie needs you.” He tipped his hat. “Night, boss.”

  Josh nodded, watching while the cook climbed into the wagon. He’d known she’d have suitors, but he hadn’t considered all the greedy, no-good dogs who’d be sniffing around Addie’s skirts. Sure, the doctor had shown an interest right away. But what of the other men of Baker City? Could Foster protect her?

  Maybe Jimmy was right. Maybe even the doctor wasn’t good enough for Addie. And she could end up with a man who didn’t love her. If nothing else, he could give her that. God, he loved that woman. It may have taken over a week without her before he’d admit it. But he loved her. Now there was only one question: did she still want a divorce?

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Josh emerged from the hotel bathed and clean-shaven. The dust of the trail was washed away only to be replaced by a mixture of unfamiliar emotions. Doubt nudged the edges of his mind, but the prospect of seeing Addie held the gloom at bay. Would she be happy to see him? Or would she simply give him a quill to sign the divorce agreement?

  “Reynolds, wait.”

  Looking over his shoulder, Josh groaned as he saw Dr. Fletcher. It was hard to be civil to the man. Just the thought of Addie in Fletcher’s arms made him want to
shoot someone. He slowed his pace and waited for the doctor to catch up to him.

  “I need a word with you.” Fletcher made no attempt to greet Josh with the usual handshake. It was just as well.

  “What is it, Doctor?”

  “I asked Adelaide to marry me.”

  The words twisted Josh’s gut and pierced his heart. He was too late. He’d known this would happen. Fletcher was the kind of man Addie deserved. “Congratulations.”

  The doctor scowled, shaking his head. “No need for that. She turned me down. Said it wouldn’t be fair to me.”

  Relief washed over him first, followed quickly by surprise and confusion. “She said no? Why?”

  The man’s jaw clenched. “Damn it, Reynolds. You know why.”

  “Not sure what you mean.” Josh’s throat tightened. “I only returned this mornin’. Has the circuit judge sent the approval?” Lord, he hoped not. He needed a little more time. Time to change her mind.

  “A divorce won’t set her free, and you know it, Reynolds. Do the right thing. Let her go.”

  Josh stared at Fletcher. What the hell was the man talking about?

  “You need to be honest with her. Tell her you don’t want her. Tell her you don’t love her, damn it.”

  Josh frowned. Could he lie to her like that? “Why?”

  He threw his arms in the air. “She won’t marry me until she accepts the fact that the two of you have no future together.”

  “The two of us?” Hope filled him, but he wouldn’t let Fletcher know it. “I’m afraid you’ve got it all wrong. If she doesn’t want to marry you, it’s got nothin’ to do with me. She wants a divorce.”

  Fletcher’s eyes widened, disbelief etched in his features. “Good God. You’re an imbecile, Reynolds. A complete and utter idiot.”

  Josh wanted to smash his fist into the good doctor’s nose, but that would probably only get him a night in jail.

  Fletcher wiped his hand across his face. “Look, whether you know it or not, Adelaide is in love with you.”

  Josh struggled to hide his surprise. Joy threatened to lift the corners of his mouth. He cleared his throat. “I believe you’re mistaken. Addie is not in love with me. I understand why you might be jealous, but—”