Virgin's Lust

by Kayla C. Oliver

  And the final text.

  If I can’t have you, no one can.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Dakin

  She’s upset. I can see it in the way she tenses up. Goose bumps pepper her skin and I want to pull her into my arms and promise her she’ll be alright. Even though her comment about how she’d thought I was the kind of guy who’d stand by while someone raped her stings, I’m not going to be petty and deny her comfort while she’s clearly trembling with emotion.

  “Are you okay?” I ask.

  She looks up at me as if stunned I’m here and she’s not alone. There’s an instant denial in her features, but I know she’s terrified. It’s in her eyes. It’s in the pout on her pretty lips. It’s there in every bit of body language.

  So I move beyond words and pull her into a hug. She clings to me like I’m the only solid thing in her crumbling world. She’s warm and sweet, soft and delicate, yet stronger than I think anyone in her life has ever given her credit for.

  Whatever happens to her in life, I’m sure she’ll give better than she gets.

  There’s no need to push her right now. When she wants to talk, she will. But I have no doubt about what’s troubling her. Jackson is an asshole. And like an addiction, he’ll chip away at her will to be without him. He’ll start sweet, then shift to blaming her for everything, then into making her feel bad. From there, he’ll devolve into light threats and you made me this way bullshit. Finally, he’ll start to really threaten her.

  And I have no doubt that overnight she got to sample every step along the way.

  Unless it all just hit her at once. If he sent them and her phone was totally dead, which I bet it was, she’ll have gotten all the stages in a flood of sweet to bitter hatred.

  I get my answer as her shoulders begin to shake. I feel her tears begin to wet my shirt and rage boils up in me. That asshole is lucky I’m here with her right now. If I wasn’t, he’d be begging me not to kill him right now.

  And I’d be ignoring his request.

  “What did I do?” she whimpers, sniffing as if to keep from crying.

  “Wrong place at the wrong time,” I tell her. It’s true. Jackson is a cancer, and blaming herself is not going to help her in any way. She won’t find answers by turning within for them. “He’s the problem, not you,” I assure her, but she’s resisting me at every turn.

  “How do you know that? I’m the prude, the ice queen. I was the problem.”

  I pull her back a bit and look into her eyes with every ounce of intensity I can muster. “You were the reason he’s been a total loser to every girl he’s dated?” I ask.

  That makes her pause.

  But the tears in her eyes are starting to well up higher.

  “You can’t blame yourself. You weren’t the issue here. He’s a garbage human being,” I tell her, needing her to see the bigger picture here.

  And she nods. “Okay,” she whispers.

  “Stay here,” I say softly. Her eyebrows knit together and I know she’s confused. “He won’t dare come here. You’ll be safe,” I elaborate.

  “I thought he’d be in jail,” she whispers.

  “He should be. There are warrants,” I say, internally cursing my guys for their role in his freedom. Still, I don’t know exactly what happened, so maybe they aren’t to blame. “Somehow he gave people the slip and he’s on the run. They’ll catch him,” I’m quick to assure her. “But while he’s out, you’re welcome to stay here, with me.” She’ll be safe with me. I’d die before letting him hurt her.

  She smiles, a genuine, warm, sweet smile that lights up my very soul. “Thank you,” she whispers, a new warmth in her eyes.

  But I feel bad. I’d had people ready to tail her, to follow her, to watch out for her. What would she think if I told her that? Would she treat me like some kind of creepy freak who overstepped his boundaries? Because I had. I know I did. I had no right to have anyone do anything like that. Do good intentions outweigh breaking social norms?

  Maybe it’s better not to tell her.

  For now, I’ll let her go on believing that my only plan is to keep her here where she’d be safe. And I’m not sorry. Not at all. I don’t put it past Jackson to do something really, really stupid.

  The guy is an idiot.

  “Are you sure I wouldn’t be imposing?” she asks, and I’m quick to tell her she wouldn’t be.

  “Far from it,” I say, “I rather like your company.”

  The smile that had faded from her lips returns. “I won’t tell anyone.”

  “I appreciate that,” I say, playing along. And I realize I like her humor, her wit, how quick she is to tease me and her playful nature. Instead of feeling like I need to push her out the door and change the locks, I find more and more that I don’t want her to go.

  Not that I’d tell her that. Or anyone else for that matter.

  “Now,” she says, taking a step back from me. “Where were we?” she asks, and I try not to cringe. She was telling me how she thought I would stand by while someone raped her.

  “Oh!” she says as if she suddenly remembers. “I was telling you how wrong I was about you.” Once more, she leans into me, pressing that delicious body up against me in a way that makes my cock rock hard and sends my heart thumping in my chest.

  Her lips meet mine in a quick kiss.

  My hands find her ass and grip the perfect, rounded, soft flesh. Holding her tight to me, I resist the urge to pick her up. While I’m certain she’d wrap her legs around me, I’m painfully aware she’s not wearing panties, as she was so quick to let me know after she’d changed.

  It’s going to take everything I have not to push her down on the bed and take her virginity right now. But I’ve got plans for that. Plans that’ll make sure her first time is unforgettable.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Camille

  The kiss is incredible. Dakin tilts his head a fraction of an inch between kisses as if looking for the perfect angle. But all of them feel perfect to me. He’s so damn sexy. Even with all the fear, all the worry, all the self-doubt crowding and nagging at my brain, I can’t help but feel totally immersed in him.

  It’s a welcome distraction.

  With his hands on my ass, I feel his hardness pressing into my belly, and I want to feel more. I want to feel his skin on mine, his cock pressed to the sensitive vee between my thighs. I want to feel everything.

  His lips leave mine to sample my chin, the line of my jaw, the curve of my cheek and ear. Every spot he touches is warm, tingling, a pressure point of pleasure even as the rough stubble of his cheeks burns against my skin.

  As he gently takes the skin below my ear between his teeth, I have to tell him the truth. My hips tilt into him as I sling to his shoulders like he’s the only safe place on a rough sea.

  “I touched myself last night,” I whisper, my words sounding naughty to the extreme. My heart thunders in my chest and I struggle to draw in a deep breath. “I was imagining you.” I want to tell him what I was imagining him doing.

  “I know.”

  Those two words from his lips send my whole body into state of total shock. Nerve endings blaze white-hot and a combustion of icy fire in my chest leaves me feeling like I’m both on fire and frozen all at once.

  His lips leave my skin and his teeth scrape the damp skin. A shiver rolls through me and I feel his thigh part my legs. His hands pull me forward a bit and the pressure focused on my clit forces a gasp out of me. It’s pleasure, exciting and so damn naughty I can hardly breathe.

  He’s treating me like a woman, not some delicate damned terrified virgin.

  “Did you watch?” I ask, feeling deliciously wicked that he’d seen me touching myself. Did he touch himself too?

  “No.” He’s gruff, all power and spice, and I want every bit of him. The rich, earthy scent of his skin, the heat of his cologne, the freshness of his laundry detergent… it’s all mouthwateringly him.

  “I wish you had,” I whisper, meaning every
word. Hell, I wish he’d have joined.

  “What did you want me to do to you?” he asks, and everything in me cries out. His lips tease the sensitive skin of the lobe of my ear and I tremble as my belly coils tight.

  “I wanted you to taste my pussy,” I whisper, not a shy bone in my body. And I feel him stiffen. His cock pulses against my belly and I realize he’s turned on by the idea of licking me. “I want to feel your tongue on me, your lips; I want to come while you touch me.”

  Suddenly, he moves me back. I cry out as the world shifts and I find myself on my back on the bed. Out of the skylight, I see a beautiful blue sky, but I’m much more interested in Dakin. Lifting my head, I see him drop to his knees at the end of the bed.

  His hands grab my ass and suddenly, I know.

  He hauls me closer and his lips touch the skin just above my pubic bone. The contact is warm, soft, and wonderful.

  I melt as he kisses closer to the heart of me. But I’m not going to sit idly by. I reach down and part the skin to show him the part I really want his lips on: my clit. With a quiet growl, he’s on me, his lips sealing around my clit as he sucks it gently into his mouth.

  The world combusts in pleasure and sensation. My head falls back and my body goes limp. “Just like that,” I whisper, needing him to know how he’s destroying me.

  An agreeable hum emanates from him and the vibration makes my belly jolt in pleasure and surprise.

  “Oh my god,” I whisper, the three words becoming one as my hands find the sides of his head and hold him captive. His tongue teases the bundle of nerves and I feel faint.

  “That’s so good,” I tell him as his tongue tastes and teases. It’s better than I thought it would be, and part of me is still in shocked denial that Dakin Dark is going down on me right now.

  Again, he hums a positive response and the sensation sends shockwaves of pleasure bolting through every inch of my body. It’s impossible, incredibly sexy, too much to even put words to. But my body has its own response and I’m there at the edge of undeniable pleasure. I’m teetering on the edge of everything Dakin is doing to me.

  “I’m so close,” I whimper as my hips struggle to buck up into him. But he’s holding me hostage and I feel him easing off just a bit, as if to torture.

  “Please, please, please,” I pant, needing him to finish me. The tightness in my belly is almost too much to stand, and I want more.

  A haze of desperation settles in on my senses and I hold his head, my hips still struggling to force him to let me come. But he’s holding firm, drawing out the torture, and it only increases the need I feel.

  Suddenly, everything implodes and I hear the whimper leave my lips like I’m dying. And maybe I am. Or part of me is. The part of me who’d never felt this before, who’d never been brought to orgasm by someone else.

  My pussy clenches so hard it hurts and his tongue eases up and he hums like he’s talking me down from a ledge. The ripples of pleasure steal the air from my lungs and I’m all volume and mews of pleasure as my body struggles to take in all the excitement.

  It’s more intense than any orgasm I’ve given myself, and it’s stronger than I’d ever thought possible. And at the heart of it all: Dakin.

  His blue eyes meet mine and the whole world stops.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Dakin

  Fuck, she’s sexy as hell when she comes.

  Reality crashes down as the pleasure in her eyes begins to fade and she drops back to melt into the bed.

  Fuck.

  I shouldn’t have done that.

  Damn it.

  I back off, struggling at the very real – and intense – need pulsing though me. But she’s not done with me. She lifts her head, her sexy eyes dreamy as she opens her arms to me.

  “Come here,” she says, a new warmth in her voice.

  And I do. I crawl onto the bed and let her pull me in close. Her lips meet mine despite her wet clinging to my chin and her tongue lazily meets mine.

  “I want you,” she whispers when I don’t respond to her kiss. Her eyes open and meet mine, and I’m startled by the depth of heat I see there. And when her tongue flicks out and touches my lip, I feel a sudden heat in my gut. Fuck, I want her too. But I know who I am. What I am. I don’t want to hurt her.

  “I use women, Camille.” My words are harsh. I need to put distance between us. And fast. I know the look in her eyes. She’s willing to forgive me for any wrong I might commit. Or might have already committed. Like invading her personal life. Like controlling a situation to get the outcome I wanted.

  Her eyes narrow, as if she’s trying to figure out why I’m telling her this. “Nobody is perfect, Dakin.” Her words are sweet, her tone clear and gentle. Forgiving.

  “I’ll only use you too,” I say, but she shakes her head.

  “You can’t use the willing,” she teases, her voice lighthearted as she continues to stare me directly in the eyes. “Why are you doing this?” she asks, her brows meeting over a wrinkle in her forehead. I want to kiss the spot, but I resist the urge.

  But I know what I’m doing. I’m pushing her away. I’m helping her. I’m saving her from the monster I really am. I have to protect her from myself.

  No matter how much I’ll hate myself for it later.

  “Women don’t stay the night,” I say, and there’s flash of hurt in her eyes. “The only reason you did was because I didn’t want to be responsible for a drunk minor.”

  “I’m not a minor,” she says, her expression suddenly more wary. Good. She’s starting to be on edge. That’s what I needed.

  And I ignore her response. “I had someone ready to follow you if you left today.” It sounds like a threat, and I know my true intentions are in there, but maybe she won’t see them. Maybe she’ll see me for the creep others have thought me to be.

  “Why?” The simple question breaks my heart. She wants to believe I’m a good person. She wants me to be the good guy in this story. But for her sake, I can’t be.

  “I don’t respect boundaries,” I tell her. It’s true. I’m not a good guy for her. And sure, I’ll admit I’m scared. I don’t want the responsibly of the pain she’s going to feel when she realizes that I’ve betrayed her. I want her to be on guard against me.

  “Some boundaries are stupid,” she says, still trying in vain to talk around me. But she’s chipping around the edges.

  “I don’t give a fuck if what I’m doing is okay or not.” That’s it. That’s the whole root of the issue. I’m selfish. I don’t give a fuck how other people feel. I don’t care if people get hurt. I just need to be able to sleep at the end of the night.

  And I generally do.

  The girls I sleep with know what they’re getting into, who I am. I don’t lie or trick them. But Camille, she’s different. She’s vulnerable. She’s a virgin who doesn’t understand that the first time will have an effect on her psyche. And I can’t be the one who she attaches to because of it.

  “Bullshit.” Her word is soft, yet there’s steel behind it. “If that was true,” she says, her eyes slashing back and forth between mine, “you’d have fucked me last night.”

  “I wasn’t interested,” I growl, and instantly the hurt in her eyes sends agony like a bullet through my heart. “You were drunk and disgusting.”

  Her lips part a little and shock crosses those beautiful features. But the shock totally gives way to hurt.

  “You’re lying,” she whispers, but I shake my head. There’s no going back. I’m going to push her away and I’m going to make sure she won’t come back.

  Still, the hurt clears and her fingers reach out to touch my cheek. “You’re not a monster,” she says, her tone full of wonder as if she’s realizing it for the first time herself. “But you’ve done a great job of convincing people.” Her eyes meet mine and her lips take on a little pout.

  But she’s wrong. Just because she’s seen a different side of me than other people have doesn’t mean she’s totally right. Just because I’m no
t the same with her doesn’t change who I really am at my core.

  She lifts her head and her lips touch mine. The kiss is tender, sweet, and as much as I want to push her away, I just can’t bring myself to do it. With every touch she’s undoing knots I’ve tied for many years. She’s refusing to believe me; to listen to the things she doesn’t want to hear.

  I push her away, but she’s playful and tries to come back up even as I keep my hand on her chest and hold her down. “You’re wrong about me,” I tell her, studying her eyes as the humor leaves them.

  And as she struggles, I see her hope beginning to fade a bit too. I let her go and stand up, needing to put some distance between us.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Camille

  Dakin holding me down was the hottest thing I’ve ever experienced in my life, but while he’s over there across the room like I’m some mutant he needs to be far away from, there’s still an undeniable draw between us.

  Something between us crackles and pops, and I’m not about to ignore it.

  “You said you had someone ready to follow me,” I say, seeing how he’s staring me down. “Was it because you knew that Jackson was out there?” I mean, come on. He’s doing it to protect me. How can he try to use it as a reason he’s a bad guy?

  It’s even clear that he’d keep it from me to keep me from stressing out about all if it.

  And, when he doesn’t respond, I suddenly get it. He’s not pushing me away just for the sake of it, he feels guilty. I get to my feet and walk over to him with all the composure I can muster. He stays frozen in place and I pull him into a hug.

  “I wish you’d trusted me enough to tell me,” I whisper, needing him to know I’m not blaming him. I’m not even mad. I wish he’d handle this with more grace, but I get that he’s human too. He’s allowed to screw up. “But I understand why you didn’t.”

  He didn’t do it to hurt me. He did it out of a twisted idea of protecting me. As for the rest of his need to push me away, I assume it’s all part of the same issue. He wants to push me away. Likely to protect me.