Forgotten Soldiers

by Joshua P. Simon

  Zadok ran over to my bag, pulled free the pot and also a skin of water. He went back to peeling the potatoes, putting the cleaned ones in the pot after a quick rinse with the water.

  “Any luck?” Myra asked while stacking firewood.

  “Hmm?”

  “With getting a fresh supper.”

  “Oh. Yes.” I went back over to my kills, and grabbed them. “Not too bad for such a short amount of time.”

  Zadok looked up. “Wow, two rabbits and a squirrel!”

  Myra walked over with her hand out. I stared at it with a confused look.

  “I can help you clean them,” she said.

  “Oh.” I gave her one of the rabbits. We each walked just outside of the clearing to skin and gut them. I kept glancing at her, impressed with how comfortable she seemed with the task. We finished at roughly the same time, though I’ll admit, she cleaned hers better than mine.

  Apparently, they had been busier than I realized during the short amount of time I was setting traps. Besides gathering more wood, Myra had anticipated me returning with something and made a couple of spits to hang the rabbits on. She grabbed mine and set them both over the flames to cook while I cleaned the squirrel. By the time I propped up the squirrel next to the rabbits, Zadok had the potatoes simmering.

  While our supper cooked, I closed in the sides of the lean-to as a cool breeze flitted through the trees. Myra said nothing while I worked, but Zadok talked almost constantly. To be honest, I had trouble following his seemingly random thoughts. However, I dared not ask him to stop. The sound of his voice was enough to keep the thoughts of Lasha away.

  Once finished, I noticed Myra had retreated inside the shelter. Huddled closer to Zadok, she shivered. Though her clothes were in better shape than Zadok’s, neither was fit for spending nights out in the elements. I grabbed a blanket from my bag, leaned in, and draped it over them.

  Zadok paused his latest story long enough to smile. Myra clutched at the blanket and pulled it around them without a word.

  I checked the food. It smelled great. If it tasted half as good, I’d consider our first meal as a family again a success. At least from a food perspective.

  The rabbits and potatoes both appeared done. The squirrel was done twice over. I gave each of the kids a rabbit while I took the blackened rodent. Zadok dove into his. He pulled away quickly, grimacing at the sizzling meat, then went right back in. Juices dripped from his chin.

  “Slow down,” said Myra. “No one’s going to take it from you.”

  That gave him pause, and he slowed his attack considerably.

  Myra tried to be more subdued in her approach, but even she burned herself a couple times with impatience.

  I nibbled at my squirrel, intent on letting the thing cool first. It was dry and overdone, but at least well-seasoned. I followed it with a few of the warm potatoes, giving Zadok and Myra the rest just as they finished their rabbits, sucking the last bit of meat off the bones. They went at the potatoes with more restraint.

  Barely.

  Both wore a satisfied look when finished.

  With a full belly, Zadok was talking again, though this time he asked questions about my life in the army. I did my best to focus on stories about lighter times in camp rather than the hell on the battlefield.

  “. . . I figured out what Hamath had planned pretty quickly. Especially when I realized Ira was involved. Neither could ever bluff me. Dekar is Ira’s brother. He was different. The man could remain completely stone-faced while telling the most outrageous lie. Anyway, once I realized they were up to something, I brought your aunt in to figure out a way to get them first. We decided to feel Dekar out to see if he knew anything. We figured he’d likely go along with anything that might make one of Ira’s plans fall apart. The three of us got to work.”

  I paused for a moment to make sure I hadn’t lost my audience. Zadok seemed genuinely interested, leaning forward with elbows on knees. Myra didn’t look as interested as her brother, but she also didn’t appear annoyed by my story. That was good enough for me.

  “We first rigged the watch schedule, then stuffed our bedrolls, getting Ava to put a glamour over mine so it looked real. Right when the rest of my unit was coming to make their move we pounced on them from behind.” I started chuckling as I thought about it. “Ava did something to make them move real slow. Then I doused everyone with honey. Dekar followed, with these containers of ants we gathered from a nearby mound. Ava waited a few seconds and then removed the spell. They both hollered at the top of their lungs while jumping into this muddy river we had camped beside.”

  I was really laughing now as I recalled the looks on their faces when they came back, covered in tiny, red welts. “Man, that had to be the angriest I’d ever seen Hamath. But he got over it eventually.”

  Zadok chuckled at the story, but not as hard as I did. I guess there was something to be said for being there. Plus, I really wasn’t as good a storyteller as others in my unit. Hamath especially. I told a few more tales until he interrupted.

  “Was Hamath your best friend?”

  “Yeah. We were all close. However certain people gravitated toward others over time. Your aunt and I always stayed close.”

  He frowned. “Why didn’t Aunt Ava come back with you? Did she not want to see us?”

  I shook my head. “It wasn’t that. She had an opportunity that was hard to pass up. She did want to see you both, but . . .” I started to say something more, but stopped.

  “But what?” asked Myra. It was the first time she’d said anything since before dinner. I had wondered if she had even been listening.

  “Well, I hate to say it, but your aunt doesn’t have the best memories of Denu Creek. She got picked on by Jareb and a few others growing up. Then one day her powers manifested when she was trying to protect both of us. After that, people were scared of her. She always felt like an outsider.”

  Myra grunted. “I know how she feels.”

  “Oh?”

  “I told you people thought we were cursed, Pa,” said Zadok.

  “Plus, we have no money,” added Myra. “And on top of that we look different than everyone else.”

  “Your appearance mattered?”

  “Yes. Nobody really mentioned our skin color until the curse nonsense came up. But it got bad after that, especially when Ma went to work for Omri.” She snorted, though her voice lacked any mirth. “It’s almost funny, people made fun of us because we looked different, but that’s also why all the men passing through town wanted Ma more than the others. Of course, that only angered the other women at the Soiled Dove since she was taking so much of their business. Always outsiders. Like I said, I understand why Aunt Ava didn’t want to come home. I wouldn’t have either.”

  “I’m sorry,” I whispered, unsure what else I could say and trying to block out Lasha’s time at the Soiled Dove.

  Myra’s comment sucked the life out of the conversation. Zadok’s attempt to revitalize it didn’t help.

  “Hey Pa, did you ever kill anyone?” he asked, excited.

  I grunted. “Hard not to.”

  “I bet you killed a lot of people, huh? Tell me some of those stories.”

  I forced a smile. “Maybe another time, Son. It’s getting late and you’ve had a long day. Why don’t you get some sleep?”

  “Oh c’mon.”

  “He’s right, Zadok. Go to bed. We won’t be far behind.”

  “Fine.” He shot Myra a look, then climbed farther into the lean-to and lay down. Myra gave him the blanket to sleep with. Within seconds, a faint snore floated out to us.

  “That was fast.”

  “He was more tired than he let on. But he would have stayed up all night if you hadn’t said something.” Myra shook at a chill. I undid my cloak and held it out to her.

  “I’m fine,” she said, trying to dismiss me.

  “No, you’re not.”

  “What about you?”

  “My clothes are warmer than yours. Take it.�
��

  She did, reluctantly wrapping herself in it. I smiled. “You know, you used to wear my cloak all the time when we’d sit on the porch in the evenings. I used to enjoy that time together.”

  She cleared her throat. “I’m glad you didn’t answer Zadok’s question about killing. I know he’s been through a lot, but I still think he’s too young to be hearing that stuff.”

  I frowned, both because of her refusal to admit the relationship we had in the past and because of where the conversation had turned. I threw a small stick into the fire. “I don’t know if you ever get old enough to hear about it. Definitely not to experience it.”

  Myra cocked her head to the side. “The way you were going on before, made me think you enjoyed being in the army.”

  “I enjoyed the friendships I made, especially those that lasted long enough to see me out of service, but not much else. Don’t get me wrong, I was good at what I did. Real good, actually. But that doesn’t mean I enjoyed all the killing. Soldiers used to joke that men like me only survived for as long as I did by being good at killing or being good at hiding.” I shrugged. “Hiding never suited me, I guess.”

  “But you do miss those you served with?”

  “Sure. They became like a family to me.”

  “More important to you than your real family I’d wager.”

  I frowned. “What makes you say that?”

  She looked away. “Because it took you ten years to come back.”

  “I had no choice. If I had deserted to come home, they would have just sent someone to hunt me down and fetch me back. If I had refused, they would have killed me to set an example to others wanting to desert. They likely would have taken the farm away too in order to make the point stronger.”

  She snorted. “Well, we lost that anyway. Zadok said he told you everything that happened while you were gone.”

  I nodded. “I’m sorry. I know that means little to you now, but that’s all I can say.”

  Silence stretched.

  “When you got back from trapping, did you think someone took us?”

  “At first. But after I examined the evidence, a more likely scenario was that you ran off.”

  “Were you going to come after us?”

  “Of course. I was just ready to leave when you came back.”

  She stared at the flames. “You know I wanted to. Even with little in the way of a plan, I wanted to run away.”

  That hurt. “Why didn’t you?”

  “Zadok refused to go.”

  “Why not just go by yourself?”

  “Because he’s all I got.” She met my eyes. “I’m not going anywhere without him.”

  Without another word she moved into the lean-to, laid down and draped an arm over her brother.

  I watched them until Myra’s breathing matched Zadok’s and I knew they were both asleep. “Because he’s all I got” still rang in my ears.

  I stoked the fire, and settled down beside it in order to compensate for the lack of cloak or blanket. Lying on my back, I stared up through the tree canopy into the starry sky.

  The last thing I remembered before closing my eyes was hoping that in time Myra might see things differently.

  It was definitely not the homecoming I had expected.

  CHAPTER 14

  “Now?” Zadok whispered.

  He squatted just above the creek’s surface. Straddling two large stones protruding from the water, he stared down at the fish playing as though it wanted to go through the narrowing between the stones.

  “No. Not yet,” I answered, voice just as low. I stood in the shin-high water, squatting almost as low as Zadok. The cold water sent a chill up my spine I tried to suppress. Shafts of morning sun flitting through the tree canopy illuminated our potential breakfast.

  “But he’s so close.”

  “Not close enough.” I watched the fish decide his path downstream. “Remember, this takes patience.”

  “Now?” he asked, excitement trying to break free as the fish finally made its move.

  “Now!” I yelled.

  Zadok’s hands darted into the water splashing it up into my face and bare chest. The jerking motion caused him to lose his balance. He pitched forward. My arms shot out to catch him. The shift made my foot slip on the algae in the river bed. We both crashed into the chilly water. If I hadn’t been awake before, I definitely was after that.

  I sat up gasping, soaked head to toe. Above my labored breathing came Zadok’s giggling laugh. He was jumping up and down on his way to the bank. “I got it, Pa! I got it!”

  In his hands squirmed a ten-inch long, striped yellow fish.

  I forgot the cold, jumped up, and dashed toward him, laughing just as loud, partly because of how the catch had occurred and partly because of his reaction to it. I grabbed him in my arms and gave him a big hug. “I’m so proud of you, Son. That was unbelievable.”

  “Thanks Pa, you’re a good teacher.”

  In that one perfect moment, I got a glimpse of the life I had always imagined I’d have—a life filled with moments that I had taken for granted before I joined the army. Teaching my kids how to fish just as my pa had taught me and Ava had been something I just knew I would do. Never did I think something so insignificant would hold the importance it did now.

  I put Zadok down, but we were still jumping around and laughing like fools when I heard Myra’s voice.

  “Zadok! Zadok! Where are you?” She sounded almost frantic.

  “I’m over here!” he yelled back.

  She emerged through the trees a moment later. One hand held the unsheathed dagger I had given her the night before. The other she used to keep my cloak pulled tightly about her. Sleep still haunted her eyes.

  “What in the name of the gods are you doing? I was worried something had happened to you.”

  “Why?” he asked. “I was with Pa. He’s teaching me how to fish.” He showed her the wriggling catch.

  “We’ve got three more over there,” I said pointing. “Enough for breakfast after we clean them. No more luck with the rabbit traps last night, so I thought this would make a good alternative.”

  “Why didn’t you wake me?” she asked.

  “We tried,” said Zadok. “But you wouldn’t budge.”

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t mean to scare you. It just looked like you could do with the extra rest.”

  She gave me a look, then turned her attention back to Zadok. “Why are you soaking wet? Did you catch the fish with your whole body?”

  “I slipped. Pa tried to catch me, and we both fell in.” He chuckled.

  “Well, at least you’ve got your shirts off,” she said grabbing them off a low hanging branch.

  “Yeah, Pa was worried they might get wet.”

  “He must be a soothsayer,” she said sarcastically. She took off my cloak and wrapped it around Zadok. “Go back to the clearing and get out of those wet pants until they dry. The last thing you need is to catch a cold.”

  “But the fish—”

  “Myra’s right,” I said. “I’ll take care of the fish.”

  “No,” she said. “I’ll take care of the fish. You should go do the same and get out of your wet clothes. You can stay under the blanket until they dry by the fire.”

  “I’ll be all right.”

  “You don’t need to be getting sick either,” she said, giving me a look, head cocked, mouth puckered. Her expression softened. “What?”

  I blinked. “You remind me so much of your mother. You even sound like her.”

  She looked away.

  That had been the wrong thing to say.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”

  “Go back to the fire, Tyrus,” she said, voice melancholy.

  I thought about pressing. “All right.”

  With my entire body damp, and the day still trying to warm, the comfort of the blanket was a welcome relief as Zadok and I huddled around the fire. He was still going on about his catch when Myra called
out. “Everyone decent?”

  “We’re covered,” I said.

  She entered the clearing with four cleaned fish. Grabbing the skillet from my sack, the only other significant piece of cooking equipment I owned, she began cutting the fish up and placing them inside. I directed her to the salt and pepper I kept in a small pouch. I hadn’t realized how hungry I was until the buttery smell of the fish hit my nostrils. I swallowed the sudden outpouring of saliva before I resembled a house dog waiting for scraps.

  The yellow fish cooked quickly. Within minutes of their cooling, we sat near each other eating communally out of the one skillet. I made a mental note to pick up a couple of plates to make meal times in the future easier.

  After a few bites I began to slow. Myra gave me a look. “Eat.”

  “It’s all right. I’m not that hungry.”

  “Don’t lie to me, Tyrus. I woke up to your stomach growling during the night. I know you skimped on what you ate for dinner so we could have more. Don’t do it again. There’s more than enough food, and you feeling weak isn’t going to do any of us any good.”

  I nodded at the sound advice, noticing the stark contrast between my children. Almost twelve, Zadok still acted and spoke very much like a boy at times, somehow maintaining all the excitement and even a bit of the innocence associated with childhood. Myra spoke like a grown woman. In fact, she spoke like a mother. I didn’t have to ask why. Given what they had been through, Myra had likely become the mother to Zadock that Lasha could not have been as she tried to keep them fed.

  I followed my daughter’s advice, though I still held back some. Zadok after all, seemed to have a bottomless pit. By the time Myra disposed of the bones and cleaned up the skillet, our clothes had mostly dried and she was in a better mood.

  Zadok and I threw our clothes back on. I made sure to hide my boiled leather under my shirt. It wasn’t going to fool anyone up close. However, I hoped I might appear less threatening.

  Zadok chattered away to his sister about his catch, going over every detail to her for at least the third time. The affection she had for her brother was obvious. She acted just as excited and in awe with the third telling as she pretended on the first. When the story came to a conclusion, she looked my way before Zadok could start again.