Beyond Control

by Karice Bolton

  I stood in front of the bathroom mirror, brushed my teeth, brushed my hair, and I tugged slightly on my tank top to expose the scar. I spotted the special body makeup I had on the counter that I sometimes used to conceal it. Not that it really did. Actually, all the makeup did was make me more insecure as I worried about it rubbing off on my clothes or anything else that my skin might be in contact with. Instead, I reached for some face powder and mascara and called it good.

  A loud knock on the front door interrupted my thoughts, and my hands got immediately clammy. What was happening to me? This wasn’t how things went in my world. I was supposed to be in control. I grabbed an elastic band for my hair and walked quickly to the front door.

  “Who is it?” I asked, buying myself a fraction of a second.

  “How many people are you expecting?” The sultriness in his voice about knocked me to the floor, and I still had the wood separating us.

  I swung open the door to see him leaning against the doorframe. The outfit he was wearing did nothing to help the functioning of my mind. It also didn’t hurt that as he raised his arm to push his sunglasses back, his white shirt tugged up just enough for me to see the slight V-definition leading down into his loose fitting jeans.

  I looked up quickly, but he had caught me staring. I was about to make an excuse but didn’t even bother. What I did do, however, surprised us both as I stepped outside and wrapped my arms around his neck.

  “Good morning,” I said softly, looking up into his eyes.

  “Good morning to you too,” he murmured, hugging me tightly. “Something smells delicious.”

  “It’s the apricot bars I made for our ride,” I said, watching his lips move closer to mine.

  “No, it’s something like raspberry or…”

  “Oh, that’s my lotion.” I couldn’t help but smile as his eyes held the look of complete intoxication.

  “Like I said, delicious,” he murmured, sending a chill up my spine.

  I couldn’t help but giggle, but his lips found mine instantly quieting me. Closing my eyes, I felt his body press against mine as our kisses deepened as if we were picking up where we left off last night before…

  The oven chimed and I felt his arms loosen around my waist.

  “Our timing sucks,” I groaned, pulling his shirt to follow me inside.

  “Are you here alone?” he asked, his voice low.

  “Nope,” I said, walking into the kitchen. “But we could…”

  He shook his head. “Sorry. It’s hard not to get ahead of myself with you. Let’s just stick with the plan.”

  “Whatever the plan is,” I said, laughing.

  He followed me into the kitchen and I took the apricot bars out of the oven and put them on the stove.

  “They’re not cool enough to cut,” I said, weighing my options. “But I could probably slice them in half and use a spatula to get them into a container so we can get on the road.”

  “Now that I’m with you, I’m in no hurry,” he murmured, coming up behind me.

  He slid my hair to the side and placed his lips against the crook of my neck, sending a wave of pleasure through me. He began gently placing kisses along my shoulder, and I was frozen in his presence, feeling the desire that continued to grow between us.

  “Baking has never been so fun,” I said, my voice trembling as his lips continued tracing along my skin. He hadn’t shaved this morning, and the stubble tickled my flesh with each movement.

  “That’s good to hear,” he murmured, pulling back. He held me in his arms for a few seconds, turning me slowly to face him.

  The intensity in his eyes wasn’t like anything I’d experienced before. Seeing that type of hunger, that type of need directed toward me made my pulse quicken.

  “You ready for our ride?” he asked, grinning his wicked grin that almost made my knees buckle.

  “Yeah,” I said, my voice breathless. “I’ll get my leathers on and…”

  “God! That sounds sexy,” he said, laughing.

  “Don’t let it go to your head. We’ve got a full day ahead of us,” I said, secretly wishing we could scrap the ride.

  I went to the hall closet and grabbed my jacket, pants, and helmet. My eyes fell to the bag down the hall that Brandy packed, and I almost started laughing. How was I going to look inconspicuous lugging that down to the bike and strapping it on.

  “Need help?” Jason asked, walking slowly toward me. His eyes coasting along my body as I stepped into the pants.

  “I think I’ve got it. You could put the bars in the Ziploc container,” I said, hoping he’d leave so I could have a moment to get my wits about me.

  “Sure thing,” he said, glancing at the bag in the hall. He turned to look at me and smiled as he saw the flush crawl up my face.

  “Well, I thought I might need—”

  “No need to explain anything here,” he said, laughing.

  I watched him walk down the hallway and noticed that there wasn’t a bad angle to be found on that man.

  “I snuck a bite, and I have to tell you that these are amazing,” he said, smiling, as I walked into the kitchen.

  “Like I can tell if your intentions are solid,” I said, scrunching my face. “But thank you. Ready?”

  “Let’s hit it,” he said, grabbing the bag that I had hauled from the hall.

  As I grabbed my phone, I received a text from Carla, letting me know my dad was getting released earlier than expected and that he’d be home resting before the afternoon even ended.

  “The medical advancements nowadays are crazy,” I said, shaking my head. “If only my grandpa could’ve held on a few more years, I think he’d still be here.”

  “Very true,” Jason replied, opening the front door as I slipped under his arm. “If only more people would be open-minded about organ donation too.”

  The moment I heard those words I froze and turned to look at him. I studied his expression as he came into the hallway with me. He didn’t seem to be pointing it directly at me, but the coincidence seemed too great to brush off. Did he know?

  “Very true,” I replied, pressing the elevator button.

  “Do you have any places you have your heart set on seeing today?” he asked, his eyes mischievous.

  Okay. I think it was only coincidence. Not that it really mattered at this point since I was planning on telling him soon. But still, I wanted to be the one to tell him.

  The elevator opened up and I climbed in with Jason following close behind. My helmet clanked against the wall as I leaned against the railing. I had my helmet in one hand and the apricot bars in the other.

  “You know I was thinking if you’d be up for it,” he hesitated for a slight second.

  “Yeah?” I prompted.

  “I only had a small bite because it burned the piss out of my mouth, but those bars were incredible. If you’d be interested, I’d love to sell some at my espresso shop.”

  “Really?” I asked, stepping out of the elevator into the lobby.

  He nodded.

  “You don’t have to say that to score points, you know.” We both started laughing as we went through the glass doors to the sidewalk.

  “I have a business to run. I wouldn’t offer if I didn’t mean it,” he said as we walked to his bike

  Then it hit me. I was turning into a complete ditz in his presence.

  “My bike’s in the garage,” I admitted sheepishly.

  “I wondered about that,” he said, smirking. “But I didn’t want to ask.”

  “That was very polite of you,” I said, shaking my head. “You just have this way about you.” I tapped my helmet against his shoulder.

  “I’ll put your bag on my bike and then you can be the keeper of the apricot bars,” he said, his eyes falling to my mouth. “I’ll wait for you to circle around.”

  “Perfect,” I replied. “And I’ll try not to pull any U-turns or anything.”

  “You work on that,” he said, securing the bag on his bike.

&
nbsp; We had ridden all over the island, stopping twice to snack on the apricot bars, which were now gone, and once to pick up an iced-latte from his espresso shop. By the time late afternoon rolled around, I was exhausted. But as I followed him down a long, narrow driveway, headed toward the water, my stamina magically picked up. Cedar trees lined the drive, along with equally monstrous rhododendrons speckled underneath, and I could spot a glimmer of blue off in the distance. As we rounded the corner, there was no missing the house or the guesthouse or the second garage. Wow! Not what I expected.

  The home was gorgeous, and even though it was large, it didn’t take away from the beautiful landscape the home was tucked in. Jason pulled in front of the large porch and turned off his bike, and I did the same. He took off his helmet and placed it on the seat, waiting for me to get off my bike as well, but I was too busy taking in the surroundings. Even though the sun was shining brightly, the large conifers shaded the entire area, dropping the temp probably ten or more degrees. Perfect after riding all day.

  The style was definitely rustic and fitted Jason perfectly. The siding was stained a dark brown, with exposed shingles tucked under the peaked eaves. The porch was wrapped in flagstone, and there were a few pots with straggly looking plants. Apparently flowers didn’t flourish everywhere on the island. I turned to the left and saw the large garage, which matched the exterior of the main house and guesthouse.

  I unstrapped my helmet and ran my fingers through my hair to loosen the braids I had pulled my hair into a few hours ago and noticed as much as I was taking in the property, Jason seemed to be doing the same to me. I hid my smile and glanced at him before looking over at his extra garage.

  “That’s where my shop is,” he said, walking over to me.

  “I thought you had a shop in Seattle,” I said.

  “I do. This is for my personal collection and side projects.”

  “Wow. That’s nice,” I said, my eyes taking in the guesthouse.

  “Do you get lots of guests?” I asked, arching a brow.

  “You’d be surprised,” he laughed.

  “Really,” I said, crossing my arms.

  “Something about living on the islands and people suddenly want to visit. When I was renting a place I learned that the hard way. I had a two bedroom and the second one was always filled. Needless to say, I realized I might have more hermit tendencies than I realized. Plus if anyone’s had too much fun, they can crash in privacy.”

  “Nothing wrong with that,” I said. “You just like your space.”

  I thought about Brandy and I adored living with her. She was an awesome roommate, and it worked for us both, sort of. As long as we weren’t in relationships it was fine, and back in college, that’s just how it was. Now I wasn’t so sure I was a believer.

  “The grounds here are lovely. Everything’s so beautiful,” I said, taking in a deep breath, feeling the balmy air enter my lungs.

  “Thank you,” he said, reaching for my hand. “Ready to take a peek inside?”

  “Absolutely,” I said, feeling a wave of excitement push through my veins. I had to calm down.

  “Your father made a really generous offer to us both,” Jason said, sensing my awe as we walked toward the main house. But it wasn’t so much that I was in awe over the house, but rather that our tastes were so similar.

  “My father’s never generous. He only makes smart business moves,” I said, smiling. “What you had to sell was obviously worth paying a good sum for. But still, I’d bet that you both got the shaft.”

  Jason’s laugh cut through the quietness of the setting, and I turned toward him, flashing a smile. “Sorry. That’s just the truth.”

  “Aaron said the same thing,” Jason said, shaking his head. “It was more than enough for me, though. I was able to do what I really wanted.”

  “That’s what matters.”

  We walked toward the front door, and I heard barking coming out from behind the front door.

  “You have dogs?” I asked.

  He turned around and smiled at me. “Two. Tomato and Sunny,” he said, beaming.

  “Tomato?” I asked, laughing as he shoved the key into the lock.

  “Don’t kill the messenger. She’s a rescue and came with the name. I call her Tommie.”

  “What kind are they?” I asked as he pushed open the door.

  “You’ll see,” he said, his voice hesitant as two bouncing dogs came running up to him. I was in shock as I looked down at Tomato and Sunny. One was an English Bulldog and the other a Sheltie. This was nuts! I turned to him and scowled, crossing my arms as they leapt on him, and he scratched their chins.

  “Did you rent these?” I asked grinning, and pointing at the two spoiled pooches.

  “Wow, Ms. Sullivan, is that a smirk I see unfolding on your lips?” he asked, his playfulness igniting something deep inside me.

  I rolled my eyes and pushed him gently before scratching the sheltie’s ear.

  “No. Didn’t have time to go to the rent-a-pup this morning. They’re all mine. Aren’t you, girls?” he said to them, petting their heads. “Do you really think I’d go to that much trouble to get you in bed?”

  “Do you really think that’s all it would take?” I laughed.

  “I think I had you the moment I saw you on the bridge,” he murmured, as the girls ran off down the hall.

  “Is that so?” I said, absolutely astonished that he was so sure of himself. But he was right.

  “I see your softer side is coming out again,” I said, hitting his arm, but he grabbed my hand. “Now show me around before—”

  “Before what?” he interrupted, pressing a kiss against my knuckles.

  “I don’t even know,” I said, my pulse quickening as his eyes locked on mine.

  A wicked grin spread across his lips as he feigned a victory.

  “What is it about you?” I started laughing nervously as I thought about my words. Really… what was it about him that was so arresting, so absolutely mind-numbing? It had to be more than that smile. There were a lot of good-looking men out there so what was it about him that pulled me to him like this? Made me feel like I was the luckiest person in the world?

  “Now to show you around,” he said abruptly, knowing exactly what he was doing to me. “This is the entry.”

  “I figured that,” I teased, looking around.

  Actually, I had been so blindsided with Tomato and Sunny that I hadn’t really looked around. The interior was as beautiful as the exterior. There was a bench pushed along the far wall, and a set of stairs to the right. The room was painted a deep burgundy, but rather than making the place feel dark or small, it just made it feel cozy.

  “This way takes us to the great room,” he said, pulling me down the hallway. When we made it to the room, I saw the two pooches snuggled together on a chair; one of them was gently starting to snore. The room was perfect, absolutely perfect. It wasn’t bare. There were actually things on the shelves and magazines on the tables. A large slate fireplace was in the corner of the room. Two large leather couches were in an L-shape surrounding the hearth, and I felt more at home here than where I lived.

  I turned to the left and the view took my breath away. How I didn’t notice it right away was beyond me.

  “Wow. I’ve never seen anything like this,” I said, walking toward the glass wall.

  “It works like a garage door. The whole wall rolls up. It brings the outside in,” he said, almost apologizing. “It might be a little over the top, but I really like it.”

  I looked out over the water at his private Northwest lagoon and completely understood why he loved it here. I would too.

  “It’s amazing,” I said, looking out over the deck.

  He followed my gaze to the outside shower, and I blushed.

  “Isn’t it a little cold here for one of those?” I asked, raising a brow.

  “You’d be surprised. It’s really refreshing…” A slight tug of his lips and I knew he was trying not to give away too
much. There was more he was trying to say.

  “Well, I’d love to try it out sometime,” I said unabashedly as I turned toward the kitchen. “It just keeps getting better,” I whispered as I walked into the kitchen, taking in the large Viking stove and double ovens.

  “Does it?” he asked, knowing full well the kitchen would impress me.

  “Do you cook much?” I asked.

  “Enough. I actually enjoy it,” he said, coming up behind me.

  He slid his arm around my waist, and my breath caught as I thought about his touch elsewhere.

  “I’ll show you the upstairs, and you can make yourself at home while I finish preparing dinner,” he murmured, sensing my wandering thoughts.

  “That sounds like a wonderful idea,” I agreed. I really wanted a shower or bath or something to wash away the day of riding. “We’ve gotta get my bag off your bike.”

  “Right,” he said. “I’ll go grab it. Did you want anything to drink? I’ve got wine, iced-tea, some sort of lemonade that has bubbles, and probably a few lone beers rolling around in the fridge,” he replied, heading back down the hall. “Help yourself.”

  I opened the door to the refrigerator and saw bins full of fresh produce and a glass tray with something marinating. For a guy who doesn’t drink, he certainly keeps a stocked fridge. I grabbed a carbonated fruit juice and twisted the cap off. I felt the cool liquid trickle down my throat, unaware of how thirsty I was.

  “Got it,” he shouted from the foyer.

  “So there’s a place I can take a shower?” I asked, grabbing my bag from him.

  I caught a flicker in his eyes as he nodded, and my insides completely melted.

  “Come on up. I’ll show you the upstairs, and then you can have free reign of the place,” he said, grinning.

  “Better watch out or I’ll take you up on that offer.”

  When we got upstairs, he pointed to the first two bedrooms and bathroom and kept walking.

  “You can put your stuff in here. This room’s got an ensuite attached so you don’t have to worry about bumping into me in the hallway,” he said, his eyes mischievous. I followed behind him as we walked into the bedroom. It was huge. The walls were painted a soft beige, but there was some sort of light texture on the walls. The furniture was light pine and the comforter was bright white with pleats. It actually had a very feminine touch to it.