Hope

by Sydney Lane

  So, this is how a fraternity party comes together.

  Jenna boldly walks over and changes the music, making several selections in advance. "Come on! Let's find Quincy and shake our asses for those boys of ours," she yells over Nelly rapping about it gettin' hot in here.

  "Oh no, not me. I mean, it's not like that with us." I try to correct her, but she's already shaking her head, that same smirk on her lips. Something tells me she never loses an argument.

  "Look at him and tell me it's not like that." She tilts her chin, nodding over my shoulder. I'm almost afraid to look, afraid of what I'll find. But it's only Declan.

  Declan is leaning against the wall with one foot propped behind him as he takes a long swallow from his beer. He's dressed in ripped jeans and an untucked light blue polo shirt, his smoldering eyes assessing me. Hot. I know this Declan, but I've never seen him in public.

  I'm spellbound. Either the drink is working or my sex really is on fire.

  "Oh, good grief. Come on before you two pull a disappearing act." Jenna tugs on my arm, drawing me into the crowd that's quickly gathering in the room. "Yo, Quincy! Time to dance!" She calls out to her friend who appears to be otherwise occupied by a certain touchy-feely bad boy.

  When she hears Jenna, Quincy raises her arms in the air, swatting Brody's hands away, and smoothly glides through the throng of people. And just like that, we're dancing and laughing like a normal group of friends.

  Except there's nothing normal about us, and we're not really friends.

  Quincy smiles brightly, her eyes wide and innocent, her body moving with the music. She's so tiny and delicate, and I briefly wonder if Declan still wants her, if he still loves her. But mostly, it makes me wonder what he sees in me.

  I expected to feel weird around these girls, but everything about them is genuine, inviting. With Jenna loudly rapping the lyrics and Quincy dancing like we're on Soul Train, I finally begin to relax.

  There'll be time for confronting the past later.

  There always is.

  Chapter 27

  Declan

  I just walked into an alternate universe where the two girls I care most about in this world are dancing. Together.

  Quincy looks more comfortable in her own skin than I've ever seen her, oblivious to everyone in the room. She always loved dancing, and I always loved watching her.

  And then, there's Liza. She dances with abandon, her movements wild and free.

  When she showed up at the door and threw herself into my arms, my heart melted. She's always so damn strong, so tough on the surface, but that hug told me something she'd never want me to know. It said that sometimes, she's just a girl.

  A girl who needs a hug.

  A girl who confuses me, surprises me, and has me totally wrapped in knots.

  When she dips low and slowly rises, her hands skimming her thighs, she tosses a sultry glance over her shoulder. Our eyes meet in that heated moment, and I instantly want her. It's as if our bodies speak a language of their own, one I clearly understand even when I don't understand anything else.

  The song ends, and a very slow, seductive rhythm replaces it. Brody approaches Quincy from behind, pulling her against his chest, and Eric wraps his arms around Jenna's waist, playfully palming her ass, drawing her close.

  Liza looks around uncomfortably before moving to walk away. It would be a shame to miss this opportunity to just simply hold her, to show her another side of me. Of us.

  I toss my beer in a trash can and squeeze through a group of girls until I reach Liza. I step into her path, her eyes widening in surprise as I stand before her. Unexpectedly, she rushes into my arms, burying her face in my chest, and while I love having her in my arms, I know something's not right. Liza isn't a hugger.

  Wrapping my arms around her waist, I push my doubts to the back of my mind and hope she'll accept what I'm offering. Lord knows, she'd never actually ask for anything.

  As we begin swaying side to side, her body flush against mine, I feel a spark, a connection, between us. It's indescribable, like nothing I've ever felt before. And like a bolt of lightning, I see things so clearly...

  What I felt for Quincy wasn't like this. I was fiercely protective of her, and I wanted to rescue her. I thought I wanted to be with her, but when it came down to it, I didn't even fight for her. I didn't even try.

  I convinced myself it was because I saw how she and Brody looked at each other. Or because I was still so angry over the way things happened. Or maybe I just wanted to move on. But, no, that wasn't it.

  The bottom line is this: I didn't fight because I didn't want it bad enough.

  I didn't fight because I just wanted Quincy to be happy, and deep down, I knew I wasn't the one who made her happy. It didn't take a rocket scientist to see the writing on the wall.

  But right here, in my arms, is a girl I'll fight for. I will fight her demons. I will fight her nightmares. I will fight for her happiness... and unlike Quincy, I know I'm the one who can make her happy. I may not be fighting another guy for her, but I'm in a battle nonetheless. Sometimes, the demons you can't see are harder to fight than the ones you can.

  My hips cradle hers, her body a perfect fit for mine. It doesn't matter that she isn't the one I wanted. She's the one I needed.

  I just didn't know it yet.

  Liza's arms tighten around me, her heart pounding against my chest, her chest rising and falling beneath my hands. I close my eyes, breathing her in, and wish against wishes that I could absorb her pain, just take it all away.

  As the song ends, I open my eyes to find Quincy openly watching me. Nestled in Brody's arms, her lips curl into a delicate smile, her eyes shining brightly. For once, finally, she's looking at me as her friend instead of someone she pities. That look, it frees me.

  I give Liza a tight squeeze before releasing her. When she steps back, her eyes are haunted, needy, and begging for the things she'll never ask for. Whatever it is, whatever she needs, I will find a way to give it to her. If only she'll let me.

  Jenna and Quincy rush over, laughing and dancing, as they surround Liza and whisk her away. The intense look on her face is replaced by an impish grin, as if she's not really sure what to do. I'll never be able to thank the girls enough for what they're doing, what they've already done. Whether they know it or not, they're helping her hold herself together.

  "Ah, women... they hold the power of the world in the palms of their hands." Seth claps me on the back, his eyes on Corrine as she joins the girls. They form a tight circle, singing and laughing as they bounce up and down. Watching, I wait for Seth to impart more of his infinite wisdom. "Especially when they're wrapped around my-"

  "Stop."

  "What?"

  "Just... just stop."

  "I was just going to say when they're wrapped around my gear shift." He coughs into his hand. "You know, my truck is very... powerful." I hate to encourage him, but I can't help laughing. Honestly, everybody needs a friend like Seth, someone to remind them not to take life so seriously.

  "You and Corrine good?" I ask, still watching the girls.

  "Naw, man. I mean, we're cool, but it's not like that." He sways on his feet before leaning against the wall beside me, watching the girls, too.

  After Seth tried to leave the club with another girl the other night, I wasn't sure Corrine would come around. What he did was so disrespectful... well, on second thought, I really shouldn't be surprised. Something I will never understand is why girls want the guys who treat them the worst.

  "Yeah, it is like that. It's always like that once you cross that invisible line," I explain. Corrine isn't a one night stand kind of girl, so you gotta wonder what she's doing with Seth.

  "We talk about it. I don't hide anything." He sighs, closing his eyes as he rests his head against the wall. "It's just that girls never see things the way you think they do even when they think they do."

  "Say what?" Sometimes, I wonder if we even speak the same language.

  "Yo
u know, they say they get it, and they try to convince themselves they do, but in the end, they ruin everything. They just can't keep their emotions out of it." He opens his eyes, a cocky grin spreading across his face. "So, what d'you think about your girls becoming 'BFFs'?" He makes air quotes, laughing at what should be my discomfort.

  "Only one of them is mine." His eyes widen before he claps be on the back, knocking me forward and causing me to spill beer down the front of my shirt.

  So, yeah, that's a lie. Neither of them belongs to me. Not yet.

  "Do I even wanna know?" he asks, his gruff voice growing wary. I feel him watching me, waiting, but I don't answer. Instead, I watch Liza as she dances, and for once, I don't see a broken girl. I see someone who's trying her best not to fall apart, and right now, in this moment... she's succeeding.

  Chapter 28

  Eliza

  I stretch, arching my back and yawning, as I snuggle into the warmth wrapped around me. Last night was surreal, so much like a dream that it's almost a nightmare.

  I did it. I ruined everything. I let my guard down, and now, I'm going to pay for it. I don't know when- or how- but somehow, this will be taken away from me.

  But for now, I have it. I think I'm happy. I haven't felt like this for a long time, and I'm going to hold onto it for dear life.

  Smiling, I open my eyes and am awed by the sheer beauty of the man beside me. I envy his dark eyelashes, the way they curl on his cheek, the perfect frame for the deepest, darkest, most expressive eyes I've ever seen. I always get the feeling he sees so much more than I know. His full lips are slightly parted in sleep, inviting me, tempting me to taste them. With a full blown five-o'-clock shadow, he reminds me of a movie star, completely and utterly irresistible. My eyes wander lower, to his chiseled chest, tight abs... and insanely long, muscular legs.

  Last night, I showed up on his doorstep, angry and confused, my pain closer to the surface than I've ever allowed it. I wanted to use him and let him use me, but things didn't go as planned. Jenna was determined to dance until my legs fell off. Quincy wasn't the complete bitch I wanted her to be, and Corrine... well, let's just say she's on my shit list. For real.

  All I know for sure is that Jenna kept handing me drinks, the music got louder, and Declan got hotter by the minute. No matter what I was doing or where he was in the room, I could feel his eyes on me, searing me with their heat, caressing me with their chocolate warmth. There was a surreal moment, when the music faded and the crowded room melted away, when time stood perfectly still, that I felt him, his essence, surround me. The voices in my head hushed to a whisper... still there, still painful... but bearable.

  That's the closest I've been to happiness in a long damn time.

  All night long, I felt his presence. A few times, he danced with me, pulling me close as his warmth seeped into me. Once, I caught him watching Quincy while she danced with Brody. They shared a look I didn't understand.

  "Are you trying to make her jealous?" I accused, the question escaping my lips before I could swallow it down. Not sure I wanted to hear the answer, a rush of adrenaline spiked through me, leaving me raw and agitated.

  "What?" His eyes widened, meeting mine in confusion. "I'm right where I want to be, Liza." No denial, just truth. Pulling me closer, he hugged me tightly to his chest, a hand on my lower back and another cradling my head on his shoulder.

  I snuggled into him, my heart racing with anxiety. His touch was too intimate, striking fear directly into my core. I closed my eyes, breathing deeply, as I struggled with my deepest fears. This- this is why I never let them touch me, why I have to be in control. The same reason I never spend the night and never, ever go back for round two.

  I resisted the urge to shove against his chest, to put distance between us. I continued to take slow, deep breaths, counting to ten several times before I was able to relax in his arms. Once I did, I found myself melting against him, wanting to crawl inside him for more. I could've stayed there forever.

  Such dangerous thoughts for a girl like me.

  The whole night was surreal. Corrine and I dancing with Jenna and Quincy, being accepted by girls I would never intentionally hang out with, Declan holding me, me letting him hold me, the Sex On Fire that really made my sex feel like it was on fire... and I wanted it, this thing I didn't even know I'd been missing. Life.

  The moment was broken when the song changed to I'm Sexy and I Know It and Seth began dry-humping me from behind, sandwiching me between Declan and him. The look on Declan's face was priceless. He looked like he was ready to hit Seth, but I burst out laughing, bumping and grinding with the wild man... and the not so wild man.

  Finally, Declan relaxed, shaking his head at Seth's wild antics. He backed away, and for a second, I thought he was going to leave me with alone with the crazy buffoon. He walked backwards, clearing the space around him before grinning sheepishly at me and turning sideways, rocking back and forth on his heels. Seth grabbed my hands, raising them over my head and whooping loudly as he danced behind me. Declan proceeded to shock me with his sexy moves, a talent I would have never guessed he possessed.

  The song ended, and Seth hugged me from behind, his chin resting on my shoulder. "Be careful with him, Liza." His words sent shivers through me, setting off several thoughts at once. Before I could recover, several people around us began clapping for Declan's performance, but he was watching me, gauging my reaction, and I clapped along with them. Seth released me, and a look of relief passed over Declan's face.

  The later it got, people started pairing off and hooking up. Brody held Quincy in the most precious way, and I realized I'd been wrong about him. He's a total babe, not the jack-off I imagined him to be. I began to wonder what else I might've been wrong about.

  After dancing to another slow song, Declan reached for my hand, leading me upstairs to his room. As soon as the door closed behind me, he pushed me against the wall, his mouth hovering over mine. Our breaths mingled together as his eyes penetrated mine. I remember thinking I could get lost in his eyes just before he leaned in closer, our lips a breath apart but still not touching. His hands were on my hips, pinning me to the door, his thigh spreading my legs. I reached for him, my hands clasped around his waist. I closed my eyes, wanting, craving his lips more than anything else. Just when his lips grazed mine, his tongue flicking out to taste me, a loud banging from the other side of the wall startled me.

  My eyes popped open, and Declan groaned, rolling his eyes. I was about to ask what the hell was going on, but I got an answer quicker than I expected.

  "Fuck, yeah, baby! Give it to me." A long pause. "Yeah, just like that."

  "Harder, Seth! Harder!" I recognized that voice.

  Hence, the reason I'm going to kill Corrine. Honest to God, I thought they were going to fuck their way through the wall. There was nothing to do but lie back and pray it would end, but apparently, Seth Henley is a fucking machine. A hot, wild, and vocal machine at that.

  More banging, lots of groans, and two hours later, they were still at it. Needless to say, it totally killed the mood.

  Before I murder her, I'm going to tell Corrine just what I think about her porn star moans and scripted performance.

  Chapter 29

  Declan

  Something is tickling my nose. I slap at it and come in contact with skin. Very soft, sweet-smelling skin.

  My eyes snap open, and I find Liza lying on her stomach, her chin propped up on a fist as she uses a string to tickle me. Her eyes are bright and playful, a smile teasing her lips. I find myself smiling back.

  "Good morning." She giggles, throwing the string on the floor. The sound fascinates me, and I'm momentarily dazed by the beauty before me. I must be dreaming; that's the only thing that can explain it. "Declan, are you awake?" She leans over me, looking into my eyes.

  In a flash, I roll over, pinning her beneath me. Her face registers shock just seconds before her eyes flare with heat. With my thigh tucked between her legs and her arms secured ove
r her head, she smiles helplessly.

  I lean down, my lips skimming the tender skin of her shoulder, and whisper, "This is how I want to wake up every day." Instantly, she stops struggling, her body relaxing into the bed. For a second, I think I said the wrong thing, that maybe I've pushed too far, but when I raise my head, she's still smiling.

  "That's because I'm good like that." She rolls her eyes, biting her lip to hide her smile.

  "Yes... you are." I roll my hips slightly, letting her feel just how much I agree. I'm not ashamed. She laughs and squirms beneath me, making it even harder to hide the proof of my excitement.

  "Declan!" She giggles again, trying to free her hands. "Let go! I'll scream... I swear I will!" She bucks and twists her hips, attempting to throw me over which makes me hold on tighter.

  "Liza, if no one came to the rescue when Seth was nailing your roommate to the wall, they won't come now." Staring down into her sparkling eyes, I plant a soft kiss at the corner of her mouth. "I'm the nice guy, remember?"

  "Maybe you shouldn't be so nice." Her words come out on a breath, her eyes suddenly serious. This time, when her hips rise to meet mine, she entices me, intentionally sliding down my length. My body responds instantly, ready and willing, just for her.

  I dare any guy to play nice with Liza Nichols under him.

  "Let me show you what nice guys can do." Releasing her, I run the backs of my fingers down her arm, causing her to shiver. Her eyes burn into me as her breathing hitches. I arch my eyebrow in question, silently asking for permission to continue. She nods. One small movement of the head, but it's all the encouragement I need.

  My hand continues its journey, down her side, to her hip, grazing the bare skin of her stomach. Through parted lips, she sucks in a sharp breath, her eyes fluttering closed. I take the opportunity to study her, to drink in the beauty of the girl who ran to me... and stayed.