GOVERNESS TO THE SHEIKH

by MARTIN, LAURA

  ‘Thank you, Daddy. That was the best day ever.’

  Malik realised he had never spent time with just one of his children before now; they’d always had to share his attention. He wondered whether it would be a good idea to try to carve out some time with each one of them, to make them feel special and show them they were loved.

  ‘You did a good thing today,’ Rachel said quietly as Malik began to take the saddle and bridle off the pony. He’d sent Hakim back to the palace to wash for lunch and apart from him and Rachel the stables were deserted.

  ‘I don’t know why I never thought to teach him to ride before.’

  Rachel took a brush and started to rub down the appreciative pony as Malik finished tidying away the riding equipment. They worked in silence for a few minutes, but there was a tension in the air, an electrical charge that fizzled and sparked between them.

  Malik glanced at Rachel, trying to figure out what made him so attracted to her. She was beautiful, with her thick, dark hair and warm brown eyes, and he longed to run his hands over the curves of her body. And she was kind and caring, towards him and towards his children. He respected her confidence and her positive attitude. But there was something else, something deep and primal, something he couldn’t describe or explain, that made him want to claim her as his own, to make sure no man ever looked at her ever again.

  Which was ridiculous. He had no right to claim her, no right to insist no man ever looked at her again. He couldn’t give her love and marriage. He’d tried to be a husband before and that had been an unmitigated disaster. As for love, he didn’t really believe in it. He believed in duty and honour, but he found it hard to believe in love. Aliyyah had believed in love and she had only years of heartache and an early death to show for it.

  Malik knew this meant he and Rachel could never be together, could never share even one more kiss. He respected her too much to ask her to be his mistress or his lover. He and his children needed her too much for him to even risk suggesting those things. But he wanted her, even though there was no way he could ever have her.

  Once the pony was rubbed down and the equipment stored away they walked out of the stable side by side, neither saying a word. Malik relished these few moments he got to spend just with Rachel, when it was just the two of them. They didn’t even need to speak for him to enjoy her company.

  ‘Meet me this evening,’ he said impulsively.

  Malik couldn’t quite believe he’d just uttered the invitation. He knew all the reasons he had to keep his distance from Rachel, he’d just recited them all again to himself inside his head, but still he found himself going against reason and finding excuses to spend time with her.

  Rachel turned to look at him, her expression wary.

  ‘I’ve got a surprise for you. Meet me at the entrance to the sunken garden once the children are in bed.’

  He realised he was holding his breath as he waited for her to reply.

  Rachel eventually nodded and Malik exhaled, not quite able to regret his spontaneous invitation, but knowing he would have to keep reciting all the reasons they could not be together over and over to remind himself not to lean in and kiss her.

  * * *

  ‘I wasn’t sure if you would come,’ Malik said as he led Rachel into the sunken garden.

  ‘I don’t think I had a choice,’ Rachel said quietly. Malik knew how she felt, he found it hard to say no to any situation that might bring them closer together.

  ‘I remember you telling me about some of the things you missed from back home,’ Malik said as they walked. ‘I wasn’t able to arrange everything, but I hope it is enough.’

  They emerged into a little courtyard that had a small table covered in mosaic pieces in the centre of it. Laid out on the table were a couple of cups, a pot of tea and two slices of fruit cake. For a moment Rachel stood frozen, not saying a word.

  ‘I’m sorry if it is not accurate,’ Malik said.

  Rachel turned to him with tears in her eyes. ‘This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.’

  Malik took her hand and led her over to the small table, pulling out her chair and waiting for her to sit before taking a seat himself. He watched as Rachel’s fingers danced across the bone china of the dainty cups and rested on the delicate handle of the silver forks set out for the fruit cake.

  ‘I remember my parents taking me for tea once in this cosy little teahouse in the middle of Brighton. We’d gone there for a day trip and I felt like the luckiest girl on earth.’

  ‘It’s difficult being away from home, apart from everyone you know,’ Malik said.

  Rachel picked up the teapot and poured two cups of the fragrant amber liquid, adding milk and stirring until she had got them just the right shade.

  ‘I know when I was studying in Europe I used to yearn for the deserts and the heat of Huria. Sometimes I felt that if I ate one more Western meal or drank one more cup of tea I might scream.’

  Rachel smiled at him, as if she were trying to picture him losing control but was unable to do so.

  ‘This is very kind of you. No one has ever done anything like this for me before.’

  Malik held her gaze and he knew right then something more was going to happen between them. They might currently be sitting having an innocuous cup of tea, but Rachel was looking at him as though he were the kindest and best man in the world, and Malik knew he wasn’t strong enough to resist her.

  They ate the cake and sipped their cups of tea, and when it was all gone Malik offered Rachel his arm and led her further into the sunken garden. He was very aware this was where they had shared their first kiss and he knew the entire garden was romantic at night. He wasn’t sure what he had hoped to achieve by setting out the table of tea, but after realising that Rachel was a little homesick he’d been determined to give her a little taste of home. Now he knew that small act was spiralling into something much more momentous.

  As they walked he glanced at Rachel’s profile, and wondered if he could just give in to his desires. He wanted to kiss her, to take her to his bed and claim her, but then he wanted to wake up the next morning with Rachel by his side, to have her smile at him as they discussed their days and their future. To him that sounded like a marriage and Malik knew he wasn’t ready for another one of those. He was still reeling from his disastrous marriage to Aliyyah and her awful death, and he didn’t need a further complication in his life. The problem was Rachel wasn’t the sort of woman he could just have a dalliance with. He liked her too much, respected her too much and he didn’t want to lose her because he couldn’t keep his desire in check.

  Malik felt the pressure building inside him. The situation was impossible. He wanted Rachel, but there was no way he could have her. And if he wasn’t very much mistaken she was falling for him, too. He’d seen the way she looked at him, noticed the warmth behind her smiles, and Malik knew he couldn’t give her what she wanted, what she deserved. A woman like Rachel needed to be loved completely and utterly, she deserved no less than a man’s entire heart. Malik couldn’t give her that, he wasn’t sure if he was capable of loving at all, and he wasn’t going to destroy Rachel the way Aliyyah had been destroyed and turn this happy contented woman sad with disappointment.

  They reached a little fountain and Rachel paused in front of it. In the moonlight she looked beautiful, with the soft light dancing across her features and making her eyes shine. Malik knew he had to kiss her, just one last time. He’d kiss her once more and then he would never touch her again. He knew it was an empty promise to himself, but he needed an excuse, any excuse, to dip his head and cover her lips with his own.

  Malik felt a surge of desire as Rachel tilted her head back and met his kiss with passion of her own. She laced her fingers through his hair and he felt her warm body pressing up against his. All his promises to himself, all his resolutions after their ki
ss in the desert, melted away and all he could think about was Rachel. He ran his hands over her arms, down her back, stopping to cup her bottom and pull her in even closer. He wanted to possess every part of her, to run his hands over every inch of her skin, to strip her of every item of clothing and see every bit of her in the moonlight.

  Rachel moaned softly and the sound cut through the haze of Malik’s desire and shook his very core. In that moment he wanted Rachel more than he wanted anything else. He could picture them running away together, spending their days lounging in bed and their nights locked in passionate embraces. In this fantasy Malik didn’t have a kingdom to think about, no responsibilities or cares. His life consisted of purely the woman in front of him and solely satisfying both their needs.

  He froze, then pulled away, looking at Rachel’s face searchingly, wondering how one woman could make him feel all of this. Then he felt the weight of responsibility come crashing back down and he realised just how dangerous his feelings for Rachel actually were. If one kiss could make him want to abandon his country, he dreaded to think what a night in her arms would do.

  ‘Malik, what’s wrong?’ Rachel asked softly, her face clouded with concern.

  He realised he was backing away from her, his hands held out protectively in front of him as if he were trying to ward off some evil spirit.

  ‘This is wrong,’ he managed to whisper. ‘Selfish.’

  In all his years as Sheikh of Huria Malik had never once complained about the responsibilities of the role, or how isolating his position was. Never before had he wanted to leave it all behind, to hand over the reins of power and live a normal life, but Rachel was making him yearn for something else: a life without the burden of a kingdom to put first.

  He couldn’t allow those thoughts to multiply and flourish. His duty was to Huria and he could not allow anything or anyone to change his priorities. Not even kind, caring Rachel with her soft lips and infectious smile. Malik was a Sheikh before he was a man and he knew he needed to start acting accordingly.

  Malik began to reach out, then let his hand fall to his side. If he weakened in his resolve it would only be Rachel who suffered in the long run. Better for their relationship to fizzle and fail now than for there to be more heartache further down the line.

  ‘I’m sorry,’ he said, and left the garden before he could see the expression of devastation that was sure to be on Rachel’s face.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Malik was avoiding her, Rachel was sure of it. There was no other explanation. In the last two weeks Rachel had seen the Sheikh for a total of five minutes. Whenever they bumped into one another he had to hurry off to some meeting or event and they hadn’t exchanged more than pleasantries since their kiss in the garden.

  Rachel was disappointed, of course, and she missed Malik’s company, but part of her could reason that the new distance he was keeping between them at least made it easier for her not to do or say something she might regret. Some days she even went for half an hour without thinking about the serious Sheikh, although other times she still found herself remembering their kisses far too often.

  What Rachel was really annoyed about was Malik’s regression with his children. He’d made so much progress with them and they’d begun to relax around him. Hakim had started to trust his father, Ameera had started to believe his confidence-boosting compliments and Aahil had just enjoyed spending time with the man he looked up to so much.

  That had been two weeks ago. Now the children saw their father as little as she did. Malik no longer came to tuck them into bed at night, he didn’t slip out of meetings to ask them what they were doing with their day. There had been no more trips out into the desert and no more lessons for Hakim. The children were devastated, and Rachel was furious. It was bad enough not interacting with your children in the first place, but to build that relationship only to desert them was heinous.

  Rachel had been bubbling with anger the last couple of days and she’d been eager to confront Malik and tell him in no uncertain terms that his behaviour was not good enough. The only problem was she hadn’t caught even a glimpse of him. She’d even resorted to teaching the children outside for the entire day, not leaving the courtyard and always keeping one eye fixed on the doors from the public rooms to the outside space, but still Malik had not appeared.

  ‘Do you think Father will give me another lesson tomorrow?’ Hakim asked as Rachel brushed the hair from his forehead.

  The young boy had asked the same question for almost a week and now Rachel sensed he was losing hope.

  ‘I’ll ask him,’ she said, bending down and placing a kiss on Hakim’s head.

  ‘Father’s too busy,’ Aahil said.

  Rachel heard the note of resignation in Aahil’s voice and she knew tonight would be the night she finally confronted Malik. Even if she had to break down the door of his private chamber herself, she was going to talk to the Sheikh.

  ‘I’ll ask him,’ Rachel repeated soothingly.

  She sat on the edge of Hakim’s bed until his breathing slowed and deepened and she was sure he was asleep, then she said goodnight to Aahil, blew out the candle and slipped from the room.

  Before setting out on her crusade Rachel returned to her own room to prepare herself. She checked her appearance in the mirror, straightening her dress and patting down her hair, checking that any stray strands were in place, and then she rolled back her shoulders and raised her chin a notch. This was a fight Malik was not going to win.

  Purposefully Rachel strode across the courtyard, heading straight for Malik’s private rooms. She had never been inside them, but she knew where most places were in the palace now and Malik’s rooms had a very distinctive, heavy set of doors leading to them.

  ‘The Sheikh has asked to see me, regarding the children,’ Rachel said to the guard standing outside the doors.

  He looked unsure, but he didn’t stop her as Rachel opened the door and slipped through. She made sure she closed it quietly behind her and for a second she didn’t move, allowing her eyes to adjust to the darkness in the corridor.

  Before her was a long, wide corridor, the walls whitewashed like the rest of the palace and the floor lined with exotic plants in mosaic pots. Along one side were the windows that looked out to the courtyard and on the other were three doors.

  Rachel gathered her confidence and walked forward. She didn’t know what lay behind the doors and she didn’t particularly want to surprise Malik in his bedroom, but her priority was finding the man. She wasn’t going to let the fact that these were his private rooms deter her. It was his fault that she was here, sneaking about after dark. If he’d made an appearance in daylight hours she wouldn’t have to resort to this.

  Rachel reached the first door, gripped the handle and pushed it open. She could see immediately it was his private study, a functional room with a large desk and maps of Huria on the walls. Rachel noticed the large portrait of a couple behind his desk and she wondered if the subjects of the painting were Malik’s parents.

  Seeing that the room was empty, Rachel quickly moved on. Behind the second door was Malik’s bedroom. It was large and richly decorated, with ornate furniture and luxurious fabrics draped over the bed and hanging in front of the windows. There was a comfortable sitting area, with plump cushions and inviting blankets, although Rachel doubted Malik got much time to relax. A door led off his bedroom to a private bathroom and Rachel could see the largest bath she had ever set eyes on standing in the middle of the room. She found her mouth becoming dry as she involuntarily pictured Malik sitting in the bath and pulling her in there to join him.

  Rachel swiftly retreated. She didn’t need any more fuel for her inappropriate thoughts about Malik and she didn’t want to pry into his private space, even though she was interested in what the enigmatic Sheikh did with his free time.

  Emerging back into the
corridor, Rachel carried on to the final door. She knew Malik was in his private set of rooms somewhere and, seeing that the other two rooms were empty, he must be behind this door. Summoning up all her confidence and righteous outrage, Rachel gripped the handle, then flung open the door.

  Malik was nowhere to be seen. In fact, there wasn’t even a room behind this door, just a corridor and a set of steps at the end of it. The entire corridor was tiled, even the ceiling, and there were recesses in the wall every few feet with candles set in them.

  Rachel hesitated for a moment, wondering what could be down the steps, not knowing whether to turn back or not, but then she heard Hakim’s hopeful voice in her head asking if Malik was going to give him another riding lesson and she stepped into the corridor.

  As she descended Rachel felt the air getting warmer, and she could hear a trickle of water coming from the room at the bottom of the steps. Slowly Rachel passed through an ornate archway and into a little chamber with a fountain in the middle of it. The water that was bubbling over the stone was clear and crisp and Rachel had the urge to dip her fingers in the little pool to cool herself down.

  Still, there was no sign of Malik. Rachel was now moving as if she were in a trance, being drawn forward by some invisible force. She knew she was invading Malik’s private space, but the anger inside her drove her on.

  The next room contained a small pool set into the floor and a stone bench around the edge. Rachel was just beginning to realise what this place was when she heard someone shifting in the next room. Summoning her courage, she stalked through the archway.

  Rachel froze. Malik was lying on a raised table in the middle of the room with his eyes closed. His entire body was naked except for a towel draped over his midsection. Rachel felt the heat begin to rise in her body as her eyes travelled over his broad chest, chiselled muscles and powerful thighs. She knew she should look away, knew she should quietly retreat, but she was mesmerised.