“I suppose,” Wyatt said, obviously taking Chase’s point.
“I’m not sure you should give up so easily,” Lucas said.
“Have you not been listening?” Chase’s voice rose. “She’s convinced herself that she loves me. She’ll commit to anything right now. It’s only later, after she realizes it was a mistake…” He wasn’t going to go through the logical all over again.
“He’s right,” Wyatt said.
“So we just give up?” Zane asked.
“Just so we’re clear,” Chase said, feeling dark amusement creeping in. “I’m breaking it off with your sister, not with you all.”
“We feel jilted all the same,” Lucas said.
“I am sorry about the ranch,” Chase said. “I think I would have liked being in business with you.”
“We would have liked it too,” Wyatt said.
*
At the Wildwood Café down the street from the motel, Riley dug into his pancakes while Maddy toyed with the omelet on her plate. Her son was an early riser, and she couldn’t help but think he might make a good rancher someday. Piper and Tristan’s room had been dark and quiet when Maddy left an hour ago. She hadn’t even glanced at Chase’s room. The less she let herself think about him, the better.
Wyatt startled her, appearing suddenly at the table. “Morning, little sister.”
Maddy felt a small lift in her mood. “Hi, Wyatt. I didn’t know you were still here.”
He pulled out a chair and sat down. “Hi there, Riley.”
“Hi, Uncle Wyatt. I’m having strawberry syrup.”
“That’s my favorite,” Wyatt said.
“It’s pink. Does it make my tongue pink?” Riley stuck out his tongue.
“Not while you’re eating, Riley,” Maddy warned.
“Sorry, Mommy.”
“He’s great,” Wyatt said to her.
“He is,” Maddy agreed.
“I heard what happened.”
Maddy mentally braced herself. “You talked to Eli?”
“And to Lucas and to Zane, and to Chase for that matter.”
Her stomach contracted at the sound of Chase’s name.
Wyatt flipped over the white stoneware coffee cup in front of him. “How much do you know about our plans for the Douglas Ranch?”
“Not much. Eli said something about Chase planning to buy it with you. But he seemed to think Chase would walk because Eli hit him.” She thought about stopping there. But she wouldn’t let herself take the coward’s way out. “Then again, me sleeping with Chase was probably the real problem.”
“It does complicate things,” Wyatt said with a wry smile.
“I’m glad you think this is funny.” Her eyes were starting to tingle.
His expression neutralized. “I don’t think it’s funny, Maddy. I’m really sorry you got hurt. But you’re a grown woman, and you made a choice, you took a chance. Sometimes these things work out, and sometimes they don’t.”
“How very philosophical of you.” Maddy would have appreciated a little more compassion. She took a sip of her coffee, struggling to stay tough in front of Wyatt.
The waitress came by, filled their coffee cups, and took his order for a five-star breakfast.
“What were the mathematical odds, Button?” he asked as the young woman walked away.
“The mathematical odds of what?”
“That Chase Garrett would wander into your life, be mistaken by Riley…” Wyatt glanced at his nephew and let the sentence hang. “Fall in love with you. You fall in love with him. And your family be magically put back together.”
She got his point. She didn’t like it, but she understood how he would think that. “I didn’t exactly do the math.”
“I believe the technical term is astronomical.”
“So what?”
“So, you can understand Chase’s skepticism.”
Maddy could feel the conversation taking a turn. Her guard went up. “What do you know about Chase’s skepticism?”
“He thinks you don’t really love him.”
“Well, he’s wrong.”
Wyatt gave a nod and took a sip of his coffee. “Let’s say he is.”
“He is.”
“I just accepted your premise, Maddy.”
She sat back in her chair, compressing her lips. Wyatt was supposed to be the smart, thoughtful brother. She couldn’t figure out why he was being so difficult.
“You love him,” Wyatt stated.
She did.
“So what do you want?”
That was a ridiculous question.
“Him,” she said.
“And what are you doing?”
Her growing frustration turned into sarcasm. “I’m eating breakfast.”
Wyatt looked at the omelet, hash browns, and fruit on her plate. “You’re not, but that’s not what I meant. What are you going to do about Chase?”
“I tried, Wyatt.” She lowered her voice. “I put it out there, and he threw it back in my face.”
“He doesn’t want to hurt you, and he doesn’t want to hurt Riley.”
“Well, that’s exactly what he’s doing.”
“I’m not hurt,” Riley said. “I’m rough and tough and hard to bluff.”
Despite everything, Maddy couldn’t stop a smile.
“Courtesy of Zane?” Wyatt asked.
“From Zane,” she confirmed. Riley was overly fond of quoting his uncle.
“You are tough,” Wyatt told Riley.
Riley had lost interest in his pancakes and was drawing on his place mat with the crayons provided by the restaurant.
“This is the white bull,” he said. “It has five spots.”
“That’s a good drawing,” Maddy told him, admiring his effort.
“You’re giving up?” Wyatt asked her.
“I didn’t go down easily,” she defended herself.
Wyatt’s expression turned thoughtful. “He seems like a really good guy.”
“He is a really good guy. He’s a great guy. He’s the guy I should have been with all along.”
Now Wyatt was watching her intently. “Tell me what that means.”
“It means I’m not replacing what I lost. It means I can tell the difference.” She felt a sense of righteousness well up inside her.
“The difference?”
“Yes. I know I love Chase Garrett, because I never loved…” She chose her words carefully in case Riley was listening. “Before.”
Wyatt broke into a smile.
“What?” She didn’t understand how that was amusing.
“Tell him that,” Wyatt said with conviction. “All of that. You know what you want, little sister. You know what you know. Take the bull by the horns and wrestle him to the ground already.”
“The bull by the horns?” She almost smiled at that.
“It seemed like an apt metaphor.” Wyatt gave a mock toast with his coffee cup. “Don’t let Chase make up your mind for you. Fight for what you want.”
“Now you sound like Eli.”
“I obviously don’t mean with your fists. Use your head, Button. You’ve always been smarter than the rest of us.”
“You’re the smart one,” she said. “I’m the pretty one.”
“You’re the compassionate one. But don’t be nice to Chase this time.”
She let Wyatt’s words sink in. And they did sink in.
The waitress arrived with his breakfast, and Maddy took a first bite of her omelet.
She didn’t know what she was going to do, and she sure didn’t know how she was going to do it. But she was going to fight for Chase, even if that meant fighting against him.
*
Chase had no intention of sticking around for the finals tonight. He’d finish his breakfast, track Riley down for a quick goodbye then get on the road for Tacoma. He’d ride next weekend come hell or high water.
He’d rehearsed an explanation to Riley. He’d tell him he was going bull riding and that he’d likel
y be gone for a long time. It wasn’t the perfect solution, but it was the best Chase could come up with right now. Any move he made beyond a speedy exit would only make things worse.
A shadow appeared across the outdoor patio table. He gave an inward sigh and raised his gaze, not ready to talk to anyone at all.
“Hi, Chase.”
“Patrick?” Chase was dumbfounded by the sight of his former friend.
“Can I talk to you?” There was hesitancy, even fear in Patrick’s voice.
He was smart to be afraid. He should have stayed far, far away from Chase, and he should have done that forever.
“No, you can’t talk to me,” Chase answered sharply, rising from his chair. He pulled out his wallet and tossed a couple of bills on the table.
“Chase,” Patrick pleaded.
“You lost the right to talk to me seven months ago.” Chase’s tone stayed hard as he strode for the sidewalk.
Patrick followed. “I’m only asking for a minute.”
“I don’t have a minute.”
“Seriously? I’ve come all the way from Twin River Valley, and you don’t have a minute to listen?”
Chase kept walking. “There is nothing you can say that I want to hear.”
“I came to say I’m sorry.”
Chase almost laughed out loud. Patrick thought an apology was going to make a difference?
“Chase, man, I’m going crazy here.”
“You’re going crazy? You stole me fiancée, my future, and you’re going crazy.” Chase increased his pace, heading along the sidewalk through the crowds of shoppers and tourists.
“That’s the thing,” Patrick said.
The traffic light in front of him turned red and Chase took an abrupt left turn, crossing the opposite street. He had no idea where he was going, and he didn’t care.
Patrick kept pace. “I wake up every morning, sick to my stomach, feeling guilty as hell for what I did.”
“Good.”
“I come home to my wife and my daughter, and all I can feel is terrible.”
“And you want absolution from me?”
Patrick felt terrible? How did he think Chase felt about it all?
And then the words hit him. A daughter?
“All these months, and I still can’t get past what I did,” Patrick continued.
At the mental image of a baby girl, something unexpectedly shifted inside Chase. Under any other circumstances, he’d be thrilled for Patrick. He’d be asking for pictures and smoking a cigar. He found his pace slowing down.
“I’m not looking for your forgiveness,” Patrick said, his tone going quieter.
Chase wanted to ask about the baby. He wanted to ask about Laura-Leigh.
“Every day,” Patrick said. “All I can think is that it should have been you. I stole your life, Chase. I had no right to steal your life.”
They were across the street now, in front of an ice cream parlor playing chirpy music.
Chase stopped and the crowds parted around them.
“The price was too high.” Patrick’s voice went hollow. “You paid it, and I had no right to make you do that.”
“It’s not my life,” Chase found himself saying.
Patrick seemed surprised that Chase had spoken. Then he looked puzzled.
“It’s not my life,” Chase repeated. It was suddenly crystal clear, and he wondered why it had taken him so long to figure it out.
Patrick wasn’t living Chase’s life. Patrick was living his own life that had happened at one point to include betraying his best friend. But Laura-Leigh had loved Patrick. It wasn’t her fault she loved him. It wasn’t Patrick’s fault he’d loved her back. And it sure wasn’t any fault of their innocent newborn baby girl.
Patrick was gaping at him in obvious confusion.
“You shouldn’t feel guilty,” Chase said, looking directly into Patrick’s eyes for the first time.
“Why?”
Patrick wasn’t living Chase’s life. The words boomed inside Chase’s brain.
An enormous weight seemed to lift from his shoulders. If Patrick wasn’t living Chase’s life, then maybe, just maybe, Chase wasn’t living Chase Barrett’s life either.
“What’s her name?” Chase asked Patrick.
“Who?” Patrick’s puzzlement seemed to be increasing.
“Your daughter. What’s your daughter’s name?”
“Elizabeth.”
“That’s nice,” Chase said with a smile.
“Uh, Chase?”
Chase clapped his friend on the shoulder. “You don’t need to feel guilty. I know you didn’t fall in love with Laura-Leigh to hurt me.”
“You know, I’d have given anything…” The emotional strain cracked Patrick’s voice.
“I know.” Chase now knew that was true.
Neither Patrick nor Laura-Leigh had set out to hurt him. He remembered their expressions on that terrible night. He’d been blinded by anger, but they’d both been devastated by how it had all played out.
He’d never truly loved Laura-Leigh. Not the way he loved Maddy. He loved Maddy beyond reason, eclipsing any feelings he’d ever had for anyone else.
And there was a chance Maddy felt the same about him. There was a chance she recognized it better than he did. If there was even the slightest chance, Chase was taking it.
He was suddenly impatient. He had to get going. Patrick was going to have to wait.
“Are they here?” he asked Patrick. “Laura-Leigh and Elizabeth? Did they come with you?”
“No.”
He took a half-step back towards the fairgrounds. “I’d love to see Laura-Leigh sometime and to meet Elizabeth. And you and I should sit down, have a drink. But not right now. Later? Tonight? Can you stay?”
Patrick broke into a smile. “Yes. I can stay.”
“There’s something I have to do.”
“Chase, I never…”
“I’m happy for you,” Chase said. “It was ugly, but it turned out right.”
“Thank you.” Patrick’s voice was thick as he stuck out his hand to shake.
Chase took it. Then he pulled Patrick into a hug. “It’s going to be fine. It’s going to be good.”
“Yeah?” Patrick gave a tight nod as the two men separated.
“Later,” said Chase as he moved away.
Right now he had to find Maddy. He’d done something incredibly stupid, and he was going to undo it or die trying.
Chapter Eleven
Chase had promised he’d say goodbye to Riley, and Maddy knew he’d never go back on his word. So Piper had hidden Riley away where Chase wouldn’t be able to find him.
Maybe Maddy was a bad mother for using her son that way. But it was the only advantage she had, the only surefire way of trying one more time to make Chase see reason before he disappeared from her life altogether.
She made her way across the fairgrounds past the bull enclosures, straining to see through the growing crowd on finals day. Chase hadn’t been in his motel room. That was the first place she’d checked. He wasn’t at any of the three closest cafés. And she’d done a complete lap of the fairgrounds without finding him.
She turned around now and was making her way in the opposite direction. The beer gardens were in front of her, but they were closed this early in the day. There was only a smattering of people at the pens, and the stands were empty. Most of the crowds were at the concession stands and exhibitors tents.
It was getting hot, and she was growing disheartened, wondering if she’d already missed her chance.
But then she spotted him, far away in the distance.
He was walking away from her, heading for the parking lot. It looked like he was leaving. Maybe, despite her best efforts, he’d already found Riley, said his goodbyes, and was about to drive away.
She broke into a run, past the food trucks and the barns, along the road that led to the parking lot. Her baby toe started to sting, and she cursed the cowboy boots that were also chafing h
er bare calves. They definitely weren’t made for running.
The sun grew hotter, and she started to sweat in her T-shirt.
“Chase!” she finally called as she grew closer.
He didn’t turn.
“Chase!” she called louder this time.
He turned, spotting her. “Maddy?” His expression turned to concern. “What’s wrong? Is it Riley?”
She shook her head, gasping for breath. “I… I…”
“You’re scaring me.”
“Nothing’s wrong,” she managed.
Well, a lot was wrong. But nothing new was wrong.
“Good.” He rested his hands on her shoulders. “We need to talk.”
“No,” she told him sharply, shaking him off. She wasn’t going through that again.
He’d had a chance to say his piece, and now it was her turn.
“Don’t talk,” she ordered him. “Just listen.”
“But—”
“It’s my turn now.” Her breathing was coming back under control. She searched her brain for a starting point, knowing how much was at stake. “You’ve met Wyatt, right? Well, he’s my smart brother. He’s cool, calm, and collected under just about any circumstance. It comes with being a pilot, I guess. But I just talked to him.”
Chase looked puzzled, but thankfully stayed quiet.
Maddy was procrastinating, but she was afraid to take the plunge. This was her last chance, and she didn’t want to blow this. She forced herself to push ahead. “I told him I was in love with you.”
Chase opened his mouth.
She clapped her hand over it. “No. Still my turn.”
He heaved a sigh, but gave a nod.
“Thing is.” She relaxed. The urgency drained out of her. Her hand relaxed on his mouth. “Thing is, Chase. I never loved my husband.”
Chase’s eyes widened.
“I was pregnant, and he took responsibility. He married me, and we tried really hard to make it work. For Riley. We both loved Riley. But he was away a lot. And there were women. I know there were women. And I guess I can understand it. I mean, our sex life was never that great. And we didn’t have all that much to talk about. I got frustrated, and he stayed away even more.”
For a split-second, she thought back to those lonely days, when she wondered if that would be her fate for her entire life. “And then he was killed. I was sad, of course. I liked him. But it was strange. People thought I was something I wasn’t. They thought I was a devastated, heartbroken, grieving widow. It was more like losing a friend. And it was so sad for Riley. Don’t get me wrong, Riley worshipped his daddy, and he missed him terribly. And I wouldn’t wish that on any child.”
Chase (American Extreme Bull Riders Tour Book 2) Page 17