by S. J. McCoy
~ ~ ~
Kenzie put her purse in the back office and checked the notes Ben had left for her. She was pleased that he felt comfortable enough to leave things up to her now. They worked well together and she'd noticed that he was even starting to relax and take a little time for himself, instead of being constantly present in the bar and restaurant. Tonight she knew he'd gone over to see Megan and Michael. Missy and Dan were there, too. She loved the way the whole gang hung out together so much and there were so many different combinations that all worked so well together. She felt most comfortable with Laura and Smoke, but, when she thought about it, she enjoyed spending time with any and all of them. She spotted Emma and Jack sitting outside on the deck having a drink. It was apparent to anyone with eyes in their head that those two were deeply in love. They'd been married a while now it seemed, but Jack still held Emma's hand and looked into her eyes while he talked to her. Kenzie had believed that all that stuff went out the window when you got married.
“Can I get a Jack and Coke?”
She turned to see Robin pulling up a seat at the bar. She still wasn't sure what to make of him. He and Chase were close and had been for years, but she sensed that Robin had some kind of issue with her. Hoping she'd be able to avoid whatever problem he had, she smiled brightly. “Coming right up.”
When she placed it in front of him, he held her gaze for a moment. He seemed to be telling her something with his eyes, but she had no idea what it might be. She stared back at him. “What?”
He shook his head. “Nothing.”
Fair enough. It seemed he was one of those good-looking moody guys who wanted people to pay him attention and try to draw him out on what he might be thinking. Kenzie wasn't interested enough, and she had customers to take care of anyway. She turned away to take care of a couple who had just settled at the end of the bar.
The next time she looked over to check on Robin's drink, he was glaring at her. If looks could kill...! She needed to find out what his problem was. “Are you ready for another?” she asked.
He nodded and slid his glass back across the bar, still giving her the evil eye.
“Do you have a problem with me, Robin?”
He smiled and shook his head though his eyes told a different story. “Whatever gives you that idea, lover?”
That made her catch her breath. She'd grown used to Chase calling her that. It wasn't right coming from Robin. Was he messing with her by using Chase's name for her—or was it something they both called any and all of the women they picked up? She tried to pull herself together while she fixed his drink then turned back to him with a shrug. “I don't know. Maybe it's the way you keep giving me the evil eye?” She smiled as she said it, but they both knew it wasn't genuine.
“I keep giving you the eye, but it's not evil.”
Wow! What was he saying? He and Chase were the best of friends, she thought. He wasn't trying to make a move on her was he?
She fixed him with a stony glare. “Whatever you're playing at Robin, give it up.”
He smiled. “For years now, what I've been playing is bass in a band. I don't want to give it up, but you are fucking everything up.”
“What do you mean?” She couldn't believe this!
“I mean. You've got Chase's head all fucked up. The band wants out of this town, but he won't go because of you. He wants to stay here and play house with you. But we both know how ridiculous that is, don't we? You'll tire of him, you'll want to go back to your old ways. You can have any guy you want and you'll go back to that. I just want Chase to realize it before he splits the band up for you.”
Kenzie stared at him. “What do you mean, the band wants out?”
“We've been offered a gig on the cruise ships, but he won't go because of you. You're not just screwing him over, you're screwing all of us over.”
Chase hadn't mentioned anything about leaving, anything about a cruise ship. Why not? She didn't know what to say.
Robin held her gaze and knocked back his drink. “You're not the kind of girl who can stick with just one man. You're bound to screw up. Why don't you do everybody a favor and admit that now instead of stringing him along until it's too late?”
Kenzie checked that there were no customers in earshot then lowered her voice anyway. “Fuck you, Robin! I'm not stringing him along. I'm in love with him if you must know. He makes his own decisions. If he doesn't want to leave, he doesn't want to leave. That's not up to me, or you. What Chase does is Chase's choice. Don't go trying to paint me as the bad guy, and don't you dare try to tell me what I am.” Damn him, he had no right to talk to her like that!
Robin smiled. “What's up, lover? Touch a nerve did I?”
She scowled at him. Had he? Why hadn't Chase said anything to her? She knew what had bothered her most—you're bound to screw up. They were the words, that was the thought that haunted her all the time. She loved Chase, she loved what they had together, but she was afraid of screwing it up. Robin didn't even know her, and yet for some reason he thought she would screw it up too. Was that just who she was? Was it so obvious? All she could do was shake her head at him before going to take care of other customers. By the time she turned back to him, his stool was empty. He'd gone, but he'd left her with a whole heap of doubts and uncertainties. She wanted to talk to Chase, ask him what the deal was with cruise ships and the band wanting to leave. What would it mean?
Fortunately, the bar was busy for a weeknight. A few locals had taken up their usual spots and there were quite a few drop-ins who came for a drink while they waited for take-out orders to be ready. It wasn't busy enough to keep her mind off Robin and his words though. The whole conversation had unsettled her, but the part about her being bound to screw up was gnawing away at her. He'd only voiced what she'd believed about herself—but why had he had to do it when she was trying to overcome that?
“I'm surprised to be the only one of the band at the bar tonight.”
She whirled around to stare at Eddie. Had he come to give her grief just like Robin had?
“Whoa!” He held a hand up. “Sorry. I just thought Chase would be here hanging out with you. He usually is when you're working.”
“And do you have a problem with that, too?”
He looked taken aback. “What's up, Kenzie? I think the two of you are great together. And what do you mean, do I have a problem with it, too? Who else does?”
She let out a deep breath. “Sorry. I guess I'm just a little stressed right now. What can I get you?”
“I'll take a Bud, thanks.” He fixed her with a worried look. “But are you going to tell me what's up?”
“Nothing, nothing at all.” She reached into the fridge to get his beer and placed it in front of him. “If you'll excuse me.” She worked her way down the bar, even though no one needed anything right now.
When she came back to Eddie's spot, he was still giving her that same worried look. “Has Robin been giving you a hard time?”
She shrugged.
“Ignore him Kenzie, he's just a big kid who's used to getting his own way. Don't worry about it.”
“I can see that, but what worries me is that he's talking about the band going to play on some ship and Chase hasn't said a word about it to me.”
“Probably because he doesn't want to go.”
“But Robin said that I'm screwing all of you over!”
Eddie let out a laugh. “Robin is full of shit. It's got nothing to do with you. I don't want to play the cruise ships, Chase doesn't—and wouldn't even if he hadn't met you. Robin wants to and wants us all to go because his life is easier when Chase and I do most of the heavy lifting. If we go our separate ways, he'll have to do a lot more work and so will the other two. He'd rather things stay the way they are. Things are changing anyway, it's not your fault. Robin just likes to have someone to blame. You need to ignore him.”
Kenzie thought about it. It made sense. “But what will happen if the other three wa
nt to go? Will you and Chase stay here?”
Eddie nodded. “We'd like to, but we need to talk to Ben about that, whether he would want just the two of us.”
“And if he doesn't?”
Eddie shrugged. “We haven't gotten that far yet, but I wouldn't worry about it if I were you. Chase isn't going anywhere. He wants to be here.” He gave her a reassuring smile. “With you.”
Despite Eddie's smile, Kenzie wasn't happy. She really didn't want Chase to give anything up for her. She didn't want to somehow mess everything up for him. He loved singing, he loved the band. Now she was worried that somehow she was going to screw up and hurt Chase in the process.
Eddie seemed to read her thoughts. “Seriously, don't worry about it. Chase is big enough to make his own decisions. He's been happier than I've ever seen him since he met you. Robin is acting like a big kid who's determined to get his own way. Ignore him.”
She nodded, grateful for what he was trying to do, but still unconvinced about what she should do.
Eddie grinned at her. “Besides, if worst comes to worst and the guys want to leave and Ben wants a band, not a duo, then you can sing with us.”
Oh, hell no! In trying to make her feel better, he couldn't have said anything that would make her feel worse.
Chapter Twenty-one
Chase brought the truck to a stop and smiled over at Kenzie. “We'll turn you into a country girl yet.”
He loved the way her eyes shone as she smiled back at him. “I don't think so. You know what they say, you can take the girl out of the city, but you can't take the city out of the girl.”
No matter what she said, she looked like she belonged out here in the hills above the lake. It was a beautiful day again and he'd persuaded her to come out here with him for the afternoon before they headed into work later. “Do you miss the city?”
She frowned at him. “What do you think?”
He thought about that god-awful motel where she'd been living and shuddered. “I don't see why you would, but you still keep making little comments about not belonging here.” He got out of the truck and waited for her to join him.
She came around and took his hand and they started walking. “I don't miss a thing. I have everything I could ever want right here.” She smiled up at him and squeezed his hand. “I'm starting to believe, starting to relax and enjoy it just like you said.”
He narrowed his eyes at her, he could tell there was a but coming. “And despite all of that, something's not right is it?”
“How can you tell?”
He shrugged. “I know you too well.”
That raised a small smile, but it didn't chase the concern from her eyes.
“What's wrong, lover? Something's been bugging you for a couple of days now.”
She nodded. “Cruise ships.”
How did she know about that? He hadn't wanted to her to worry about it, hadn't wanted her to see it as her cue to leave him before he might leave and hurt her. He stopped walking and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “What about them?”
“Why aren't you going?”
“Because I hate the idea of spending the summer trapped on a floating hotel.”
She gave a little laugh. “I can see that, but what about the band?”
“What about the band, and why are you asking?”
She shrugged. “Because I don't want to get in the way of what you want to do, I don't want to mess things up for you.”
“You are what I want to do. This is where I want to be, here with you.”
“Why didn't you tell me about it?”
“Because I never had any intention of doing it. Who did tell you about it?” She shrugged and started walking again. The look on her face told him there was more that she wasn't saying. He caught up to her and put a hand on her shoulder. “Tell me.”
She shrugged again.
“Come on, Kenzie. Something's bothering you. Talk to me.” She had that hard look again. He knew that was dangerous and she was closing him out. He knew her well enough now though to understand that it was because she didn't want to get hurt, not because she was the hard-ass she pretended to be. He stopped walking and tugged on her hand. “I'm not going anywhere until my little cutie tells me what's upsetting her.”
She shook her head at him. “I've told you before I am not a cutie, and I am not upset.”
“So tell me then.”
She let out a big sigh. “Eddie told me I shouldn't let it get to me, but Robin said I was screwing you all over.”
Chase felt the anger bubble up. What the hell was Robin's problem? He'd been weird about Kenzie from the get-go, but this was taking it too far. “Eddie was right. You can't let Robin get to you. He's a good guy really, but he only knows how to look out for number one. He wants what he wants and doesn't like anyone who gets in his way.”
“I can see that, but he said some things that made me think. I don't want to mess things up for you.”
“You're not messing anything up.” He pulled her to him. “You make everything better. You have to believe that.”
She stared up at him. “I'd like to, but what if Robin and the others decide to go, and Ben wants a full band? What will you do then?”
Chase shrugged. He was pretty sure Ben would be good with it, but he hadn't had the chance to talk to him yet. He'd wanted to get that detail cleared up before he told Kenzie. “We'll work something out.”
“What if I wasn't around, would you go then?”
“No! I told you, I hate cruise ships, I don't want to play them.” He looked deep into her eyes. “And don't you go thinking that you can use this as an excuse to run out on me. I can tell you're thinking about it, but I'm not buying it. If you leave it's not about doing the honorable thing and getting out of my way, so don't try to kid yourself—or me. If you leave, it's because you want to because you're scared. I'll understand if you do, but just remember that I love you. Be honest with me, and with yourself, okay?” He knew he was taking a big risk, but it had to be said. She was turning things around in her mind so she could feel justified in leaving, he wasn't about to let her twist it all up and then run. “Besides, if you run out on me now you'd be running out on Ethan, and on Ben too, not to mention Megan and all the friends you've made here. They all want you to stay.”
She rolled her eyes at him. “Now you're playing dirty, using little kids and responsibility against me?”
He grinned. “I'll do whatever it takes to get you to stay. I love you with all my heart. I know you love me a little bit, but I figure if I remind you how much other people love you and need you too, it can't hurt my cause.”
She smiled back. “I love you more than a little bit.”
“You do?”
She nodded and looped her arms up around his neck.
He closed his hands around her ass. “How much more?”
“A whole lot more.”
He bent his head to her and gently nipped her bottom lip. “Want to tell me how much?”
She shook her head and rubbed her hips against his. Her fingers came up to tangle in his hair. “No, but maybe I can show you.”
That had him aching for her. He squeezed her ass and pressed his hard-on against her. “You can?”
She nodded and led him a little further along the path. When they reached a stand of trees, she sat down on the grass and held her arms up to him. The air went rushing out of his lungs again. How was he supposed to say no to her?
She seemed to think he might though. She lay back in the grass and stroked her hands over her full breasts. “You don't have to if you don't want to.”
He was already unbuckling his jeans and joining her on the ground. He ran his hand up her thigh and felt his balls tighten when his fingers found wetness, she had no panties on under that dress!
She smiled as she pulled his head down to hers. “I didn't want anything to come between us.”
He grinned and pushed his pants down,
he couldn't wait. It seemed she couldn't either as she helped him push them down then pulled him on top of her, spreading her legs and clutching at his ass. He was inside her in one deep thrust and damn did she feel good. She felt good, and she looked just perfect out here in the fresh air, the sun shining down on her as she moved with him. The gentle breeze carrying her gasps away as he thrust deep and hard. This was going to be quick, every stroke took him closer to the edge. The thrill of being outside like this heightened his desire and it seemed to be doing the same for her. She brought her legs up and wrapped them around his back. That was all it took. With a few more deep thrusts, she tightened around him, taking him with her as she screamed his name. He came hard, his hips thrusting mercilessly as she gasped and writhed under him. Damn she was good.
They lay breathing hard together for a long while afterward. Eventually, he lifted his head and looked down into her eyes. “You love me that much?”
She smiled and nodded. “That much and more.”
“Will you show me how much you love me every day?”
She laughed. “Do you think you can handle it?”
“I'll die trying.”
She smiled. “If I'm going to stick around then you'd better not go and die on me.”
He shook his head, serious now. “I don't intend to.”
“Good.”
When they'd put themselves back together, they walked on a little farther.
“Is it okay if Ethan comes over for an hour tomorrow?”
She looked up at him surprised. “Of course, it is.”
He grinned. “I saw Michael this morning and he asked me. Apparently the kid is eager for another guitar lesson. He wants to learn a full song to play so he can hear his Auntie Kenzie sing.”
She frowned but said nothing.
“Surely you'll sing for the little guy?”
She nodded. “I suppose.”
He knew he kept pushing the singing deal, but he had it fixed in his head somehow that if she could get over that, she'd get over everything else, too. “You went to Nashville to sing, you sang in front of people all the time there, why is it any different here?” He thought he knew the answer, but he wanted her to think about it—and to say it out loud.