The Hypnotist

by Laurence Anholt

  21

  The Man with Six Fingers

  It was the easiest induction I’d ever performed.

  I timed it on my watch, and later, when I checked my notebook, I found it had taken less than three minutes to put Pip under. There was a tricky moment when he seemed to be reliving some awful event. He started screaming and shaking so violently, I thought he must be back with the Klan at the red barn . . . But no, it was the train crash he was re-living. The terrible accident that had torn his world apart. Regression is a subtle business and not for the inexperienced – I pulled him back very quickly, but I made a note that there was extensive work to be done.

  What an imagination that boy had! I could tell that he was smelling every smell and experiencing every texture and colour in his trance world. I wasn’t exactly sure what he thought he had discovered in the cookie jar concealed beneath the bridge, but when he emerged from trance he was like a different fellow – relaxed, and happy and confident.

  Now, before you say anything, I want to assure you that I thought very carefully about performing an induction on a lad of Pip’s age. It’s not something I would normally do without parental consent, but I had seen how anxious the boy was and I’d noticed the nervous habit he had developed of repeatedly touching the tender skin of his neck.

  When I was sure he was steady on his feet, I sent Pip and Hannah on their way, and as I watched them walking calmly across the track to Dead River Farm I was pleased to see that they were holding hands. No one can prevent suffering in this world, but how much easier it can be with a friend at your side.

  I was certainly mindful of the risk Erwin presented to Pip. I’d dealt with all kinds in my work, I can tell you, and I know that humans are not killers by nature. Most of us do not wish death or pain on even our worst enemy. But then again, there is a tiny number who have something wonky with their wiring. These people have no empathy at all. As few as one per cent of the population may be psychopaths, but an infinitesimally smaller number will simply kill for fun. I was beginning to suspect that Erwin was one of these.

  In spite of that, I was fairly confident from what Pip had told me about their recent encounters that my hypnotic commands were holding and Erwin would not harm the boy . . . What I had foolishly failed to consider was the threat he presented to Hannah.

  That evening I went to talk to Zachery. Checking first that Erwin’s Jeep was not in the yard, I wandered around until I discovered a stream of engine oil and curses oozing from beneath the brown truck.

  I called out, ‘Mr Zachery, it’s Jack – Jack Morrow. I’d like a word.’

  I stood and waited until several tools were tossed out and Zachery emerged. With much coughing and swearing, he hauled himself upright, wiping his oily hands on his overalls. He spat on the ground and relit his cigarette. ‘Wassa matter? Ye growed taired o’ teachin’?’

  ‘No. Not at all. I love our lessons. And I don’t know if you’ve noticed how much their language skills are improving . . .’

  ‘Oh yeah, the gull don’ never quit tawkin’ . . .’

  ‘No, she’s not talking, that’s true. But have you seen her written work? I think she may be really musical too. And Pip is a very bright fellow. I reckon he’s now almost where he would be if he had stayed in school . . .’

  ‘Waste o’ taime, laike ah seed.’

  ‘Well, you’re entitled to your opinion and I hope you’ll respect mine. Anyway, I’m here to ask your permission for something. You remember the letter you received from the education authorities about your obligation to provide an education . . .?’

  ‘Th’ one ah used t’ waipe mah ass?’

  ‘Well, if you’d read it, you’d have learned that every child is entitled to a certain amount of holiday too. A little break from time to time. It’s a legal requirement.’

  ‘Oh yeah, ah’ll get raight on an’ book their vacation in Florida . . . Li’l hotel wi’ a swimmin’ pool . . .’

  ‘That’s not what I meant.’

  ‘A cuppla weeks croosin’ on an ocean liner, suit ’em jes’ faine.’

  ‘Of course not. It won’t cost a cent. My idea is that I would take them away for a few days. I’ll act as their guardian and take full responsibility. What do you say now?’

  ‘Ah say no.’

  ‘Well, in that case you shouldn’t be surprised if you get a visit from the state authorities . . .’

  ‘Listen, Doc – Jock – whatever yer thunderin’ name is. Who in tarnation’s gonna cook mah meals an’ look after Lilybelle while you spoilin’ them kids? Who gonna spoil me?’

  ‘I’m sure you can manage for a while . . .’

  Zachery slammed the bonnet of his truck and discharged a jet of mucus from one nostril, which I took to be a sign of agreement.

  Our expedition was becoming a reality, and as I drove to my appointment with Professor Cerberus at the university the following day, I reminded myself to mention that I was owed some holiday time, and I planned to see a little more of this huge and beautiful country.

  I entered the campus between water sprinklers hissing on the grassy hill and parked the Spider. As I strolled beside the glass windows of the labs, I could see my students engaged in all kinds of fascinating experiments. It was indeed a new dawn in psychology, and I began to think about finding new lodgings away from all that madness, so that I could focus on my work and the bright opportunities the university offered me. Surely the Klan belonged to ancient history like Dead River Farm itself.

  I rode the lift to the second floor and marched along the air-conditioned corridors. As I approached the Vice Principal’s office, I heard the familiar woodpecker sound of dozens of busy typewriters. You people of today take computers for granted, but at that time every institution employed a pool of typists, shorthand secretaries and clerks to maintain the complex paper filing systems. Everything was done by hand.

  The proud inscription on the door read:

  PROFESSOR W. M. CERBERUS JR., PH. D

  VICE PRINCIPAL

  I knocked and waited, and I was conscious of dozens of pairs of heavily mascaraed eyes watching me. I knew I was still something of a curiosity.

  Walter Cerberus flung the door wide, grinning at me in a slightly superior way. He was a small man of about my height; around fifty, I would guess, with a little round belly, a yellow bow tie and suede shoes.

  ‘Ah, Dr Morrow . . . Jack, if I may. We meet at last. Step right on in. Welcome to Mission Control!’

  His handshake was warm enough, but there was something a little irregular about his grip, which I couldn’t quite identify.

  ‘What can I get you, Jack? Brandy? Coffee?’

  ‘A coffee would be grand.’

  He went to his huge desk and flicked a switch on the intercom. Then I realized what was odd about his handshake – the man had an extra digit on his right hand. How very peculiar! Walter Cerberus had six fingers – so that was why the students called him Professor Pinkie!

  ‘Can we get two coffees, Marian?’

  ‘Right away, Professor,’ answered the machine.

  He was one of those fellows who shouts rather than talks. He waved me towards an over-designed chair and I glanced somewhat enviously around the big modern office – impressive bookshelves, a set of golf clubs in a corner, huge windows overlooking the campus and expensive modern art on the walls.

  ‘Now, Jack, would you like me to tell you how delighted I am, out of ten?’

  ‘Well . . .’

  ‘Ten, Jack – no, wait, fifteen! That’s how delighted! Your little hypnosis show was Out. Of. This. World!’

  ‘I’m glad you were happy, Professor.’

  ‘Happy? Jack, the show was Broadway Gold! The spotlights, the dreamy voice, the guy in the ice tub – that boy should get an Oscar! The part where he thinks he’s in a desert and starts perspiring . . . Oh my Lord! Let me tell you, Jack, every person in that theatre was fooled!’

  ‘Well, now, there was no acting—’

  ‘Sure, J
ack! You keep your magic tricks to yourself! Who can blame you? All I can say is that my group of VIPs couldn’t stop talking about it all day long . . . Classic, Jack! Classic! Ah, here’s the coffee – just set it right here, Marian.’

  His secretary placed a tray on a low table, smiling dazzlingly all the while. Cerberus’s eyes followed her slim legs out of the door.

  ‘Now, I’m hearing a lot of good things about your department, Jack. You folks in Neurology are teaching us all some interesting lessons . . . Sugar? Cream?’

  ‘Er, just a little milk. That’s plenty . . . Well, we couldn’t do it without your support, Professor.’

  ‘Call me Walter.’

  The professor strolled to the window and gazed like a little fat god at the campus below.

  ‘We all enjoy having you here, Jack. It’s no secret that I’ve got your name in my PPP file – that’s Possible Promotion People! If we can tick a few final boxes, we’ll be moving ahead with that before the new semester. Now, my wife Doreen and I are involved in all kinds of charitable work in the town. Doreen is forever organizing barbecues and fund-raising events and we’d like to have you along. Spread a little of the old Celtic charm!’

  ‘Well, that’s awfully kind of you, Professor.’

  ‘Walter. Think nothing of it. Some of the events are real family affairs, and then there’s golf and other activities which are . . . kinda men only! Doreen and I have always felt it’s healthy to separate some parts of our lives and . . . well, Jack, there’s only so many Tupperware parties a man can stand!’

  ‘Ha! I’m sure that’s true.’

  Cerberus handed me a cup and saucer.

  ‘In the meantime I have a favour to ask – a university matter – and that’s why I invited you here this morning . . . By the way, did I mention that Doreen and I took our honeymoon in Ireland back in ’forty-nine? Didn’t stop raining for a month.’

  ‘Ah, yes, that’s why they call it the Emerald Isle—’

  ‘Here’s the situation, Jack – I have to go away for a few days to a conference in North Carolina and I need a reliable man to take the helm.’

  ‘Well, I—’

  ‘I want you to move right here into my office, Jack, so you can keep an eye on things. You’ll have Marian and the whole team at your disposal.’

  ‘That’s an incredible honour, Professor . . . Walter.’

  ‘No problem. That’s the way it works here, Jack. Like I said before – we stick together . . . look out for one another – you know what I’m saying? You’ll be my deputy sheriff for a few days! Could lead on to big things.’

  I pictured myself in that oak-panelled office, with the bookshelves and the modern art. Maybe I’d have a little knock about with the office golf set, and I’m ashamed to tell you, I imagined calling home from behind the big desk – Ma would never believe it!

  ‘Thank you, Walter. I’d be absolutely delighted!’

  ‘Well, that’s wonderful!’ he shouted and whacked me so hard on the back that my coffee went flying.

  ‘Oh, my! I’m sorry ’bout that, Jack! Just got carried away. Here, let me . . . No – look, the restroom is right through there – why don’t you wipe that before it stains?’

  Professor Cerberus had a bathroom attached to his office, exactly as you’d imagine – lots of white marble and gleaming sanitary ware. I dabbed at the stain on my shirt as best I could, then reached for what I took for a towel hanging on the back of the door. What I saw made my blood run cold! It was not a towel – it was the lynched body of a man!

  No. No, that’s not correct. It was not a corpse hanging on the back of the door, but it might as well have been. What I saw hanging from a hook in the Vice Principal’s bathroom was a pointed hood and white robe, embroidered with the distinctive blood-drop cross of the Ku Klux Klan! There was even a pair of long white gloves folded neatly on a hanger. With a shudder, I realized that the gloves had been specially made with an extra finger on one hand.

  It was a full five minutes before I ceased trembling and my heartbeat returned to near normal. I washed and dried my face and flushed the toilet. There was no other way out – I turned the handle and stepped back into his office.

  ‘Thought y’all had got stuck down the john! Your coffee’s cold now, Jack. I’ll send for some more. Wait a minute – you don’t look too good. Man, you look like you seen a ghost! Oh . . . Oh, OK I get it. Did you see something hanging on my bathroom door, Jack?’

  ‘Professor, I have to leave now. I have a seminar to attend—’

  ‘Wait a minute. Sit down, Jack . . .’

  ‘Thank you, sir, I’d like to stay but—’

  ‘Sit down. That’s an order. OK, you saw the robes. As a matter of fact this is one of the things I wanted to speak to you about. My guess is you’ve picked up a lot of liberal civil rights propaganda about the Klan. I’d like to redress the balance a little. See, the Klan is a very old institution here in America. All the VIPs who came with me to your lecture were Klansmen. We do a lot of charity work and we give big donations to the church. It’s a kind of fund-raising group, if you like, and we have a lot of fun in the process.’

  I was seething with fear and fury.

  ‘Professor Cerberus, let’s not beat about the bush. The KKK is a racist organization that has been clearly linked to some outrageous crimes.’

  ‘Oh, I get it. You’ve been talking to the student union and you’ve been taken in by all their Commie hooey. Listen, I’m an educated man, Jack, same as you. But I’m a History Major, so maybe I know a little more about this than you do. It may surprise you to know that the Klan started as a kind of university fraternity. It has a long and noble tradition. Why, the very name Ku Klux Klan comes from the Greek kuklos, which means a circle or band. Look at me, Jack. Do I look like a thug? Do you think I would get involved in breaking the law? The law is on our side – we are the law. The Klan is not racist – we’re not anti-Black, no siree, we’re just pro-White. Do you see the difference? I have fought to have Black students enrolled right here at the university. Many of them are excellent sportsmen. The conference I’m headed to in North Carolina will be exclusively for Klan academics, and I can assure you that many of them share my belief that some Coloured folk have nearly the same intellectual ability—’

  ‘Professor! There is not one Black student amongst nearly a thousand Caucasian students at this university. The only non-Whites are cleaners and kitchen staff.’

  ‘Not yet, Jack. Not yet. But things are changing. I’m all for change, but it don’t happen overnight. I mean, there’s this whole Women’s Lib thing going on too, and we are trying to accommodate that. We have many women in senior positions. Take a look at Marian – she don’t just make coffee, you know.’

  ‘I’m sorry, Professor—’

  ‘Walter, call me Walter.’

  ‘I’m sorry, Walter, but I find the KKK very, very disturbing—’

  ‘Ignorance, Jack. That’s just ignorance. You’re a man of science, so it surprises me that you jump to conclusions without getting your facts straight. A lot of people fear what they don’t know. My father was a Klansman, and his father before him, so I grew up with it. It’s a family affair. We have good old barbecues and musical evenings. Why, we even have women members now, and kids – you wouldn’t believe how cute they look in their little robes! Sure there has been some bad press – a few loose cannons maybe – but I tell you, the Klan is a force for good. It’s a place for young people to feel they belong. You’re young and you have a great deal of potential, Jack, so if you play your cards right, who knows where you might end up down the line. I’ll give you an example: right now the Klan has the youngest County Leader in our history – just nineteen years of age and he’s got a very strong following indeed. This boy ain’t educated like you and me, Jack, but he was amongst the first of our boys in ’Nam. Believe me, he picked up some very valuable skills out there, and a flair for leadership – I mean, zeal and fervour. I personally checked him out thoroughly, and
I recognized a young man with potential . . . just like you, Jack. So the Brotherhood got behind him, and now, well, there’s no stopping him . . . Lives up your end of town, I believe. Dead River – ain’t that where you reside?’

  Grotesque nausea rolled in my stomach.

  ‘See, you choose to live in our country, Jack, and you gotta learn to do things the way we do. When in Rome and all that. I’d like y’all to come along to just one meeting – meet a few of the boys and have a nice homey evening. If you don’t like it, well, no one can say you didn’t try, and you can go home to Ireland saying you had a new experience and broadened your mind. If you do like it – well, I promise there are people here who can help you leap up the promotion ladder . . . like Jack up the Beanstalk, ha, ha, ha! We can really make things happen for you. You understand what I’m saying?’

  ‘You’re saying that if I don’t agree to join the Klan, my job is in jeopardy?’

  ‘Well, I wouldn’t put it quite like that. You make it sound almost like blackmail. But let’s agree on a compromise: you take the helm while I’m in North Carolina, just like we said. That will give y’all time to think things over. I’ve got some Klan literature right here in my desk that I’d like you to digest. See, here’s some pamphlets, and this book is what we call the Kloran – it’s our bible of abiding principles. Ain’t nothing to frighten the horses, Jack. When I return, we’ll have another leisurely chat, and if you have any queries, I’ll be glad to answer them for you. How’s that sound?’

  ‘I . . . I’ll think it all over. But . . . but I wanted to ask you . . . to tell you . . . I’m due some leave, so I plan to get away . . .’

  ‘Sure. Take a few days’ vacation and get yourself set to take over the Big Desk when you return. And if you need anything, you just click the intercom and one of my little genies will appear at your side.’

  ‘Thank you.’

  ‘Come on, let me see that Irish smile . . . Oh, Danny boy . . .’

  I forced a sickly smile onto my face and backed towards the door. I felt a migraine coming on and this loathsome man just wouldn’t stop babbling.