Decline and Fall of Alternative Civilization

by G S Oldman

  ~ ~ ~

  In the hours before their S & D show June was a giddy wreck. She wasn't used to feeling so good about life, herself or the looming sense of accomplishment. It was something that no one, neither fucked-up family, death, deceit, divorce, nor any strip minings of fate could take away from her. Mostly, she hit it off well with their host and wished she could've met him long ago. Save for the fact that he had a girlfriend, they were definitely of a kindred bent. As she primped and fussed over herself, Dedra stepped into the bathroom and said, "June, I can't remember when I've ever seen you like this."

  "What on earth do you mean?"

  "Look at you. You've tried on three different outfits and four shades of lipstick."

  "Uh, uh?yeah?"

  "This isn't like you, y'know."

  "Uh, uh, uh, but?I wanna look right when I'm up there."

  "Settle down. Everything will be fine."

  "Uh, uh, but, uh?"

  "Could it be my Junie's in love?"

  "Uh, uh, what?"

  "I see how you are when you're with your man." Dedra brightly waggled her eyebrows. "All googly googy."

  "My man? What man? What are you talking about?"

  "It's pretty cute, actually," she giggled.

  "De, what the hell are you on about?"

  "You can really be a clueless twit sometimes." She grabbed June by the arm and dragged her away from the mirror. "C'mere. We need to talk."

  "But, but?" The big lass protested to no avail and was soon standing in the backyard.

  "C'mon, June. I know you like Doug. It's soooo obvious."

  "Dedra! Of course I like him but you're reading too much into it. He has a goddam girlfriend. I'm not stupid about these things."

  "Ooooh, yes you are."

  "I am not. He's a big time muckety-muck. I'm a measly nobody. I have no chance with him."

  "You have more of a chance than you think."

  "Oh? You know something I don't, Ms. Busybody?"

  "Maybe." Dedra smiled.

  "Wwwwwwwell?tell me."

  "I know he likes you. A lot."

  "Oh geeezzz. Stop it. He has a girlfriend, for chrissakes. Right?"

  "Well, yeah, but that might not mean much."

  "De, I'm gonna strangle you if don't tell me."

  "Listen, June, I'm not sure how much stock you can put into it. It's just my gut feeling, but we had a talk the other night and he was asking alllll about you."

  "Omigod. Really?"

  "Uh huh. And I mean reallllly." She grinned. June's mouth dropped open. "He does have a girlfriend but I get the distinct impression that they're mmmmmaybe on the outs with each other?"

  "Oooh?my?god. You should not have told me that."

  "Why?"

  "Because I'm already a nervous wreck about the show tonight." She pressed her hand onto her heart and said, "It's our first real show here and it's a big thing to me and I want it to be good and we've gone through so much to get here and who would've even thought that rank bozos like us could?could?even qualify for something like this and?and I'm so damn scared."

  June fell to the ground and sat, head held in her shaky hands. Woozy, she took in a deep breath and moaned.

  "Hey, you'll be OK." Dedra knelt next to her. "I'm scared too. Bryan and Prez were acting a little prissy about it too. You're in damn fine company, honey." She laughed and hugged the owl-eyed bass player. "We've all had a bit too much party the past couple of days. Have you eaten today?"

  "No. Not enough."

  "Let's take care of that." Tightly embracing her, she whispered, "You know I love you, Junie. Always will. But I think Mr. Muckety-Muck, as you call him, is a bit taken with you. I think you should find out."

  "Oh geeezzz. Can it wait til after the show?"

  "Nuh uh, you gotta walk in there right now and ask him."

  June screamed.

  "Nonono, I was just kidding. You need to eat." Dedra pulled her friend up from the ground. "C'mon, I'll fix you a sandwich. We got food in there, y'know. Then we gotta go downtown and kick some holy ass!"

  XXI

  "If I were human, I believe my response

  would be: 'Go to hell!'

  If I were human."

  -Mr. Spock

  Ahh, el Camelot de la Musica!

  The Song & Dance show was a triumph. Not the holy fire that was Flagstaff, but playing third on the bill, Faux Toppa's performance was admirable, almost tight. Aside from a collective case of nerves, nothing went horribly wrong beyond a bogus guitar cable and some tuning problems. It was a good, attentive crowd. The men proved their knightly skills and the fair maidens were grateful. There was a backstage keg of opening-night prayers and friendly relaxation to follow, and it was plain they made a good impression upon the local jousters. June fought back tears until they secured their equipment offstage, then she let loose on Bryan. "I'm sorry I'm such a crybaby but you have no idea how good I feel right now."

  He put an arm around her and laughed. "Aha! I shoulda known you'd fall apart on me eventually."

  "No, Bryan, you don't understand."

  "Oh, c'mon, I do understand. We all gotta start somewhere. I've already been where you are right now."

  "But I bet you didn't act like a weepy little girl about it."

  "You'd be surprised. Any guy saying he's never been scared to get on stage is a lyin' sonofabitch. I mean, at some level we're all weepy little girls."

  "Oh, stop it, Bryan."

  "No, really. That's why we do it-to get in touch with our weepy little girl sides." Without warning, he launched a massive tickle attack on her ribcage.

  "NOoo! Stop it!" Trying to break free, she fell to her knees. "I'll have to kill you if you don't let me go!"

  "Hey, y'all. Hope I'm not interrupting." It was Doug.

  "Interrupt! Interrupt!"

  "Hahahaha!" The master tickler released his victim. "Just administering some therapy."

  "I hate you, Bryan!" She stood up, making a lunge from which her assailant rapidly fled.

  "The family that plays together?" Doug smiled broadly. "Hey, June, I'd say you guys did pretty good tonight."

  "Aw, shit. We, uh, coulda played a bit better."

  "Oh, quit being so self-critical. You guys raised a few local eyebrows, I'd say. Good job."

  "Well, thanks for coming to the show." Her cheeks turned a deep red.

  "Yeah, I try to stay away from this hubbub but the S&D guys are friends of mine. Gave me a chance to at least say hi and catch up with 'em." A slim, stylishly self-assured blonde waltzed up next to him and grabbed his elbow. "Oh, June, this is my friend Angela. I'm sure you've heard me complain about her." He chuckled.

  "Uh huh." The woman rolled her eyes and dryly said, "Nice to meet you."

  "Hi. I've heard good things about you too." June grinned diplomatically.

  "Are you about ready?" Angela narrowed eyes at the bass player, then focused on Doug.

  "Eh, got some plans. We gotta go. Maybe I'll see y'all at the ranch later if none of us gets too crazy," he said in a rapid sidestep, pulling the blonde away.

  "OK, bye." June watched the couple disappear. A slicing twinge of something made her fists clench and she wrung her hands, muttering, "oh, geeezzzz?"

  Toward the end of the night was a commotion between the S&D guys and an older, authoritative "Dude" that prevented the last band from starting on time. That the gentleman seemed to have muscle with him didn't bode well. The band launched into their set after the delay and the dude/muscle contingent exited, all angry frowns. The show plowed onward under a stubborn air of gloom.

  "Some SXSW guy tried to shut us down," Dedra told her bandmates at the bar.

  "What? How?"

  "I didn't get the whole story but it was the head event coordinator or something like that. Apparently, he's really pissed at S&D for pulling out of their regular showcase and doing this on their own."

  "You gotta be kidding," sa
id Bryan.

  "Nuh uh. I was walking by and I kinda eavesdropped. He threatened to call out the fire marshal."

  "That sucks." Prez wrinkled his nose.

  "I was looking right at him when he said that. He gave me this nasty eyeball and I got a real creepy feeling from it too." She shuddered and ordered a shot of Maker's. "Guy struck me as a real jerk. Who else wants a shot?"

  Later, braving the roiling post-show crowd at Maggie Nolan's, they lucked out and got a booth. June gasped, "Oh shit. I don't believe it."

  "What is it?" asked Dedra.

  "I swear, we gotta order this." On the late-night menu was a SXSW Special that called itself "The Marshall Stack." A plate of not just three, but four-count 'em- four huge pancakes.

  Her bandmates' mouths gaped open and eyes widened. Spontaneously, they all cried and high-fived. "And four plates!"