Dev Haskell Box Set 8-14 (Dev Haskell - Private Investigator)

by Mike Faricy

  I couldn’t really tell, and gave a quick glance as she bounced her breasts up and down. “If you need a paper towel, there’s some over by the sink,” I said, then went back to scratching Morton behind the ear. AJ seemed to hesitate for a long moment before she strutted over to the sink and tore off a paper towel. I took the dog food bag and filled Morton’s food dish. He suddenly looked disappointed.

  “Do you have any hand cream?” AJ asked a few minutes later. She was bent over looking in the cabinet under the kitchen sink. As I turned to look at her, she glanced at me over her shoulder and smiled with her perfect bum up in the air. Her tight black dress had risen up an inch or so and just barely exposed the hint of a silky black thong.

  I gave her a brief glance, then rubbed Morton some more. “Come on, Morton, you must be starving.”

  “Hand cream?”

  I glanced over at AJ again. She was still bent over only now her entire rear was exposed. The thong ran up her backside to where three little sparkling jewels connected with the waistband. I caught just a glimpse of a lacy tattoo running across the small of her back.

  “Oh yeah, it’s not down there. It’s in that white thing with the push top, right along the back of the sink. Come on, Morton. Don’t you like the dog food? You’ve got to eat. Come on. Here, try this piece.”

  “So, ahh, any chance on getting that night cap?”

  “What? Sure thing, sorry about that. You can just help yourself. I got hard liquor out in the dining room, help yourself to whatever’s in the cabinet with the crystal decanters. White wines are in the fridge, or if you want red I think there’s a bottle in the dining room. It’s got a twist off cap.”

  “Thanks,” she said. In retrospect, I don’t think she really meant it.

  Morton ignored the dog food in his dish. I tried for a couple of minutes to hand feed it to him, coaxing him one nugget at a time; but he wasn’t having any of that action. “Okay, okay, you big baby. But, only because it’s your first night, sort of a welcome home treat,” I said, then opened the Styrofoam container and placed the remainder of the steak in his dish just as AJ walked back into the kitchen with a glass of dark brown liquid.

  “Did you make me one?” I asked.

  She glared just as the doorbell rang.

  Morton barked and headed toward the front door.

  “Who the hell is ringing my doorbell this late at night?”

  “It’s for me, I called a taxi,” she said and took a big sip, sort of shuddered, then set the glass down on the kitchen counter and strutted toward the front door.

  “Whoa, AJ. Wait up, wait up,” I called and hurried after her.

  “It’s certainly been memorable. Sorry to interrupt your little boys’ reunion. Nice to meet you, Morton,” she said.

  He hopped off the couch, then shoved his nose in between her legs. She half jumped, then grabbed the back of his head and thrust it back under her skirt. “Oh, God, really cold nose. Well, Dev, I can promise you, he’s getting a lot more than you will. Enjoy your night, boys,” she said then slammed the door behind her.

  “Hey, hey wait, AJ, AJ,” I called. Morton jumped back and forth in front of me and by the time I got to the door and opened it, the taxi was pulling away from the curb. I watched until the taillights faded up the street then walked back to the kitchen and dumped the bag with Morton’s toys onto the floor. A little handwritten note floated onto the floor.

  “Hi, hope all is well. This just isn’t working out. Turns out Buster has an allergy to dogs. I figured you wouldn’t mind, besides he likes you, I think. Maddie”

  Chapter Two

  I was sitting in my office chair staring through a set of binoculars, alternating between the working girls waiting for the bus down on the corner and two girls getting dressed in the third floor apartment across the street. In between times, I was thinking of Morton and then wondering how I could get back into AJ’s good graces.

  I suppose she was right to be pissed off, but I’d been so happy to see him. I was wondering if I could somehow give her the impression I was really a caring, sensitive guy and my sensitive side got in the way of taking care of her needs…scratch that. Maybe if I just sort of suggested the caring, sensitive part and…

  “Hey, you’re in early. I didn’t expect to see you until around noon. So how’d the big night go, take any pictures?” Louie asked. He’s a pal, my attorney, my officemate and half crazy. He tossed his computer bag on his picnic table desk, then emptied what was left in the coffee pot into his giant three-cup mooch mug. “Don’t spare any of the details,” he said setting his mug on the edge of my desk then holding his hand out for the binoculars.

  “Not much to tell,” I said handing the binoculars over to him.

  “Come on, it was the third date. Didn’t you take her to that restaurant near your place? I thought you said it was a sure thing? She tell you she was married or something?” He said then proceeded to focus the binoculars on the apartment across the street.

  “No, a surprise visitor, actually?”

  “What the hell time is it? God, they’re already dressed,” he groaned and handed back the binoculars.

  “Yeah, they must have an early meeting or something, I think they’re a good half-hour ahead of their normal schedule.”

  “Let me guess. It’s either a boyfriend or she’s into other girls, right? Oh wait, the husband called, right?”

  “No, wrong, wrong and double wrong. Actually, the dinner went great. So great that we skipped dessert, raced to my place, the kisses were coming hot and heavy. We pull up in front of my place and there he is, on the front porch.”

  “Who?”

  “Morton.”

  “That dog? The one that knocked up that fancy French poodle show dog?”

  “Yeah, Princess Anastasia. He was tied to the front door, along with his bed, a couple of bags of dog food, and his dog toys. Turns out the idiot that Maddie linked up with down in Atlanta has an allergy or something. So she put Morton in the car, drove up here and left him on my front porch along with a thank-you note.”

  “You’re kidding?”

  “No, dead serious. Anyway, AJ got all pissed off and well, I don’t know, maybe she just doesn’t like the idea of me having a dog.”

  “Wait a minute. Didn’t you tell me she has a dog, a candy something?”

  “A chocolate lab, actually. Yeah, so I’m not really sure why she went off the deep end. I’m getting Morton settled, and the next thing I know she’s heading out the door without so much as a good night kiss. Go figure.”

  “Doesn’t sound like the woman you’ve described to me. You sure you didn’t say something or do…?”

  “No, like I said, she just left.”

  “Strange, so where is Morton?”

  “I left him at home, he…”

  “Didn’t he, you know, chew everything up and trash the place last time you left him there?”

  “Yeah, but I’m thinking he might be a little more mature now. Besides I’ve got him confined in the kitchen.

  “Wasn’t that the room he trashed?”

  “Well, yeah, come to think of it.” I glanced out the window, the bus had just pulled back into traffic and was heading down the street carrying its lovely cargo toward downtown. The living room light was off in the third floor apartment across the street so I tossed the binoculars back on the desk.

  “I hope you know what you’re doing,” Louie said.

  “I think they went to work.”

  “I meant your lady friend. Sounds like you screwed up.”

  “I’ll give AJ a call, maybe give her a day or so to calm down first.”

  “You really want to pursue that? Sounds like it could end up being a lot of work.”

  “I think maybe Morton’s arrival sort of threw her off course or something. It’ll work out. If it doesn’t I’ll give Heidi a call.”

  “That sounds a little more promising,” Louie said.

  “Heidi’s a good friend, but she seems to onl
y be able to take me in little doses.”

  “You ever think that might have something to do with your lifestyle?”

  Chapter Three

  Over the next couple of days, I left no less than three voicemails for AJ and she hadn’t responded to a single one. So, I phoned Heidi.

  “Hey, Heidi, how are things going?”

  “I’m not bailing you out if that’s why you’re calling.”

  “Why do you always say that? When was the last time I needed bail money?”

  “That’s not the point. I’m just not doing it anymore, that’s all I’m saying.”

  “Are we crabby today?”

  “Why did you call?”

  “Are you okay?”

  “Yes.”

  I’d gone this far, so I figured I might as well continue. “Well, it’s been a while since I saw you, since we were together. I just thought it might be nice to grab a bite to eat, you know catch up and…”

  “And then you could ply me with wine or margaritas or something and I’d hop into bed with you. Is that it?”

  This wasn’t going the way I’d planned. “No, I just wanted to see how you were, make sure everything was okay, that’s all. Hey, if you don’t want to get together, okay, fine. I just thought it might be nice to see you and…”

  “We can meet, but let’s not make it your place.”

  “Okay, should I just bring dinner? I could pick up…”

  “No, some place public. A restaurant might be nice.”

  I began an internal debate about hanging up.

  “Are you still there?” she asked.

  “Yes, just trying to think of a restaurant.”

  “Geno’s, I could maybe use some Italian.”

  “Tonight works for me if you can make it,” I said, then hoped she might be busy.

  “Say, seven-thirty?” she said.

  “Sure. I’ll pick you up and…”

  “I’ll drive myself if it’s all the same.”

  “I’ll see you there around seven-thirty. I’ll call for a reservation; I know how you hate to wait.”

  “That would be nice,” she said, then hung up.

  I didn’t know what, but something was wrong. I’d just lined up a dinner date where I’d have the pleasure of dropping a good chunk of change and spending the evening with a very unhappy individual. I could hardly wait.

  * * *

  True to my word I made the reservation for seven-thirty, then waited until a little after eight before Heidi finally showed up. I stood as she breezed around the corner. She half-dodged my attempt to give her a kiss, turning her head so I’d plant the kiss on her cheek. Then she pulled away at the last second and sat down while I sort of kissed the air.

  “Have you been waiting long?” she said, then stared at the bottle of wine that was now two glasses shy.

  “Only since seven-thirty.”

  “Oh,” she said, making it sound like forty minutes wasn’t such a bad thing.

  “How about some wine?” I said raising the bottle toward her glass.

  “No, none for me.”

  “No wine?”

  “I just told you, no.”

  “Hey, Heidi, I haven’t seen you for at least three weeks. I think we know each other well enough that we can level with one another. So what’s going on, what’s wrong?”

  “Why does something have to be wrong? Just because I don’t want a glass of wine doesn’t mean…”

  “This isn’t about the wine, I don’t care about that because it just means there’s more for me. But your attitude… you were barely civil on the phone this morning. You’re almost forty-five minutes late, no text, no phone call…”

  “And no dinner date,” she said, pushed her chair back, stood, and walked out of the restaurant.

  I sat there by myself for ten minutes, hoping she’d come back. She didn’t. I was beginning to wonder if it was me? First AJ, now Heidi who was usually open to just about anything.

  “Would you care for an appetizer?” the waiter asked, sounding like he already knew my response. Fittingly, he was dressed for a funeral in a black button down shirt, black trousers and a long black apron.

  “I think just the check, please.”

  He reached into a deep apron pocket and handed me the black book with my check already prepared. As he walked away, I pulled a couple of twenties out of my wallet, tossed them on the table and left.

  Chapter Four

  I’d been leering at the girls in the apartment across the street through my binoculars. The blonde was wearing a black thong and bra, the dark haired girl just had a white towel wrapped around her. From what I could tell they both seemed to be talking nonstop while putting on their makeup and sipping coffee at the kitchen counter. Multitasking.

  “Haskell Investigations” I answered, then picked up the binoculars again.

  “Hi, Dev.”

  “Heidi, hi, how are you doing?”

  “I just wanted to apologize for the other night. I didn’t mean to walk out. It’s just been kind of stressful lately.”

  “Everything okay?”

  “Yeah, I think so. I’m calling because I want to be honest with you. I should have told you the other night, not really sure why I didn’t.”

  “You okay?”

  “I’ve met someone.”

  Shit. “Heidi, that’s great. I’m really happy for you.”

  “You’re not mad?”

  I’d tossed the binoculars on my desk, spun around in my chair and was reaching for a pen. “No, no I’m very happy for you. Tell me a little about him,” I said thinking I’d like to go and smash his car windows.

  “Well, we met at a business luncheon. He’s an attorney, practices here in town. He helps the handicapped, looks out for their needs.”

  “Helps the handicapped? Like what, he’s a crossing guard on a busy street or he holds the door open?”

  “Very funny. No, he takes legal action on behalf of people with disabilities. You know, making sure buildings, retail shops and things like that are in compliance with the law.”

  “Wow, an upstanding guy. Sounds like I probably don’t have a chance. What’s his name?”

  “Austin, Austin Hackett. He’s originally from Chicago, but he’s been practicing up here for fourteen or fifteen years.”

  “Interesting,” I said writing down the bastard’s name on a bar coaster advertising Two Hearted Ale. “What firm is he with?”

  “He has a private practice. Say, you’re not thinking of poking around and making his life miserable are you? That’s not why I called. If you think…”

  “Hey, calm down. I’m not going to poke around, as you say. I was just curious, I know a lot of legal beagles in a number of different firms. I thought I may have run into him before, that’s all.”

  “I don’t think he spends much time in the sort of places you go, Dev. No offense, but, well, he doesn’t mingle with criminals.”

  “Good for him,” I said. “So, how long have you been seeing each other?” The last time I’d spent the night with Heidi had been over a month ago.

  “Oh, we’ve been together for a good three weeks,” she said making it sound like it had been three years. If memory served, Heidi’s relationships usually tanked right around week four. I reached over for my desk calendar, flipped the pages seven days ahead then penned her name in and added a question mark behind it.

  “Heidi, I’m really happy for you. I’d love to meet him sometime,” I lied.

  “You know, that might not be such a good idea.”

  “Oh?”

  “Well, we wanted to be completely honest with one another and one night we just, you know, told each other about all our past relationships and things.”

  I couldn’t believe Heidi told this guy about all her past relationships, there wasn’t enough time in the day. Three weeks? God, she’d still be unloading. She must have skipped an awful lot.

  “What about him?”

  “Actually, I’m his first. He
was always so busy. He took care of his sick parents. Then, once they passed away he became a Navy Seal. He went to law school and when he graduated at the top of his class he decided to dedicate himself to helping others in honor of his parents.”

  Heidi is one of, if not the sharpest business woman I know. She’s made enough money to never really have to worry about money anymore. That said, if she’s got a weak spot, it has to do with romantic interests feeding her a line. The bigger the line the more readily she seems to believe it.

  “Wow, he sounds like a really great guy. No wonder you fell in love with him, and he’d be crazy not to go after you.” The jerk. “How ‘bout we get together, a celebration in honor of you two finding one another?”

  “You’re not mad?”

  “Well, I’d love it if he hadn’t found you, but I’m happy for you, Heidi. Really, I am. You pick the place and I’ll pay for dinner.”

  “You’re sure? You don’t have to, you know.”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  “And I’m not going to bed with you, Dev. I just want to have dinner and then we’ll go our separate ways at the end, okay?”

  “Yeah, I get it, believe me. Just a little celebration. I’m really happy for you, honey, honest.”

  “Okay, let me think of a place and I’ll just send you a text. What night works for you?”

  “You name the night and I’ll cancel whatever I have going.” The only thing I had on my calendar was a note that The Spot bar was doing two for one night on Thursday.

  “You’re sweet. Thanks for not being all mad and going crazy.”

  “Heidi, you’ve just become the one who got away. It’s my loss, but I’m really happy for you.”

  Chapter Five

  Louie stepped into the office just as I slammed down the phone.

  “Whoa, take it easy. You’ll break that thing into a hundred different pieces. Someone coming after you with a paternity suit?”

  “No. God the way things are going there’s no chance of that happening in the foreseeable future. Hey, you ever hear of a guy practicing named Austin Hackett? I guess he does some sort of disability work.”