Ellenessia's Curse Book 1: The Shadow's Seer

by Fran Jacobs

  I blinked, just staring at her. What a strange question. Why would I not want to change this? I didn't know how much of me, or the Shadow Seer prophecies, Talira knew. She may not know that I would go mad, that my visions were to be of death and destruction, but she knew that I would be locked in a cell and crying. How could she think that I would not want to change that? But then, she had blinded herself just to see her visions better. Were visions really that special, that amazing, that it was worth losing everything just to have them? It didn't seem possible.

  But Talira's face, beneath the purple gauze, was curious. This woman really had no idea why I wouldn't want this to happen to me. "I don't want to be a seer and I don't want to end up in that cell, even for a little while! I want none of this to have happened." I reached out and took her arm. "People are trying to kill me because of what they think I am. I just want to be myself and --

  A hard hand closed around my shoulder suddenly, squeezing me so tightly that I cried out. My cry panicked Talira and she started to rise to her feet. "Sit down," Trellany barked at her. "Not you," she snapped at me. "You get up, boy, and go upstairs."

  "Boy?" I snapped. "Excuse me?"

  "You heard me," Trellany snapped back. "Go upstairs."

  I got to my feet and she folded her arms across her chest. The look in her eyes was fierce. "You're not to speak to me that way," I said very softly.

  "I will speak to you anyway that I see fit," Trellany replied. "Now go upstairs, unless you want me to drag you up there by your hair." The look in her eyes told me that she would do it, too, so I turned and went upstairs, stomping my boots on the wooden floor, a nonverbal expression of my anger. My face was red with embarrassment at being spoken to that way. Had we been so long out of Carnia Castle that she could forget who I was and how she was supposed to talk to me? She had no right to tell me what to do, no right at all!

  I slammed the door to the room that I shared with Teveriel and he came awake with a gasp. "Huh." He sat up startled, then he focused on me. "You!" he said. Then he flopped back down on his pillow. "The big-footed apprentice bard now slams doors."

  "Trellany ordered me up here," I snapped. "She bloody ordered me!"

  "I'm sure she had good reason," Teveriel said sleepily. "And I'm sure you're going to tell me why she didn't."

  "I was just talking to someone," I snapped, and started to pace through our small bedroom, the same loose floorboard creaking each time I passed over it. "And Trellany was furious at me! She ordered me to come up here, called me 'boy'! I swear she has forgotten who I am or, maybe, she has lost her mind completely!"

  "I doubt both of those things," Teveriel said. He sighed and sat up. He gave a weary stretch, swung his bare legs over the edge of the bed and ran his fingers through his hair until it stuck up in wild tuffs. "Explain it to me," he said. "Tell me exactly what you were saying to this person. As it's obvious that you aren't going to let me get any more sleep, you might as well keep me informed."

  I stopped pacing and looked at him. His hair was a rumpled mess, there were bags under his eyes, he was pale and exhausted. He'd been kept up most of the night, playing until his fingers cramped again for those three guests, who had ridden out just after breakfast, wide awake and full of high spirits.

  I sat down hard on my bed. "I'm sorry," I said. "I forgot how tired you were."

  "It's fine," Teveriel said, and stifled a yawn. "Just tell me what went on."

  "I was just talking to this woman," I said, "and Trellany appeared and ordered me up here."

  "Talking to her about what?" Teveriel asked.

  "Um." I hesitated, staring down at my booted feet. "About being a seer."

  Teveriel drew his breath in with a sudden gasp. "Never mind Trellany, have you lost your mind?" he demanded. "Candale, you know that people are trying to kill you because they think you're this Shadow Seer. What are you doing talking to a complete stranger in a public tavern about this?"

  "She's a prophet," I protested. "She's blind and she said that she'd dreamed of me."

  "Anyone can say that, Candale." Teveriel shook his head with dismay. "Honestly! I'm surprised all Trellany did was order you up here. I'm surprised she didn't belt you one for your foolishness. Candale, you have to be more careful."

  "She's a prophet," I repeated. "She called me the Shadow Seer and said she had dreams of me and of you and Trellany. She even called Trellany the fiery-haired warrior, as you did. Well she said that there was a warrior with hair the colour of fire. That's the same thing."

  "Really?" He raised an eyebrow at me, looking suddenly very interested. He leaned forward toward me, his face very earnest, but I got the impression that he was mocking me, somehow, not taking this seriously at all. The look on his face was almost too serious, as though it was part of his joke, to be pretending to believe this, as I really did. "What did she call me?"

  "The bard," I said softly.

  "Just 'the bard'?" Teveriel laughed and then I knew that he was just joking. I felt a flash of hurt and I swallowed it back. "How is that fair? Trellany is a fiery haired warrior and I'm just a bard."

  "It's what you are," I said. "Don't mock me, Tev. Talira knew about us and that means she might have known more of what is to happen to me. I don't think it's something that should be laughed at."

  Teveriel sighed and his faced softened. "Candale, I'm sorry," he said sincerely. "I don't mean to mock you, I just can't believe that you believed her so quickly. Anyone could wrap some cloth around their eyes and pretend to be blind. The fact that she knows about me, and Trellany, doesn't prove anything. It was never a secret that Trellany was appointed to be your bodyguard or that I'm your friend."

  "No ... but she knew that I broke my arm as a child-"

  "Who doesn't? Candale, you're an heir to the Carnian Throne. When you fell from your horse and broke your arm, everyone knew about it! The word spread like wild-fire. I doubt there is a man or woman in this kingdom who didn't hear about the accident and who wasn't worried about your recovery."

  "But how could she know that I was Prince Candale, to have known that that had happened to me? We're in disguise."

  "That black wispy beard of yours wouldn't trick anyone who knew to look for you, Candale."

  "But no one knows to look for me. No one knows where we are!"

  Teveriel shook his head. "We can't actually be sure of that. There may have been more spies from the Order in the castle before we left, who were aware of your visits to the library or what happened when you went to ask Prince Gerian's permission to leave for White Oaks, who could then put together what was going on. Then, when we disappeared, it wouldn't have taken much for them to work out where we were going and why, no matter what story Prince Gerian has put around to explain your absence. And, with it pissing down outside, it would have been more likely now, than before, that we would stop in a tavern along the way. It wouldn't have been hard for someone to find us here, Candale."

  My mouth twisted as I realised that he was right, that Talira hadn't told me anything that would have been particularly hard for a person to find out, certainly nothing that was proof of her prophetical powers. Not even calling me the Seer could be taken as proof. If she was from the Order, she would have known I had those suspicions about myself. Why else would I be on the road to White Oaks?

  Gods, I was such an idiot! Any intelligent man, who knew their life was at risk, would become a little paranoid and would be glad to have a bodyguard with them. They would be wary of strangers, who seemed to know them, and wouldn't believe them at face value when they explained that this was because they were a prophet. I was clearly far from intelligent because I resented needing a bodyguard and tried to carry on with my life the way I had before I had learnt that I needed one, with no thought to the consequences at all.

  I groaned and dropped my head into my hands. "I am so stupid," I muttered into my fingers.

  "You'll get no arguments about that from me," Teveriel said. He leaned over to awkwardly pat my shoulde
r. "But I do understand. It can't be easy to not know who to trust, to not know what is really going on in your own life ..."

  "It must be even harder trying to be my friend, or my bodyguard, when I go and do stupid things like this that could threaten us all. I just got carried away. I thought she could tell me more about myself, or what the visions might be like. I never thought she might not be what she said she was. Lykeia taught me nothing, it seems."

  "You were just carried away, Dale. You believe you're this Shadow Seer. It's understandable that you'd want to know more about it and ask questions of someone who might know. Trellany will understand that."

  It was the first time he had ever shortened my name like that, although he had long ago dropped the use of my title, before I had even suggested it. Having my name shortened meant a lot to me. I liked knowing that he felt comfortable enough with me that he could do that and it made me feel a little better about the situation. Even though I had been an idiot, possibly put his life at risk if Talira was associated with the Order, Teveriel was still my friend and would stand by me.

  But then I realised what he had said and I lifted my head from my hands to look at him. "You didn't say I was carried away because I am the Seer and want to know more, you said I was carried away because I believe I am."

  "Yes ..." Teveriel said, and there was no mistaking the note of discomfort in his voice.

  "What ... what does that mean?" I demanded. "Why do you just know that I believe it? Why don't you believe it as well?" There was no answer. I swallowed. "Tev, I-I never asked you this, I never asked you what you thought about the book in the library, or the child leaving bruises on my hands ... but you do believe me, don't you? You do believe that I'm the Shadow Seer?"

  There was a pause that seemed to stretch on far too long, and the longer it went on, the more uncomfortable I became. Finally Teveriel shrugged his shoulders half-heartedly. "I ... I don't know what I believe, Dale," he said.

  I could only stare at him in complete surprise. I had asked the question because I had needed reassurance, not because I had any reason to doubt him. Now it appeared that I did have reason to doubt him, because he didn't believe I was a prophet any more than he believed Talira was!

  "I ... I just find it all a bit coincidental, the Shadow Seer stuff happening now and that child visiting you in your dreams ... I just don't know, Dale. Maybe you aren't the Seer, maybe there is more to it ..."

  I didn't wait for him to finish his sentence. I got to my feet and headed towards the door. I didn't want to hear this. It was bad enough that my father doubted me, I couldn't cope with Teveriel doubting me as well, nor could I stand to listen to his reasons why he didn't believe I was the Seer, when I knew that I was, that there was no other explanation for any of this.

  Teveriel reached out and made a desperate grab, catching the hem of my tunic, and held fast. I tried to pull free but his grip was strong and he held so tightly his knuckles turned white. I was afraid he would rip my tunic so I stopped trying to pull away and just stood there looking at him. When Teveriel realised I wasn't going to fight, he sighed and released me.

  "Dale," he said, "I support you, completely, I wouldn't be here if I didn't. I just think that there might be more behind this than there appears to be. I ... I know that you believe you're the Shadow Seer because of those signs and that you think the strange child is connected to it somehow, but I just wonder if there isn't more to it."

  "Like what?" I snapped at him.

  "I don't know, Dale," Teveriel replied. "But ... well, the Order, they believe you're the Shadow Seer even though they don't know that Mayrila is your mother, right?" I nodded stiffly. "Well, perhaps someone else has also seen the similarities you have with this fabled prophet and has sent the child to you to try and manipulate you, with magic, or something. Perhaps they want to use you for their own purposes and this child is a tool for them. You're the heir to the Carnian Throne, after Prince Gerian. That makes you a target."

  "Yes ..." I said reluctantly. It was a possibility. I had to admit that.

  "So ... so perhaps you being like this Seer is just a coincidence after all and this child is something else altogether?"

  "Perhaps ..."

  "And that's all I'm saying, Candale. That we can't take this at face value any more than we can take what this Talira woman said. We just need some more proof."

  "What sort of proof?"

  Teveriel shrugged. "A vision, maybe? Or perhaps the Rose Prophecies will have something that will make it undeniable?"

  "But ... but you think the child was sent to me, into my dreams, by someone trying to manipulate me, so how can you be sure that any vision I have is real and not just something else sent by these same people?"

  Teveriel frowned. "That's true," he said slowly. "But, if someone could send you something that looked like a vision then why bother with the child?" I frowned at that and Teveriel laughed. "I know," he said. "It's complicated. We can't reason this through because we don't really know what's happening. I just want to keep an open mind until we have a little more evidence, all right?"

  "All right," I said slowly. "But, even though I don't know what this child is, or what it wants, I still believe that I'm the Seer. I don't think this is a coincidence."

  "I know," Teveriel said. "And I hope we can find an answer to all of this in White Oaks, but if we are to get there in one piece you're going to have to be more careful."

  "Yes, I know."

  Teveriel gave me an unsteady smile, his tired eyes scanning my face, trying to get me to smile, too. "But rest assured, Trellany and I will do our best to keep your feet on the ground and make sure that none of your wild, spontaneous and generally ill-thought out ideas gets you into too much trouble."

  "Thanks," I said dryly, giving him a hard look.

  The smile faded. "You're not angry with me, are you?" he asked, nervously. "I really didn't mean to upset you. I just thought it might be useful if one of us kept his feet on the ground and didn't get swept away by all this."

  "Yes," I said reluctantly. I sat down heavily on the bed opposite him. "Yes. I understand that."

  "And you're not angry with me?"

  "No, Tev," I said softly. It was more of a weary sigh, the sound my mother used to make when she caught me doing something she had expressly told me not to. "I'm not angry."

  "Good," Teveriel said, with relief, "because I would really hate that, Dale."

  A few minutes later the door opened and Trellany came in. "I'm so sorry, Prince Candale," she gasped, as soon as she saw me. "I shouldn't have spoken to you that way. I just panicked. I'm so sorry."

  "No," I said. "You were right to. I was being foolish. It could have been a trap."

  "Yes," Trellany said. She gave me a nervous smile and twisted her fingers before her anxiously. "We have to leave. Now."

  "Leave?" I gasped. "It's pouring outside!"

  "If she was a spy," Trellany said, "then she has found what she was looking for and we have to leave. If she isn't a spy, then I'm sorry, we're going to be very cold and wet for no reason for a while. But I'm sure you can see how it's better not to take a chance on this."

  "Yes," I said slowly. "But-"

  "I'll give you time to pack, but be quick," Trellany said, and she was gone.

  "She doesn't believe Talira was a prophet either," I said softly. "She thinks that it's a trap."

  "She's just trying to play it safe, Candale," Teveriel said.

  I didn't answer him, just turned away to start to pack up my things.

  There was no sign of Talira in the taproom when we got downstairs and I saw a wary look come into Trellany's eyes as she realised that the seer was missing. Jelanna came forward to bid us a safe journey, and to hug me. Krystia, too, and I could see the impatience in Trellany's eyes as I went through this. Neither woman asked us why we were leaving so suddenly and in such bad weather, but I could see the curiosity in their eyes.

  Outside it was just as bad as I had feared it would be
- wet, windy, and freezing. I was wearing several layers, had on my gloves, my hooded cloak over my coat, yet I was still cold. I knew that it was the biting wind that made it feel harsher than it actually was and it was that same wind that blew the rain directly at us as we made our way back to the Autumn Road to continue our journey.

  We didn't talk as we rode. There was nothing for any of us to say. There was no way to make this situation any less unpleasant, so we all remained quiet, wrapped up with our thoughts, within our cloaks, wallowing in our own self-misery, as our horses trudged slowly onwards along the badly maintained road, splashing through the puddles.

  I rode, as the others did, huddled over the back of my mount. I was painfully aware that this torment was my fault. Again my curiosity had led me into trouble and dragged people down with me, but there was nothing that could be done about it now.

  All too soon my robe was soaked and I was so drenched that I had forgotten what it felt like to be warm and dry. My black curls stuck against my cheeks, feeling itchy and sticky, and rain ran constantly down my face. My nose was running, and the beard that I hated so much, was wet and smelt damp. But I knew that it would be worse at night when we stopped to make camp, for the horses' sake, if not for our own. Even if we could find somewhere sheltered to stop, there would be no firewood. All useable timber would be too wet to light, and certainly the wind would blow it out if it did catch. It would be cold, wet and dark, totally unpleasant and there was simply no way to avoid it.

  As the sky turned purple and orange through the heavy grey clouds, Trellany pulled us to a halt. "We'll camp over there," she said, pointing a way across the field to where there was a small clump of trees. "It won't be very dry, I should think, or warm, but it's shelter of a sort."

  "Fine," Teveriel agreed.

  That was all that was said.

  We rode across the field toward the clump of trees, only to find that it was smaller than it had looked from the road, just three trees just standing together. They would not offer much protection, if any. The ground beneath us was sodden. Mud had splashed up to soak the horses' legs and, as we dismounted, we sank down into it.