She looks at her husband then back at Skylar. Her eyes are closed again. “Yes,” says her mom, “We’ll go talk to your dad. I can drive you home in a few hours.”
“Come on, honey,” she drags her husband out of the room.
My hand automatically goes to Sky’s again.
“Alec,” she whispers. Her eyes are still closed.
“I’m here.”
“What happened?”
“You don’t remember?” I ask.
“No.” She pauses. “Why am I in the hospital?”
I find myself not knowing what to say. I sure don’t want to cause some kind of trauma by telling her the truth and shocking the hell out of her.
“Why don’t you rest now? We can talk about that later.”
She opens her eyes again for a split second, smiles, and closes them again.
“How was your appointment?” she asks. “You’re okay, right?”
That, she remembers…
“I had to reschedule it.”
She squeezes my hand. “I think you are okay.”
“Why do you say that?”
She falls asleep again.
When her parents open the door, I slowly move my hand away from hers and get up.
“Can we talk outside?” I ask.
They both look confused, but walk back out of the room. I follow them and close the door behind me.
“She doesn’t remember what happened,” I say.
“She was awake long enough to ask you?” her mom asks just as her dad asks, “What did you tell her?”
“She wasn’t awake for long. I didn’t think telling her was a good idea.”
I’m surprised when he thanks me for that. He sees one of the nurses and stops her. I follow him and as he starts to explain what I just told him, Sky’s monitors go off. I’m in her room before anyone else—not that I can do anything about it.
She looks terrified and she’s crying.
The nurses are in the room now and pushing me out of the way. I try to get to her, but her dad is pushing me out of the room. When we’re outside, he lets go. “If you don’t calm down, you’re not going to see my daughter again until she’s out of here. Got it? You need to let the nurses do their jobs and stay out of the way. Understood?”
“Yes, Sir.”
The beeping stops and the nurse he was talking to, comes out. “She remembers,” she says. “I gave her something to calm her down. You all should rest while she’s resting.”
“Thank you,” says her mom. She then looks at me. “I’m going to take you home now, Alec.”
“I don’t want to—”
“I know. Trust me, I know. But you need to rest. You can come back in the morning.”
“But what if she wakes up before then?”
“You’ll be the first to know.”
CHAPTER FORTY-ONE
It’s almost three in the morning when I walk into my bedroom. I go to my window and stare at hers. I hate knowing she is not there.
I lay down in my bed, with my phone next to me, and decide to close my eyes for a few minutes…
My phone rings at around seven in the morning. I jump awake and answer without even looking. “How is she?” I ask.
“She’s awake,” says her mom. “… and she’s asking for you.”
“I’m on my way.” I wish we had a hospital closer to this damn town.
I remember my truck is at the school. I rode in the ambulance with Sky yesterday.
I go to wake up Mom, but she isn’t in her room.
I run down the stairs and find her hanging up the phone.
She sighs. “It was Skylar’s mom asking me to let you go back to the hospital. Are you ready?”
“Yeah, but you don’t have to go, Mom. I just need a ride to get my truck.”
“No. I’m going. I’m also going to wait there until your doctor can work you into his schedule. I can’t handle everything that’s going on with the added stress of not knowing the results of your test.”
We get in the car, but before she even starts it, she asks, “Son, how serious are you and Skylar?”
“What do you mean?”
She takes a deep breath and turns around to look at me.
“Hmm. Would you mind driving while we talk about this?” I ask.
She starts the car, but doesn’t move.
“Alec, we… Skylar’s parents especially—well, we’re just overwhelmed with everything that we’re seeing. You’re making all of these life changes since you reconnected and we’re thankful for all of those changes, but then… we learned she pushed you out of the way and took that bullet, and your attitude toward everything at the hospital…”
“Mom, please don’t overanalyze this. What happened put everyone over the edge. Sky and I, are a normal high school couple. We’re just getting to know each other and dating at quite a slow speed if you ask me.”
“And what exactly does that mean, Alec Matthew?”
I sigh. “It means you have nothing to worry about, Mom.”
She shakes her head and starts driving, “Son, you and Skylar are far from a normal couple. You’ve known her almost your whole life. I just don’t want you to move too fast, no matter the circumstances.”
“You mean, if I’m sick again.” I say.
“Alec, I didn’t say that.”
I know she didn’t say it, but it’s exactly what she meant.
Neither of us says anything else for the rest of the drive.
When we get to the hospital, Mom says she’s going to see my doctor. “Answer your phone when I text you,” she says.
“Yes, Mom.”
***
When I walk in, I’m told that Sky was just moved out of ICU. I guess I didn’t expect them to move her so fast, but I’m happy with the news. I walk toward her new room and freeze when I see that, only three doors down, there is a cop standing in front of one of the rooms. I know what that means. That’s where he is…
I take a deep breath and knock on her door before opening it.
Her mom and dad walk toward the door and motion for me to follow them outside.
“She’s not talking to anyone,” says her mom in between sobs. “We figured she might talk to you.”
I nod and open the door back up. Her eyes are closed. I walk closer and sit next to her.
She opens her eye, looks into mine, and tears run down her face. I lower myself toward her and kiss her forehead. I sit on the chair by her side, grab her hand and just wait until she’s ready to talk.
“How many people got hurt?” she asks.
“I’m not sure exactly. Some of the guys from the team are here and so is Lizzie.”
“Did anyone—”
I feel like I have to stop her from finishing the question, as if keeping her from saying those words will take some of her pain away. “Mandy and Grayson didn’t make it, and—”
She squeezes my hand and I see more and more tears run down her face.
“And Mike?” she finally asks the question that I have dreaded the most.
“All I know is that he is out of surgery.” I pause. “I can find out more if you want me to.”
“No,” she says. “I don’t want to know.”
“I’m sorry,” I don’t know what else to say.
“I don’t understand how someone—how he could do something like this.” She pauses, “I just don’t understand. How could he look at me and then try to shoot the guy I’m falling for, right in front of me.
I feel like time stands still. Did she just say what I think she said? How can I even feel an ounce of happiness in the middle of this tragic situation? But I do… no matter how much I fight it.
“I wish I knew the answer, Sky. I—” I take a deep breath. “I hate him for hurting the girl I’m falling for.”
She looks at me and her eyes widen in shock. Here I am, in the middle of all of this and I'm unable to hide a grin. No matter how much tragedy surrounds me right now—hell, I could be dying for all
I know… But the girl I’m falling for… actually, the girl I have loved my whole life and just now realized it, is here, right in front of me, and I feel like I shouldn’t waste a minute of whatever life I have left.
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
I hear my phone buzz and look at the screen. It’s mom asking me to meet her on the third floor to see my doctor.
“I have to go,” I tell Skylar, “But I’ll be back very soon.”
“Okay,” she says and I can tell how tired she is.
Mom is a nervous wreck when I get to the third floor.
“The doctor needs one x-ray before he sees us,” she says.
The nurse is already ready for me. She takes an x-ray of my wrist—the same one I had fractured not long ago. Then we go into the room, and wait.
The doctor comes in and he looks the same as he always does. I always watch for signs of whether he’s about to give me good news or bad news, but I can never tell by his expression.
He looks from Mom to me and asks if I’m playing baseball again.
“Yes. Why?”
And then comes the lecture… that I should have given more time for my wrist to recover and checked with him first. Apparently, it was too soon and my wrist is fractured again, hence the pain. I leave out the fact that I played once while it was still fractured. When I ask about the blood test, he says my body wasn’t ready to take on that kind of exercise again without proper nutrition and that I have anemia.
I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
“That is it?” I ask.
The doctor raises an eyebrow and another lecture comes about taking care of myself and not pushing myself too hard. The splint goes back on my wrist and all I can think about is that I can’t wait to tell Sky.
“And no baseball until I clear you,” he says and I tense.
“What’s wrong? You can sit out a few games.”
Mom tells him what happened and that the season will likely be canceled. At this point, we don’t even know when we’ll be back in school. The doctor heard about the shooting; everyone has. He just didn’t know that was my school.
Mom sounds like a completely different person without this stress on her and she’s still chatting with the doctor after he’s done with me.
I keep looking at the time. Finally, I cut her off, “Mom?”
“Yeah. Go ahead. I know you want to tell her,” she smiles and I rush out of the room.
When I get to Skylar’s room, Kyle is sitting by her side. He brought his guitar and I appreciate him trying to cheer her up. He is singing this stupid song he wrote one night when he was too tired to function. I’m surprised he even remembers it.
Her parents are in the room too, both sleeping on the small couch.
Sky looks at me and notices my wrist, “What happened?” she asks.
I shrug and go stand next to her. “I guess it wasn’t healed as well as it should’ve been for me to play, and...” I smile, “The doctor said I’m fine, Sky. I mean, I have anemia, but with a proper diet to keep up with training, I’ll be okay.”
“I’m happy for you, Bro,” says Kyle. “I wish we could finish this season… for you, and in honor of the other guys too.” He looks down at his guitar and shakes his head.
Sky tries to move to reach me and flinches as pain shoots through her side. I quickly move closer and grab her hand.
“Don’t try that again,” I say.
She moves her other hand and puts it near the bandaged area on the left side of her stomach.
“How bad does it hurt?”
“It just hurts when I try to move.” She gives me a small smile. “I knew you’d be okay.”’
I smile back at her and then she closes her eyes.
Once she falls asleep, I ask Kyle if she has asked about Mike.
“Yeah,” says Kyle. “She wanted to know what happened that day and if I knew how he’s doing. She didn’t want to upset you by asking.”
I shake my head.
“What did you tell her?”
“I said I don’t know how he’s doing and I told her exactly what you told me about what happened.”
It feels like my brain is on autopilot and, even just a mention of that day, gets those scenes replaying in my head. After she was shot, my first reaction was to get to her. It was also Mike’s reaction. But all I saw was Mike, coming toward her still holding the gun. I saw the opportunity and tackled him, but it wasn’t enough for him to drop the gun. Next thing I knew, the gun was pointed to my chest, at a very short distance, and I was begging him to let me call help for Sky. Luckily, the cops came in and acted before he got a chance to shoot me.
“Are you okay?” asks Kyle, bringing me back to this moment.
“Yeah. I have a feeling she’s going to want to see him eventually. That is a bad idea.”
“On that, we agree,” I hear her dad say from the couch. My daughter is not going to see him ever again.”
SKYLAR
I feel like I’m in the middle of a nightmare, at least until Alec tells me he’s not sick. His news brings a little light into this darkness. That, and him saying I’m the girl he’s falling for. But thinking about those happy moments never lasts long. I’m constantly angry. I keep thinking about Mike and wondering what happened. I want to know why he did this. I want to know why he would hurt so many people like this. Why would he hurt me?
I hear Dad and Alec talk about him, and they’re right. I shouldn’t see him. I can’t see him ever again.
CHAPTER FORTY-THREE
A few days go by. I’m finally able to walk around and the doctor says that I can go home very soon. School starts again next week. After much discussion, Kyle’s mom convinced everyone that the best way for us to deal with this is to get back to our regular routines. Some agreed, others disagreed, but we have to finish the school year eventually, so they put together a plan and hired an extra person to be available to talk to students. And Alec and I made a deal. He said if I talk to someone about what happened, that he’d talk to someone about his fears of getting sick again.
Alec spends most of his time with me, which is driving my dad crazy. In fact, I’m rarely alone with Alec. Dad and Mom are always around. I worry that I won’t get to see him as much when I get home.
When the doctor finally discharges me to go home, he insists I use a wheelchair to the car, even though I can walk with very little pain. And Alec insists on being the one to push the wheelchair.
When we step out of my room, I see a cop standing in front of one of the rooms.
I turn to my dad, who is right next to me.
“Is that where he is?”
He hesitates. “Yes.”
I nod and we start to go the other way.
I change my mind. I have to see him. I have to ask him why or I’ll never be able to get that out of my head.
“Stop!” I yell.
Alec stops right away and moves to where I can see him. “Are you okay? What’s wrong?”
“I have to see Mike,” I say.
“Absolutely not,” says Dad. Alec has a look of horror in his eyes.
I look at Dad. “I have to, Dad. I keep reliving that nightmare over and over. I have to look him in the eyes and ask him why.”
Alec kneels in front of me and puts his hand on my knee. “Please, don’t do this, Sky,” he begs.
I put my hand over his. “I’m sorry,” I whisper before I look at Dad and try to convince him. “Dad, wouldn’t it be safer for me to see him here than in a prison somewhere?”
“Sky—”
“I know. I’d have to wait years before I can go without your permission, but you don’t understand, Dad. I don’t even understand! I just have to see him.”
Dad turns around to face Mom and they just look at one another without saying a word.
He sighs. “I’ll go find out if that is even possible, but I’ll be in there with you the whole time.”
Alec looks hurt. He looks from me to Dad. “I’d like to
be there with her too, please.”
Dad surprisingly agrees and starts to walk toward the cop. The cop tells him something and then Dad walks away, probably to talk to someone else.
He comes back a few minutes later with another cop and a doctor. The cop and doctor go into the room and Dad comes toward us.
“They’re going to ask him first.”
I feel nervous and anxious. I latch onto Alec’s hand and he feels much colder than he was minutes ago.
Soon, the cop opens the door and motions for us to go in. Alec lets go of my hand and goes to the back of the chair. It feels like he’s going slower than normal.
Dad goes in first. Then Alec pushes the wheelchair in the room. Mike is sitting on the bed and my eyes lock on his. I feel a small sense of relief when I see remorse in his eyes, like maybe the Mike I know is still in there, somewhere. Then his eyes move to Alec’s and he turns cold again.
“GET OUT! EVERYONE!” he screams and the machines start to beep.
“I need to talk to you,” I say. “Please.”
He looks back at me. “Not with him here,” he points toward Alec.
I try to turn to look at Alec but pain shoots through my side. Alec quickly moves to my side.
I hate to ask him this, “Can you—please step outside for a minute?” I ask.
“Please don’t ask me this, Sky.”
“OUT!” Yells Mike. “You’re hurt because of him. I want him out.”
I feel mad like I’ve never felt before. I stand up and Alec comes closer for support. I lean into him and Mike’s whole expression changes to something unrecognizable.
“Are you kidding me?” I yell. The doctor tries to get me out of the room but the cop asks him to let me say what I have to say. The doctor keeps his eyes on the monitors. “You have one minute,” he says.
I take a deep breath, but that doesn’t help any. “YOU are the one who hurt me, Mike! YOU pulled the trigger. How could you do this to so many people? How could you do this to me? WHY?”
He has an empty look in his eyes. “You were not supposed to get hurt, Skylar. You’re my best friend.”
I’m in tears now. “I WAS your best friend. And do you honestly think I would hurt any less if you had hurt Alec instead of me?”
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