An Ordinary Love (A Christian Contemporary Romance) (Sidney's Sanctuary Book 1)

by Tina Bustamante

  “We all need to listen to that still small voice and take heed. If we learn to hear that voice in the small areas of our lives, when no one cares, when no one is paying attention, then eventually we will hear God’s voice in the large and life-changing matters. If we focus on hearing God, on doing what he says, on training our ears to his voice alone, we’ll have the knowledge and the wisdom to recognize the Lord’s voice and we’ll have the inner disposition to do what he tells us to do, even when it’s difficult.

  “It’s simple; it’s profound.”

  “Most of us want our lives to count, to matter for something. I’m coming to realize that it is in listening, it is in paying attention to the small details around us and taking action when everyone least expects it, that we make our mark on this earth.

  “Joseph was known for being Jesus’ earthly father. He is also known as a man of kindness and to some, he’s known as a man who was willing to stand against the moral traditions of his day and provide safety to a woman who was about ready to change history.” He looked out at the people in his congregation and took a deep breath.

  “Serving this small church has been the greatest honor of my life. I have enjoyed every single day I served here. I have wonderful and dear memories. But I’ve realized, it is time for me to move on. It’s time for me to pass this small, dear congregation onto someone else. It’s time for someone else to come and tend you special people. And so, I would like to announce with excitement, and profound gratitude, that I will be resigning at the end of the year.”

  The congregation’s muttering began immediately. Some gasped. Some nodded. Astrid pinched her lips together and frowned. Sidney raised one eyebrow and winked at him, a special wink. He was thankful for her presence in his life.

  ~

  After the message, during the final song and prayer, Sidney squeezed Betty’s arm.“I’m going home. I’ll see you later.”

  “I’ll call you,” Betty told her.

  Once she got to her house, she went inside and curled up on her bed. For the first time since she’d arrived on Perez Island, she wrapped herself up in a blanket and cried.

  Her life in Seattle was over. Her new life on Perez had begun. There was no going back. Sidney knew she was making the right decision. Even if marriage and children never happened for her, she needed to be in the right place, the place where God had led her, doing something she loved, not going somewhere or becoming someone else to be loved.

  Later on, she poured herself a glass of wine, watched a holiday movie, and went to bed.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  A Wedding Reception

  Sidney stood in her room just after Betty and Dan’s vow renewal. She was trying to get out of her dress. The ceremony had been amazing. Betty looked as happy as a bride of twenty. Matt had done an excellent job on the message, sharing about the long walk of love and how Dan and Betty have shown everyone on Perez Island the beauty of ordinary day in and day out, love. When everyone started getting ready to dance, Sidney decided to throw on something more comfortable. Her dress had started to itch and her black heels were pinching her toes.

  During the month of December, Sidney’s Sanctuaryhad constant visitors. With Betty’s cooking, Candace’s cleaning, and Sidney’s charm, it was a complete hit.

  And wonder upon wonders, she and Kell had finally become honest friends. She told him a few days after Matt announced his retirement that Jeff had gone back to Seattle, alone. Kell studied her for a moment and she noticed a flicker in his eye.

  “Are you okay with that?” he asked her.

  Sidney closed her eyes for a moment and tipped her head. Surprisingly, she was okay with it. Despite everything—the divorce, Jeff’s infidelity, her deep desire to try and save her marriage, and then Jeff’s attempt to woo her back, she knew that Perez Island and Sidney’s Sanctuarywere right for her. Her place was here now.“Yes. I’m where I’m supposed to be,” she said simply.

  After that conversation, something had opened up between them. She didn’t understand it nor had she tried to. She was content to let it be. They chatted in the afternoons when he came home from the clinic, and sometimes he’d stop by the mansion to share a cup of coffee or a glass of wine. Sometimes, Jake would do his homework on her kitchen island while Kell tried to teach her how to make something new for dinner. He made a wonderful pasta with white sauce.

  She didn’t know what to make of the Christmas gift he’d given her last week—an antique copy of Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. Betty and Candace believed it to be a romantic gesture. Candace had no doubt about what it meant.

  “He’s trying to tell you he was a jerk like Mr. Darcy. But people change.”

  Sidney wasn’t convinced.“Maybe he’s just being nice. He knows I love English literature and Pride and Prejudice is a classic.”

  All that aside, at least they were friends, and for the first time in many months, Sidney felt that life was moving along as it should.

  She had friends who accepted her just as she was, a mansion for a home, a new bed and breakfast that was beginning to fill up with guests, and she had to admit that despite all the drama of the past year, she was happy, full. She was pulling on a pair of jeans when her cell phone rang. She grabbed a sweatshirt and was slipping it over her head when she noticed, it was her mother.

  “Happy New Year’s, Mom,” she said, answering the phone.

  “Oh good, darling. I’m glad I caught you. I have some news for you…”

  ~

  Kell lost track of Sidney at the reception. He hadn’t seen her for over an hour. He’d grown accustomed to knowing her whereabouts most of the time. If they were in the same room, he knew it. If she was across the yard standing on her front porch, he could sense it. He heard her voice ring out in any place as if she were the only one who spoke. He was aware of her in much the same way the moon is related to the earth’s gravitational pull and consequently, he was losing his mind. He didn’t know what to do with his feelings for Sidney Franklin. They overwhelmed him like a tsunami. She was present and open and kind to him. His heart, that had been as guarded as a citadel, had slowly opened and it was beating again, like something had decompressed inside him. He was lighter.

  Over the past month, since his epiphany with Danny Holberg, he’d spent a lot of time thinking about how to tell her how he felt. He was trying to show her, but he knew the time had come for him to say it out loud. He loved her. But, no matter how he ran it through his mind, he couldn’t seem to get the courage up to say it. He was still afraid.

  It worried him, she had just disappeared from a reception at her own house. He grabbed his jacket from his chair and went to find her. There were things to say. He wasn’t sure how he was going to say them, but he’d do his best. After all, it was New Year’s Eve.

  She was beautiful. She made his throat close up. Every time he thought of her his heart would jump, start beating faster. He needed to take the risk and say it. Even if she said no. There were moments, when they were together, when he was sure she felt the same, but with Sidney it was hard to tell, she was kind to everyone, open-hearted even to strangers. What made him think he was unique?

  He found her sitting in one of the Adirondack chairs at the edge of her yard, over-looking the water. Her knees were pulled up to her chest with a multi-colored afghan blanket wrapped around her. It looked like something she’d bought at a market in Tijuana, Mexico. She gripped a bottle of something.

  He walked over, trying not to make too much noise. He sat down in the seat next to her. Off in the distance, the loud music and the tinkling of wine glasses drifted around him. There was no good reason for her to be away from all the guests. It was out of character for her. She was usually in the thick of things, not sitting off on the sidelines. She handed him the bottle without looking at him. He took it from her hand. Rum. Very old, aged rum. He took a swig, surprised by how smooth and nice it was in the cold air.

  “That’s good stuff,” he said, passing it back.


  “I’ve been saving it.”

  “What’s the special occasion?”

  “I got some news today. Decided there was no time like the present to drink some good rum.” Her voice was laced with sarcasm.

  “What’s wrong, Sidney?”

  She stared off into the water.“Jeff’s getting married again. He’s going to have a baby.” She shook her head.“He didn’t want babies, for ten years.”

  “I don’t think Jeff has any idea what he really wants.”

  “I knew what I wanted. I wanted a baby. For years. He’s getting everything I wanted.” She shrugged and finally looked at him.“Tonight, I found out the woman my husband was having an affair with, is expecting a baby. They’re getting married. I wanted a family for seven years and he wasn’t ready.” She stared at the water.“I guess, now, he’s ready.”

  “Sidney, the guy’s a jerk. There are other men out there.”

  “I don’t have it in me to start over again, Kell. I’m afraid. What if he gets tired of me too? What if the same thing happens again.”

  “Maybe it won’t feel like starting over. Maybe it’ll feel like being with your best friend.”

  “What do you know? You don’t want to start over either. You've told me as much.”

  Kell shrugged, and reached for another swig of her rum.“I’ve changed. And if I can change, anyone can. I didn’t think I’d ever be ready, but that’s different now.”

  She stayed quiet for a moment. His words hung in the air—poignant. She shifted in her chair.“What are we going to do, you and me?”

  Her outright honesty burned his senses. Did he have the courage to tell her the truth? It had been so long that he’d guarded his heart, kept it tucked up inside him. It seemed impossible to get the words out.“It’s probably time for me to go and check on the groom. I’m sure Dan wants to say good-bye before he leaves.”

  She glared at him.“Don’t you dare. I sit out here and bare my heart to you, tell you what’s really going on, and you walk away when I ask one question?” She shifted forward in her chair gave him a long hard stare. He flinched.

  “What?” she asked.“Too freckled? Too annoying? Too opinionated for someone like you?”

  “That’s not it, Sidney. It’s not it at all.”

  “Then tell me what’s wrong. You asked for us to be friends. You act like you care for me but when asked for anything direct you run and hide.”

  He stood. He wasn’t ready. Her direct questions, her clear gaze paralyzed him.“Like I said, I should go and check on Dan.” He got a few feet, ready to go back to the house and paused, rubbed his chin. He couldn’t just let her think, that’s what he thought. At some point he’d have to just come out with the truth and let it be there in front of them. And maybe this was the time. He turned back around and faced her, with his back against the full night.“Because I’m in love with you.”

  “What?”

  “You ask what we’re going to do? I don’t know. Because you’re the dream, Sidney, and I thought my days of dreaming were over. You enchant me with your carefree laugh, you annoy me with your pointed comments. You have curves in all the right places, and because every time I see you, I can’t help but wonder what it would be like to kiss you again, to hold you, to be your best friend. Frankly, it makes it hard to breathe.”

  He stepped toward her and held his arm out in front of him.“I know I’m old and spent. I understand you offered friendship and I’ve tried to take it, but it’s left me even more lonely than before.”

  She stood. He had offered his hand and she took it.

  He whispered to her.“I’ll try to be whatever you want, Sidney.”

  She closed the gap between them.“Kell, you’re saying you love me?”

  He rubbed his chin again.“Yes.”

  She slowly reached her other hand out and set it behind his neck, bringing him closer to her face. She smelled of vanilla and rum. It was intoxicating.

  “I think I love you too.”

  “You don’t just want to be friends? I thought you couldn’t stand me? Well, at least until a few weeks ago.”

  “I’ve always been of the opinion that hate and love are strongly related emotions. You have a way of bringing out the best and the worst in me.”

  He stared at her, grappling with the weight and meaning of her words.

  “Just kiss me please, and stop analyzing every word we say.”

  He sighed, leaned down, chuckling and kissing her all at the same time. He soaked her in, tasting her mouth, wondering if it could get better than this. Sidney pulled away from him and searched his eyes. He figured she’d say something profound and wise, the way she always did, but instead she raised her eyebrows, like she really wanted to say something important, but then leaned her head against his chest and sighed.

  “I’m glad we had this conversation, Kell.”

  He couldn’t breathe.

  She looked at him again. Her hair wisped around her face and she grinned ever so slightly. He liked her lips. They were plump and red and her freckles danced before him.

  Her arrival on this island, only a few months ago, had changed everything. Life was more full, as if the leaves had finally blossomed on the trees. He loved Sidney Franklin. Real, ordinary, everyday love, like his dad had talked about at the wedding, and it was the most extraordinary feeling he could ever remember, one he’d been fighting against since the day he met her. But, here she was in his arms and it was right where he wanted her to be. He had no idea what it would be like tomorrow when the party was over, when she wasn’t upset about Jeff having a baby, when she wasn’t drinking ten-year aged rum, if she’d regret everything she’d said, or if she’d doubt his sincerity. He didn’t care because he’d be ready to tell her again tomorrow, and again the day after that. He’d tell her he loved her.

  The End

  Tina Bustamante grew up in the Seattle area, lived on a missionary literature ship called the MV Logos II where she traveled to over thirty-five countries. She studied theology and ministry leadership at Northwest University. Her first novel AS WATERS GONE BY is available with Leap Books. Tina is a member of the Redbud Writers Guild and she blogs at www.tinabustamante.com where she writes about authentic faith, and the constant interplay between the sacred and the secular.