Divided

by Madeline Dyer

  At last, Raleigh allows me to turn away from Jed’s body, and I look at him. His animated face. The slight stubble on his jawline. The way my disheveled appearance fills his eyes.

  “But you know those tendrils are bad now,” Raleigh croons. “You know it. And that is why you screamed, so I am proud of you. That scream was you. That was you fighting against the negativity the parasite is trying to breed in you. Recognition is an important step.” His lips get thinner as they stretch into a wide grin. “So, now, I shall make it so that you see this as the happy occasion that it is. I shall help you see clearly.

  “Few Chosen Ones are worthy enough to view a great man’s body. But you are. I can see the worthiness in you, Shania, despite the evil. Zahlia begged for access, but she is not worthy enough. But you really are. And now you shall understand and appreciate it on your own, without the darkness trying to evoke fear and loss within you. You shall compare the two viewings, and you will see the evil for what it is, and you will renounce it.”

  Raleigh grabs me, and, before I can even register what’s happening, I’m swallowing an augmenter. It slips down my throat like sand, catching and burning.

  A few seconds pass, and then the knot inside me unravels a little.

  I try to back away, make it a few steps before Raleigh’s hands catch me around the shoulders. I flinch.

  He stares into my eyes, but all I can see is my Enhanced face in his, and I start to feel…not sick exactly, but….

  “Now, isn’t that better?” he says, and he makes me look at the body. “Now you do not feel those bad feelings, do you? No. Now you feel calm, and you feel strong. Death does not affect you. And we all need to be strong, don’t we? Isn’t it wonderful—being able to stand over the body of a man you loved and feel not sadness and pain and fear, but strength and happiness and relief, because you know he is free and not suffering any longer, that another small part of the world is right?”

  Right? The word burns through me, but I can’t think. I look at Jed’s body, and I don’t feel scared anymore. But I don’t feel calm or strong—not like Raleigh said I do. I feel…nothing. No goodness. No badness. Not even any sickness.

  And isn’t it good to not feel the bad?

  “Being able to face death with courage and intrepidity is important. We cannot have those emotions clouding us, changing our actions, making us weak and useless in times when we must be strong. Look, Shania, death is not something to be feared, is it? Do you feel fear now?”

  I shake my head. He makes me. But, for the first time, it feels like it might also be my choice. Like it’s both of us. Like we’re working together.

  Somewhere deep inside me, something cries a long, drawn-out cry.

  “And you do not fear your death now, do you, Shania?” Raleigh whispers. “Not when you know that your death will end the evil in this world, not when you know that you’ll ensure that everyone has the perfect life. Not when I can promise you that you will feel no pain, and your name will go down in history. You’ll be the savior.”

  No pain. He can make a deal with the God of Death? But Enhanced Seers can’t contact the Gods and Goddesses….

  “And you want to be strong, don’t you?” Raleigh says. “You want to be the best you can be—it’s what everyone wants. It’s a natural human desire—a need. And it’s essential for survival. And soon, very soon, you will be better, now that you have chosen to walk the path to redemption. I understand it is and has been difficult—and that is not your fault. When you came here, there was such an immense amount of evil controlling you, and it will take a while to drain completely from your soul and body.” He pauses. “But you are on the way there now. And that is wonderful, is it not, to know that nothing—not even the death of a loved one—can break you? That you are strong and perfect. Invincible.”

  He lifts a finger to my face, pushes my chin up so that I shut my mouth. I hadn’t realized it was open. I stare at him, my head feeling heavier. Inside my chest, I feel a strange jittery rhythm, and I concentrate on it as it gets smoother, like an engine starting up.

  “And now you can see it properly, can’t you? You thought I was being cruel showing you Jed’s body, did you not? But I wasn’t the one being cruel. That was you being cruel. Do you see how the darkness in you twisted things? It made you think I was bad, because it knew that you were. You were the one inflicting cruelty on your friends, making them ill. Can you see that, my dear butterfly? Can you see the truth behind the picture the darkness paints?”

  He makes me nod.

  “And the Chosen should not want to inflict cruelty on one another. It is bad. And you don’t want to hurt your friends, do you?”

  I shake my head. I think he makes me. But I’m not sure. I’m slipping. Slipping again.

  Raleigh smiles. “You mustn’t worry. For this—this has awoken you, has it not? This has taught you that. And you mustn’t feed the darkness, must you? No, my dear. You mustn’t. And you’ll stop the sickness, won’t you? You’ll make your friends better?”

  “I want them to be better,” I whisper.

  “Good girl,” he says, and he strokes my head. “What a good girl. What a brave girl. And now your bravery will be rewarded with feelings of only goodness and joy. It may take time to get the last echoes of evil out of you, but we will do it, I promise you, Shania. Darkness cannot live in you when you’ve renounced it.” He strokes my uneven hair. “See, it’s leaving already—now you have seen it for what it really is—and it will not return, because you, my darling butterfly, you are stronger than it is. You’ll feel better soon, and you’ll be with your friends. You’ll be rehabilitated together, shown how to live true and prosperous lives, because you are Chosen Ones, and soon you will feel only beauty and wonder and happiness.”

  Raleigh makes me drink three more augmenters, then he takes me straight back to the quarantine bay.

  “Keep an eye on them,” he tells one of his guards. “They’ll start improving now. But it may be a while until they’re back to full health; there’s a lot of evil Shania needs to draw out of herself, as well as removing her evil substance that has been infecting them. But she will help them now that she has decided upon the right side and begun to squash the evil. I’ve broken the darkness within her, and she will not let it repair itself now. She has proven she’s in control.”

  Then Raleigh tells me that he’s being kind, letting me rest and see my friends, that seeing them—and how they’re suffering—will help me fight the evil, and seeing the pain will help me heal them all sooner, take away the evil sickness that the Untamed part of me planted in them. Because now I will be shocked. I will be horrified.

  But—

  Something clashes through me like a thousand weights being dropped on my soul.

  He’s wrong.

  There’s no evil inside me.

  It is him.

  He’s the evil.

  Pure evil.

  Evil. The word burns through me, makes me feel sick.

  And then I am sick, sick into the bucket in my cell.

  For several seconds after, all I can do is concentrate on breathing. Even though with every breath I take, I smell the putrid bile in the bucket. No one takes it away.

  I turn to my left, look for Esther.

  But the cell is empty.

  “Where…where’s Esther?”

  No one answers, so I repeat my question again.

  At last, a Zharat man looks at me. “She got sicker. Worse than…us. They took her.”

  “Took her?” My heart drops. “Took her where?”

  But he glares at me, then turns away.

  I touch my forehead slowly. My head feels hot.

  Clare lies on her side, her back to her barred door. I try to watch her, try to see the movement of her breaths—something. But I can’t, and—

  No. No. No.

  Time passes.

  I look at the others. One of the Zharat men is sitting up, and he shakes his head at me. His eyes look more Untamed than they
should be—the mirrors are only ghosts.

  “I’m not doing this,” I say. I hold up my hands toward him as they start to tingle.

  “I know.”

  My body jolts. “You know? Tell them!”

  “You are not directly doing this. But it is your fault,” he croaks. “Upsetting the Gods… Your fault. This is their punishment. We must die because a fraud has tainted us. You have tainted us. Still, death is better than being an Enhanced.”

  I try to ignore him. I look back at the two Enhanced Ones at the other end of the room. Then I look at my hands as they start itching. A rash appears, so quickly.

  More time passes, and the rash spreads. Quickly now. I’m on fire.

  “It’s not me,” I call out. “It’s not me—it’s…” I break off, coughing; green phlegm flies from my mouth. “You have to get help… It’s something else… Leaving us here, you’re killing us… Proper help…we need…they’re dying…you’re supposed to save us.”

  But they don’t listen.

  No one listens.

  And no one else comes to listen.

  There’s no one here.

  This is what evil feels like.

  She’s not here. She’s not here. She’s not here.

  “Poison!” my mother hollers.

  And I look for her, try to fight the heaviness that’s everywhere, that’s….

  I blink, but it slips away, the feeling—whatever it was and—

  My mother. Poison. Poison. Poison. The word thrums through me.

  And we’re moving… moving fast. Air’s rushing past me, fills my ears, makes them pop.

  I cry out, and a voice tells me it’ll be okay, but those words are a lie, I know that… I’ve always known that and….

  The floor is damp. No, more than damp. It’s wet. Wet…and it smells bad. My nostrils curl.

  I try to speak, but my lips won’t move. They feel heavy, too heavy. I move my tongue, but the energy to do it is too… The thought slips away, replaced by death. My death. I’m dying.

  We’re all dying.

  I see a skull as I close my eyes. It’s grinning at me, and its grin is garish, and it won’t leave me alone. It chases me, chases me until I’m running, and things are crashing into me. Fine wires spring around my body, bind me to a table.

  And the blue-eyed Seer is here, and I’m trying to shout to her but my tongue’s swollen, and my lips! I can’t open them, and—

  And I’m naked and people are laughing at me. Raleigh’s laughing at me, and he’s hauling me about, showing me to everyone, all the Enhanced.

  “It’s happening too quickly… The symptoms are accelerating and increasing….”

  Sweating. I’m sweating. Sweating so much and—and it’s pouring off me. I’m leaving a river behind as Raleigh drags me along and—

  And I blink, try to blink through the sweaty fog, because there’s something important about my death…something….

  “Shania.”

  Raleigh’s voice is here now—some time later? I’m not sure—but he speaks now, and his voice is different. And he speaks a lot. I wish he’d shut up, let me….

  “Shania, don’t let the evil take over again… Beat it, fight it, draw it out, and trample it. Come on, Shania—we made great progress before. You were doing so well. Don’t undo it.”

  Warm hands shake me, and I open my eyes. A bright light hovers above me. And something’s humming. I’m… Something soft…beneath me…a bed. But trying to work out anything else is too…too exhausting and….

  Remember! You have to remember!

  But I can’t, and the world slips into more voices and sounds, and I don’t know whether I’m awake or asleep.

  “Now?”

  “Yes.”

  “Get it ready.”

  “There’s availability for a full scan of the….”

  “… No.”

  People are running. I hear their footsteps, fast and heavy. Like a countdown to….

  Someone shouts.

  “Raleigh, Shania is barely responsive. Brain activity is unusually low—our records indicate that active use of Seer powers always causes an increase in these levels. How can she be controlling this?”

  “Scan her again. This must be a Seer power. She is doing it. She has to be. She and I are the only Seers here whose powers are strong enough to do this.”

  And I’m moving, sliding. Something flashes above me. A green light in the darkness.

  Time swallows everything up, swallows me up.

  I’m falling.

  More voices. A softer one, and a heavier one. And Raleigh’s.

  “No, I don’t care about the others. It’s her I want. We need her alive. Her death like this isn’t going to—”

  “Scanner’s ready.”

  “Do her first. If she’s not doing this then….”

  And then I’m moving. My bed’s moving. I watch as a series of bright lights run past me on the ceiling. Each one winks at me as the bed wheels me into darkness. Complete darkness.

  Then a red light flashes. I whimper as it dives at me, as it gets me. My eyes—it burns my eyes. Redness, everywhere, and….

  Something’s burning me. My fingers…my hands… I try to move, try to stop the burning, but it’s spreading up my arm…goes over the Zharat mark on the inside of my elbow, prickles my skin, like it’s injecting poison, more poison, and….

  And then there’s…movement…voices…mumbled and dark and laughing and playing…and we’re at the….

  I’m standing between my mother and my father, in the big house—the one we use to hold supplies in. Their hands are on my shoulders, and I turn, see them both beaming. Their smiles make me smile, and I can’t help but smile widely.

  Everyone’s smiling.

  “Isn’t she a darling?”

  “Have you thought of a name yet?”

  “She’s a fighter, look at those kickin’ legs.”

  The chattering is loud, and there’s music playing. Three finally got the machine to work then. He’s been working on the CD player for months, ever since our father found it in a skip, during a raid. Three will be pleased he’s fixed it. I smile and look for him, twisting my head, but everyone’s here, all together. All for the baby. And it’s hard to see.

  “Here, Seven, come and look at this.”

  Five appears at my side, then steers me away from our parents, to the side of the room, where Keelie, four years older than me at fourteen, holds a huge bag. She grins from ear to ear and pulls out a small pot of fine powder and a handful of small cosmetic tubes.

  “Elf found it all!” she yells, and then she clutches my arm, plasters some sort of thick paste around my eyes.

  I squirm backward, but there’s nowhere to go and—

  “You don’t want to look pretty?” Five asks. That’s when I notice she’s covered in glittery stuff. It’s even in her hair. “You won’t get a boyfriend unless you look pretty…” She turns around, then points at Finn. “See, he won’t like you.”

  My eyes travel to Finn. He’s not paying any attention to us—he mainly looks bored—but behind him is Corin, and he’s watching us, a look of disdain on his face.

  The music changes abruptly, and Five and Keelie start scream-dancing, waving their hands in the air. I take the opportunity to move back toward my mother. She’s still where I left her, though my father’s gone now.

  I squeeze through people. My mother sees me and reaches for me, smiling. And then—

  Then the light in her eyes changes. She falls. Motionless.

  And I try to reach her, try to—

  But everyone’s dancing and then…then when I reach her it’s a minute later, and she’s awake now and—

  “Enhanced!” My mother’s call is loud and shrill.

  The moment I hear the word, concrete fills my legs. My lungs turn to stone. Adrenaline pumps through my veins, trying to paralyze me, yet urging me to run as fast as I can. A rushing sound fills my ears. Too much sound, like someone screwing up a paper
bag in my eardrums. I can’t get away from it.

  But everyone’s trying—everyone’s moving, but there’s nowhere to go because—

  “They’re at the back door!”

  “They’re waiting out front too!”

  “Smash the windows!”

  Movement, to my left, and then there’s a tinkling sound and—

  Mirrors flash from the other side of the window, and someone screams.

  Rahn’s father flies across the room. I see his eyes: too white and sunken back into his face. Then he hits something and—

  More people bellow. Hands reach for me. And—

  “Get out!”

  The air gets thicker, heavier. I try to move, don’t understand… My throat tickles, and then I’m coughing, bending over. Everyone’s coughing, spluttering.

  Someone pulls a gun out near me, and the barrel catches my shoulder as they whirl it round.

  “Esther!”

  “Clear the front door!”

  My father appears, pushes me behind him, and then—

  Then the gunshots go off.

  “Get out!”

  The heat soars. I see flames—flames in the house. The house is on fire. For a second, I can’t move. Can’t do anything but stare at the flames.

  They’ve set our house on fire.

  People are screaming. The Untamed are screaming all around me. And the baby, Kayden and Faya’s baby is crying and screaming, and no one’s—

  “The windows!”

  More glass breaks, and the fire hisses. Heat squashes around my body, and I try to turn, but there’s smoke in here too, and it’s scratching my throat, my head, everything.

  “Get out the windows!”

  “No, not the door! They’re waiting out there!”

  Flames lick toward me. Their pattern is mesmerizing. So mesmerizing. Oranges and reds and deep blues, among the smoke.

  Someone screams, and I turn, my body jolting. The movement makes me cough…can’t stop coughing.

  The room is… I’m… Pain in my lungs.

  “Where’s Faya?”

  “She’s still in there, with the—”