The Legend

by Shey Stahl

  A quick pit stop, a good pass, triumphantly in the clear and then looking up and seeing that black and red number nine Ford coming for you. Then there was that feeling you knew that anything you and your team could do, Jameson and his Rowdy Ring of boys could do better.

  Jameson not only had the chops on the track but he with that razor sharp wit and an attitude that made you want to smack him and a numbing reputation in the garage, an imperial manner and that clout to back it. A rooted display of skill and an opportunist when faced with decisions. It had to do with what he did and he didn’t have to do because of who he was and how he did it.

  He was a rare racer and someone whose effect on the sport was far greater than any statistical contribution he made in the record books or even the points standing. Jameson came to the track, whether it is your local dirt track or the superspeedways of Talladega and Daytona, the attitude around the pits changed. Standing beside him, you could feel it, see it charging, growing restrained and powerful, respecting him as though everyone was waiting to see what he could do.

  Some drivers held him, and still do, with such awe, treating him with an almost fawning respect that they seemed to abandon their style of racing when around him and any hope of winning. You saw it in their faces knowing their chance at victory was now gone.

  Jameson is a driver that can rattle even the toughest. He’s a driver that is rare with a raw talent. He’s the racer fans follow when they prefer their hero’s flawed.

  Was he a hero? Without a doubt.

  Was he flawed? More than most liked to see.

  It was hard to grasp the fact that he was retiring and reading articles like this made it even harder because it was real. On the plane, after reading the article, I glanced over at him to see a man, a champion, a legend, relaxed with his decision. He was staring out the window of the plane watching the clouds as he usually did. Who knew what he was thinking at times like this but for me, I knew. He was more than likely thinking of racing and maybe even our night last night but not far from his thoughts was his decision to retire and what it meant to him.

  Four Wide Salute – Jameson

  It took me a while but come Michigan in late August, I had a conversation with Easton about his intentions with my daughter. It went something like, “You fuck up, you’re out of a ride next year and I’ll make sure you never walk again.”

  He was smart and responded with, “I respect your daughter and you. I would never do anything to hurt her.”

  Easton Levi was a good kid. At nineteen, he had a promising future in the Cup series and with Arie. They liked each other and that’s really all that mattered to me in the end, that and her safety. After getting to know him, he had her best intentions in mind.

  That’s all I could ask for.

  “You took that well.” Casten said to me when Easton left the hauler Friday night.

  “Yeah, she’s a big girl.” I said contemptuously. “I can’t tell her who to date.”

  Casten let out a laugh and a snort at the same. “He’s good to her. If he wasn’t, I’d kill him.”

  “I’m sure you would.”

  “Besides, Uncle Aiden and Uncle Spencer already scared the living shit out of the poor kid.”

  “What do you mean by kid? He’s older than you.”

  “Really?” he looked over at me after shoving piece of candy in his mouth and then threw the wrapper at me. “That’s all you heard?”

  “I’m just saying; it’s hard to call someone who is older than you, a kid.”

  “Do you have brain damage?”

  “No, do you?” I gave him a glare.

  “Well I’ve never been clinically tested.”

  “Hmmm...that explains a lot. And I have been tested, I’m fine.”

  Casten glared before smiling. “Stop distracting me head case. I had a point to coming in here.”

  “And what was that?”

  “That you’re now a grandpa?”

  “What?” I jumped up and then regretted it when I smacked my shoulder against the wall trying to move too quickly.

  “Settle down there old timer. You’ll break a hip.” I reached for my phone while Casten followed me outside the hauler.

  “Why didn’t they call?”

  “It happened quickly, I guess. I didn’t ask for details. Child birth isn’t something I’m real interested in,” he admitted. “Now the making process—”

  “Do you remember when you were ten and told me you were never having sex?”

  “Oh please…I was ten.” He looked at me like I was stupid. “That’s just obscene to think I would tell you the truth.”

  Sway was beaming when I finally found her inside my motor coach. “How come they didn’t call us?”

  She had the phone to her ear but moved it aside to speak. “Lily went into labor and the baby was born within an hour. They didn’t have time.”

  “I’d want out if I was him too.” Casten added as we stepped inside the motor coach. “Did you see that shit she eats? Who eats broccoli anyway? Unless you’re a turtle,”

  “Turtles don’t eat broccoli...” I gave Casten a strange look, as did Sway.

  “Well then, what do they eat?”

  “Fuck if I know, does it matter?”

  “Apparently, you think you know what they eat.”

  “Boys, stop it.” Sway interrupted us. “Let’s go see the baby.”

  I sighed hanging my head and she knew. “I can’t honey. I have an interview with ESPN in an hour and then I have a signing at the dealership.”

  She seemed sad for a moment but quickly shifted her expression change. “Well, we can go tomorrow then, after happy hour.”

  It was times like this that really made the decision to retire final for me.

  I wanted to be able to just go somewhere if I wanted and not have to worry about obligations. If I wanted to race, I raced. If I wanted to take my wife to Costa Rico tomorrow, I could. I didn’t have to worry about what my sponsor would think or if me getting injured would hurt my chances at the chase.

  Simplex wasn’t happy about the race in Knoxville that nearly killed the driver that made their companies millions over the years. But I was close enough with Marcus and Melissa that they understood why I raced sprint cars still. It didn’t stop them from asking that I not race anything other than the cup car until the season was out, but they did understand me.

  To me, sprint car racing was who I was. And that’s when I understood completely that what happened in Knoxville had nothing to do with me. Regardless of the whole Grady issue, my dad died doing what he loved. Not many people can say that happened to them. He didn’t suffer months of battling an aggressive cancer or die in a car accident going to a shit job he hated.

  He was doing what made him Jimi Riley.

  Me, Sway, Casten, and Arie took off to Mooresville from Michigan to see Axel and Lily in the hospital, oh and the new addition.

  Lily looked exhausted as did Axel. He’d been up all night making sure she and the baby had everything they needed and then he had to leave for the start of the Great Northern Tour in Grand Forks Michigan.

  Justin was there in the room holding the baby when we got there. He wasn’t giving him up until Sway pouted and basically stole him.

  “What’s his name?” I asked peeking over my wife’s shoulder at him. He looked just like Axel did when he was born—even had the signature rusty mess of hair.

  Axel and Lily looked over at Justin leaning against the far wall. Justin smiled. “Jack Anthony Riley.” Lily said softly.

  Not many people knew this but Justin had a twin brother when he was born but he died when they were just a few months old. And his name was Jack.

  “That’s beautiful you guys.” Arie gushed when she walked in the room. “He’s adorable!”

  “You look like shit.” Casten told Axel who really did look exhausted. “But you look beautiful.” He leaned down and kissed the top of Lily head.

  “Thanks Casten.” Lily said smiling up
at him.

  “Stop that—don’t touch my wife.” Axel said pushing Lily and Casten apart.

  I was sure I was going to separate the boys when Sway motioned for me to come over and then handed the baby over to me. Since our kids were little, I hadn’t held a baby.

  Nervously, I reached out and cradled my arms as she placed him gently in my arms. I looked down at him and he looked up at me. “I’m your grandpa.” I told him softly and kissed his forehead.

  Ugh, that sounds so old.

  “How about we just are his aunt and uncle?” Sway whispered in my ear.

  He sneezed.

  Sway, being the witty shit I’d always known my wife to be, said, “Aw...can you believe it baby, he sneezes and blinks.”

  I just laughed and held Jack close to my chest. He whimpered the same way Axel did and snuggled into my embrace.

  Axel looked between me and Sway. “Huh?”

  Sway and Justin started laughing before Sway ratted me out. “When you were born Axel...your dad was utterly amazed that you were real.”

  “What did he think I’d be?”

  Casten began to answer with, “He probably—”

  “All right,” I spoke up before he’d say something inappropriate. “I knew he was real. I just didn’t expect him to be so...active...I guess.”

  I lost track of what they were saying when Jack followed me with his gray glassy eyes. He watched every movement I made like I was a shiny toy he’d never seen before. To be fair, I stared at him just as closely, remembering my kids when they were this small. It felt like it was just yesterday.

  It’s a different feeling when you see one of your grandchildren. I understood why my parents and Charlie looked at Axel the way they did when he was born or any of the grandchildren.

  You watch your children from the very beginning. Wondering all along what they’ll be like when they’re older. Then they have children. I don’t know that I can express the feeling I had but it was intense.

  There’s something beautiful about the beginning of life. They’ve done nothing wrong, never lied, never had their heart broken. They haven’t had to deal with death, or the pressures of life, they’re just new—new to the world.

  They make everything in the world seem so minuscule compared to their precious existence.

  I watched my mom carefully when she came by the hospital to visit with Emma and Lexi.

  They brought a shit load of baby stuff but I was more distracted by the pure joy on my mother’s face. I hadn’t seen her happier than the last time I saw her with my dad.

  She saw me holding Jack, her eyes lit up like a Christmas tree and she was beside me in an instant. “Oh Jameson...” she gasped covering her mouth with her hand. “He’s so beautiful.”

  Looking at him now, I could see some of Lily’s features in his chin and nose but the rest was identical to Axel.

  The girls were beginning to hover imperiously so I gave Jack to my mom. They shifted their hovering to her.

  Mom was hesitant in her movements for a moment. Maybe she was afraid he’d cry. But he didn’t.

  Mom had a way with babies and her first great grandchild wasn’t any different. Though she liked to say Logan’s daughter, Madison, was her great grandchild, Jack was technically the first by blood.

  My mom looked at me again. “I watched Axel win the other night and he did the same wing dance Jimi used to where he bowed to the crowd then rested his head on the wing for a moment.”

  Nodding, I remember watching him on SPEED the other night and witnessing that myself. The World of Outlaws was doing a lot to keep Jimi’s memory alive with reverting to a 3-wide salute as opposed to the standard 4-wide salute prior to the feature. But it was things like Axel imitating dad’s wing dance that provided us the best comfort that he would forever be remembered for his contributions to the series.

  I found a place in the corner, next to Casten and watched the girls coo over the new baby.

  Casten chuckled wrinkling his nose a little. “How pathetic,” and then his once disgusted face turned amused and mischievous. “I wonder if they’ll let me borrow him.”

  “No!” Axel barked from his place beside Lily. “You are not using him like you do to Madison.”

  “You didn’t use Logan’s daughter as bait, did you?” I asked my overly confident son.

  “Pleeeeease,” he rolled his eyes. “Like I need to use a baby to get girls,”

  Sway stepped beside me wrapping her arms around my waist. She had tears in her eyes and whispered. “She’s so happy.”

  I glanced over toward my mom sitting in a chair holding Jack with Emma and Alley standing over her looking down at him. She really is happy.

  Kissing my wife’s forehead I whispered back with, “I wish they were here to see this.”

  And I said they because not only was my dad not here but hers wasn’t either.

  A new life was added but we still felt the void of the ones that were gone.

  I bowed my head, looking at the tile floor beneath us as Sway ran her hand up and down my back in an attempt to comfort. Nothing would bring them back but the memories were good ones. That we had, we had the memories.

  And now, new ones were being created. Like watching my first born son, hold his.

  Axel was beaming with delight when I said goodbye as we headed back to the track for the race tomorrow. I threw an arm around him and pulled him into a tight hug. “I love you buddy. I’m proud of you.” I whispered so only he would hear.

  He had to know that I wasn’t talking about him becoming a father. I was talking about him in general and everything he had accomplished.

  I felt him chuckle softly before his breath caught in his throat and I was sure he was on the verge of tears. “I love you too, dad.”

  29. Inside Line – Axel

  Inside Line – The shortest line around the track. Also, the part of the track that is closest to the infield. On some tracks, depending on the grooves, this may be the ideal line in a race.

  Becoming a dad was strange. Becoming a husband and having someone rely on me was strange too but then you add another human being depending on you, its nerve wracking.

  I found myself calling and texting Lily multiple times a day just to make sure they were all right and didn’t need anything. Thankfully Lexi and Arie were doting Aunts and spent as much time with her as they could. I also tend to believe it had something to do with Jack. He was the sweetest little boy.

  I never imagined I would love him so much but when I heard his first cry and then he looked up at me, I was hooked. I was now one of those dad’s that carried pictures in his wallet, bragged and had tons of videos on my phone of him just breathing.

  Casten called me a pussy and asked if I still had balls but I think deep down he showed tact. I frequently noticed him holding him as well when he had the chance. And yes, there were the occasions when he used my new born son for the sake of getting a woman’s attention.

  My grandma seemed to be the most affected by Jack’s presence. She spent hours holding him, making blankets and watching his every movement. It was nice to see her so happy again. I worried that after grandpa’s passing she would just give up like my great grandmother did but she didn’t. She still traveled around with us, helped with fan clubs, made sure all of her kids were taking care of themselves — just being the mother she always was to everyone.

  She really was the racers tape that held our families together.

  The months went by and soon Lily and Jack were traveling with me just as I did with my parents.

  Willie and Tommy worked together as the crew chief and the combination was exactly what we needed that year. I questioned their sanity more times than not but somehow the combination of their brains worked wonders on the setups and adjustments. By the time the World Finals rolled around in November, I had no doubts I’d won the championship.

  I would like to say I never second guessed myself but I did. I wasn’t Jameson Riley.

  I was Axe
l Charles Riley. The kid that occasionally questioned his skills but I knew I had them. That championship proved that. I may not drive like he did or push the car to the limits the way he could and hang on to it but I did it.

  I set out to win the championship and I did.

  That’s all that mattered to me.

  Like grandma tells me, “It doesn’t matter how you get there, just that you do.”

  She was talking to Spencer at the time but still, the words could be applied to anything.

  All that mattered was that I did it and I did it my way.

  Now it was time to head to Homestead with the rest of our family to watch my dad’s last race. Deep down it bothered me that he was hanging it up because for so long we shared this one thing together. Racing, now what would that mean?

  Inside Line – Jameson

  Leading up to my last race in Homestead was nerve-racking. It was hard to think that in a few days, the life that we had lived for so long would be changing again.

  I wasn’t a contender for the championship since our first half of the season was driven by a back-up driver. Not that Easton didn’t do well, he did. But it wasn’t enough to put us in championship contention.

  Remember when I said I’d give it everything I had, well I most definitely did that last race.

  I really enjoyed Homestead, always had. But then again, that was before my accident and whether I wanted to face it or not, I had some setbacks physically from it that caused me to feel uncomfortable at times. Homestead wasn’t any different.

  Once the physical therapy was done, it took some time for me to really feel comfortable in the car again without the occasional cramping or aching midway through the race. The problem was my shoulder.

  Dave, my personal trainer/physician these days that traveled along with our team and not only helped me but he helped the crew members if they needed it on the weekends. So he made this device that I wore inside the car that helped take the pressure I felt off my left shoulder on the longer races.