by S. E. Brown
As for my health, I was diagnosed with a rare heart condition about a year ago. The doctors aren’t quite sure what is going to happen to me, how healthy or sick I will be, or even for how long my heart will continue to beat.
The reason I didn’t tell you was because I didn’t want to put a damper on what was going on with your life. You had just bought your house, were looking for a new job and you had friends you were spending time with – just as you should have been. And quite frankly, I wanted you to remember me as a strong, healthy person. Not weak and frail like I am bound to become.
I can hear your argument – I helped you when you needed it so why wouldn’t I allow you to do that same? The truth is, I don’t have an answer for you other than … I wanted you to live your life, Madison. I didn’t want you to put anything on hold for me or my illness.
Today, I’m writing you and I feel good. I feel strong. But I know tomorrow could be different. The most important thing you need to know is - I love you, Madison. Please don’t think my actions, or inactions, are sending any different message than that.
You were an absolute blessing in my life. I thank God every day Mrs. Erickson called and asked if I would help you. What an amazing gift she gave me that day!
You have grown into a beautiful, smart, strong and talented woman, Madison. It gives me great joy to know I had a little to do with that.
Please don’t stay mad at me for too long. I did what I thought was best. I realize it may take a while for you to see that, but I promise you, I was only trying to make things a little easier for you.
I love you, Madison Quinn. And no matter what happens from here, that will always remain true. Always.
Ellie
Madison stared once again at Ellie’s name on the bottom of the page. There was no way she could have ever expected to hear from her again. For six years she’d wondered why Ellie hadn’t told her she was sick, and for six years, the answers had been waiting for her to find.
Declan was laying on the bed playing with his phone trying to be invisible and give Madison her space. He looked up when he noticed movement and saw her standing at the foot of the bed, tears rolling down her cheeks.
“She didn’t tell me she was sick because she didn’t want me to put my life on hold for her.” She stood there and the longer the idea ruminated in her mind, the angrier she got. “She took me in when I had NO one. When I was at my absolute lowest in my life. But she felt she had to protect me because she was sick? How does that even make sense?”
Madison dropped the letter as her hands went to her face and the tears started again.
Declan slid off the bed and took her in his arms and held her, letting her cry.
Chapter 19
Madison woke to the steady rhythm of Declan’s heart beneath her ear. She was nestled into the crook of his arm, her head on his chest, an arm wrapped around his waist and a leg draped over one of his.
He had laid her down in bed the night before as she continued to cry and held her. Madison wasn’t even sure for how long her tears fell, but she was grateful Declan had been there with her.
A soft smile crossed her lips as she thought about how wonderful he’d been about everything. She slowly brought her hand to his chest and ran her fingers across it ever-so-slightly, drawing circles and other patterns. She simply enjoyed the feel of him beside her. That, too, was entirely new for her.
“Careful, you bring that hand any lower and you’re going to be in for a surprise.”
Madison chuckled quietly as she continued to tease him, running her hand up to his shoulder, over his heart, down around his waist and finally over the boxer briefs he was wearing. Slowing her movements, she gently covered his cock, already awake and hard. “You mean this surprise?”
“Hmm-mmm.” His voice was low and incredibly sexy.
While her hand continued to slowly caress the hardness beneath it, she turned her head until her lips found his jaw and placed several small kisses along it.
Declan shifted slowly to his side, not wanting her hand to stop what it was doing, so he could look at her.
“You are so damn beautiful,” he whispered, then curled his arm, bringing her lips within his reach.
She kissed him with slow, lingering touches. Her tongue slid out to caress his lips, asking for silent admittance, to which he quickly obliged.
They continued to kiss, the heat building between them. Madison broke the connection between their lips and moved to straddle his legs. Her fingers slid beneath the fabric of his t-shirt and lazily traced the bumps of his abs before she leaned down for another passionate kiss.
Needing to feel her skin against his, Declan wrapped an arm around her waist and quickly sat up, moving her back on his legs. He grabbed the neck of his shirt and pulled it over his head and tossed it to the floor. He felt Madison shiver as he looked into her eyes again.
He leaned forward, searching for her lips as his fingers found the hem of her shirt. Pulling up, he broke the kiss so the clothing could pass between them.
Wrapping his arms around her waist, he brought her now bare chest to his lips and sought first one, then her other nipple, sucking and licking them, loving the soft sounds she made as he did.
“We’re going to have to be quiet.” She moaned as his lips popped her nipple from his mouth.
“I can do quiet.” He grinned up at her as he laid back onto the bed. “Take my cock out.”
A wicked smile spread across Madison’s lips as she lowered her hands to his underwear and slid his length from beneath the fabric. She ran her fingers from top to bottom and licked her lips.
“Nuh-uh,” he said quickly, shaking his head.
“What?” she asked, trying to feign innocence as she started to move her body to the side so she could take him in her mouth.
With a gentleness, he reached for her arm and stopped her. “I love those lips, but I want to be inside you. Now.”
Madison loved the urgency in his voice. She reached down to her panties and pulled them to the side, moving her body back on top of his. She slid her pussy along the length of his cock, causing them both to moan.
“In. I want in,” he demanded as one hand released her and grabbed his cock, moving it to her opening.
Feeling the same urgency, Madison raised her hips to give him room, and when she felt the tip of him at her entrance, slowly lowered herself onto him.
“Oh, fuuuuuck,” he moaned. “You feel so fucking good.”
Madison leaned down, resting her body of top of his. She took his hands in hers, interlacing their fingers while she moved them over their heads.
She rocked her hips forward and back, forward and back, relishing the feel of him sliding in and out of her and the friction it caused between her nipples and his chest.
Her mouth descended, her tongue seeking his. They kissed, him sucking on her tongue, her finding momentum as she moved her hips faster and faster.
Breaking the kiss, she sat up, feeling him slide even deeper.
Declan let go of her hands and brought them to her waist to help her movements. “Fuck, I’m not going to last. Are you ready?”
He removed a hand from her waist and brought it to his mouth, wet a finger, then lowered his hand to her clit. He rubbed and flicked it until he heard her breath change. She was close.
“Come with me, baby. I want to feel you come.”
Madison closed her eyes and focused on the feel of him sliding in and out of her, his finger on her most sensitive spot. When he squeezed it, just the slightest bit, she felt herself fall over the edge.
Declan grunted, his own orgasm shooting through him. Madison could feel his cock twitch inside her.
She looked down at him as her hips slowed.
Lowering herself she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him gently, finally laying her head on his chest as they both found their breath again.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“You still want to head to the shore today? Go see Ryan?” Declan asked.
“Yeh. I just sent her a text to see if she was around today.”
As if on cue, Madison’s phone dinged.
Ryan: I am. What’s up?
Madison: I was thinking of heading your way. Think we could grab dinner tonight? Just the two of us?
Ryan: Sure. Is everything okay?
Madison: Yeh, I just need to talk to you.
Ryan: You know I worry when you do this – are you really okay?
Madison: :) Yes. I promise.
Ryan: Okay. I’ll see you in a few hours then.
Madison: I’m in Wilmington – I’ll explain later. Not sure when I’m leaving but I’ll text you.
Ryan: Okay. Drive carefully.
“Ryan is good for tonight. I’ll crash at their place.”
“Okay.” He smiled as he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close for a kiss. “I’m just a phone call away if you need me.”
“I know.” She was beginning to really like that feeling. Declan. Having him near. She never thought having someone say the words he just did would bring her comfort, but that’s exactly what they did.
There was a light knock on the door.
“Looks like it’s time for breakfast.” Declan grinned as his stomach growled.
Madison walked to the door and opened it. It was weird knowing the person standing in front of her was her daughter. It was a concept that was going to take her a while to get used to.
“You guys ready for some grub?” Obviously Issy was hungry as well.
“Yes!” Declan nearly shouted from somewhere behind Madison, causing the girls to laugh.
They ended up at one of those diners that looked like a complete dive but had the ultimate breakfast food. Bacon and eggs were hard to screw up, but this place was just mouthwatering.
“Issy?” Madison asked to get her attention. “Would you be okay riding back with Declan?”
“Yeh, sure. What’s up?” It really wasn’t a big deal, but she figured they would all be going back to Charlotte.
“I’m going to head to the Outer Banks after breakfast. I need to talk to Ryan.”
Issy nodded. “You going to tell her about me?”
Madison smiled. “I am.”
“Okay. How long do you think you’ll stay there?”
“Probably just tonight. I can text you and let you know.”
Issy nodded with a smile. Knowing her mom could text her whenever she wanted to was as foreign to her as her standing in the hotel hallway had been to Madison.
“Have you told your mom yet?” Madison asked, half afraid of the answer. This woman had taken her child and raised her. Molded her. Loved her and cared for her. The last thing Madison wanted was for her to think she was trying to take her place.
“Not yet. I figured when I got home tonight I would have more time and could call then.”
“If …” Madison paused. “If they want to talk to me or meet me, I would be okay with that.”
Issy’s eyes lit up. “Okay.”
Chapter 20
Madison had more than four hours of mostly two-lane country roads and logging trucks that wouldn’t go fast enough to think about the last couple days and her upcoming talk with Ryan. It was a pretty drive, and thankfully her mind was far more focused than it had been on the unplanned trip to Wilmington.
She knew her friend well enough to know Ryan wouldn’t be mad that she had never told her about the baby. Disappointed, maybe.
Pulling into the driveway, she noticed Cody’s Silverado was missing and sighed in relief. She loved the guy, but she needed some girl-time with Ryan.
Madison knocked and immediately opened the door.
“Ry? You here?”
“In the office,” she heard her yell from the other side of the house.
Madison looked down to see two blurry masses of fur running at her. “Hey guys!” She bent down to pet Wrigley and Berkley, Ryan and Cody’s furry babies. Each dog picked a side and anxiously wagged their tail while she took a moment to pet and love on them.
Movement caught her eye and Madison looked up to see Ryan walking towards her with tears on her cheeks.
“Ry? What’s wrong?”
Ryan didn’t immediately answer, which made Madison’s mind immediately jump to the worst possible scenario.
“It is Cody? Is he okay?”
Ryan shook her head. “No, Cody’s fine. It’s Jaxon. He’s in the hospital.”
Madison looked to her friend. While Jaxon was definitely not her favorite person, Madison knew he meant something to Ryan. She put her purse on the floor and shooed the dogs out of the way.
“Come on.” She took Ryan’s hand and led her to the living room. “What happened?”
“He got into a fight.”
Madison looked at Ryan and waited for her to continue, knowing there had to be more to the story.
“He was at a club when it happened. When the police arrived, they kept everyone inside until they could finish their questioning.”
“Talk about a buzz kill,” Madison mumbled under her breath. “So what happened?”
“The police said there were witnesses that saw him drinking.”
“And we know he turns into instant douchebag when he does that,” Madison mumbled again.
“Sounds like he was trying to hit on the wrong girl. Her boyfriend, husband, whatever, didn’t like it and confronted him. Jaxon, having absolutely no common sense when he drinks, apparently stood up to him and got into a pissing match with the guy.
“I don’t know who threw the first punch, not that it really matters, but the other guy must have had some sort of training because he knew just exactly how to hurt him.”
“How bad is he?”
“Sounds like a pretty bad concussion, a couple broken ribs and his left leg was broken in two places.”
“Ouch.”
“Yeh, the doctors were surprised it wasn’t worse.”
“But he’s gonna be okay, right?”
“They think so. They had to do surgery on his leg to set the bone, and it’ll be a long recovery, but they think he’ll be alright. I was just on the phone with his mom. She thought I’d want to know.”
“That’s kind weird, isn’t it? You guys haven’t been together in a long time. Why would she put you on the list to call?”
“Apparently Jaxon told her we were still really good friends.”
“Well, isn’t that interesting.”
“And,” Ryan paused, “he also told her I broke up with him.”
“I supposed that is true, but does she know why?”
“She didn’t before, but she does now.”
Madison laughed. “Something tells me his ass kicking isn’t over for the day.”
“She wasn’t very happy with what she heard, that’s for sure.”
“I’d say, ‘Poor Jaxon,’ but the guy probably got what he deserved.”
“Mad, come on…”
“What? He hurt you pretty fucking bad, Ry. I would’ve liked to be the one who put him in the hospital. Maybe I should send the other guy a thank you note.”
“That’s awful.” Ryan couldn’t help herself from chuckling as she pictured Madison beating the crap out of Jaxon. He wouldn’t have known what hit him.
“In all seriousness, Ry, maybe this will teach him a lesson.”
“Maybe…”
“So, where’s your sex-on-a-stick?”
“I sent him over to Luke’s house to play so we could have some girl time together.”
Madison raised her eyebrows with a laugh. “To play?”
Ryan just shrugged. “Who knows what they’re doing - probably just watching a game or something.”
Nodding, Madison agreed. “You’re probably right.”
“I know you told me everything was fine, but I was worried when you texted. I told him he needed to go so we could be alone.” The thought that Madison was there for a reason popped back into Ryan’s mind. “Are you gonna tell me what’s going on?
”
“You sure you want to get into that right now? It’s kind of major.”
“Umm… yeh.” Telling Ryan it was “major” was probably the worst thing Madison could have done if she wanted to wait until later to talk about it.
“Can we get a drink first? I kinda need one.”
“Sure. I guess that eliminates one of the possibilities. You’re not pregnant.”
Madison laughed.
If you only knew…
“No, I’m definitely not pregnant.”
Ryan grabbed two bottles of Strongbow from the refrigerator and turned back to the living room. Madison raised her eyebrows when she was what was in her hands. “I sent Cody to the store before he went to Luke’s. I had a feeling you were going to need one of these.”
Madison took a bottle from Ryan and popped the top off. “Have I told you lately how much I love you?” She raised the bottle to her lips and took a long drink.
“Not nearly enough,” she answered with a soft smile. “Come on, out with it. Now that you have liquid courage, you need to tell me what’s going on.”
“It’s not liquid courage.”
Ryan gave her “the look” that told her she knew Madison was completely full of shit.
“Okay, maybe a little.”
They flopped onto the couch and Madison wracked her brain trying to find the best way to tell Ryan. Did she start with her parents kicking her out? Or going to live with Ellie? Ryan knew about both of those things, she just didn’t know the whole story. Or should she start with Issy showing up on her doorstep?
“I can see the wheels turning.” Ryan took another drink from the bottle. “Just start at the beginning.”
So she did. Madison finally explained the whole story behind her parents kicking her out.
“You were pregnant?” Ryan swallowed. “At fifteen?”
Madison nodded, knowing she wasn’t being judged but empathized with.
“God, Mad…”
Madison continued, explaining how Mrs. Erickson arranged for her to live with Ellie. She talked about the pregnancy and how alone she felt, but how loving and caring Ellie had been, and why she always called Ellie her lifesaver.