by Nina Levine
“Havoc,” she grumbled as she wrapped her legs around me. “I want you all the way in.”
I grinned. Fuck, I couldn’t help myself. I loved the way she always wanted more from me. Pushing all the way in, I said, “Happy?”
“I am now,” she replied as her muscles contracted around me.
Her sass pushed all my buttons and I grabbed her wrists and spread her arms out across the bed, pinning her down. Pulling out of her, I then thrust in hard. As she cried out, I demanded, “You want it harder?”
“Yes.” Her answer was more of a plea.
I pulled out and slammed into her again, over and over until she squeezed her eyes shut and clung to me.
Our bodies moved as one while I fucked her.
Hard and rough.
When we came, it was together and it was fucking beautiful.
I finally sank into the awareness that sex with Carla was a whole new experience.
It wasn’t just pleasure.
It was so much more than that.
24
Carla
I eyed the woman exiting her car outside Havoc’s house. It was his ex. She was making her way up the path to the front door and he was in the kitchen on the phone to the hospital.
When she knocked on the door, I took great delight in answering it. Her wide eyes and surprise were enough to make my day. Hell, they made my fucking month. “It’s you again,” she said with scorn. Her eyes darted to try to see into the house.
“Yep, me again. Sorry, I’ve forgotten your name.”
I hadn’t.
She didn’t need to know that.
“Kelly,” she retorted, trying to push past me.
I pushed back.
No way was she getting inside this house.
“Havoc’s busy,” I said before adding, “He’s actually just setting up our new sex swing. Can I pass on a message? No, scratch that. Havoc made it pretty clear to me that he never wanted to see you again.” I waved at her before shutting the door in her face.
“That was impressive.” Havoc’s voice sounded from behind me and I turned to find him with his arms crossed over his chest while he watched me with amusement.
I grinned. “That was kinda fun. It serves her right for interfering with us last time.”
He raised his brows. “A sex swing?”
Before I could reply to that, Kelly banged on the door. “Havoc! I know you’re in there. Let me in.”
Irritation flashed across his face and he took the few steps to the door. Pulling it open, he said, “I’m in here for everyone but you. Now fuck off.”
I loved the way he didn’t mince his words. I also loved that he stood his ground with the woman who'd ripped his heart out. He hadn’t told me a lot yet, but I knew enough to know that.
“Are you seriously choosing her over me? She’s not even your type.” Her words were mean and I wondered what she meant about his type.
“How the fuck do you know what my type is? It’s been two years since we broke up. A lot’s changed in that time.” His fury surrounded him and I was glad I wasn’t on the receiving end of it.
“Types don’t change,” she said. Geez, she never fucking gave up.
“You know what I realised, Kelly? I fuckin’ realised just this week that the reason I didn’t have a woman was because my compass was all out of fuckin’ whack. It was leading me to the wrong type. Thank Christ I made a pit stop one night in a bar I made a habit of never visiting. I found my type all right and she’s a fuckin’ angel. Now step the fuck back so I can close this goddamn door and go and show my woman how fuckin’ thankful I am that you’re a greedy bitch who decided I wasn’t good enough for her.”
He slammed the door in her face and turned to me, his face a mask of intent. My heart raced in my chest at his words. About me. Warmth flooded my body and I smiled at him.
I was lost for words after his declaration. I went with the first thing that came to mind. “That was a lot of fucks in those sentences.”
His eyes watched me with an intensity that caused my lady bits to start dancing with joy. “You good with those fucks?”
“I’m good with those fucks.”
“And with everything else I just said?”
I stepped into his space so our bodies were touching. “Oh, I am more than good with everything you just said. I’m particularly good with that part about showing me how thankful you are that—”
His lips crashed down onto mine and he did more than show me how thankful he was.
He brought heaven to my goddamn door.
Again.
* * *
Havoc dropped me off at home on his way to the hospital. I had to start thinking about my studies and a new job. My life plan had been altered in more ways than one and I wanted to spend some time alone working through it all in my mind. Havoc planned to spend the day with his father. He promised to call me later.
“That you, Carla?” my mum called out as I opened the front door.
“Yeah.”
I found her in the kitchen filling the slow cooker.
“A young man dropped by earlier to see you. He said he knew you from school and wanted to discuss a business idea with you.” She passed me a piece of paper with his name and number.
“Wow,” I mumbled as I read the name on the paper. Looking back up at her, I said, “This guy was a year ahead of me and started his own design business when he finished. It’s doing well. Really well. I wonder if he wants to offer me a job?” This could be the answer to at least one of my problems.
“Nash dropped by to see you this morning also.”
“Shit. Did you tell him where I was?”
“I’m not going to lie for you, Carla. I told him the truth.”
“Fair enough. I’m going to go see him today. Try to get him to see my point of view.”
“That’s a good idea. Invite him over for dinner if you want. I’m making enough.”
“Is there enough for Havoc if he can come?”
She nodded. “Absolutely.”
I gave her a kiss and swiped my car keys off the table. “I’ll let you know who’s coming later today,” I promised as I headed outside to my car.
Hope swirled through me. Maybe I could convince Nash to give Havoc a go. We didn’t need his blessing to carry on with seeing each other, but it would make life easier for everyone.
* * *
“Hey Carla,” J greeted me when I arrived at the Storm clubhouse. He was on his way inside when I pulled into the car park. He stopped and waited for me.
“Hi, J.”
“You looking for Nash?”
I nodded as I eyed the building. It was rare that I visited the place. “Yeah, can you see if he’s in for me? I’ll just wait out here.”
He gestured for me to come in. “You don’t have to wait out here.”
I shook my head. “I want to have a conversation with him and I think it’s best to do it in private.”
“No worries. I’ll go find him.”
A few minutes later, Nash walked towards me with a grim look on his face.
“Hey, you,” I greeted him, trying to keep a friendly tone in my voice.
“Mum tell you I called over to see you this morning?” Yeah, he was pissed.
“She did. I was gonna come see you anyway. We need to talk.”
“You know where I stand on this, Carla.”
My hope faltered.
This was going to be harder than I thought.
I dropped my gaze and stared at the ground while trying to get my thoughts together. This had to come out right because I was sure I only had one shot at changing his mind.
He reached for my chin and lifted my face. For the first time since this had all started, I saw care there. “Talk to me.” His voice had softened and while I briefly wondered where that had come from, I didn’t want to ponder it for too long. God only knew how long it would last.
“Dad leaving and never wanting anything to do with me caused a shitl
oad of insecurities for me, Nash. I’m sure you realise that, but I’m not sure you realise just how deep they run. I promised myself a long time ago that I’d never end up with a man like our father. I wanted a nice guy, a steady man who would never let me down. The trouble was I never believed myself worthy of that, so I kept choosing the wrong men. When I met Havoc, it honestly was only supposed to be a quick fling. A biker wasn’t in my life plan, no offence.”
Listening intently, he nodded at that.
“I know you’ve said Havoc is violent and dangerous for me, and for sure, I’ve seen his temper. But he’s never once shown me any violence. In fact, he’s gone out of his way to give me the opposite. He also gives me honesty in a way that no other man ever has. He respects me and doesn’t tell me I have to change who I am. And he’s super protective of me.” I paused, waiting for him to say something, but he didn’t, so I continued, “Nash, you’ve seen me with other guys. You know that I’m a mess most of the time if I’m dating someone. Do I look like a mess at the moment? Do I seem unhappy and insecure?”
I watched him closely to gauge his reaction and I could have sworn I saw conflict work its way across his face. But in the end he said, “Carla, you haven’t known Havoc as long as I have and you haven’t seen the shit I’ve seen. I know you think you know him, but you don’t. And he might be giving you all those things now, but we all know relationships start off with best behaviour. It won’t last.”
My mouth fell open. I’d stood there and been honest with him and all he could give me in return was that? “You’re not willing to even stop and consider what I’ve said?”
His jaw clenched. “I did, but it doesn’t change anything.”
“Oh, my God, you frustrate me, Nash! You always think you know best. Let me tell you, you don’t know best on this.”
He stiffened. “You’re not going to stop seeing him, are you?”
I shook my head. “No.”
“Fuck, Carla. You never fuckin’ learn when it comes to men. I just don’t want to see you get hurt again.”
“I’ve heard you loud and clear. If he hurts me, I’ll own that. But can you at least give us the chance to see where this goes without harassing him?”
He stood there fuming and I thought for sure he was going to continue arguing with me. In the end, though, he jabbed his finger at me and declared, “If he so much as causes you one tear, he’s fuckin’ dead.”
With that, he turned and left. I stayed rooted to the spot, stunned at what he’d said. Just before he disappeared inside, I yelled out, “Dinner tonight at Mum’s. You and Velvet are invited.”
He didn’t turn back or stop, but rather nodded and said, “We’ll be there.”
I failed to mention that Havoc was invited.
Tonight would either be an epic failure or new beginnings for all of us.
25
Havoc
“Thank you for coming tonight. Your dad’s going to be all right without you, isn’t he?” Carla said as we entered her mum’s house for dinner.
“Yeah, Yvette’s with him at the hospital tonight. I spent most of day with him before visiting the clubhouse. He’s had enough of me for today.” The doctors were busy tweaking his medication, so until they were happy with that, they weren’t letting him go home. Dad was still pissed at me for his hospital stay.
“Uh, I need to confess something to you,” she said as she halted our progress down the hallway. Voices filtered from the kitchen and I was fairly sure of what she was about to tell me.
I raised my brows. “Keep going.”
Biting her lip and looking anything but confident, she said, “Nash is here. I didn’t want to tell you in case you said no to coming. I think tonight might give you guys an opportunity to move past where you’re at.” Her words rushed out in a nervous mess and I fought not to smile at them. What she didn’t realise was that I’d say yes to almost anything if it involved being in the same room as her. I could try to deny it, but I was fucking done for where she was concerned.
“Don’t hold your breath, darlin’. Nash can be a stubborn asshole when he wants to be. But I’ll be on my best behaviour.”
She reached up and gently touched the lingering bruise near my eye. “God, I’ll bloody punch him myself if he does this again.”
I grinned. “I don’t doubt it.”
Grabbing my hand, she said, “Okay let’s do this.”
I squeezed her hand and followed her into the kitchen where everyone was. When we entered the room, the talking died down as all eyes came to us.
“Carla. Havoc.” Carla’s mother gave us both a smile and motioned for us to sit with them. Nash’s eyes met mine and I jerked my chin, but the only response I received was his continuing glare.
“Nash,” Carla said in a low voice and I figured that was her warning to him. He simply threw a glare her way also.
I greeted Linda who then introduced Nash’s girlfriend, Velvet.
And then we attempted to play happy fucking families.
* * *
“Did you contact that young man who came over looking for you?” Linda asked Carla as she served dinner. She’d cooked roast beef and vegetables and it looked like it might be the highlight of my day. The other highlight was the fact that Carla’s mother was easy to get along with.
“Yes!” Carla exclaimed and I took in her excitement. We hadn’t had much time to talk during the day so I had no clue what this was about. “He offered me a job.”
“Doing what, darlin’?” I asked.
“Jack and I attended the same college and he loves the designs I did for various projects. He wants me to come on board as a designer in a new company he’s building. It’s an online business. He’s ready to go now so I’ll start working on designs tomorrow. The best thing is that I can work from home.”
“That’s great, Carla,” Velvet said, throwing her a smile. Nash’s woman had impressed me so far. She’d welcomed me without any bitching and had tried to pull Nash into line when he’d started to grumble some shit at me.
“What about your studies?” Nash asked.
Carla’s smile seeped from her face. “I’m going to do that subject again next semester, but I’m not looking forward to it because I’ll probably have the same teacher.”
My skin crawled with anger at the mention of that asshole. I’d asked her for his information a few times and she’d fobbed me off and told me Nash would help her. I was sure she hadn’t given the info to Nash either, though. “If you get that same teacher, he and I will be having words.”
“I’m with Havoc on that,” Nash said, surprising the fuck out of me. “And while we’re on that subject, you need to be giving me his name regardless. I’d like to give him a piece of my mind.”
The smile returned to Carla’s face. “Wow, something you guys have in common. Who would have thought, huh, Nash?”
He scowled but didn’t respond.
“Right, eat up before it goes cold,” Linda instructed as I made a mental note to force that information from Carla.
Linda was a hell of a cook. The roast was one of the best I’d ever had and that was saying something because my mother had been a great cook.
My enjoyment of her food was cut short when a loud bang sounded from outside, as if there was someone in the yard.
Nash and I pushed our chairs back and stood in unison. I ignored the glare he gave me and followed him outside through the back door.
“Stay there and don’t come outside,” he ordered the girls over his shoulder.
There was no light in the back yard but plenty of noise. “Definitely someone out here,” I said.
“I’ve got this, Havoc. You can go back inside and keep an eye on the girls.”
“Don’t be a dick, Nash,” I muttered, tired of his carry on.
He abruptly stopped and I almost ran into him as he turned to face me. “I don’t know what the fuck you thought you were doing coming here tonight. And this”—he swung his arms out to the side to indi
cate he was talking about our search—“I sure as shit can look out for my women on my own. Been doing it my whole life and I’m gonna continue to do it. Especially when you screw my sister over.” He thumped his hand on his chest. “I’m the one who’s always there to pick up the fuckin’ pieces for her. And I’m warning you now, you fuck her up and I’ll fuck you up.”
I couldn’t be angry with him when I’d be saying the exact same thing if it were my sister. “If I fuck her up, come at me. Because I’ll deserve everything you do to me. Carla means something to me, Nash, and I’m gonna work hard not to screw that up.”
“She means something to you? She should mean the fuckin’ world to you, and if you can’t see that happening in the near future, you need to get the hell out of this relationship before it even gets off the ground.” His unhappiness rolled off him, even in the dark.
“I can see it happening.”
My words took him by surprise and he blinked and snapped his mouth shut.
I decided to explain myself—something I did for no one, but I felt Nash needed it if he was ever going to think about backing off from me and Carla. “You know my history with Kelly, which means you know that before she fucked me over, I gave her everything in that relationship. Anything she needed to be happy, I found a way to get her. Back then, I wasn’t the asshole I am now. I let life and the shit it threw my way sidetrack me, and I let it turn my heart cold. Getting to know Carla has changed me and opened my eyes. I want more in life again. And I want it with Carla.”
Something I said must have hit home for him. His permanent scowl disappeared. “You’ve got one shot. You screw it up, I’m not going back for seconds. Carla might, but I won’t give you that.”
I blew out a long breath and nodded. “I’ll take it.”
A rustling noise down the side of the house distracted us and Nash took off in that direction with me following close. I hoped we caught whoever it was. I figured we could both do with the opportunity to take our frustrations out on them.