by J. L. Ostle
“Why were you scared?”
“I was afraid down the line I would hurt you, that my needs may be too much for you to bare.” He means the kinky stuff.
“You mean your BDSM lifestyle?” He nods. “I told you back in London, I enjoyed what we did. I think we can see what I like and don’t like and work from there. I really do like you, Jonny, more than a friend. I want this to work, so I’m willing to be a part of your world if you let me.” I stroke his jaw and he leans into my touch,
“I just don’t want you to change.” I chuckle. “What?”
“I went from goody, goody to pretend badass to submissive. It’s funny.” I giggle.
“Well, I think you are a badass. Did you see what you did to my vase and crystal animal?” I bite my lip, maybe I did go a little too far but I was just going with the flow, I felt like I was on automatic.
“Yeah, sorry about that.” He kisses my lips softly.
“I deserved it. And besides, you are too stubborn to be a submissive, but if you are willing to try things out, I am willing to show you my world. We can discuss our limits; I know you like being whipped so that’s a good start.” I can feel his dick start to go hard again.
“You getting turned on talking about this?” I press my stomach against him and he groans into my neck.
“Seeing you naked, seeing your smooth, white, pale skin, I can imagine it all pink by my hand.” He kisses my lips again. He lowers himself and starts grinding against my entrance and my head falls back.
“Jonny,” I breathe.
“You too sore to go again?” I do feel a little sore but in a good way.
“I want you inside me. But I want you to spank me; turn my skin pink, make me feel the pain and pleasure of what you can give me. Own every inch of me,” I tell him and his eyes darken.
I watch him stand up and go to his closet and he takes out a black leather whip. He walks slowly to me and my breathing speeds up. I want him to hurt me. I want to feel what I did back in England. I want it with him.
“You trust me?” I don’t hesitate.
“Always.” I watch him lift his arm. I close my eyes, waiting for the first hit when I hear his phone ringing. I open my eyes and see he is debating on answering.
“Ignore it,” he grumbles out. I can see his erection hard and smooth. He lifts his arm again and his phone goes off again.
“Just answer it, it may be important,” I tell him. He curses as he looks for his pants and takes out his phone.
“What?” He shouts and I watch as his face turns from anger to frustration to annoyance and when his eyes go to mine, they soften. He hangs up and looks to the ground.
“I need to go, there is a problem at work.” I look at the time to see its after one in the morning.
“What? At this time?” I lay the sheet over me and crawl to the bottom of the bed. “Can’t you just deal with it in the morning? I want to continue playing.” I smile seductively at him but he doesn’t smile back.
“My dad needs me,” is all he says as he puts on fresh clothes and I just sit there and watch him. He’s gone back to Mr. Businessman again. “You can stay here if you want but I’m not sure what time I’ll back. Will you be okay?” I nod my head.
“Yeah, you go and be Mr. Boss Man. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He comes to me and kisses me hard and then takes a step back.
His eyes trail down my body and he swears one more time before leaving. I sit down and look around the room. I wasn’t expecting to be alone after what we just did but at least I know where I stand now. He wants me. That’s all that matters. I stand up and when I look down onto the bed I see evidence of my lost virginity. I take the sheets off and quickly get one of his shirts, since he ripped mine, and get back into my jeans. I quickly put on fresh sheets and take the old ones with me. I don’t want him knowing I was a virgin. I know he would react badly.
Great, another lie to add to the list. My head scolds me. I just couldn’t tell him, what we did was special and I don’t want to tarnish that.
I go to the living room and sweep up the broken pieces and put it in the trash, it’s the least I could do. I look back to his apartment and head out the door to go back to my place but as soon as I get off the elevator, Caron opens her door and squeals when she sees me.
“What happened? You jumped in that elevator so quickly I didn’t have a chance to follow. Did he apologize? That dick better have apologized. Why are you holding sheets?” She looks to me and back to the sheets. “Holy fuck balls, you slept with him?” I feel my face turn red. “Oh my God, you did. How did that happen?” I take her hand and bring her into my place. We sit down and I tell her everything from us arguing, to me threatening to sleep with other guys, to throwing things, to him kissing me, to the sex bit.
“Holy shit, you finally lost your virginity. Does he know?” I shake my head. “Oh Raven, why didn’t you tell him? Hasn’t there been enough lies between you?”
See? My head mocks again.
“I was in the moment. I was just feeling so much pleasure; and what if I tell him and he regrets it or starts ignoring me again? I couldn’t tell him. We are finally in a good place. He wants to be with me.” I smile dreamily.
“About fucking time. So where is he, has he passed out from all the exercise?” She laughs.
“Unfortunately not, he got a phone call from his dad and he needed to head back to work.”
“No wonder why he looked like shit if he is going in and out at silly times of the day. His father really is a slave driver. At least he’ll be the boss soon and will have more time for you.”
“Yeah, I can’t wait to see him again. I feel like a teenager, I just want to text him and call him. I won’t, but I just can’t wait to be around him again.” I squeal and Caron joins me.
“Aww, well if you ever get married, remember I am maid of honor.” I roll my eyes.
“As long as I’m yours whenever you get married.”
“Who am I going to marry? At least you have a guy.”
“What about Alan?” I tease and I see her face blush. Well, that is interesting. We talk some more and she stays over and we fall asleep watching Father of the Bride. I fall asleep with a big smile on my face.
This is what it’s like to feel actual happiness.
Jonny
“Yeah, you go and be Mr. Boss Man, I’ll see you tomorrow.” I go to her and kiss her hard, wanting so badly to stay with her, to be inside her again.
I take a step back and seeing the sheet fall down to around her waist, seeing her perky breasts waiting for me to bite and suck. Why didn’t I taste them when I had a chance? I swear under my breath and walk away from her. I can feel her eyes on me as I walk away but I don’t look back. If I do, I probably wouldn’t leave her.
I head to the elevator and I swear I can smell her all over me. On the ride down, all I think about is how much of a dumbass I have been. I have been torturing myself the last four days, avoiding her because I was too much of a pussy to tell her how I felt. I could have been fucking her, making love to her; only if I had grown a set of balls.
Peter gives me a nod as I walk past him, and I call for a cab. I’m too worked up to drive and I need to sort this shit out. I head to the office and go to my father’s floor and see a light on. I walk in and my mouth drops open when I see the person standing in there.
“What are you doing here?” I ask her sternly. She turns and gives me a sultry smile.
“Hello to you, too, Mr. Stone. Thought we were past formalities.” She walks to me and kisses my cheek. “Didn’t your father tell you that we are meeting? I just flew in and wanted to get started. He seemed keen to please me, like you used to not that long ago.” I watch her walk to the window and look out. She still looks the same; long, light brown hair, green eyes, and curvaceous body.
“Cheryl, you shouldn’t have spoken to my father, he doesn’t know what shit went down with our families.” I walk to the front of the desk and take a seat. This is what I have been
working my ass off for? To work alongside Cheryl for the next couple of months?
“He still doesn’t know?” I shake my head. I watch her as she walks to me and sits on the desk in front of me; her skirt rides up her thighs, but I look away.
“We could have met in the morning.”
“What would the fun be in that?” Her words startle me, it’s the same words Raven uses on me all the time. I stand up and her eyes follow my movement.
“I need to go, make an appointment during business hours.” She looks at me sternly and pushes me back down in my seat and straddles me.
“I am not that silly girl you once knew. If I want something, I usually get it. Haven’t you missed me Jonathan? Missed the games we use to play?” She licks her lips as her hands slide down my body. I grab her wrists and she smiles at me. “I like how hard you use to take things. Do you still play?” I set her off my lap and stand from my chair. I walk away from her and lean against the window wall.
“I’m not that same boy either, Cheryl.”
“I’ve noticed, you’re definitely all man now.” She walks towards me. “Remember how I begged for more; the whip in your hands, seeing my skin burn red for you? I miss you, Jonathan.” Her body pushes against mine. “You just had sex.” She abruptly changes the subject. I walk past her and take a few steps away from her.
“That is none of your business,” I grit out.
“You like her. Does she know the games you play, how hard you like to play?”
“She knows my lifestyle.”
“I asked if she knows how extreme you like to go; do you think she can please you as much as I did? Can she take what you give?” I walk to the door, not wanting to listen anymore. “I know who she is Jonathan and, trust me, she may like a spank here and there but in the end, you will scare her, she won’t handle it. You may stay with her anyway but you will want more. You will want to stay in the shadows with me, away from naive people. You know I’m right, I know you want to feel that power, I can feel it radiating off you.” I turn my head and look at her and she just smiles sweetly in return.
Raven
Jonny has been busy for the last couple of days but he has called and texted to tell me how much he misses me and can’t wait to get things sorted at work. I hate that I haven’t seen him since we slept together but I know he needs to concentrate on work.
Caron has stayed at my place and we have been watching movies, pampering ourselves, and just hanging out. We talked a little about Jonny but since she knows I’m missing him, she tries not to bring him up. I want to ask about Alan since she blushes every time I mention his name, but I don’t push her; she’ll tell me when she’s ready.
I get a message from Jonny telling me he is doing another late night and apologizing for not seeing me again. I sigh and slump down on the couch, feeling gutted that I won’t see him again. I’m half tempted to go visit him so I can see him and maybe get in a little office sex.
“He’s working again?” Caron asks as she sits upside down on the couch.
“You know, blood flows to the brain when you sit like that,” I tell her. She shrugs.
“I’m stretching out my back, saw on Facebook that this does that.” I chuckle.
“You shouldn’t believe everything that is said on Facebook. I think I’m going to go dance for a little while. Let some of this tension go.” I stand back up.
“To relieve some sexual tension.” I throw a pillow at her, we both laugh. “Want me to come with?”
“No, it’s okay, you have fun stretching.” I go to my room and get dressed, and when I head back out, she’s still in the same position. “You enjoy yourself.” I grab my bag and keys.
“I will, you have fun dancing!” she shouts out.
I decide to walk today and enjoy the fresh air. I send a text to Jonny telling him that I miss him and I frown when he doesn’t reply back. His work sucks big time; they are sucking all his time up. I’m looking forward to when he gets some actual time off. I was even thinking about asking him to take me to another BDSM club. I know he’s a member of one around here.
I get to the dance studio and see some classes are taking place. I see a little girl looking into one and I crouch down next to her. She has her hair tied up in a bun and is wearing a pink leotard with a tutu.
“You okay?” I ask her and she just nods. “You going to do some dancing today?” She shrugs. I watch as she looks at some of the girls in the room who are giggling to one another. “Are they your friends?” She shakes her head.
“They don’t really like me; I think they think I’m a bad dancer or something.” I see the girl look down. I lift her chin so she is looking at me.
“You are not a bad dancer; we all start from somewhere. I was terrible when I first started and now a dance academy asked me to join their team. If that can happen to me, then it could happen to you.” I give her a smile.
“You belong to a dance academy?”
“No, I turned them down, I’m happy here. But you will get better. Do you want to come in with me?” She looks into the room and back at me and nods. I take her hand and lead her in.
“Hi Raven, how are you?” Sarah, the dance teacher asks me. We have talked in passing and she watches me dance sometimes.
“I’m good, I’m here to dance alongside my new friend.” I pause, hating that I didn't even ask the girls name.
“Rebecca, nice to see you again.” Thank God. I know her name now.
“Raven, why don’t you show some of these girls what you can do.”
“Sure.”
“Class, we have a professional dancer here to show us some moves, so let’s be good and watch,” Sarah calls out. I feel like rolling my eyes; I’m not really a professional.
“Rebecca, can you wait at the side for me?” She nods. I watch all the girls in the room stand near the mirror. I step in the middle of the room and get in a starting pose and I try to imagine a song in my head. I start to move, letting my body flow with the imaginary beat. I glide across the floor, moving with grace and end with a parawet. The whole room claps.
“Perfect as always.” Sarah claps and gives me a hug. All the girls look at me like I’m a celebrity. I see the girls Rebecca were looking at and they are pointing at me. I walk back to Rebecca and her mouth is wide open.
“You were so good, like beyond good.” I chuckle at her.
“Thanks, if this is what you want to do, don’t let people stop you. I had three girls growing up trying to damage my spirit, don’t let that happen to you. Dance lets you be free so just let your body flow with the rhythm. Let the music guide you.” She nods her head.
“Hi.” I turn around and see the girls smiling at me. I stand up and put my hand on Rebecca’s shoulder. I notice they see what I did. “You were brilliant. I am going to be a ballerina when I’m older,” she says.
“Well, I hope you are, dance is a beautiful thing.”
“I totally agree,” another girl says.
“Well, it helps that I have my friend Rebecca to train with, she helps me with some of my ideas, making my dance routines more fun and unique.” All the girls look at Rebecca in a new light.
“Wow, really?” I nod.
“She is good; she just needs a confidence boost. Do you think you girls could do that for me? She can be a little shy.” They all nod frantically and crowd her.
“We are going to be best friends, I can tell.” They all start talking over one another and Rebecca smiles at me and back to them, I give her a wink and walk away.
“You did a good thing, you know. Rebecca comes from a poor family. She won a competition for some free classes but she hasn’t really taken part, just watched,” Sarah says and we both turn back to her and she is laughing and talking away.
“Can I ask a favor?”
“Sure.”
“Can you tell her and her family her classes are now free? I will pay for her future classes, just put it in my invoice.” I look back at Rebecca and feel happy that I did s
omething good.
“I will, but don’t you want to say it was you?” I shake my head.
“No, I’d rather her think her luck has come in. Keep up with the teaching, you may be teaching one of the greats.” I give her a wave and head to an empty room and dance to some upbeat songs.
Raven
I danced for a couple of hours and I even let Rebecca and her new friends watch me before their parents came to pick them up, and when I saw Sarah tell Rebecca’s parents about the free classes, Rebecca’s mother was so happy.
I grab takeaway on the way home and I’m even willing to share it with Caron. I hope she has moved from my couch. I notice Peter isn’t at his usual post but he probably went to the bathroom or something. I head straight up to my apartment and open the door and I almost drop my bag when I see who is sitting on my couch.
“Sweetie, it’s so good to see you.” My mother stands up and tries to give me a hug but I walk around her to my kitchen and dump my bag on the counter. I walk back out and she is still standing there.
“What are you doing here, Mom?” I cross my arms.
“You haven’t returned my calls or messages. That man who answered your phone, he wasn’t very pleasant.”
“That man didn’t like the fact that you weren’t a mother to me when it meant the most. You made your choice when you didn’t believe me, now please leave.” I point to the door.
“Honey, you need to stop lying about this. We are willing to let this go, even Zachery.” My body freezes when I hear that name.
“Don’t you dare say that name to me. That man is dead to me. Leave.” She walks to me and places her hands on my shoulders and I shrug her off and walk away from her.
“You and I both know all the things you said weren’t true, you need to stop playing such a game.” I feel anger build up inside me.
“A game? A fucking game? Is RAPE a game to you? You knew that I was a good girl, I always did the right thing, I did what I was told and yet you still don’t believe me. You are supposed to be my fucking mother!” I scream at her.