Thirteen Hours

by Meghan O'Brien

  The truth was, she craved a real relationship with all the trimmings.

  She wanted the romance, the urgent desire, as well as the comfort of the unconditional friendship she imagined the right woman had to offer.

  If there was any chance that Dana was the woman of her dreams, she couldn’t afford to let her go.

  “Tonight’s a test,” she said. “We’ll go out to dinner, talk, and see what this feels like in the real world, without letting sex confuse the issue. If, after this date, I still feel like I’m drowning every time I think about her, well—” She exhaled. “Then I guess I’m just going to have to suck it up and let myself fall in love.”

  With that, she stood up and walked back to her closet. It was a good plan. Sticking to it would be the hard part. Images of all the ways they had made each other come kept flashing through her brain, and she worried that the mere sight of Dana would make her lose control.

  At the bottom of her underwear drawer, she found the rattiest pair of panties she owned. Baggy and with an unflattering cut, they were reserved for days when she felt bloated or when she let the laundry go far too long. Laurel slipped out of her jeans, tugged off the silky blue panties she felt sure Dana would love, and replaced them with the granny panties. She checked herself in the mirror, grinning in satisfaction at the hole in the fabric over her left hip.

  “Just a little insurance,” Laurel told Isis. “There’s no way I would ever let Dana see me in these.”

  ———

  By the time they were halfway through dinner, Laurel wasn’t nearly as certain that Operation Granny Panties was going to work.

  From the moment she’d opened her apartment door to find Dana holding a bouquet of purple irises to right now, watching her chase around a lost mushroom in their fondue pot of coq au vin, her willpower had been constantly undermined. With every word, every look, and every funny, sweet moment, she could see why she was so damn attracted to Dana in the first place.

  It wasn’t just her thick auburn hair, her porcelain skin, or even the supple curves that made Laurel’s mouth water. It was a thousand intangible things, from her wicked sense of humor to the way she rushed ahead to open doors for her. Laurel was a sucker for the freckles sprinkled across her face, the keen intelligence in her eyes, and the way Dana hung on every word she said. Laurel felt the same desire, wanting nothing more than to keep talking with her forever.

  Chewing a bite of ravioli, Dana lifted her gaze and gave her a shy smile. She was wearing a deep green blouse that showed off the barest hint of cleavage, a fashion choice that Laurel knew had taken a great deal of courage. Try as she might, she couldn’t keep her eyes off Dana’s chest, imagining what lay beneath the sleek fabric. She flashed on Dana in a lacy black bra and felt her heart rate increase.

  Maybe she could endure the humiliation of letting Dana see her ugly, oversized panties, after all.

  “Laurel?”

  Laurel tore her eyes away from Dana’s breasts, dragging her gaze up to the full lips that repeated her name. “Yes? Sorry.”

  “Like what you see?”

  Laurel grinned. “Busted.” She used her fondue fork to spear a piece of chicken. “I told myself I was going to be good, but…you’re looking gorgeous tonight.”

  “Thanks,” Dana whispered, and glanced down at the table shyly.

  “It might be a bit late to try and preserve my virtue, though.”

  “That’s an understatement,” Laurel murmured.

  Their eyes met and Laurel knew instinctively that they were both remembering the passion they had shared the last time they were together. She tried to rein in her hormones.

  “I want tonight to be about something other than sex,” she said.

  “So I promised myself I’d be good.”

  Dana looked mildly perplexed. She settled back into her seat, as though preparing for a serious conversation. “Any particular reason? I mean, beyond not wanting to scandalize everyone in the restaurant?”

  Laurel hesitated, unsure how to explain her logic out loud. She knew this conversation would have to happen, but now that the moment had come, she wasn’t sure she was strong enough to resist temptation.

  Did the no-sex decision even make any sense? They’d already had sex, for hours on end, so what would one more night hurt? Immediately she shook the thought off, remembering that she needed to be strong no matter how difficult it might be. She was more experienced than Dana.

  It was up to her to show some common sense or they could both have regrets.

  “I want you so badly I can hardly see straight,” she said quietly.

  “It’s like I can’t think about anything else, and that’s…not good.”

  “It’s not?” Dana asked, with an expression somewhere between flattered and crestfallen. “What’s not good about wanting me?”

  Laurel opened her mouth to respond, but found that she didn’t know how to say this without risking Dana’s feelings. She searched for the right words, then finally admitted, “You make me want to throw caution to the wind.”

  “I thought that was your motto.” Dana took a drink. Rather than seeming upset by Laurel’s show of honesty, she almost appeared to relax. “Throw caution to the wind, live bravely.”

  “Yes. Well.” Laurel paused to gather her thoughts. She had never been so tentative with a woman before. But had she ever felt this strongly? Dana was her opposite in so many ways, and yet there was something about her reserved, controlled exterior that drove Laurel wild.

  “I’ve been a little nervous, too,” Dana said casually, biting a piece of pasta off her fork. “I had just about written the weekend off as a onetime thing when you called.”

  Laurel blinked rapidly. It was one thing to try and put the brakes on her own feelings, but hearing that Dana had done the same made her a little uneasy. “Would you have called me if I didn’t call you?”

  “Uh…” Dana looked down at the table, avoiding her gaze. “I don’t know. Maybe. Probably. After a while.”

  “I think it’s good we’re talking about this. It sounds like we’ve both had a lot on our minds.”

  Dana met her eyes. “I’m really happy to see you again.”

  “Me, too.” Laurel reached across the table and took Dana’s hand.

  The idea that Dana might never have called made her chest ache with an almost unbearable sadness. It felt a lot like a preview of the heartbreak this relationship could cause if it didn’t work out. Struggling with how to explain what she was feeling, she hedged, “I really, really like you.”

  Something about the tone of Laurel’s voice must have sounded ominous, because Dana’s eyes filled, and her face took on a look of pure sorrow. “Wait. Are you…is this…?”

  She thought she was being dumped, Laurel realized. And the last thing Laurel wanted was for this to end tonight. Dread seized her throat and she shook her head wildly, giving Dana’s hand a squeeze. “No. I’m just trying to explain what’s going on with me.”

  “Don’t scare me like that,” Dana said, and slid her hand up to Laurel’s wrist. “God, you just scared the hell out of me.”

  “Really?” Laurel found Dana’s reaction almost comforting. Was it possible she felt just as strongly as Laurel did?

  “Really,” Dana said. “Last weekend was magical. The thought of never experiencing that again is too much to bear.”

  “I know,” Laurel said. “I feel the same way.”

  “I’ll admit, I wasn’t sure if we really intended to try and keep this going.” Dana stroked her finger across Laurel’s wrist, sending a shiver of pleasure straight between her legs. “We both talked about needing this experience to be more than just a crazy one-time thing, but it was easy to say that in a bubble.”

  “You’re right,” Laurel said again. “I meant it, though.”

  Dana gave her wrist a gentle squeeze. “So did I. I just hope you’re not disappointed once you get to know me better.”

  “That’s one reason I told myself I wasn’t g
oing to sleep with you tonight,” Laurel said. She wanted Dana to understand that there was a rationale behind her self-discipline. “I thought it would be good for us to make sure that this is more than just a sexual thing.”

  “It’s more than just a sexual thing.” Dana’s words were sincere, and her eyes burned with an intensity that Laurel had never seen before.

  “To me, at least.”

  “For me, too,” Laurel murmured. She didn’t need to finish their date to know that. Everything about Dana made her feel breathless, and alive. Being able to admit her fears, and having Dana address them directly, was exactly what she needed. “Getting ready tonight, I realized that you’re going to have the power to really break my heart. When I commit to something, I put everything I have into it. That includes relationships.”

  Dana swallowed visibly. “I’ve never been in a relationship before.”

  “I know, and I’m so sorry to dump all this on you. But like I said, I really like you. Pretty presumptuous for a first date, right?”

  “I think the elevator was our first date, technically. Maybe even our first three.” Dana’s eyes crinkled a bit at the corners when she smiled. The teasing quality it lent to her face was utterly charming.

  “And I don’t think it’s presumptuous to assume that this could turn into a relationship.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Don’t get me wrong, the sex is incredible.” Dana’s gaze was full of desire, and Laurel felt herself drawn in. “But that’s not nearly all that I want from you. I have to admit, it makes me feel so much better, seeing this side of you.”

  Laurel felt a surge of emotional release, a lifting of the burden of second-guessing where both of them stood. “Yeah?”

  “I feel like it puts us on equal ground,” Dana said. “We’re both scared to death, and excited as hell. You’re feeling just as vulnerable as I am.” She took Laurel’s hand again and raised it to her lips to kiss the knuckles. “I’m not the only one risking my feelings on this.”

  “No, you’re not.”

  “Thank you for telling me what you’ve been thinking. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make you feel comfortable.”

  “Even if that means not sleeping together tonight?”

  “Of course.” Dana’s shrug wasn’t entirely convincing. “You’re the nymphomaniac, remember?”

  Laughing, Laurel recalled the times she’d almost fallen asleep in Dana’s bed during the weekend, only to be woken by a desperate hand on her thigh, or a tongue sliding across her sweat-slicked skin. “As a matter of fact, that’s not what I recall.” She raised an eyebrow and stared pointedly at Dana, trying to communicate what she was thinking about.

  Dana blushed, folding up her napkin and setting it on the table.

  “Granted, I hope this won’t be a long moratorium on sex.”

  “It won’t.” Laurel took Dana’s hand again, enjoying the warm softness of her skin. “Trust me, I’ll be lucky to make it through tonight.”

  ———

  Later in bed, Laurel was sure she was the stupidest person alive.

  Dana could be next to her right now, on top of her, inside her. But after a heated, groping kiss at her apartment door, Laurel had watched her walk away, against every instinct she possessed. All because she needed to prove to herself that she could.

  And what revelation had this plunge into abstinence brought her?

  That she wanted Dana and she would be damned if she didn’t see this through. Even if there was a chance of heartache, she would never forgive herself if she didn’t even try. Every moment she’d spent with Dana was so much better than the ones that made up every day. Yes, it was scary to imagine getting involved, but she was already invested.

  Walking away now wouldn’t prevent heartache, it would just guarantee it.

  Laurel shifted onto her back, closing her eyes at the way the sheets caressed her oversensitized flesh. She was naked, as she always was when she went to bed, but she was starting to debate putting a T-shirt on, if only to give her hormones a break. Staring across the table at Dana all night, then having just a taste of her during their makeout session at her door, left her wet and ready and entirely unable to sleep.

  “Fuck,” Laurel whispered, and turned onto her side. She slipped a hand between her thighs and exhaled slowly. Maybe she could ease her own suffering and find some relief. “I’m an idiot sometimes.”

  From somewhere in the dark bedroom, Isis chirped out a quiet meow.

  Laurel began to laugh, aware of how pathetic she was at that moment. She rolled onto her stomach, lifting her hips slightly, and closed her eyes. Imagining Dana kneeling behind her, she slid a hand under her stomach, then between her legs. She stroked herself gently, exhaling at the wetness that coated her swollen labia.

  “Dana,” she whispered, keeping alive the fantasy that her lover was watching her touch herself. The idea of letting Dana see her like this unleashed a fresh flood of hot wetness, and she swirled around her opening for a moment before pushing inside.

  Ding.

  Laurel jumped at the noise from her laptop, which sat on her nightstand. That was her e-mail alert noise, and she had left the volume up specifically because she’d given Dana her e-mail address at dinner.

  She glanced at the glowing red numbers on her alarm clock and rolled onto her side again. It was almost one in the morning. Would Dana really still be awake?

  Laurel knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep unless she checked.

  She grabbed her laptop, bringing up the display with a swipe of her finger across the touch pad. Her heart started thumping when she saw the sender’s name on her lone unread e-mail.

  Dana Watts. The subject of the e-mail read Is this as hard for you?

  Taking a steadying breath, Laurel clicked on the message.

  Laurel, Please tell me that falling asleep after a kiss like that is just as difficult for you as it is for me. Every time I close my eyes, I remember how you looked the last time I was inside you. I need to see you tomorrow, and this time, I’m not letting you go to bed alone.

  Dana

  TOMORROW

  I think we should wait,” Laurel said. Her eyes glinted as they moved from Dana’s mouth to her breast. But she sounded very serious.

  “I don’t think so,” Dana said. Dinner had been eaten, they were finally back at Laurel’s apartment, and Dana wasn’t sure she could wait any longer to touch her again. “Did you forget? I’m not letting you go to bed alone.”

  “Really?” Laurel dragged her gaze along the length of Dana’s body, stopping to linger on her thighs.

  “I’ve never been so serious about anything,” Dana said, distracted by the naked lust on Laurel’s face. “Ever.”

  “Trust me, it’s not that I don’t…appreciate your position.” Laurel stared hard at Dana’s lap, then casually drew her tongue across her lower lip. If she was trying to drive Dana crazy, she was doing one hell of a job.

  “I have a lot of positions you can appreciate,” Dana said.

  Overwhelmed by the intense arousal she was feeling, she couldn’t help but fall back on humor. “Remember?”

  Laurel shifted imperceptibly closer on the couch, gazing at her with heavy-lidded eyes. “I’m just not sure if it’s a good idea,” she drawled, then lowered her gaze to her fingers, apparently distracted by a hangnail. “Sleeping together so soon.”

  Dana exhaled slowly, trying to calm her racing heart. She had never been so physically attracted to someone in her life, and Laurel was oozing sex tonight. Her rich chestnut hair fell in waves just past her shoulders, and her olive skin begged to be caressed. She wore a form-fitting T-shirt that clung to her breasts like a lover and showed off the lean definition of her arms. She smelled lovely, in a way that was uniquely Laurel.

  It was painful to be so close to her and not touch.

  “Why wouldn’t sleeping together be a good idea?” Dana asked.

  After a moment of hesitation, she reached out and took Laurel’s ha
nd.

  She tried to keep the contact as chaste as possible, even as her fingers burned to grab Laurel’s shoulder and haul her over for a long, hard kiss.

  “I thought it went well last time.”

  Laurel laughed, showing off her gorgeous white smile. Dana swallowed past the lump in her throat, remembering the delicious scrape of those teeth on her breasts. Her nipples tightened to the point of mild pain, and she had to tear her gaze away from Laurel’s mouth.

  “You’re right,” Laurel murmured, sending a shiver through Dana’s body. “It went very well.”

  The words dripped with seduction, but Laurel made no move to close the distance between them. Dana sought her eyes, trying to decide if Laurel was really saying no. Her words didn’t match her actions, and Dana found herself uncertain about how to react. She wanted nothing more than to push Laurel down onto the couch, wrench her T-shirt up over her breasts, and take a nipple in her mouth while sliding her hand into the low-cut jeans Laurel wore so well. She snapped back to attention at Laurel’s next words.

  “I’m just not sure it’s the best move. You know, letting ourselves get swept away by our hormones so early in our relationship.” As she spoke, she traced a fingernail along Dana’s wrist, raising goose bumps in her wake.

  Shuddering from the white-hot desire that lanced through her, Dana choked out, “Oh, really?”

  With a sincere nod, Laurel tickled a path up the inside of Dana’s arm. “I just don’t want us to make a mistake.”

  Laurel’s eyes were the color of the deep, tempestuous sea, and they flashed with unmistakable need. Her chest rose and fell quickly, even as her voice remained steady. The protests she raised didn’t agree with what her body was telling Dana. And that was all Dana needed to know.

  Emboldened, she decided to test the waters. “Maybe you’re right.”

  She leaned slightly away. “I don’t want to move you too fast.”

  Laurel’s face betrayed nothing, but she smoothed a trembling hand over her hair and glanced away. “Thank you.”

  “The last thing I want to do is make you uncomfortable.”

  Laurel exhaled, giving her a tight nod. She smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes.