by Allie Ritch
He knew the feeling. Ever since he’d met her, he felt like someone had tagged him right between the eyes with a laser blast.
“Everything will be fine,” he told her, wishing he could think of something more romantic to say. Maybe they should have watched that sappy movie about the poet after all. “Just let me hold you.”
She buried her head against his shoulder and stayed put.
It took several minutes or more before she finally seemed to calm down. Whitt wasn’t quite sure since he drifted off a bit.
When she did stop trembling, she made a muffled noise and pushed herself up into a sitting position. “I’d better go. I need to get home and change, and I have work tomorrow.”
The level of disappointment he felt over this pronouncement was as absurd as it was unexpected. He tried not to let it show.
“I’ll walk you home.”
“Stay and relax.” Leaning forward, she planted a quick kiss on his forehead. “It’s not that far. Besides, I have my new little friend to keep me company.”
She glanced at the bear he’d given her before getting up to dress.
Whitt’s train of thought temporarily derailed while he watched her cover up her naked body. Then he managed to focus again.
“Want to do dinner tomorrow night? I could bring something over to your place.”
She nibbled on her lower lip and cuddled her new toy against her chest. “You know I’d love to see you, but I’m not sure tomorrow is a good idea. I’m modeling for class Tuesday night, and I’d like to wait to get together after that.”
Although he didn’t follow her reasoning, he didn’t want to be one of those clingy losers who begged for his girlfriend’s every free second.
He shrugged. “Fine by me. Do you know where we’re heading after class this week?”
“Katra’Ruma left me a message that she’s picked out a restaurant a few blocks down.” She sounded amused. “Apparently she wants to try their soup again so she can figure out what they put in it. The chef refuses to share his recipe.”
“She cooks?” Somehow Whitt had never pictured their classmate as the domestic type.
Now it was Spri’s turn to shrug. “It should be interesting to see her and Krux now that they’re an item. I wonder if they’ll still bait each other as much.”
Somehow he doubted they would, at least to the same degree. After all, sexual relief did wonders for one’s mood.
Chapter Twelve
Commitment Issues
All day Monday at work, Spri thought about Whitt and what had almost happened between them. Part of her was relieved she’d stopped him from coming fully inside her. After all, she didn’t want him accusing her of tricking him into a bonding, and she wasn’t convinced he was ready for that kind of commitment. Another part of her—that precious piece that couldn’t stop smiling and basking in the glow of new love—wished they’d finished what they’d started. What they had together was so special maybe he’d want to play for keeps.
She’d find out for sure at tomorrow night’s class. After he learned about Litting sexuality, he’d understand exactly how serious that last step was. Spri hoped it didn’t scare him off.
When she got home, she immediately picked up the little bear he’d given her, whom she’d appropriately named Blue. Her heart warmed every time she looked at it and pictured Whitt buying it for her in the store. The adorable creature stretched as it woke up from its nap.
“You’re home!” Blue cheered right away. “Can we play now?”
“What do you want to play?” she asked, wondering how much the toy was programmed to do.
“How about hide-and-seek?”
That made her smile, but she did want to at least give Whitt a call tonight. Her exit last night had been kind of abrupt.
“I’d love to,” she agreed, “but why don’t we call Whitt first?”
The bear nodded enthusiastically. “I like Whitt. Whitt took me home so I could be adopted by someone extra special.”
“Then let’s go tell him thanks.”
Plopping in front of her living room vid screen, she settled the bear so he was sitting on her lap. Everything remained dark for several seconds after she logged in Whitt’s code, but then his handsome face filled the screen. His eyes widened in surprise.
“Changed your mind?” he asked hopefully.
Spri shook her head. “I’ll see you tomorrow night. I just wanted to call and say thank you. It was a wonderful weekend, and I love my new present.”
“Thank you, Whitt.” Blue clapped his bitty paws excitedly. “I love my new home. Spri let me sleep in her bed.”
“Lucky guy.” Whitt responded with a rueful smile.
“A girl has to sleep sometime,” she teased him, but she quickly sobered. “I hope you’ll understand better after class tomorrow. We’ve got a good thing going, and I don’t want to ruin it.”
Although she could tell he wanted to debate the issue, he just shrugged. “As long as you don’t plan on modeling with anybody else tomorrow. I don’t think my heart could take it.”
“No worries there. It’ll just be me.” But she was pleased by his remark. Then, knowing the way he thought, she added, “You’ll get to ogle me naked again.”
His grin was so wide his lips should have split. “Sure you don’t want to get in some practice?”
It was a good try, but she declined.
They chatted a few more minutes before disconnecting.
“So hide-and-seek, huh?” She petted her little bear. “You can go hide first.”
Blue jumped happily to his feet. “I love you, Spri.” He hugged her belly before he scurried off to hide.
If only a certain blue-haired Allurian would tell her the same thing.
* * * *
As he took his seat in class, Whitt didn’t know what great revelation Spri thought she’d make tonight. He didn’t think much could surprise him. After all, he’d already explored every inch of her body. He knew how she was built, how she liked to be touched, and just how fast she could climax when he pushed her to it. Since he’d at least gotten his head in the door, so to speak, he also knew her channel was as smooth and soft as a New Earthling female’s, so he doubted there were any surprises hiding up there. What was holding her back?
He’d been asking himself that for a long time now. Last night, after he’d talked to her, Whitt had even come up with a possible answer. What if her culture didn’t believe in contraception? That certainly would explain why she didn’t want to go all the way without a big commitment and everything. Since they’d never discussed the matter, he hadn’t told her he was on birth control. She might have been worried. In fact, that might have been what had scared her off so fast the other night. He’d ejaculated inside her with the tip of his penis lodged between her legs, which would have been more than enough to get her pregnant if he hadn’t been protected. The first opportunity he got, he’d have to reassure her on that score.
There was no chance to talk to her now. Garbed in nothing but a thin robe, she was already standing at the front of the classroom talking with their instructors. Most of the other students had filed in, including Trett, who’d switched from full enrollment to being a freelance student since hooking up with his Oquaran girlfriend, Mera. Apparently Mera was busy tonight with some kind of seasonal job. After the first class—before he’d started dating Spri, of course—Whitt had made a pass at Mera. And been totally shot down. Man, these females were hard on a guy’s ego.
“No drooling over the model.” Katra’Ruma gave him a teasing look as she and Krux sat beside him.
His lips twitched. “Why not? You two aren’t even modeling tonight, and you’re hanging all over each other.”
“Just pray the object of your affections hasn’t chosen to do an intercourse demo with another man,” Krux needled him.
It was all Whitt could do not to drop his gaze. His cheeks felt a touch warm. Bad, bad idea to sleep with Katra’Ruma. He’d regretted it ever since.
“Stop tormenting him,” the lady in question snapped.
Krux looked like he might argue, but just then their instructors called everyone to attention.
Xindra took the lead. “Tonight’s topic is Litting sexuality and the cultural significance of the body, nudity, and lovemaking in their culture. Spri has graciously agreed to model for us and share her personal take on her race’s views.”
Knowing what was about to come, Whitt tried to brace himself, but it didn’t do any good. His cock turned as hard as diamond the second Spri dropped her robe. He even had to spread his legs and adjust his pants to make more room.
“Littings are unique in that they’re one of the few races that do not have significant sexual dimorphism. Both the males and females reach approximately the same height, although muscle and fat is obviously distributed very differently in men versus women. Looking strictly at the reproductive anatomy, both internal and external, Litting females are nearly identical to New Earthling women, whom we covered in the first class.”
Flicking on the medical scanner, they broadcast Spri’s insides onscreen while they went over all the scientific names for her fun parts. When they were done with the internal viewing, Spri sat up on the demonstration table and parted her legs so that everyone could see she was, in fact, formed like most of the other female models they’d already seen.
Except she wasn’t just another model, and the sight of her spread like that had Whitt worrying he’d stain the front of his pants. Thankfully, no one was invited to touch her. He might have turned violent if they had.
Benni, their Flexian student, broke in. “Littings seem to stick to themselves most of the time. Does your race ever mingle romantically with outsiders?”
“We do.” Spri answered with a smile and sent Whitt a special look. “However, it’s relatively rare because our beliefs about sexuality and intercourse are often very different from the attitudes held by the other races.”
“How?” Pixie asked.
Spri answered thoughtfully. “For instance, my appearing naked before you has deep meaning to a Litting. In this case, I’m acting as a mentor, educating others about my sex. Depending on the denomination or sect, nudity is also used in some religious ceremonies—what we call going starclad. Otherwise, a Litting doesn’t share their body with anyone but their lover or, in medical situations, their doctor.
“Talking about sex is given a similar weight. If it’s done in a respectful manner—to educate, to improve, to share, or to seek advice—then it’s acceptable. Otherwise, the subject is considered extremely private. No Litting, male or female, would ever brag about sex or share intimate details for the sake of vanity or to be hurtful. Certainly, none would record a sex act or perform in front of others.”
Although he hadn’t gotten all the details, Whitt had already heard most of this from Spri before. Judging by the other students’ expressions, though, they were taken aback.
“So you’re only willing to talk about this now because this is educational?” Varion asked.
Spri nodded. “I’m actually one of the more progressive Littings, too. My mother is a doctor, so I grew up with a more…physical orientation than most of my race. However, I still uphold the belief that sexual intercourse isn’t just an act of the body. For a Litting, mind and spirit are equally, if not more heavily, involved.”
“How’s that?” Usually Glynn wore a somber expression, but he looked genuinely curious now.
It was Xindra who spoke this time. “Have you heard the saying the mind is the most powerful erogenous zone?”
Everyone nodded.
“Well, for Littings, this is true to a degree none of the other races even come close to. They have developed an intense, but very limited form of telepathy that comes into play during coitus.”
Whitt felt like someone had just slapped him stupid. Huh? Telepathy? He had to have heard that wrong.
“The scientific data on this telepathy is sparse.” Quinn repeated that unlikely word. “What we do know comes from Litting doctors trying to cure sexual dysfunction on a physical level. Right now, the leading hypothesis is that a special hormone—unique to Littings—is released in both the male and female at the exact moment the male’s penis fully penetrates the female’s vagina. This hormone appears to have extreme neurological effects, most notably the production of a psychic link between the partners.”
“This was all the information we could uncover about this phenomenon,” Xindra explained. “Spri, we’re hoping you’ll share more.”
Whitt’s eyes stung from lack of blinking, but he couldn’t look away from his girlfriend. It suddenly ceased to matter that she was totally naked. Which was quite a feat.
She nibbled her lip and refused to meet his gaze as she answered. “It’s not something we have voluntary control over. As soon as we fully join our bodies, we experience a sort of pulling sensation, as if we’re tumbling into the other person. The next thing we know, we’re experiencing all the thoughts and feelings and sensations our partner does. It’s not just telepathy, you see, but an empathic bridge as well.
“Although we touch and thrust and orgasm just like most of the other races, the greatest stimulation comes through the psychic connection. We get to experience sex as both a male and female simultaneously. We can wrap ourselves in our partner’s desire and love. Using that same connection, we can also caress one another with no more than a thought—make it feel like tongues are licking our lover all over or like we have extra hands stroking them.”
“Extra hands come in handy.” Krux, their four-armed Brachoi, sounded boastful.
The other students snickered.
Whitt sat so still and silent he hardly breathed.
*
Krux’s silly joke should have relieved the tension, but Spri felt almost giddy as she kept talking. Although she was hyperaware of Whitt sitting there, watching her, she couldn’t bring herself to meet his gaze until she finished getting this out.
“Sex for us Littings means opening ourselves completely,” she added, hoping she made sense. “It’s an act of ultimate trust, a touching of souls. That’s why we hold it so sacred. You can’t experience something like that and then break up a few weeks later because you find out you’re not compatible. We don’t work like that. The first time we make love, we form a spiritual bond that is extremely hard to sever by either party. Because of this, it’s rare for a Litting to take more than one lover in their lifetime.”
“What happens in a mixed-race relationship?” Varion sounded intrigued. “Does the whole telepathic thing still happen? Do both partners experience it, or just the Litting?”
“I’ve never talked to anyone directly about it,” she admitted, wondering why she’d avoided it. “From what I understand, the psychic connection really does work like a bridge—one that functions both ways whether the partner is Litting or not. While my race regards this as a beautiful sharing, though, I gather non-Litting partners can sometimes find it…intrusive. And they don’t always understand the commitment they’re making to begin with.”
“To have sex is to mate for life.” Zeo, their Nimanian student, delivered the observation. By the tone of his voice, she could tell he really understood.
She nodded once. “That’s it exactly.”
Drawing on her courage, she finally dared to glance at the only listener who mattered to her—the one she’d been worried about. Whitt’s eyes were wide, and he looked like he’d been frozen in place. Although Spri had told herself she could deal with his reaction, the expression of horror on his face broke her heart.
*
Whitt didn’t wait for the class to officially end. The moment he tore his gaze from hers, he got up and headed for the door. He didn’t even pause to see if she’d run after him. Gods, he needed to get out of here.
How could she do this to him? Why hadn’t she warned him? When he thought of how close he’d come to… And to think he could have found himself at an assault-gun wedding. Not even.
At least with a forced marriage, he’d have had a chance to run for it before her family came looking for him. According to her, one thrust and it would have been a done deal. He’d have been mind-raped and shackled to her for the rest of his life before he knew what hit him.
A shudder ran through him, and he thanked his lucky stars he hadn’t finished things. Never mind that she’d been the one to stop him. And his heart ached with relief. Yes, that was all. No way was he wishing he’d actually gone through with it. He was a bachelor, wild and free and looking for a good time. It was too soon for him to get himself hitched.
Ignoring the eerie sense of disappointment beating at him, Whitt increased his pace as soon as he shot outside. He had to pass Spri’s apartment to get home, but he didn’t slow up. When he walked through his door some time later and collapsed on his couch, he realized his hands were shaking.
The scariest part wasn’t the idea of being married—bonded, whatever—to Spri. No, it was shockingly easy to picture spending his life with her: waking up next to her, making her laugh, loving her every night. She grounded him in ways he didn’t even understand. That was what scared the crap out of him.
How could she have become so important so fast? And how could he have come so close to claiming her as his own without even realizing it?
This required distance and time. He needed to stay away from her for a while and get his head on straight. If he took a wife, he was damn well going to do it on purpose. No Litting was going to crawl under his skin and mess with his mind with her telepathic sex tricks. No way. This decision was his alone.
Chapter Thirteen
Feeling Blue
A few days later, as Spri sat in the meditation center desperately searching for some inner peace, she found she couldn’t stop thinking about Whitt’s reaction. He’d raced out of the classroom like the hounds of Helios Prime were nipping at his heels. She’d been too shocked to chase after him, and ever since then he’d been avoiding her. Although she’d called several times, he hadn’t answered, and she hadn’t bothered leaving a message after the first one. Either he’d come back to her or he wouldn’t.