Done With Love

by Niecey Roy

  The memory flashed so bright, it was hard to believe it had happened so long ago.

  Yes, I’d been naïve to think two teenaged kids would fall in love and stay together forever, but those things did happen sometimes. I used to pray it would happen for us. Looking back, there’d only been good memories for us. Memories I wouldn’t give up for a second, not even now, even knowing he would eventually let me go. We were kids back then, and we had loved passionately, so completely—so much that the heartbreak had been worth it. Leo had been worth it. Everyone had a first love.

  My jaw throbbed from clenching my teeth together, and I shook the memories from my head. There was no sense in stirring the pot and getting lost in a relationship long gone. So I sat there beside him in silence, ignoring the gravitational pull that kept my heart begging to race while my mind warned it to behave. Even my elbows sensed the turmoil inside—they were numb. I wasn’t sure how long we sat there, but my stomach grumbled, reminding me of the sandwich inside. I stood and brushed off the seat of my dress. He must have sensed I wasn’t in the mood for conversation because he was silent as he fell into step beside me. We walked, our hands brushed with each step, until we reached the patio doors. The breeze rustled through the palm trees as he slid the door open for me, the soft swish of the ocean waves our only company.

  When I turned, I opened my mouth to speak, but when I met his gaze under the light of the moon, I couldn’t remember what I’d been about to say. He brushed his thumb across my cheek.

  I held my breath, waiting, but he dropped his hand. “Eat your sandwich and get some rest.”

  “I am a little hungry,” I said, my voice soft because the night was silent around us.

  He stared at me in thoughtful silence for a few moments before saying, “I’ll be in after a while.”

  I looked down to the six pack of bottled beer sitting on a lounge chair on the patio. Nodding, I turned and stepped inside. As I walked about the villa, my gaze kept traveling to his silhouette on the beach. Why are you here, Leo Moss?

  The dream was so vivid, my heart raced in a terrified staccato. The evil queen’s soulless black eyes bore into mine, and my insides burned until I screamed, clutching my stomach. Behind her stood Jeremy, his face screwed up in regret and confusion. Like a scared little boy, afraid to disobey. And even though he knew how much he hurt me, he did nothing. I called to him, but he wouldn’t help, and I fell to my knees in my beautiful wedding gown, the dirt on the ground staining the delicate material. He didn’t reach for me, not once, while my heart broke into a million pieces, and I wept because he didn’t love me.

  I twisted in my sleep, begging my mind to wake up, but I writhed in the nightmare until it faded to black. For a little while, my sleep was peaceful.

  The second dream was wrapped in fog, moments from my past, and a piercing green-eyed gaze making my heart flutter. The dream played on in a cloudy sort of silence, the kind that swirled and breezed through the empty space like mist. With each touch of his fingers and kiss of his lips, my heart swelled until I thought it would burst. Every sensation, every whisper, caressed my soul, and as he loved me, I opened my passion swollen lips, and whispered, “I love you.”

  The sound of my voice in the quiet dream startled me, and startled him as well. He drifted away, pulling from my grasp, until only his fingertips grazed my cheek. Then his hand disappeared amidst the haze. It was like tearing a piece of me away. And this time, when my heart shattered, it faded to dust and swirled away, and I finally awoke.

  I turned my face into the pillow so Leo wouldn’t hear me cry. Silent sobs wracked my body, and I tensed with the effort of holding them in. My throat burned, and my neck and chest ached—and the tears wouldn’t stop falling. The vice around my heart, the claws scratching at my throat—like hell sucking me in. I stifled a moan with the pillow, afraid to wake Leo.

  Funny how things worked out—he was the last person I ever expected to share a honeymoon villa with. My life had been turned upside down and inside out so quickly, I wondered if I’d ever stop reeling. Rolling into a ball, I fought for breath against the pillow.

  The bed shifted beneath me as weight was displaced, and I stiffened. The blankets tightened and then went slack. Solid muscle pressed up against the length of my body. His right arm slid under my pillow, his left arm wrapped around to cradle me against him. He whispered against my neck, “You’ll be okay, Princess. I promise.”

  My body settled back into his arms. I laid my cheek against the pillow and let him hold me until my tears were spent. My last wakeful memory was of Leo whispering soft nothings into my ear, and I drifted into a dreamless sleep.

  Chapter Seven

  I listened to Leo’s deep, even breathing for a few minutes before untangling myself from him and the soft cotton sheets twining our legs together. Fearful I would wake him before I made my escape, my heart raced and my cheeks burned. Padding whisper soft across the wood floor, I made a conscious effort not to make a sound. I didn’t want him awake yet, because I wasn’t sure how to face him after crying in his arms last night. When I reached the bathroom, I launched myself through the doorway and shut the door, leaning against it while sucking in deep breaths.

  What the hell was I doing? And what the hell was last night? And holy wow, I’d slept with another man. With Leo.

  Okay, so I hadn’t actually slept, slept with him. Just slept with him. Two nights in a row.

  I sounded like an idiot, even inside my own head. Sitting down heavily on the toilet seat, I dropped my face into my hands. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

  If he was going to stay in this villa, we needed rules. And he needed to sleep on the couch. Yes. After breakfast, I’d bring up the sleeping arrangements. Just a casual conversation. No big deal. Surely he didn’t think it appropriate to sleep with a woman who’d just left her fiancé—at the altar.

  I shed my clothes and stepped into the shower. The hot spray of water was supposed to calm my nerves, but I kept thinking about Leo. The smell of him, the feel of his body against mine. Even the luffa reminded me of Leo, though I wasn’t sure why. He could use it to wash my back…soap suds running down my slick wet skin and—

  The bottle of body wash fell to the shower floor, ripping me out of the daydream. Sex dream. Whatever. Okay, the shower hadn’t delivered the cleansing effect I’d hoped for.

  I twisted the nozzle off and grabbed the towel hanging outside the stall. Really, nothing good could come of him being here. Especially given our history. Especially when he has the body of a Greek god and a wicked smile. The very sight of him was sinful. And irritating.

  When I stepped out of the bathroom, Leo had his head propped in his hands leaning back against the headboard of the bed, a soft smirk on his lips. As if he’d been awake to witness my less than graceful escape from the bed. Perfect.

  “I ordered us some lunch.”

  His gaze followed me across the room where I stopped to open the patio doors. A warm breezed circled through the villa. Outside the view was brilliant blue for miles. “Thanks. I’m starving. I didn’t realize it was so late.”

  “I haven’t slept in like this in years. This island makes me lazy.”

  I glanced over my shoulder—yeah, he looked lazy, and relaxed, and very comfortable despite being half naked in my bed.

  “I’m sorry if I kept you up late last night.” I turned around again. A small boat with a red and white striped canopy skimmed across the water.

  “You didn’t.”

  “Oh,” I said. “Good.”

  “Ask for some extra towels when room service gets here.” He stood, and the sheet fell, revealing a pair of dark green boxer briefs clinging to the bulge beneath the cotton.

  My eyes nearly popped out of my head, and my mouth dropped open. Every ripple, every line of his perfectly sculpted thighs was something straight out of an underwear advertisement. I blinked, blinked again, and would have rubbed my fingers to my eyes if he weren’t standing in front of me.

  He was
kind enough not to mention my open admiration, only smiled before padding across the wood floor to the bathroom. “I’m going to take a quick shower.”

  “Yes, of course,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper. When the bathroom door shut, I let out a breath of relief.

  Holy wow. He was out of control. Out. Of. Control.

  This was not good. Not good at all.

  Watching Leo eat lobster was like watching a porno. His lips were nothing short of sinful. Every time his tongue flicked out to run across his lower lip to catch a drop of butter, I squirmed in my chair and stuffed more succulent meat into my mouth. This was the best seafood I’d ever had, but it wasn’t quite as satisfying as, say, other things. Other things you shouldn’t think about, not while looking at him.

  He peered at me over his fingers, pinching a piece of lobster dredged and tinted yellow with butter, and I itched to lean across the table and lick the meat into my mouth. I snapped my gaze away, up to connect with his, which wasn’t much better—his eyes had always been my favorite shade of green.

  “Let’s get something straight,” I said, concentrating on the Elephant Ear plant waving in the soft breeze just over his shoulder.

  “What’s that?”

  The amusement in his voice irritated me—there was no doubt in my mind he was aware of the effect he had on women. I was a woman, and I wasn’t immune. Just because I was annoyed with the entire male gender, didn’t mean I was blind. I plucked a cherry tomato from the bamboo salad bowl between our plates and popped it into my mouth.

  The fruit burst as I chewed. I had no idea what was the best way to handle this conversation. After I swallowed, I said, “I just left my fiancé.”

  He raised his brows. “I know this.”

  “I left him at our wedding,” I added, because inserting the dramatic details seemed the best route to success.

  “I remember.” He tore off another piece of meat and dipped it into the bowl of butter sauce. How did he make the simple task of eating look so sexy? And there he went again, licking his sexy lips. “Why aren’t you eating?” he asked.

  “Oh,” I said, staring down at my plate. I’d barely touched my food. I tore a chunk of meat from the lobster tail with my fork and dipped it into the butter. And then I dipped it again—I didn’t have a wedding to worry about, I could eat things like butter. And carbs. I eyed the cheddar biscuit in a basket between our plates. Maybe if I stuffed my face, I’d stop thinking about other things. Naughty things.

  While I chewed, my eyes drifted down to the light blue collared shirt left unbuttoned. His tanned chest distracted me from the speech I’d settled on in my head. When I finally tore my gaze from his chest, his eyes twinkled back at me. I’d been caught ogling the eye-candy.

  “What I’m trying to say…” Damn his distracting smile. I wasn’t even sure I wanted to talk sleeping arrangements anymore, just for the mere fact I didn’t think his shoulders would fit on the little futon couch in our villa. Wouldn’t it be cruel of me to condemn him to four more nights of restless sleep, all because I couldn’t be adult about our situation? Really. I needed to get a grip in a huge way. Huge, like his biceps. Ugh.

  He wiped his hands on a napkin. “Lex, why don’t you just tell me what’s on your mind?”

  “Okay. Right. I just think it would be best if…” I couldn’t choke the words out.

  He leaned back into the chair. “Are we talking about sex right now?”

  “What? No.” My cheeks burned. This talk was a bad idea. I pretended to be interested in my fork, but it was a fork. There wasn’t anything interesting about it, so he probably knew it was an attempt to avoid looking at him. “I’m just saying that…” I squirmed in my seat while he grinned at me. “I’m just saying, this isn’t the right time for…stuff. With you.”

  “Stuff as in sex,” he clarified.

  He’s enjoying this. I narrowed my eyes so he’d know I meant business.

  “Yes. Exactly.” I waved a cheddar biscuit in the air. “I just wanted you to be clear about what sleeping in the same bed means. For us. I mean, I’m glad we’re on the same page.”

  “So, no sex.” He leaned forward and stared at my lips. “What about kissing?”

  “Kissing?” My mouth was dry. Parched. Like the desert. I licked my lips, remembering the feel of his mouth against mine. Was kissing so wrong? I mean, really. It wasn’t sex. Kissing was absolutely harmless, right? And maybe a good kiss—or two—was what I needed to get over hating men forever. It might be the best therapy…

  “Yes, kissing,” he said. “Do you need a demonstration?”

  Why would I need a demonstration when our last kiss kept replaying in my head?

  “No.” I gave a firm shake of my head. “I mean, kissing isn’t a good idea.”

  “Doesn’t sound like a bad idea to me.” He sounded disappointed, which thrilled me.

  “I don’t think it’s bad. Kissing you isn’t bad. I mean, you’re not a bad kisser, it’s just…not happening.” There. That was exactly what he needed to hear, or maybe what I’d needed to hear, because the more I thought about it, the more I wanted to jump in his lap and kiss him. The idea of it made me squirm in my seat. Wow, it’s hot out today. My armpits were sweating.

  “I heard the best way to get over someone is to get under someone.”

  I choked on my water and spit it out all over the patio. He laughed as I worked to catch my breath and wipe my mouth with a napkin. I glared at him. “Very funny, jerk.”

  “What? It’s just what I heard.”

  “Well, I never have,” I lied.

  “Fine. I won’t kiss you.” He picked up his wine glass and winked at me over the edge. “Not until you kiss me first.”

  “Yeah, right.” I took a bite of biscuit, hoping to satisfy my hunger for all things Leo.

  “Or until you beg me to kiss you.”

  My eyes widened as I washed down the bread with iced tea. “That’s not going to happen.”

  His grin was diabolical. “Maybe not today, Princess.”

  I rolled my eyes, but my heart raced with anticipation. “Don’t hold your breath.”

  He winked, and I bit my lips against the smile. He stood and set his napkin on the table. “What’re your plans this afternoon?”

  I glanced to the book I’d tossed on the lounge chair beside the table. “Think I’ll just read. I’m still recovering from that hangover.”

  “Ah, chick porn. Got it,” he said with his gaze on the book.

  I rolled my eyes. “It’s not even a romance.”

  Earlier I had gone to the gift shop to look for something to keep my mind off of Leo. Most of the shelves were filled with romance titles, but I wasn’t interested in romance. Getting worked up over a steamy sex scene would be torture with Leo walking around the villa shirtless. So, I’d chosen a ghost haunting novel. I hadn’t read the blurb, but the mostly black shaded cover was a good sign there’d be nothing arousing about the novel. Anything without panting or moaning would get me through the rest of this vacation much easier.

  “If you say so.”

  I sat down on the lounge chair with the book in hand. “I do say so.”

  He dropped into the lounge chair beside me. “All right. I’ll just relax then.”

  Great, just what I needed, his bare chest to distract me. His skin glistened with tanning lotion and even though I tried not to, I kept sneaking peeks at his chiseled abs.

  “Relax? This coming from the guy who’s constantly on his phone?”

  “My dad decided to stick around the office while I’m here,” Leo answered, and I didn’t need any further explanation.

  Leo’s dad started the private investigative and security firm after retiring from the military, with the expectation for his sons to join after their own military service was over. Though his dad had taken a step back so Leo could take a more active role in the firm, I doubted he’d ever completely retire. I’d known Leo’s dad for almost as long as I’d known Roxanna, and the guy
was a workhorse.

  “Is he okay with you being here?” I asked the question in a casual tone, but I worried over the answer.

  “Of course. My parents love you. Even when you do crazy things like fly off to the Caribbean alone.”

  “Plenty of people fly to the Caribbean alone,” I said.

  His voice grew serious. “I don’t blame you for wanting to get away, Lex.”

  Talking about the Buchanans was the last thing I wanted to do, especially with Leo. I set my book down. “I really would have been fine, but…it’s nice to have someone here to talk to.”

  “I’m glad I came. I needed a vacation anyway,” he joked.

  He probably did. Roxanna mentioned he spent a lot of time at the office. “How is it being home again?”

  “I’m glad I’m back. I wasn’t sure how I’d feel about it after…” His voice trailed trialed off, and I looked over at him. The dog tags he wore on a chain around his neck shined in the sunlight.

  “You must miss him.”

  I had never questioned Leo’s decision to join the Army, not when every man in the Moss family had served since World War I. When Leo’s older brother, Jason, enlisted a month after Leo graduated high school, it was only a day later before Leo enlisted too. The night I found out he would leave for training soon, I told him how proud of him I was. Later, alone in my room, I’d cried. There were so many soldiers who didn’t make it home, and the idea of losing Leo that way haunted me every night while he was gone. Even after he broke up with me, I still worried. But Leo had come home alive; it was Jason who hadn’t.