Adrift

by J F Rogers

  “April 24, 1521 BC. April 24, 1521 BC. April 24, 1521 BC.”

  He swirled his finger around the edge. Like a rusty machine, hesitant to move after years of neglect, the rocks surrounding us groaned and trembled, then roared to life. They moved in a circle without disrupting the earth. Their momentum grew to a full spin until a seemingly solid wall of swirling rocks thundered around us. They spun, disturbing nothing. As if they didn’t exist. Within the circle, all was calm, like the eye of a hurricane. Not a hair twitched.

  I looked at wide-eyed Pepin.

  The whirlwind slowed as the rocks screeched to a stop. The wall disappeared as the stones returned to their stationary places. Only this time, Turas was perfect. Pepin sucked in his breath.

  Gone were the broken and felled stones. The larger stones in the semicircle next to us stood in five sets of twos, with a rock balanced across the tops of the pairs. Beyond that, shorter stones, still many feet above my head, stood the same size and distance apart, each connected by a stone balancing across, forming a perfect circle. How did the pech make such an incredible monument in the 1500s …before Christ?

  Pepin and I left the circle to see the whole thing. A brilliant light descended upon us. As it grew closer, a human form took shape in the fiery glow. I fell to the ground and tried to scurry away while shielding my eyes.

  Pepin dropped to his knees.

  “Do not be afraid,” the being said. “I am an angel sent by God.”

  An angel? I peeked between splayed fingers as the light dimmed and brightened, then dimmed again like a light with a faulty wire. The thing looked human but genderless with a glittering white robe tied by a golden cord. I trembled and lowered my hand as my eyes adjusted and stared at the creature.

  “You are in between the human realm in 1521 and the spiritual realm which exists outside of time and space. Angels and demons travel this space. Remain within Turas’s boundary at all costs and do not linger. Heed my warning. Should demons realize you’re using Turas to enter the spiritual realm, they will do what they can to deceive you. Make no mistake, their only intent is for harm, always. Be careful how often you use Turas. Return now to its protective boundary and never stray from it again.” The angel returned to the sky and disappeared.

  We scurried to the inner circle. I never wanted to see a demon. Ever.

  My over-firing brain cells took a moment to remember how to form words. “I—Uh—”

  “I’ll never get used to that.” Pepin’s movements waggled his braid.

  “Huh?” Higher-level brain functioning returned. “Oh, yeah. You’ve seen an angel before. That’s why you made Drochaid.” I touched the amulet around my neck.

  “Mmmhmm.” He moved to the depression in the stone. “Now we test it. Got anything in mind?”

  I nodded. “I know the date, but not the location.”

  “You may not need to repeat the date and location. Try to imagine what you know.”

  Imagine it? I thought about my mother, myself, and June twenty-first. I kept those cycling in my mind, as I had with the date, just not aloud. Pepin ran his finger over Drochaid. The swirling began again. A gray circle surrounded us once more, and blue sky appeared over our heads. As the circling stones slowed, I found myself in my farmhouse, only in better condition.

  “I’m home?”

  A woman’s scream rang out from upstairs. Rushing feet creaked the floorboards. A baby wailed. Was it me?

  I stepped forward, and my knee connected with something. “Ow!” I touched the invisible rock.

  “What is it?” Pepin placed a hand near mine.

  “The rock.” I tried stepping away, but Drochaid caught around my neck, suspended in midair. “How am I supposed to get up there? I’m trapped by this invisible stone.”

  “Try imagining yourself there instead of walking there.”

  I pictured myself walking through the house, and the scene changed as if I were. Up the stairs. So weird! Like a controllable dream. But I was wide awake, visiting my personal history.

  Light shone through a crack in my bedroom door. The baby’s cry and voices came from the room. Moving shadows broke up the light. The door burst open, and my grandmother—Fiona, only much younger—charged my way. I tried to dodge her, but I wasn’t quick enough. She walked right through me. Stunned, I inspected where she’d walked through me. I felt solid.

  I imagined myself walking into the other room, and I appeared there, along with Pepin. The room wasn’t as I remembered it. The walls were white. No wallpaper. But that was my bed, only newer…with Cataleen laying under a sheet. A man stood by her side holding an infant in a ducky blanket.

  “He’s so beautiful, Cataleen.”

  He?

  “She’s not done yet,” said a woman, peeking between the sheets. “Okay, Cataleen. One more push.”

  My mother took a deep breath. Her face, already red, darkened a few shades as she strained. She cried out again.

  I tried not to watch the woman with whatever she was doing. A few moments later, another baby cried out.

  “It’s a girl!”

  The man whooped with joy. The father? My father? A tear ran down his cheek and dripped on the baby boy’s head.

  The woman cleaned up the girl, wrapped her in a flowered blanket, and placed her in my father’s other arm. He froze as though petrified he might drop one before he adjusted both. Then he gazed at Cataleen. A smile overtook the fear, and he beamed.

  Was that my father? Was the girl me? That meant… I had a twin?

  No way.

  I’d never seen photos of my father. But my grandmother was here. And this was Cataleen. She’d never told me she had other children. Or that I had a twin.

  “Okay, Cataleen. Last one. Are you ready?”

  Another one? I was a triplet?

  Cataleen nodded, sweat beading on her forehead.

  I tried to ignore the birth-pain cries and imagined myself by the man who had to be my father. Black hair like me. Our faces were similar. My purple eyes came from Cataleen. His were hazel. I reached out to touch his face as he stared at his children with adoration. Just as I should have come in contact, my finger slipped through his face as if it were a mirage.

  Another baby cried out from behind me.

  “It’s another boy!” the woman cried.

  “Another son?” My father whooped again.

  “Here, let me take one.” Fiona walked through me and grabbed the boy in the ducky blanket from my father.

  I moved aside.

  “Sorry I’m late.” Wolf barged in. A stout man followed.

  Wolf looked younger. But not much. He must’ve become a fasgadair shortly after my birth.

  “Faolan, you made it.” My mother smiled.

  My grandmother put the firstborn son in his arms. “They’re all here.”

  “All? How many is all?” Wolf—shaken by the question?—jostled the babe.

  “Three. Two boys and a girl.” The woman helping Cataleen swaddled the last baby in a blanket covered in bears. She placed him in Cataleen’s arms.

  “Wow.” Still cradling the first boy, Wolf rushed to my mother’s side and touched her forehead. “Are you well?”

  “She’s fine,” my grandmother said.

  The stout man cleared his throat. “I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news on such a joyous occasion. But we have disturbing news from Sully regarding the children’s safety.”

  “What’s he saying?” my father asked Cataleen.

  “Here.” My mother pulled Drochaid from her neck. “Take this. Faolan and I understand English and Ariboslian.” She pointed to the strange man. “This is Declan Cael the third, an elder of my village.”

  Declan’s father?

  Once my father wore Drochaid, he returned to Declan’s dad. “What were you saying?”

  “Eh-hem.” He gave his chest a couple quick thumps. “I said I have unfortunate news from Sully regarding your children.” />
  “What’s that?” My father scowled at Declan’s father.

  “They’re not safe.”

  “That’s why Cataleen is in America. It’s safe. Aodan can’t get them here, can he?” my father asked.

  “Aodan isn’t the concern. And, according to Sully, they’re not safe as long as they’re together.”

  Cataleen sucked in her breath. “What does Sully know?”

  “There will come a day when you can no longer protect your children. They will still be young. If your sons are with you when this happens, all three of your children will die.”

  “What?” Holding infant me close, my father neared the man. “That can’t be. Honey, tell him he’s wrong.” His pleading face broke my heart.

  Tears slipped down Cataleen’s cheeks onto my little brother. “I’ve never known Sully to be wrong.”

  “Then where is Sully? Bring him here. Let him give us this news directly. Why trust this man?” My father jabbed a thumb toward Declan’s dad.

  “As she said, I’m an elder of Notirr. Cataleen can vouch for me.”

  “Aye, my love. ’Tis true.” She spoke through sobs. “We can trust him.”

  Declan’s father moved next to her. “If you care for your children’s safety, please allow me to take your sons. I promise to care for one. To raise him as my own. I’ll find a good home for the other.”

  “You can’t keep both?” Cataleen’s voice cracked. She tried to pull herself up, then fell back onto the pillow.

  Declan’s father shook his head. “According to Sully, we must separate them for their safety and for God’s plans to come to fruition.”

  “You can’t be serious.” My father’s head ping-ponged between Declan’s dad and my mother. A mixture of anger and pain—true anguish—twisted his face. “Please tell me you won’t suggest I give up my sons?”

  “I can’t watch any more of this.” My head reeled. I wanted to get away. I squeezed my eyes shut. The ground felt as if it had shifted. I opened my eyes. We no longer stood in the room, but in a swirling, gray vortex. The blue sky returned. As the circling stones stopped, the incomplete Stonehenge and the grassy field reappeared.

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  ◊◊◊

  I RAN FROM THE broken circles, fell to my knees, pitched forward, and puked. When my stomach settled somewhat, I moved away from the stench. I sat, elbows on my knees, head down, resting on my arms, and tried to breathe. My heart screamed at the injustice, my parents’ pain. My father’s pain. He died when I was three. How miserable those years must’ve been, wondering if his missing kids were okay. I could’ve had a family, brothers. Why would God allow my family to be torn apart?

  I screamed, and a flock of birds squawked and fled.

  Pepin sat beside me and rested his hand on my shoulder. He didn’t say a word. I was grateful for the silence.

  Was this what the voyeur in my head wanted me to find out? Declan was my—my brother? Acid rolled in my stomach, threatening to rise again. I wanted to tear my clothes or lash out at something. I had been attracted to my brother? My stomach lurched, and my heart ached.

  Did the voyeur know about my other brother as well? How did he know any of this?

  I grew up in a broken home. No parents. No siblings. I had Bumpah until I was seven. Then I was left with my grandmother who turned mean after his death.

  I could’ve had them all. Even for just a little while. And I wouldn’t be here, regretting having had feelings for my brother.

  My brother…

  We’d almost kissed! I touched my burning cheeks. Thank God, Wolf had been there to stop us.

  Wolf…

  He knew we were siblings. Hot tears coursed down my face. I was so embarrassed. So ashamed.

  But it wasn’t my fault. Or Declan’s. If people hadn’t been keeping secrets from us, we wouldn’t have made these mistakes.

  The anger I once wore like a protective blanket reemerged. I picked it up, wanting to wrap it around myself again. Better to be angry than hurt. And I was hurt. And angry. At my mother for keeping these secrets. But more so at Wolf. He’d been with me through the entire journey.

  But he’d been a fasgadair in wolf form. He never had a chance to tell me. And my mother was in captivity. There had been little opportunity to divulge these secrets before I left Ariboslia last year.

  But what about now? Or in Bandia? Or bored on the ship? There had been plenty of opportunities for either to tell me. What else did they keep from me?

  What about Declan? What would he think? Would he be too embarrassed to look at me again? Did he know? Was that why he wanted to stay a fasgadair?

  Brother. He’s my brother.

  Who was my other brother?

  Rustling in the bushes jarred me. A black-and-white blur dashed out from the trees and headed straight for me, ears flapping, mouth open, tongue flying.

  “Rác!”

  The dog barreled into me, nearly pushing me over, smothering my face in wet kisses. Just what I needed right now. Furry love.

  If Rác was here, then…

  Kai sauntered across the grassy plain. “I hoped I’d find you here.”

  I ran and hugged him, then sobbed into his shoulder.

  “Wha—?” He held his arms up as if unsure what to do. Then he hugged me and patted my back. He led me to a stone to sit. He drew something from his sack and unrolled it. Cheese. “I was getting hungry, anyway.”

  “Huh?”

  “Here.” He gave me the cloth.

  “Oh.” I wiped my eyes.

  “Why the tears? Are you that happy to see me?” He laughed.

  “No, I—” I didn’t mean to say I wasn’t happy to see him. “I mean. That’s not it.”

  “Then what?”

  My heart caught in my chest. Part of me was psyched to see him. But another part was angry. He’d abandoned me. Just like everyone else. He wanted me to leave.

  But had he? Or was I being overly emotional?

  Kai threw me a shy smile, and his dimple appeared. So adorable. He shifted his gaze to Turas. “So, are these old rocks helping you find the rest of your friends?”

  “Hmph.” Pepin stood and walked back to Stonehenge.

  “Not yet.”

  Kai sidled up close to speak into my ear. “I don’t want to offend the little fellow. But I’m curious how those rocks can help.”

  “After what I’ve just seen, I trust they will.” I caught a whiff of Kai’s airy pine scent. Wanting to lean in, I backed away. “Why are you here?”

  “What?” He straightened. “We’re not friends anymore?”

  “You wanted me to leave, so I left.”

  “Who says I wanted you to leave?”

  “You told me to go.”

  His mouth widened in mock shock. “I did no such thing. Once your ankle felt better, I assumed you’d want to find your friends. I was trying to be helpful.”

  What had happened? My memory failed me. But he was right. He never told me to leave. Not in so many words. I’d twisted whatever he’d said into an assumption. I had a flair for the dramatic. “That still doesn’t answer my question. Why are you here?”

  “You know how to make a man feel welcome.”

  “Sorry. You wouldn’t believe what I’ve been through.”

  “Care to share?”

  “Not really.”

  Pepin cleared his throat. “I hate to break up the reunion. But, Fallon, we need to find the others.” He threw Kai a look that might as well have said, “get lost.”

  “Mind if I join you?” Kai clearly couldn’t read facial cues.

  “I don’t think that would be wise.” Pepin wrinkled his nose as if he smelled something foul.

  “Why not?” Kai aimed his puppy-dog eyes at me.

  “We can’t reveal the pech’s secrets to just anyone.” Pepin folded his short arms over his chest—short hairy arms. Amazing how much body hair curled out of his rolled-up sle
eves. “You know too much already.”

  Kai looked to me as if asking me to override Pepin.

  But I didn’t really know him either. Rather than come to his defense, I grew suspicious. “Why do you want to be here? Why now? Are you interested in helping me? Or are you curious about Turas?”

  Kai shrugged. “I wanted to help, but it was risky. My village banished me, but at least I have my little piece of paradise. If I get caught near a selkie village, they’ll throw me in jail. So, I returned home. It was quiet. Too quiet.”

  “So, you don’t want to be alone?” I steeled myself, daring to hope for a better reason.

  He drug a toe through the dirt, scuffing his leather shoes. “I guess I’d rather take a risk. Even if the selkie find me in their territory and lock me away. I’d rather risk losing my home, my freedom. Even if I never get to the sea again, which is the worst torture imaginable…even to a sub-selkie like me. Better to spend my life doing something worthwhile for someone I care about than enjoying paradise alone with no purpose.”

  Someone I care about? He cared about me? If he was manipulating me, he was doing a great job. I sighed. Perhaps I should take a risk too.

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  ◊◊◊

  PEPIN KEPT SCOWLING. I hoped I made the right decision letting Kai tag along. I already had so many enemies. I didn’t want to get on the pech’s bad side too.

  “Ready?” Pepin placed Drochaid in its depression.

  “April 24, 1521 BC. April 24, 1521 BC. April 24, 1521 BC.”

  Pepin swirled his finger around Drochaid’s edge. Once again, the rocks spun. Kai grabbed my shoulder as the rocks swirled into a seemingly solid wall.

  When the spinning ceased, we stood in an unbroken Stonehenge. Kai walked around, gazing in the air at the massive stone perfection as he released random expletives of awe.

  “This is unbelievable.”

  “Yes. Let’s keep it that way. Particularly among the non-pech communities.”

  Man. What was Pepin’s issue with Kai? I’d never seen him so snarly.

  “Whatever you do, stay in the circle.” The angel’s warning sent a chill through me. No supernatural creatures appeared…yet. But what if a demon arrived while we lingered? I never wanted to face one. “We should go.”