Blow (TKO #3)

by Ana Layne

  She breaks the kiss and brings her fingers to her lips. “Whoa,” is all she says. I’m not sure whether that is a good thing or a bad thing. I’d hope it’s good. I don’t want to ask in case I’m dead wrong.

  The rest of the night, we sit on the couch laughing and talking. We kiss a few more times and each kiss gets better than the one before. I don’t want to take her home but I know if I don’t soon, one of us is going to fall asleep and then I’ll never hear the end of that from Ruston. Whatever’s crawled up his ass can stay there. I don’t want any part of it.

  Chapter 12

  Tamilyn

  Every part of me hoped Ruston wasn’t going to be home last night but seeing him there awoke so many feelings, and I had to remember what I’d told myself. I do want to give Austin a chance, and breaking that news to Ruston was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I could see the hurt in his eyes. I know I ripped his heart out and I feel terrible. No matter what he says, I feel terrible. He can’t possibly think what I did was easy. He’s my best friend and I knew deep down things were never going to be the same no matter how hard I hoped they would be. I knew I’d fucked up with him when he went to his room and shut the door. Once Austin brought me home, I wanted to call or text Ruston and make him talk to me but I knew that would be pointless. Ruston wasn’t going to answer the phone and talk to me. I’d be lucky if he ever spoke to me again.

  I sigh loudly, causing the young girl in front of me to jump. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to spook you. I was just thinking to myself. Are you ready?” I ask her.

  She grins and begins explaining her vision for her senior photos. Looking at her, I can envision everything and I can’t wait to see how this will end up. I’m excited to get through this shoot. Tonight, I’m going through the photos from the engagement shoot from the other day and then the ones from the fight.

  We’re standing in a field surrounded by wildflowers and Brinlee sits amongst them. “Pick one and hold it in your hand,” I instruct her.

  She twirls it around her finger before keeping still. I don’t say a word as I begin candidly shooting. I’m catching great shots and she doesn’t even notice it. That’s what I love about my job, capturing the beauty within. Beauty you can’t force. It’s just there, and Brinlee has plenty of it. When she realizes I’ve been snapping pictures, her face turns crimson. We spend another thirty minutes or more out there and I’m satisfied with our progress.

  As she drives away from the dirt road, I sit inside my car organizing my photography equipment. I’m guessing Austin is still at the gym. I haven’t heard from him yet so I decide to go home and begin sifting through the last few shoots. I begin driving when my phone starts ringing. I forget all the issues I have been dealing with when I see my mom calling. It’s been a long time since I’ve heard from my parents, but I know they needed that vacation.

  “Hey, Mom!” I answer excitedly through the Bluetooth setup in my car.

  “Hey, Tam, we’re finally home. How’s everything been?” she asks, her voice laced with concern. I’m their only child so it’s only natural they worry about me.

  “Everything has been fine,” I tell her. I don’t really want to elaborate over the phone.

  “I’m cooking tonight, so you and Ruston should come by.”

  Cue the lump in my throat. I wasn’t ready to have his name brought up just yet. I am nowhere near ready to attempt to explain any of what’s happened over the past few days to my mom.

  “I’ll see if he’s busy,” I lie. “But I’ll be there for sure.”

  “We’ll see you then.”

  I end the call and hit my hand against the steering wheel. Things are so fucked up right now and I have no clue how to fix them. I’m just ready to get home. Instead of looking over all the photos, I think I’ll take a nap until it’s time to go eat dinner. That is, if I can even fall asleep. My heart is heavy from all this turmoil.

  ***

  My alarm rings loudly on my phone, pulling me away from the nap I needed so badly. I thought I’d have trouble falling asleep but the minute I closed my eyes, I was passed out. As soon as I turn off the alarm and sit up, my phone begins vibrating again. I hope it’s Ruston so I can apologize, but instead it’s Austin. I notice this is not the first message but instead it’s the seventh. Holy shit, I slept through all the notifications. The messages start off with a simple:

  Hey

  Then reverts to:

  I’m worried, are you okay?

  I really need to text him back and let him know I’m fine.

  I’m so sorry! I fell asleep when I got home.

  It’s okay, I was just beginning to get worried. I didn’t know if you got lost in the fields today.

  I laugh at his lame attempt at a joke before I reply.

  Nope, I know my way around :)

  Want to grab dinner tonight?

  I can’t. My mom and dad are back in town from their vacation and I’m going there. Rain check?

  Of course. Have a good time.

  I will! I’ll talk to you later.

  I toss the phone on my bed and hurry to get ready. I’m fine wearing these clothes but I just want to freshen up a little bit. Two minutes later, I grab my phone and my purse, then lock the door. Soon, I’m in my car and on my way to see my two favorite people in the world.

  I pull into the driveway and smile when I see their car sitting there. I walk in without knocking and head straight for the kitchen. Mom is putting the finishing touches on a pot of potato salad and I look around for Dad. Mom wraps her arms around me and I hug her tightly.

  “Where’s Dad?”

  “He’s outside grilling some chicken and steaks. Where’s Ruston?” Mom looks around just in case he slipped past her or something.

  “Um, he’s not here. It’s just me.”

  “Is everything all right?” She eyes me. What is it with a mother being able to know what’s wrong without any sort of indication of a problem?

  “It’s good, Mom.”

  “Tamilyn Grace. You’re lying to me.” She sets the spoon on the plate beside the stove and places her hand on her hip. I cringe at my full name. It’s almost as bad as Ruston calling me Tammy Lou.

  “Mom, not now, please,” I beg her.

  “You know you can tell me anything, Tamilyn. Maybe I can help you through whatever it is.”

  I know she means well. She always does, and I always tell her everything, but something about this situation just seems so damn complicated. I start off telling her about Austin moving to town, and how jealous Ruston got. I cringe when I tell her how Ruston and I drunkenly had sex and we admitted our feelings for each other. I explain how I broke Ruston’s heart when I told him I honestly wanted to give Austin a chance, and how I haven’t heard from him before I shut up and wait for whatever motherly advice she’s about to throw at me.

  “Sit down, Tamilyn.” She points to the kitchen chairs. She sits beside me and pulls my hand into hers. “I think everyone has been waiting for you two to finally get together. You made a mistake, and I know you think everything is ruined, but just give it a little time. True friends don’t just give up on each other no matter what happens. I know seeing you with his cousin must be tough. You haven’t slept with him too, have you?”

  “No, mom, I’m not a slut,” I inform her.

  “I never said you were. I was just asking. But what I’m saying is, do what makes you happy. If you want to give Austin a chance, do it. It won’t hurt anything. Oh, and I forgot to tell you, but Paula, Mark, and Ruston are coming over for dinner. I hope this doesn’t make anything awkward.”

  “Mom,” I whine. “Did you not hear anything I just said? He hates me and we’re going to have to sit in the same room tonight.”

  “Maybe you should try talking to him this evening. It can’t hurt anything.”

  I hope she’s right. I really do. “How long until they get here?”

  Mom glances at the clock and replies, “Within the hour.”

  “I’m
going to go tell Dad hi. At least you warned me.”

  “Everything will be okay, Tamilyn.”

  I smile, hoping she’s right, as I walk out the back door. The smell of the grill takes over my senses and my stomach begins growling. “Hey, Dad. Next time, you really need to bring me along. I won’t get in the way.”

  He sets the spatula down and turns to face me. “Hey, baby girl. We definitely missed you. It’s good to be home. Thanks for cutting the grass, by the way.”

  “You’re welcome, Dad. I had some help from Ruston.”

  “How’s the photography coming?” he asks. Dad has backed my choice of career from day one.

  My face lights up as I begin talking excitedly about everything. I tell him about the couple, and the fights, before telling him about today’s shoot.

  “Fights? Well, you are becoming pretty popular aren’t you?”

  “It was a friend’s idea to take the photos. I’m glad I did. I think I got some pretty awesome shots.” I have no clue why I didn’t just say Austin, but that would be like reopening the wound all over again.

  “You’ll have to show them to me when you print them.”

  “Oh, for sure, Dad.” I grin. I watch as he opens the grill to flip the steaks and the chicken. I love little moments like this. I love being able to forget for one split second that I’m about to be made severely uncomfortable. I’m praying that Ruston and I can act normal in front of everyone. I don’t want anyone other than my mom to know what the hell is really going on.

  Oh fuck, I just got the worst feeling in my stomach. I’m praying the McGregors aren’t bringing Austin Moran.

  Chapter 13

  Ruston

  Mom begged me to go to dinner with the Hudsons tonight. I told her on one condition—no Austin. I need a night away, and seeing as how the dinner is at Tamilyn’s, I don’t want to deal with seeing the two of them together. Not after last night in my fucking apartment. How the hell am I supposed to react to her? For the sake of a peaceful dinner without suspicions, I’m going to have to act like nothing happened and cross my fingers that she plays along.

  I pull up to their house and park behind her car. I beat my parents here, but that’s how it normally works for us. I knock on the door and wait for someone to open it. Tamilyn’s mom opens the door and pulls me in for a hug. “Ruston, it’s so good to see you! Tamilyn is out back with Phil.”

  “It’s good to see you too, Barbara.” Ever since I was a teenager, she insists I call her by her first name.

  “Come in.” She waves me inside and I walk through toward the back door. I smile as I see Tamilyn talking to her Dad. I smile because no matter what, I can never be truly mad at her. No matter how upset I am, I love her, and just being around her reminds me of that.

  The back door is shut but I pull it open and their conversation stops when they see me. “Hey, Ruston, I was wondering when y’all were going to show up. Dinner should be ready soon. Want to give me a hand with the grill?”

  Phil Hudson has always been like a second father to me. Fishing trips were always numerous between us three guys—my father, myself, and him. Tamilyn just smiles curtly at me and walks back inside. She didn’t even say hi, fuck you, or anything. That stings a little. I was at least hoping for some interaction. I don’t even have a chance to react to the smile. I’m left standing there like a fool.

  To not draw attention to the situation, I walk over to the grill and take a look at what Phil has cooking. The steaks and chicken are mouthwatering. My stomach growls just looking at them. “How was the cruise?” I ask him, to get my mind off what is constantly racing through it.

  “We had a great time. Thank you for helping Tamilyn cut the grass, by the way. I know she wasn’t happy we went without her but we’ll have to plan another cruise and all of us go together.”

  The thought of that happening makes my heart swell but I know the chances of it actually happening are slim to none. With my luck, Tamilyn would want Austin to go and I’d be the odd man out. Crossing my arms over my chest, I just smile and nod.

  “Tamilyn told me she took some pictures at a fight. That must have been pretty damn cool to see.”

  A lump forms in my throat. Why does this feel like complete torture? “I, uh…didn’t go. She was with my cousin Austin.”

  “Oh? How’d she get involved with something like that, anyway?” He raises his eyebrow and I’m guessing Tamilyn didn’t delve that deeply into the conversation.

  The back door opens and my dad comes walking out. It’s almost like being saved by the bell except Phil is still waiting for an answer. “Oh, Austin ran into some guys at the bar and they told him about it. Supposedly, he was in a gym back home. He got me to join too, but it’s not really my thing.”

  Dad laughs from behind me, clapping his hand on my shoulder. “You don’t need to fight to prove anything, son. You’re smart as all hell and that’s all that matters.”

  “Thanks, Dad,” I mumble. I’ve thought a few times about how fighting may not be for me, but I’ve never spoken that aloud to anyone yet. Saying it is like the liberation I’ve been waiting for. My dad is right. I don’t need to fight to prove anything and I won’t. I’m done with the gym. I doubt anyone from that place will even realize I’m gone.

  “No offense, but I don’t see you doing that, Ruston. If it makes you happy, though, then that’s a different story.” Phil flips the steaks.

  “None taken.” I raise my hand. “It’s just honestly not me. I have no place inside there. I don’t know why I even told him I’d join anyway.”

  The door opens and Tamilyn walks back outside holding a pot of barbeque sauce in her hand. She hands it to her Dad and sits in a wicker chair. After crossing one leg over the other, she closes her eyes. I’m getting irritated. The least she could do is actually acknowledge me because our families know how close we are and they’re bound to grow suspicious if the rest of the evening continues this way.

  ***

  The dinner table is set and the food is placed in an elaborate display. My stomach is growling as I watch everyone sit down. My parents sit on one side of the table and Phil and Barbara take seats on the end. That leaves two spots open and they are side by side. I sigh as I begrudgingly walk toward one of the chairs. Tamilyn hasn’t seen this yet and I know her facial expression is going to be one for the books. I reach across the table for a paper plate and set it in front of me. I look up to see Tamilyn making her way toward the empty chair. Her lips are pressed together and she looks uncomfortable. Join the club. She pulls the chair out and sits down.

  Phil says the blessing and everyone begins fixing their plates. In almost true movie fashion, our hands brush against each other a few times. Her touch is electrifying and I’m being shocked each and every time. She still hasn’t said two words to me. I shovel a bite of potato salad into my mouth and look up to see Barbara eyeing the two of us suspiciously. Shit, she’s on to us.

  Eating is torturous but I’m hungry. I’m able to push her out of my mind for the time being. I will make her talk to me before this night is over, though. She stops mid-bite and pulls her phone out of her pocket. I don’t have to ask to know who is on the other end of that text message. The smile on her face says it all, and I step back from table. “Dinner was great. Thanks, Phil and Barbara.”

  “There’s plenty, Ruston, eat up.” Barbara smiles kindly.

  I politely decline her offer and walk straight toward the kitchen. Forcefully, I cram the plate into the trashcan while muttering a string of cuss words.

  “What’s gotten into you?”

  I turn to see Tamilyn just watching me. I really don’t want to get into this right now in this kitchen. I grab hold of her arm and pull her into the hallway where at least we can see if someone is coming. She yanks her arm from me, sending me an unfriendly glare.

  “What is your problem?” she hisses.

  “My problem? You mean your problem, right?”

  “You have issues, Ruston.”

&n
bsp; “No, Tamilyn, I don’t. You went back on everything you said and decided to give him a try. Well, I’m happy for you, I really am, but you hurt me. He had some nerve bringing you back to my apartment. You could have told him it wasn’t a good idea or texted me to tell me what was going on. I laid my feelings on the line for you, Tam, and I thought you had done the same but I was wrong. How the fuck could I have been so wrong, because even though we were both drunk that night, I know you felt the connection between us.”

  “I wanted to apologize to you, Ruston, I really did. I know I’ve made such a mess. I’ve become that girl and I hate it. I like him, though, and it’s only fair.”

  “How is it fair? I’ve waited for you all my life. He swoops in and suddenly you run to him. What about me?”

  “I love you. You know I do.”

  “Prove it then, Tamilyn, because I don’t really know.”

  Her lips crashing against mine take me by complete surprise. When I kiss her back, I kiss with as much passion as hers is laced with. My heart thumps wildly in my chest and I want her so badly but I don’t act on that. I’m too caught up in this moment to give a shit about anything else. She breaks the kiss and catches her breath. “I’m sorry I screwed everything up,” she whispers.