The Balance of Power (Godsland Series: Books Four, Five, and Six)

by Rathbone, Brian

  Kendra shook her head, as if trying to reconcile the speed and distances involved.

  "I know," Benjin said. "I still can't quite believe it myself, and my own daughter making it possible. What will this world bring me next?"

  "Bread and stew without most of the vegetables, I'm afraid," Millie said as she handed them steaming bowls and hearty chunks of bread.

  Both sat and ate.

  "What if Trinda is unwilling to let us return to the Godfist?" Sinjin asked while Benjin blew on his soup.

  "Since when do you need Trinda's permission to enter your own home?" Kendra asked, incensed. They'd had these words before.

  "I know I've the right to do so, but that doesn't make it the right thing to do."

  Benjin nodded and sipped his soup.

  "I think the Arghast would accept us," Sinjin continued.

  Kendra snorted. "You must retake Dragonhold. It's the only way."

  "Trinda controls Dragonhold; I do not," Sinjin said. "Trinda has power; I do not."

  "Power is not in the fist of the leader but in the fists that rise to his command!" Kendra said with conviction.

  "I don't disagree with the girl on that part," Benjin said. "Though she'll have to concede that a leader must consider the lives that would be lost. If, on the other hand, Trinda would relinquish your grandfather's farm and the cold caves back to their rightful owner, then we would have all we needed."

  Kendra made a rude sound in her throat. "How will you ever sleep at night, knowing that her assassins are out there, waiting to kill your family?"

  Sinjin had to think a moment before answering. When he drew a breath to speak, Kendra started speaking first.

  "You have strength," she said, gripping his shirt and pulling him just a little closer. "You have warriors and scoundrels and you've got me. Did you even consider that?"

  Sinjin nodded; he had considered it. He'd lost enough already; he didn't want to lose any more.

  "You don't have to go back to the Godfist at all," Fasha said, and Benjin gave her a dark look. It would appear that they'd had these words before. "There are beautiful places we found, perfect places to raise a family, perfect places to disappear."

  Kendra didn't appear to have the courage to scoff at Fasha, but she looked like she wanted to. Sinjin took her scowl as a no. After what might have been considered a polite interval, Kendra spoke again. "It's not just the people on this ship who'll follow you," she said. "Most of the people within Dragonhold will rise to your call, but call them you must!" The last was said as if there were no way anyone could argue her point.

  A note of sadness colored Sinjin's voice when he responded. "There are some who are loyal--of that there can be no doubt--but I think the number is smaller than you might believe. My mother's ideas were rarely popular, but she had the power and image to make things happen anyway, or at least somewhat. But the average person cares about feeding their family, and war feeds no children."

  "Not war," Kendra said. "A coup."

  "I don't know," Sinjin said. Then he had to hold on as the ship slowed, gently at first, then abruptly when the ship reentered the water. Before everyone had themselves settled back into their spots, Pelivor walked into the galley, the smile fading from his face when he saw the looks from the others.

  "Could you please give us some warning before you do such things?" Millie said, even as she retrieved stew and bread for him. Sinjin just waited for it. "The stew is missing the vegetables because someone was inconsiderate and didn't let the cook know before turning the ship on its side."

  "Well, I didn't know," he began, but Millie cut him off with a look. "There were black ships coming, and I didn't turn the ship on its side so much as--" Again, she cut him off with an outraged look, glancing down at her vegetable-stained smock. "I'm sorry," Pelivor said. "I'll warn you next time before I do anything inconsiderate or stupid."

  "That's all I'm asking," Millie said, her arms waving in the air.

  Morif just shook his head.

  She rounded on him. "What are you laughing about?"

  Morif just waved his hands in front of him as if to ward off her attack, and he started laughing.

  "You big oaf," Millie said with half a smile. "The next time, I'll make you clean up all of it. I'd make you cut up more if we had it, but supplies are hard to keep on a ship. It's just wasteful, I tell you. Disgraceful is what it is."

  Morif stood and cleared the bowls, but he walked away shaking his head, and Sinjin thought he saw the big man's shoulders move as he chuckled. Sinjin envied Morif in that moment; his ability to remain happy no matter what others thought of him was something Sinjin could take a lesson from. Though he wasn't certain how he would do it, he vowed to get there someday. In the meantime, he hoped he hadn't made Kendra too angry. That was when it occurred to him that Gwen hadn't joined them.

  Since Kendra didn't seem to be enjoying his company, Sinjin took a clean bowl from Morif and filled it with stew. After pulling a sizable chunk of bread from the loaf, he walked toward the hatch, still getting his sea legs and using the staff for support. The flight had been mostly steady and smooth, and it was a sudden and disorienting change. Part of him wanted to get the ship back in the air, but bad weather was coming. Near the stern, he found Gwen, standing with her hands still resting on the wooden tubes. He would have thought she'd want to be away from there, eating or resting, but she seemed content, her eyes closed and her breathing deep. For a moment, he considered leaving her alone since he did not want to interrupt.

  "Don't even think about walking away with that food," she said when he started to turn, her eyes still closed, but a small smile on her lips.

  "I never could sneak up on you," Sinjin said.

  "Still can't," she said, "but since you came bearing food and using the staff, I suppose you weren't trying all that hard."

  Sinjin handed her the food. He would ask no questions while she ate, as that would be rude, but he also sensed impatience from her. Still, he waited. Finally she set the bowl aside and just looked at him.

  "Were you going to come into the galley and eat with us?" he asked.

  The look Gwen gave him in response made it clear he was walking a dangerous path. "I was waiting for her to leave."

  "Who?" Sinjin asked, immediately wishing he hadn't. By the time the word left his lips, he knew the answer. Now Gwen's face grew sharp and angular, and her eyes danced with fire. That was no twinkle, and Sinjin knew it. "Wait."

  "I've had enough waiting," Gwen said, though Sinjin knew it hadn't been his fault that they'd been apart for so long. Always before their relationship had been something of a game between them, just like the enmity was. After a long silence, she said, "I see how she looks at you."

  Sinjin could have laughed, but he resisted the urge. There was nothing to be jealous of. He had no chance with Kendra or Gwen; both were impossible relationships. He'd always known, deep down, that Gwen would end up with someone else. Some people lived life; Gwen rode it like a spring colt. Whatever she felt, she felt passionately, and Sinjin always managed to find himself on the wrong end of those passions. His relationship with Kendra was purely circumstantial; she'd been close to him because there had been absolutely no one else to be close to. Part of him knew there were some cracks in his theory, but he was trying very hard not to think about those.

  "It's really good to see you again," he finally said, not knowing what else to say. Then he added, "You look nice."

  Though she seemed to be trying not to appear swayed by the compliment, Sinjin couldn't help notice her toss her hair. The reason he couldn't help notice was that she'd always been able to do that to him. A toss of her hair, an innocent look, or a twinkle in her eye had always rendered him useless in an argument. If he ever did manage to win, she would cry and get what she wanted anyway. For all these reasons, Sinjin did his best to choose his words carefully, yet the words he spoke slipped out anyway, "I have no home."

  There was a catch in his voice when he said it, and h
e could almost see something inside Gwen change in that moment. There was no more feigned anger or resentment, no more coy interplay; for that moment, he saw his old friend. With tears welling in her eyes, Gwen hugged him, and they both cried. It was at that moment that Kendra emerged from the galley, clearly looking for Sinjin. When she saw him, her face reddened and she turned away as quickly as she could. After a word with Morif, she disappeared into the deckhouse. That was a problem Sinjin would have to solve another time. As it was, Gwen had pulled back, an uncertain look in her eyes.

  "I'm sorry," she said.

  "Me too."

  "Your parents were good people," she said, and Sinjin bit his quivering lip. "And you always have a home with us."

  Though he knew it to be true, Sinjin could not imagine himself as a sailor; he'd spent most of his life within walls of stone, and being surrounded by nothing other than air and water seemed unnatural. He would need to find somewhere to call home. It was from the Greatland that they fled, and Sinjin had no desire to ever go back. Dragonhold, the only place he did fit in, was now controlled by someone whom he had barely tolerated. Though he'd been kinder to Trinda than most had, he had hurt her feelings on numerous occasions. It shamed him that it was only after realizing he might actually need her for something that he felt bad for mistreating her. Perhaps he was not as charitable a soul as he'd always liked to think.

  Though she remained silent, Sinjin could feel Gwen's eyes on him, and he met her gaze. There was kindness there and vulnerability; that perhaps frightened Sinjin more than anything else.

  "Is it hard?" he asked when he could find no other words. "Making the ship fly, that is. Is it difficult?"

  Gwen pressed her lips together for a moment, and Sinjin feared he'd upset her, but then she just nodded and smiled. "I don't actually make the ship fly," she said. "Pelivor does that. I just make it go faster. And yes, it's difficult and tiring, but we can do it for long periods of time nonetheless."

  "Have you tried to do what Pelivor does?"

  "I've tried a number of times," Gwen admitted. "I can affect the movements of the ship, but I've never been able to make her fly. Pelivor was the one who thought of using the thrust tubes, but still he cannot use them for very long. He is better suited to flying, and I am better suited to thrust. Sometimes we play off each other's energy, but the truth is that Pelivor can fly the ship without me as long as there is wind; without him, I wouldn't be able to make much speed with the ship in the water, but I could keep her moving."

  "That's amazing," Sinjin said, trying not to reveal that he felt more than a little jealous. He was, after all, powerless. He possessed some of the most potent artifacts in all of Godsland, but he could do nothing with them. That was when he made up his mind and pulled Koe from his pocket. Gwen's eyes were immediately drawn to the carved cat with its aggressive stance. Of course, it was the only dragon ore carving known to exist. "This does me no good. But I bet you could fly the ship using it. Here, take it."

  The look of awe on her face soon changed to fear, and she pulled away. "Too much," she said. Sinjin quickly put Koe back in his pocket. When he looked back to Gwen, there were tears in her eyes. "You have the most precious, beautiful, and dangerous thing in the world, and you want to give it to me."

  Sinjin opened his mouth to speak, but Gwen didn't give him the chance. Instead, she grabbed the empty bowl and moved quickly past him and into the galley. Feeling like a fool, Sinjin tried to figure out where he'd gone wrong.

  "They're all like that, you know," Benjin said. Sinjin hadn't realized the man had walked up behind him. "They think so much differently from us that they all seem crazy, or you end up feeling like a complete fool. Am I right?"

  Sinjin just nodded and Benjin laughed. "I should probably never give advice on women, but you need to start by accepting the fact that you'll never completely understand them; it's against the laws of nature. Haven't you ever wondered why tomcats fight or why stud horses kick trees? Women . . . that's why."

  Shaking his head, Sinjin smiled.

  "Don't take me wrong, now. I love women and a few of them love me back, but I don't expect I'll ever understand them."

  "Thanks, Benjin."

  "Don't you worry about it; the girl's always thought highly of you."

  The conversation was going in a direction Sinjin wasn't certain he was comfortable with. "Do you know where Kendra went?"

  "She's in her bunk. It's right next to yours."

  Sinjin was relieved and anxious all at once. Benjin escorted him into the deckhouse and acquainted him with his bunk. It was small but far better than his previous sailing experience had been. Those memories tormented him at times, but he did his best to let the past stay in the past.

  Benjin left him to get some rest, but Sinjin knew he wouldn't sleep well if he thought Kendra was angry with him. After a light knock, she said, "Come in."

  Sinjin entered with his head bowed, partly to fit through the hatch and partly to avoid making immediate eye contact with Kendra. When he finally did meet her eyes, they looked puffy and red--not a good sign. He tried to remember what Benjin had just taught him, but in that moment, he could find no way in which that information was helpful. It didn't tell him what to say, or how to keep from making mistakes that ended with tears. All Benjin's advice did was to tell him to expect defeat. Grudgingly, he acknowledged that the information wasn't completely useless. At least he could have realistic expectations.

  "I hope I didn't upset you," he said.

  "You're not the only thing in the world I might be upset about, you know," she said. "Has it occurred to you that I lost my mother just as much as you lost yours?"

  "I'm sorry," Sinjin said, feeling genuine regret for not having talked with her about that sooner. Of course she must be feeling the pain of having lost her mother after having been betrayed by her. They didn't know if Khenna was alive or dead, but Sinjin could see why the woman would be lost to Kendra nonetheless. "I know it must sound like I think that everything is about me, but that's not it. It's just that I made Gwen cry, and then I came to see you, and I was feeling pretty thoughtless and stupid--"

  "Wait," Kendra said, her voice firm and her anger now clearly directed at him. "You made Gwen cry?"

  If Sinjin could have thought of any excuse to leave, he would have, but he was trapped by his own words. How could he have been so foolish as to even mention Gwen's name in this conversation? "Uh . . . well, I, uh. I thought that maybe she could get more use out of Koe than I could, so I was going to give him to her."

  The look in Kendra's eyes convinced him to stop talking. "You were just going to give one of the most powerful artifacts in all of Godsland to some girl?"

  "She's not just 'some girl,'" Sinjin said, knowing it was a mistake. "I've known her my whole life."

  "That's sweet," Kendra said. "There are decidedly less expensive ways to garner the affections of a girl like her. Buy her a good meal and a new dress, and I'll bet she's yours."

  Sinjin tried to think of what to say and remembered Benjin's words again. With that in mind, he bowed his head and retreated from Kendra's cabin. From the corner of his vision, he saw a figure move just as the first sheets of rain fell. Knowing Gwen had seen where he'd come from, Sinjin went to his bunk feeling low. He hadn't expected to get much sleep, which was good since something in the cabin next to his kept banging on the wall until the early hours.

  Chapter 5

  Mistakes are like enemies--easily made but not easily unmade.

  --Benjin Hawk

  * * *

  As the shadows grew long, the mists beneath Allette grew bolder and stalked her. Not much longer and they would claim her. Her doom seemed to wait there and she whimpered. The pain alone brought tears to her eyes, but the fear made them impossible to hold back. After a few testing movements, she found her muscles sore, her skin bruised and a number of scrapes, but no broken bones. A single glance up showed that no one was looking down on her. No one cared. Her father was the only pe
rson in this forsaken place that cared for her, and he was gone. Even if he lived, he was lost to her. She was on her own. The Cloud Forest and the Jaga stood between her and the Midlands.

  That thought chilled her. She'd flown over the Jaga to get to the Heights, and the memory of it made her skin crawl. What wasn't desolate and barren was verdant swamp, filled with things that crawled and slithered and flew. There were feral dragons there. Allette had not seen any on her flight, and for that she was grateful, but she knew they were there. Deep in the center of the swamps had been a place she'd looked at only once, and the memory still sickened her. Even from the air, she had smelled the stench of it and had been compelled by curiosity to look down. There she had seen a seething pit of wrongness, mottled gray and black, slick with ooze, and from that place crept and crawled unnatural things, things that shouldn't exist.

  The jungle surrounding it was surely impassible, and the thought of crossing through that festering swamp stole her breath. There must be another way home, she thought. She was the daughter of sailors, and sailors did not give up when things got hard. They toughened up and survived. Gritting her teeth, Allette pushed herself upright and stood. It took three hops before her right leg would bear her weight, but then the pain became less intense and she was able to stand. Though her bruises ached, the movement helped ease the pain of her stiff muscles, and sweat poured from her. The mists had closed in, and she was bathed in moisture, her clothes almost instantly soaked. Visibility was low and the light from above illuminated the mists, making it even more difficult to see.

  Shadows moved within those mists, and there were grunts and whispers. Allette thought that madness might have claimed her when she heard a voice call out her name. It was soft and in the distance. She couldn't be certain, and it troubled her. The mists, her father had said, were actually clouds and could be very dangerous.

  Down. That was the only way out. She had to go down.

  Slowly and deliberately, she began to move downward, deeper into the mists. It seemed like a journey into insanity. No one would choose to go into those roiling vapors, but Allette had no choice. If she stayed above the clouds, she would die. She would at least have a chance if she made it into the Cloud Forest itself. Certainly there were dangers there, but there was also food. The rumbling of her stomach reminded her that all she'd had to eat was some bitter citrus. At that moment, though, she was worried about becoming food for something else. Not for the first time, she saw shadows moving through the mists, whispering and gibbering as they went, and Allette did not want to know what made such noises, she didn't want to see these beings that seemed to be stalking her.